So when does the chit-chat start? Right now!

I believe whaaa's neighbor, Ms. E. Normous Hiney had a lot to say about our friend when I interviewd her:

here's an excerpt:

"That young feller is a hellion. Pure evil. Playin' his guitar at all hours. Having people over at all hours and playing all kinds of devil music. Scantilly clad women running around....and drinking. Lots of the devil's alcohol. Last time I was there it was 8:00 in the morning and they were drinking Bloody Mary's with asparagus in them instead of celery. Who eats asparagus at 8:00 am??"

Another neighbor had this to say:

Emma Royds knows whaaa intimately.

"I went out with whaaa on many occasions and found him a charming and erudite companion. He was wont to introduce one to eminent celebrities, celebrated American singers, members of the aristocracy and other gang leaders, who he had met through his work for charities. He took a warm interest in Boys' Clubs, Sailors' Homes, Choristers' Associations and the Grenadier Guards.

"Mind you there was nothing unusual about him. I should say not. Except, that whaaa was convinced that he was being watched by a giant hedgehog whom he referred to as 'Spiny Norman'. Normally Spiny Norman was wont to be about twelve feet from snout to tail, but when whaaa was depressed Norman could be anything up to eight hundred yards long. When Norman was about whaaa would go very quiet and start wobbling and his nose would swell up and his teeth would move about and he'd get very violent and claim that he'd laid Alec Baldwin."

Myself: "Did it worry you that when he was angry, for example, he would stitch people's legs together?

Emma: "Well it's better than bottling it up isn't it. He was a gentleman, whaaa, and what's more he knew how to treat a female impersonator."

Don't worry, Whaaa. When that interview showed up on the evening news on the LN big screen tv, I slammed down my drink, reached for the remote and turned off the tv, to save you some embarrassment, to save what little dignity you had left around here.

(E_B....... hahahahahahahaha...fall off barstool.....hahahahahaha....wipes tears from eyes....Here's the copy I made. You can show it to Mechanic and MrP etal when they drop by....still laughing......)

You can joke all you want to about Spinney Norman; that MF mean.


And I do want to thank E.Normus and Emma for those kind words.
Friends like those two sweeties are hard to find.

But my LN friends are the best. Come on, group hug!! Whoa!! Cut that out E_B.

[edit on 3-3-2007 by whaaa]

Cut what out? I can't talk to your neighbors? What has this world and the LN come to?

I'm sick I tell you....SICK!

< that's me right now, crying like a baby I'm so upset!!

Group Hug! Group Hug! Group Hug!

Hey....Dammit, Whaaa!....that is NOT Spinney Norman's snout!....now stop that!

Ooh boy, E_B, did you ever let the hedgehog out of the bag! Well, I don't like to give advice, but, I think you need to have a Spinney Norman Day at LN, to sort of make amends. You'll feel better for it; just like we all felt better after the last party here. Great food and drinks!

So how 'bout it? Order a Spinney Norman cake from your local bakery. I'll have a banner made up. The left over paper plates and cups from the last party can be transformed with a little creativity and felt tip markers.
I've got an old hedgehog purse around somewhere. I'll wrap it up and give it to Whaaa as a gift from all of us. What do you say?

E_B, do you think Whaaa really believes in SN?
You know, I used to think my ex was real, until one day I woke up and he wasn't there. Of course, Whaaa might be devastated to learn that SN is not real. I wasn't devastated to learn my ex wasn't real. He was a real SOB. Anyway, my Life got better after I got on without him. Maybe Whaaa's reputation in his neighborhood will improve. Nah, probably not.

Of course whaaa believes in Spiny Norman. Because Norman is real. I first met the hedge hog when I was tripping out on peote in the desert here in Sedona.

My friends and I parked our quads and were chillin'.....when all of a sudden this massive hedge hog dude came along and got on my friend Tony's quad. Before Tony could react, Norman was cruisin' on down the road.....

Of course, none of us wanted to give Tony a ride, so we left him there in the desert. Norman did eventully return the quad, but it had spiny quills all stuck to the seat. Tony wasn't looking and when he sat down....well, he got a big surprise. His bum ended up getting infected and he had to have most of it removed.......

Bumless Tony doesn't care for Spiny Norman......

Most folks have the wrong idea about Sr. Norman. His size puts people off most of the time and granted his spines are truely pointed and sharp but underneath his belly is spot that likes to be petted and stroked.

His eyes will roll back in his head and he sort of makes this noise that sounds like ummm, ummmm, ummmm... then...ooohhhh. Soon he regains his regal demeanor and likes nothing more than to share an asparagus on rye sandwich with a slice of nice gooda and a miller lite, with friends.

The only time I saw S. angry was when a family of rabbits questioned his patriotism and commitment to the welfare of this great country. Hidden deep down in S. is a terrible mean streak that is best left dormant.

I take my hat off to S. and his service to keep us safe from all the threats that are waiting just off the coast of Long Beach and Corpus Christi, texas. Hail to thee Sr. Norman, may your spines wave long and free. But away from the butts of humans, dogs and camels.

Join with me now as we join hands and sing "Bringing in the Sheep" in honor of our compadre and and all around good dude...Spiney Norman!!

