6 months to live...and not a clue what to say

I'm worried about Kat. She went from posting daily to completely disappearing. Doesn't seem like her.

My husband who doesn't want to be a husband but still lives here, is coming home from the hospital tomorrow probably. Thanks K2 for asking.

I have been very depressed lately and can't seem to pull myself out of the muck.

Just made an interesting thread on the jack o' lantern spectacular at a zoo here in R.I. 5000 minumum lit up pumpkins! I have vids and a couple of pics. No comments at all except my own.
www.abovetopsecret.com...

How are you doing K2????

reply to post by Night Star


I sent Kat a u2u on the 27th

It hasn't been read yet.

I'm still going with gone away on holiday to celebrate.

Great news that about Mark Night Star

And if you're a bit down have these

And (((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))))

From across the pond

Cody

Maybe shes having a hard time. This is a sad story and I have gone through events similar to this recently. The only thing I could suggest to her if she comes back and reads this is to help her friend after she is gone. Ask her if there is anything she can make happen for her. I know if I was passing and I had a child I would ask my friend to look out for them. I believe there are things I might need a friend to take care of after I was gone. Her writing those things down and someone promising to look after her final wishes might put her mind more at ease. Anyhow hope you're OK Kat.

Pimpintology
Maybe shes having a hard time. This is a sad story and I have gone through events similar to this recently. The only thing I could suggest to her if she comes back and reads this is to help her friend after she is gone. Ask her if there is anything she can make happen for her. I know if I was passing and I had a child I would ask my friend to look out for them. I believe there are things I might need a friend to take care of after I was gone. Her writing those things down and someone promising to look after her final wishes might put her mind more at ease. Anyhow hope you're OK Kat.

I think you have Kat confused with K2. K2 has the friend that she will be losing. We also had a member just lose their daughter. Kat had just been found cancer free after a fight against it. She was thrilled and happy and then wham gone. I'm figuring either computer problems or something is going on in her life but don't know what. I would imagine she would have let us know why she has been gone, which is why I'm figuring computer problems and her not being able to get on.

reply to post by cody599


Awwww Cody, you are always so sweet and thoughtful. What would we do without you? Thanks for making me smile!

Night Star
I'm worried about Kat. She went from posting daily to completely disappearing. Doesn't seem like her.

My husband who doesn't want to be a husband but still lives here, is coming home from the hospital tomorrow probably. Thanks K2 for asking.

I have been very depressed lately and can't seem to pull myself out of the muck.

How are you doing K2????

Night Star, I have been married 24 years and sadly I think it is over. He came back from Afghanistan with terrible problems I do not understand and cannot deal with. He does not want to be a husband either. He goes days without even so much as acknowledging I am alive. He doesnt talk to me ever. He is either asleep or playing computer games. I will always love him but he makes me very angry. I am angry that he doesnt put any effort into our relationship at all. He is selfish he is unkind. He is no longer the man I married. It is funny, I was talking to my girlfriends Friday about the situation and EVERY one of them told me to get out. Life is short. I just do not know how to walk away after being with him since I was 17 (I am now 45!!) It has been bad for about 5 years now..and I know it will not get better. I have tried date nights. I have tried begging him to come out of this but he wont. He is on many pills for bipolar and depression. They dont help. He frustrates me to no end. Recently, a friend (a guy) from high school has been talking to me on facebook. I had to stop talking to him because he says all the right things. I am vulnerable and I know it. SO I took a facebook vacation. LOL I do not want to be unfaithful but I came very close. I get no affection. No love. No attention from him. What does he think will happen? I cant live this way. I know it. I tried talking to my 18 yr old daughter about it Sunday and she said "work it out mom...you cant divorce daddy" The guilt is awful. I dont want to wreck her world. She is the only reason I still live here. So I understand totally what it is like to live with a man who does not want to be a husband. I am sorry. I am here for you if you ever need to talk.

Lisa is doing as good as can be expected. She went to the oncologist yesterday and they are sticking with her current treatment...the one that is supposed to help extend her life. Her cancer tumor marker cells doubled from last month. I know it is getting worse. I cant look at her and see a sick person. When I am with her she is normal. It is so daggum mind boggling that a person can (other than having no hair) look NORMAL and be dying.

I hope Kat comes back soon. I miss her. I am terribly worried.

Love ya bunches..

Take care Night Star..you are really a Night Star you know..you are a beacon of light in a dark world...I love you for that

Awwww Thank you Sweetie! Wow I guess we really can relate on the husband thingy. I won't blame you no matter what you decide to do. I know how hard it is to be a part of the wall so to speak. 24 yrs and 34 years are a very, very long time to be with someone. It is so sad when it is one sided. I probably should have left a long time ago myself, but I just can't.

I have gained so much weight over the years and am disgusted about that. I doubt I could ever trust again. I am just sort of living one day at a time fighting depression and anxiety. Not even looking for a new relationship. I still have my sense of humor and can be a lot of fun to be with though. LOL Just that some days are worse than others and so much is going on all the time.

