friend since I was 13 years old (33 years now) told me last weekend she has 6 months to live if she was
She has been fighting breast cancer for 6 years. Beat it once. It came back. Beat it again. It came back this time with a vengeance. She had spots in
her lungs, her bones, and her spine. She has been undergoing chemo and radiation this time for 8 months. This past weekend she told me her cancer has
spread to her spine and her liver and the doctor told her there is nothing else they can do. It is too spread throughout her body.
I stood there as she told me this in shock. I did not know what to say. I hugged her and said "that is B*llsh*t no one can tell you when you are going
to die. Then I said, "I could get hit by a semi driving home from here". That is crap!!
I was angry. It was not the reaction I thought I would have. It was not appropriate.
She lives about 5 hours away from me. I get to see her once a month. I cannot bear the idea that I will only see her 5 more times.
This is unreal.
I told her (after I processed it all) that I wish I could take her pain and worry away. I wish I could make it better. I told her all I could offer
her is to let her know I am here for her 24/7/365...just a phone call away.
It just doesnt seem like enough. I feel so helpless.
If LIsa leaves me, I know my heart will never recover. I feel so selfish. She told me the day she gave me the news all she wants is to live until
February to watch her daughter graduate from college.
February..that is 5 months away.
I now look at everything with her in urgency. Time it goes too fast. I want more. She is my sister from another mother. She gets me. She always has. I
have aspergers and I am "quirky" she loves me quirks and all.
What do I say?
Part of me wants her to do something amazing for her daughter...like help her make videos or write letters. But that feels like I am giving up on her.
But If she truly has 6 months...we have to get busy.
How do I suggest to her I can help her with her wishes...help her fulfill them after she is gone...without giving up on her?
Oh this sucks so bad. My heart is truly hurting and breaking.
I feel so freaking selfish but she is an amazing person and the world needs to know about her, her daughter needs to know her stories from the past,
and her grandchildren deserve to know their grandmother they will never meet.
What do I do???
edit on 7-9-2013 by k21968 because: Added a pic of Lisa and I.
edit on 7-9-2013 by k21968 because: (no reason
edit on 7-9-2013 by k21968 because: (no reason given)