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reply posted on 12-12-2008 @ 03:52 AM by doomsauce
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Originally posted by md11forever
Ok, here we go. From a fairly active thread, this one nearly made me spit Vitamin Water out all over the desk.
"Dell Computers putting top secret UFO cordinates in their software
I have a graphics card that i just got from dell and it tracks the coordinates of the us military and unidentified flying objects throughout outer
space. its the weirdest thing i have ever seen."
From: www.abovetopsecret.com...
Here's another one from that thread
Originally posted by Roosje
dude, move your mouse. It's called a screensaver!
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reply posted on 14-12-2008 @ 12:30 AM by whitewave
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Another winner from the thread Who Wants To Go Out With Me:
Who wants to go out with me?
I'm Jesus, Buddha, John Lennon, MLK, AND I stole Kurt Cobain's eternal soul.
So who wants to go out with me? I promise, I won't steal your soul... for a while. It's your responsibility to renew my vows of non-soul-theivery
every 90 days....
and that's retroactive, so actually your soul is already mine so you have no choice.
Sucks to be God's girlfriend, huh? Tell that to Mary Magdelene.
Yep, I'm thinkin' of givin' that boy a call. Should be an interesting date....NOT!
[edit on 14-12-2008 by whitewave]
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reply posted on 14-12-2008 @ 03:32 PM by ofhumandescent
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"If you worship your enemy, you are defeated.
If you adopt your enemy's religion you are enslaved.
If you breed with your enemy you are destroyed."
-- Polydoros
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reply posted on 15-12-2008 @ 02:15 AM by cmd18B
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reply to post by ofhumandescent
WTF....thats not a quote...its an unacceptable post....You must pass go and collect 200 dollars and go pound sand....Do not attempt to derail the
thread with your schoolhouse rhetoric..................Magna res est vocis et silentii temperamentum
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reply posted on 15-12-2008 @ 03:49 AM by snowen20
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reply to post by ofhumandescent
[more
Stop with these off topic quotes, your killing the graveyard/burial ground.
Polydoros does not exist in ATS so try using this thread properly.
This is like strike two with you for petes sake, what gives?
[edit on 15-12-2008 by snowen20]
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reply posted on 15-12-2008 @ 05:35 AM by silo13
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Anti-Governments quote concerning the quick reflexes shown by President Bush in dodging the shoe thrown at him at the press conference.
Mmm he moved just like the guys from the matrix makes you think doesn't it
Really hit my funny-bone with that one - thanks Anti-Government!
*P*E*A*C*E*
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reply posted on 15-12-2008 @ 04:33 PM by cmd18B
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reply to post by silo13
I never laughed so hard when that shoe came flying at him...I mean I needed a good laugh and got it....
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reply posted on 18-12-2008 @ 09:44 AM by Good Wolf
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reply to post by cmd18B
The other guy standing next to bush did absolutely nothing- as if he were AFK. 
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reply posted on 25-12-2008 @ 12:12 AM by chapter29
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paperplanes already posted a doozy from This One... -
the OP claimed to be from a 'ruling family' and went about business with quite the smug attitude...
posted by Hidden_Hand
"Our Lineage can be traced back beyond antiquity. From the earliest times of your recorded "history", and beyond, our Family has been 'directing'
the 'play' from behind the scenes, in one way or another."
Then this beauty from Interestinggg:
Your family's sickeningly filthy reign of terror soon draws near its end.
This I can promise you.
Nice!
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reply posted on 20-1-2009 @ 01:02 PM by ziggystar60
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Another quote for eternity...
In a thread called "Why are no planets named after modern gods?",
Copernicus had this to say:
How about we find the least bright planet in the universe and name it Bush?
www.abovetopsecret.com...
 
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reply posted on 22-1-2009 @ 03:36 AM by Raud
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Originally posted by prevenge
Originally posted by spitefulgod
It's a computer render with a blur added later, you just have to look at the wood texture and radiosity for that. Very well done, but unluckily a
fake.
[edit]
Although I may have to bow to Kalomar superior post.
[edit on 10/12/2008 by spitefulgod]
ooo you know what radiosity is...
good for you..
but guess what radiosity is being outdated with occlusion shaders.
the video is not CG
hate it when every kid and his brother are going around to every vid posted yelling CEE GEE CEE GEEE!!! I know CEE GEE terms.. it's CEEE GEEEE!!
