So when does the chit-chat start? Right now!

I did warn you, that I was getting my groove back on…didn’t I? Oh how I do enjoy a good hot running engine…it keeps my oil pumping I don’t want you to worry one little bit Whaaa? If you do blow a heater hose, we can fix that with duct tape…it’s number 11 on the list

[edit on 4/1/2007 by jensouth31]

What's been happening here???? I just rode in on my camel and noticed that the fire sprinklers were going full blast!! And what looked like a dead parrot flew out!

Hmmmm...no smoke...musta detected something hot...a hot running engine you say, Jen...Whaaa, what's with the duct tape in one hand and the garter belt in the other hand??...

Oh, heck, I'll just take my drink out on the veranda.

Say, anybody else using the Google TiSP? MMMMM, these lime peanuts sure are tasty. Here, have some. Oh, don't worry, I washed my hands!

Oh those darn sprinklers! Don’t worry desert, It’s just a minor problem, Whaaa blew a heater hose, were trying to fix it with some duct tape. What color should we use? Hmmm...what color are your eyes?

Whaaa How many times do I have to tell you? Silly No, they don’t make ribbed duct tape :shk: At least as of right now they don’t!

[edit on 4/2/2007 by jensouth31]

Does anyone else think Jen and whaaa should get a room?


:shk::shk:

[edit on 2-4-2007 by Excitable_Boy]

Hey, I'm up for it!

Reminds me once when I was down in Juarez with a snootful of my old favorite, cough syrup and Cuervo, and had just met a lovely young working girl by the name of "Lupe", our arrangements and agreements were finalized and we proceeded to a room and when we walked in a huge German Shepard greeted us in a not to friendly manner. Damn he even snapped at me and almost got me, but I was to quick for him, even though I was pretty foggy. So we figured lets just wait for another room.

But I got to thinkin, what was a German Shepard doing in a room in a cathouse. I'm still puzzled; any ideas?

If it matters, the name of the place was Cherry Hill. Ever been there E_B?

Oh yeah, I was a junior in college.


[edit on 2-4-2007 by whaaa]

One tequila-two tequila-three tequila –four! Line em up bartender. Whaaa’s just starting to loosen up.

You think you're up for that whaaa? Just don't take me to any cat house, but if its cats you're into…I’ll put on my cat woman costume for ya….. meow, meow

Don't forget the duct tape, we might need to tape my tail, and whiskers back on later!

Did I ever tell you about my old neighbor…Oh My Gosh, that was the funniest thing ever…true story too. He had his wife and I laughing so hard I thought I was gonna pee my pants. Speaking of tequila, we were talking about shots of tequila, and he said “I couldn't ever remember is you were supposed to lick, suck and drink, or suck, lick and drink, or do you drink suck and lick?” Oh damn that was so funny! He was laughing so hard he could barely spit the sentence out.

Yeah what the heck was a German shepherd doing in a cat house anyway? German shepherds hate cats, trust me I know… I had a shepherd try to eat my cat once. Poor little kitty.

E-B….don’t you dare say anything flippant, or I’ll duct tape you to the wall.

I think I'll go out on the patio and chill out with desert for a few before whaaa drags me off like a cave woman, I mean a cat woman! It's a good thing I got all my long hair cut off a few months back

Desert, do you need a drink out there? How about some more of those lime peanuts?

Jen...

'scuseme, but THIS IS MY CORNER.
You'll have to head a few blocks east of me.

Oh come on dg! See what happens when you leave for a while
You're my partner in crime, and you know it! Are you sure you want to kick me out...we can have a lot of fun here

Edit ** to add

Just call me Jenny from the Block

[edit on 4/2/2007 by jensouth31]

Ok Jen. We'll share all the good looking guy$

I was just kidding. You can stay.

I couldnt think of anyone better to keep me company.

Now yer talkin sweet heart

Oh whaaa....where did you go....did we scare him off dg?

E-B….don’t you dare say anything flippant, or I’ll duct tape you to the wall.

I must say, duchess, this is hardly cordial.....hardly. What's with all this rubbish about duct tape lately anyway?

whaaa....are you talking about Cherry Hill Park? That place is fun way after dark. My friend Mary used to LOVE the merry-go-round there....

Oh, yes, E_B, they need another room! Why, this morning when I opened the buffet room door, there were whipped cream and chocolate sauce all over. And I'm still finding pieces of duct tape stuck to plates.

Hey, dg, good to see you here!

Yeah, thanks, Jen, I'll need my drink refreshed. There're more peanuts on the table in the corner.

Sigh... I've only had one tequila drink since Gulf War 1991. I distinctly remember eating dinner and consuming a pitcher of margaritas while arguing with my best friend's husband over the war, then driving the porcelain bus the rest of the night. Once you start to like tequila, you need to stop drinking it. :shk:

Oh, I forgot to tell all of you--there's free gas for all members of LN at the new LN Zippie Stop on the corner. Buster, our fry cook, says he sends over our used cooking oil, for the diesels.