I am so glad that I found this thread initially and made real friends in here. You are quite a treasure and someone I am proud to call 'friend'. Love ya!

Good day ladies, I'm not looking my best right now



And I was feeling a bit like this when I awoke


Then I read your posts, and realised just how lucky I am. It made me wonder if Mrs C is happy or if I take her for granted.

She just stomped through (she isn't at her most elegant first thing) and we had a cuddle. Looked at each other and both said at the same time "I love you"

It just took the meaning to a new level if that is possible.

Thank you both for making me realise just what a lucky guy I am.

For you both



Cody

Those flowers are just gorgeous!!!!!!!!! Wow!!!!!!!!!

Somehow Cody, I doubt very much if you take Mrs.C for granted. Glad that someone is happy in their relationship anyway. Just let us know in 24 or 34 years how things are going. LOL

reply to post by Night Star


Ummmmmmmmm

24 or 34 hours is hard enough for me to deal with

Can I let you know tomorrow ?

Cody

reply to post by cody599


LOL Ah, so that's the secret, taking one day at a time.

cody599
Good day ladies, I'm not looking my best right now

And I was feeling a bit like this when I awoke

Then I read your posts, and realised just how lucky I am. It made me wonder if Mrs C is happy or if I take her for granted.

She just stomped through (she isn't at her most elegant first thing) and we had a cuddle. Looked at each other and both said at the same time "I love you"

It just took the meaning to a new level if that is possible.

Thank you both for making me realise just what a lucky guy I am.

For you both

Cody

Aww Cody thank you! I think Mrs C is a lucky lady and you a lucky guy. glad you are happy in your relationship. I feel that it is out there somewhere for me...I just am too afraid to take that step to find out. Ya know?

Love ya and you are a ray of sunshine in an otherwise bleak dark world.

reply to post by k21968


I'm a lucky guy

Only cost me a marriage, a fiancée, and us about $7000

The best time, energy, emotion, and money we ever spent.

Would I change it ?

Not for a guaranteed seat at God's right hand for eternity.

Cody

Hello! Mark is home and has visiting nurses. He is getting antibiotic drip at home. He is finally eating and feels better than he did but still has pain.

Good God it's 4:13 am and can't sleep yet.

How ya doin' K2? Cody? Anyone else who may be lurking?
How is Lisa??

Night Star
Hello! Mark is home and has visiting nurses. He is getting antibiotic drip at home. He is finally eating and feels better than he did but still has pain.

Good God it's 4:13 am and can't sleep yet.

How ya doin' K2? Cody? Anyone else who may be lurking?
How is Lisa??

Glad Mark is home. I didnt sleep well last night either.

I am ok. I am on overtime this week so I am exhausted. By quitting time today I will have put in 60 hours this week.

Lisa is ok. Her birthday was yesterday. She went out to dinner with our friends. I was sad I couldn't go.

No updates really on Lisa. Her tumor marker tests have doubled...she assures me that they ebb and wane...but I think there is something she isnt telling me.

I need a nap. At 530 pm when work is done...I plan to do just that.

I hope you get some rest Night Star!

Ahhhhhh

Two of the favourite ladies in my life, and both of you exhausted

Damn I'm good

Well chuffed to hear that Mark is home Night Star (sorry that's the Londoner in me. It means extremely happy)

I was listening to my Ipod at work today and this came on.


I literally stopped in my tracks, and thought you two, a tear came to my eye.

Luckily I had my guitar in the car, so at lunch I ran out and grabbed her.

Us smokers all sat around while I tuned her, and played it.

The comments

Man that was brilliant, you made it sound happy. So I said it was for two special friends that need a smile
they'll get the vibes.

Luckily the guys at work know me, and know my obsession with ATS, they all asked me to send a smile as well.

So from the lads at work




Cody

Thanks sweet Cody! So...those friends of yours...they married? LOL Kidding.

You need to make some youtube vids of your playing guitar and singing!!!!!!!! I would so LOVE to see that!!!!!

cody599
Ahhhhhh

Two of the favourite ladies in my life, and both of you exhausted



I literally stopped in my tracks, and thought you two, a tear came to my eye.

Luckily I had my guitar in the car, so at lunch I ran out and grabbed her.

Us smokers all sat around while I tuned her, and played it.

The comments

Man that was brilliant, you made it sound happy. So I said it was for two special friends that need a smile
they'll get the vibes.
]

Aww thank you Cody! That was sweet and I love that song! I would love to hear you play. Video it for us , PLEASE??

That's it Cody, you're out numbered. Now you have to make a vid for us. LOL

reply to post by Night Star


Next time I'm playing a gig I'll try to remember to get some video, I'm sure there's some on youtube somewhere. From a Halloween gig a few years ago.But that band has since parted ways owing to real life getting in the way.

I'll see if I can find them.

Cody