SEEE!?
-
Thread: "Disgusting fish-like creature"
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reply posted on 23-1-2009 @ 08:10 PM by MischeviousElf
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Lol well I am sure before I even finish this post the post I am going to quote and thread and member banned/trashed,
However it is a very funny one liner,
Posted by mmmm Banned member "Clown"
In a Thread
Barrack Obama Invests 1.5 million into clown porn industry:
even my bus driver is in the clown porn industry
If its still there can be found at: Here
A bit funny if not right to do on ATS
Elf.
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reply posted on 24-1-2009 @ 04:57 PM by chapter29
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Here's a doozy by FlyersFan from a thread discussing a cleric requiring his followers to convert aliens to Islam -
Thread
Originally posted by FlyersFan
Two things ....
1 - He's acknowledging the likely hood that there are aliens.
2 - I'd looooooove to see them try to force Islamic conversion on aliens to 'make them subservient to Allah'. They'd get a butt-probe so fast it
would make their eyes pop out of their heads.
I would pay to see #2 happen BTW...
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reply posted on 24-1-2009 @ 05:32 PM by bigfatfurrytexan
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reply to post by chapter29
That has to be one of the funniest things i have read on ATS in a LOOOONG while. I have visions of Eric Cartman in my head, now.
Thank you for sharing. 
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reply posted on 7-2-2009 @ 03:25 PM by chapter29
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Found this one in the recent Ouija Board Thread - it's from mastermind77 and it was
the only post from him, so I have no idea if he was being serious or sarcastic...
But it's comical as hell and even comments on the spirits sexual orientation...
Originally posted by mastermind77
the board is evil. and only evil. the room got down to fog and about 40-50 degrees fast on a summer night. The piece moved without me touching, it
pulled my finger along. The spirit was gay, and likely a former criminal of some kind. My friend, a chick, would draw out her own because she
was addicted. Do not do the board, only suffering awaits for someone. my life has been lame since i used it. And people randomly are agrivated by
me, when they normaly arent for similar things in others. its not me..i change alot for others, and its annoying, demons are annoying.
I get the feeling mastermind was serious...
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reply posted on 7-2-2009 @ 06:18 PM by Good Wolf
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reply to post by chapter29
And people randomly are agrivated by me
...I wouldn't be so quick to blame the board on that one.
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reply posted on 7-2-2009 @ 06:29 PM by chapter29
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reply posted on 15-2-2009 @ 12:25 AM by chapter29
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This one was short and to the point...the thread was discussing whether one could remember being born or not...
Some posts are just Golden...
Originally posted by starlitestarbrite
I remember being born do you?
Classic from King...
No, I don't remember you being born.
Nice...
drkun eitd!
[edit on 2/15/2009 by chapter29]
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reply posted on 15-2-2009 @ 02:36 AM by paperplanes
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I'm not sure why I didn't think of including this quote earlier. It's taken from a thread Doomsday2029 created to lambast users of "evil"
avatars; asmeone2 replied to the OP and Lasheic posted a reply to asmeone2:
www.abovetopsecret.com...
Originally posted by Lasheic
reply to post by asmeone2
Actually, I was trying to give you the plague with my avatar, but I haven't found a way to get the germs to go through wireless internet.
If you're using Linksys, try clicking the Advanced button under your Port Forwarding tab. Set TCP 88, UDP 3301, UDP 2184, and GTP (Germ Transfer
Protocol) to 7782 for the Black Death. If you have a different plague in mind, you'll have to check out a FAQ for the correct port range. Be sure
UP&P is enabled.
[edit on 15/2/09 by paperplanes]
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reply posted on 26-2-2009 @ 08:28 PM by chapter29
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I just came across ths one in a thread about special
abilities...the OP was looking for a way to unlock theirs.
Now, this quote may not be funny, though comical in a cynical way but definitely worth a 2nd look...and anyways, Hallberg just lays it down like a
champ.
Originally posted by Hallberg Rassy
Putting away 10% of your paycheck each week is pretty special...voting every election after studying the issue would be pretty special, treating
your nieghbor as family would be really special...working at social centers or soup kitchens would mean your truly special.
Spot on...
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