Does anybody know about the upcoming Easter Egg Hunt, like when it starts? I just know that this hunt is adult only--the "eggs" are small jars of the finest caviar. What bread or crackers should I bring in my basket?

Caviar? Ooh, ain't we all fancy with our caviar. Is caviar even allowed in the LN? I thought this was a fish egg free zone??

But I digest......

I must say, when I was drinking, I LOVED Tequila!! Shots....none of those sissy Margaritas for me miss......

Tell whaaa Spiny Norman was looking for him....



[edit on 4-4-2007 by Excitable_Boy]

Spiny Norman

All right! Whose sick idea was it to put rabbit on Sunday's menu!!! You know we always serve Easter . Jeez...

Yes, E_B, we are hoighty toighty here. Don't forget, you were the first one to bring in those expensive ceegars. I keep tellin' ya...we're a classy joint here.

:w:

Nice cigars...yes, contessa. I have some wonderful Cohibas to pass around. Desert, whaaa, Jen and everyone else.....have a smoke!!

*lights everyone's cigars*

Aaaah, yes...my only vice (well, caffeine too I guess....). That's about how intense my vices are. 20 years ago, I would look at the me of today and think, "Dork!"

But, I divest....

I am a dork! Dib Dib, then...

Desert, I like to never get all that chocolate and whip cream out of my hair! That’s the last time I’m going to let Whaaa talk me into playing with chocolate syrup! He told me how fun it would be! And....Gullible me! I might be willing to make a concession for some hot fudge however, especially if he throws in some vanilla ice cream! I might even let him put a cherry on top of my sundae!

Where is Whaaa you ask? He’s in the kitchen. I duct taped him to the faucet so he could get all of that chocolate sauce off of himself Can’t ya hear him calling for help? That duct tape is amazing stuff… It’s better than shackles I tell you!

How’s that caviar? Oh… no thank you! I only eat chicken eggs! I’m not that hoighty toighty But I do agree with you desert. LN is a classy place when all the monkey business stops!

A cigar? Why yes E-B, I’d like that. Thank you! I don’t know why, but I feel like having a Bailey’s coffee tonight…anyone else?

I wonder when Dg is coming back? Maybe she's working three blocks east of me? Wouldn't that be something

Well damn, If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!

I know that's true!

Give daddy some shoe laces, a hot cup of coffee, a double pack of super glue, a big 40 of steel reserve, a Big Chief notebook, a bucket of chickin and he be happy too.

Peace

Give daddy some shoe laces, a hot cup of coffee, a double pack of super glue, a big 40 of steel reserve, a Big Chief notebook, a bucket of chickin and he be happy too.

Come on now, you left out new underwear!

Underwear?

That reminds me of once when I was down in Mazatlan, just hangin out on the beach, minding my own business when this chick comes waltzin along wrapped up in a Swedish flag. So being real friendly like, I asked her if she was wearing any panties under that flag.

Her response really took me by surprise...

She said, what do you care you squid wrestling American Twit.

You can imagine the stunned look on my face when she said that, as just earlier that afternoon I had been taking a squid wrestling lesson from Mr. Chan down in the lagoon.

Most of the time real squids were hard to reserve so we had to make do with plastic bags wrapped in knots that really didn't feel like squids, but if you used your imagination, you could almost get the idea of what a real squid would feel like.

I can tell by the glazed look on your faces that you aren't really interested in hearing the rest of the story and you just think I'm making it all up just to be entertaining.

Well you're wrong......

[edit on 7-4-2007 by whaaa]

Squid wrestling...ah yes. Brings me back to my youth. Why...where I grew up, you just weren't a man until you wrestled and killed your first squid. We're talking giant squids too....not those little pansy squids.

I grew up in Maine you see. And my father was a fisherman and my mother was a fisherman's friend. Well, anyway.....my dad would sometimes let me go fishing with his other fishy smelling friends. And occassionally they would catch one of them big squids. By that time usually everyone was pretty hammered off of cheap schnapps and Budweiser. One of the guys would always end up wrestling with the big squids.

Well, of course, one day it was my turn to wrestle with one of those slimy things. I was twelve at the time and I was hammered off of that schnapps let me tell you....say no more! The squid was bigger than me and for a while it looked like it was going to win, especially when it had my whole head in his mouth and was trying to bite my head clean off (I still have the scars to prove it).

So.....I jammed my thumbs into its squid eyes and it let go of my head. My dad pushed me out of the way and shot a flare into the thing's mouth. It took care of the squid alright, but.....it also set the boat on fire. We were about 10 miles out, so swimming for it wasn't an option.

I have to take a break. This story always brings a tear to me one brown eye.....