S. just called me on his cell phone and told me that he saw his first lizard of the season and to give everyone at LN a cheery "howdy do" so....
"howdy doooooo"

[edit on 7-3-2007 by whaaa]

To Spiney Norman!
The best damned hedgehog in the Lounge!

Someone suggested I post here not sure what to post however.

Originally posted by Kacen
Someone suggested I post here not sure what to post however.

Ditto.

On second thought I'm gonna have to ask you for your ID Ladies.

Sorry Kids, this is an over 21 show where all sorts of alcohol is freely consumed with a fair amount of Mt. Dew. And adult perversion is the order of the day. I mean that in a good way!!

"Lounge Noir" has a reputation to up hold and all we need is to get popped and shut down for serving minors.

Of course, we don't mind serving miners. They work so hard after all. But, we most certainly DO NOT serve under age miners!

Whaaa...doesn't Norman like to hang out in the mines? Always playing peek-a-boo with the miners. Oh, that Spiny Norman likes to have his fun!

But seriously no kids allowed here in the Lounge Noir. We use filthy language and drink out of filthy glasses.

I just filled my pipe with . Anyone want to join me??

I’m over twenty-one, can I come in and have a drink? I try not to hang out with miners; I hope there’s not many here? The last time I did, I got this black stuff all over my white T-shirt. The shirt was never the same after that, so I had to toss it in the rag bin. Too bad, that was my lucky T-shirt. I won a few contest with that white shirt on!

I’ve been meaning to stop by this place for some time, now that my curiosity has finally got the better of me…. here I am. What goes on around this place on a Friday night? Any Karaoke? No, I’ve never sang karaoke in a bar, but one of these days I’m gonna have one too many drinks...and ya never know…I might give it a try.

Can I get a Pomegranate Martini please…shaken, not stirred

Ooooh, a Pomegranate Martini is it? Well, ain't we all la-di-da with our Pomegranate Martini.....I suppose you're gonna want that in a clean glass too....

Do we have any clean glasses? Hello? Where's the bloody dish washer? Is he outside smoking that wacky weed again?

Well....here you go Jen.....a Pomegranate Martini.....just ignore that lipstick on the rim of the glass. Drink from the other side and you'll be all set....

My new drink of choice is Monster Khaos (haven't had a Mountain dew in 2 months and 11 days.....) haven't had an alcoholic drink in 5 years, 7 months and 11 days......

So..what's everyone else drinking?

*lights up a Monte Cristo...Cuban of course....*

Jen...would you like a cigar?

Good evening all!
Is that a bouncer outside, looks a lot like Whaaa? And why are Kacen and Paresthesia still outside?
Jen, I couldn't be here for Friday night. How was the karaoke? Here's what you get as a prize, if you compete in Lounge Noir Idol

Bartender, just give me the wine bottle. I hear the glasses aren't clean this week.
E_B, don't tell Jen just to drink from the side opposite the lipstick! LN has class. That's why we have this pile of napkins. See...dip the napkin in your drink and wipe away the spot. Works every time, and the alcohol kills the germs.

E-B I’m sorry if that pomegranate martini makes you think I’m all la-di-da…after all, I can’t help it if I’m high society! And would I like a cigar? Oh My Goodness!! …. Who do you take me for…. Monica Lewinsky?

desert Let’s hit the karaoke machine hard next Friday, and thank you for that smart tip. That took the lipstick right off this dirty glass, and it’s sanitary too. I guess we can always donate that Spam to the food bank? Isn’t that right desert…

I guess I better be on my way, before the pastor of my church to drive by and see my car park out front. Oh the scandal that might cause!! You’re a nice group of people… I’ll be back

So this crazy guy grabs me in McDonalds and start with this ##it.

....There was a little red rooster that was pecking around in the barnyard and pecking at little stones and worms and seeds and then suddenly something struck the little red rooster on the head. He paniced and started in with "the sky is falling down" "the sky is falling down"!! All the other birds in the barnyard said "no it's not, you just got hit on the head with something" then all of a sudden, big blocks of ice and rocks and pieces of metal started falling from the sky and killed all the birds including the little red rooster. The sky was actually falling down.

I asked him, "why are you telling me this?" Then he looks at me with this strange drunkass look and says "cause I love you man!"

What??? Is it me? this kind of deal happens to me all the ###in time.
Sometime normal people, I have never seen in my life, tell me the most intimate details of their lives. What??

Juan, could I get Dos XX. Gracias!

Deja VieW, didn't I tell you folks about this earlier in this thread?

I hope Jen come back!! She's a wet Tshirt champion, from what I understand. I'm always in awe of real talent.


[edit on 14-3-2007 by whaaa]

Good to get back here at the end of my day. Where everybody knows your nom de plume. I think I'll start St. Paddy's Day a little early. An Irish Letterbomb, please.

Friday nights here are crazy! I'm going to cheer Jen on for the karaoke.


Whaaa and E_B will cheer wildly at her other event

Jen, don't worry, your pastor drops by once in awhile for a whiskey. Says it helps kill the germs he gets from all the handshaking on Sunday. Last time he was in, he mentioned that it would cause a scandal if you drove by and saw his car parked out front.

The guy who comes in to replace those talking urinal cakes says that LN will be treated to a special edition cake. For St. Paddy's Day, they'll play When Irish Eyes are Smiling.

"Remember your name, Man."