A taboo human instinct from a personal perspective

Originally posted by lilowl53
reply to post by chasingbrahman

 

I will defiantly check out mom's reactions when she comes later. I have lots of different baby toys here and he never shows any interest in any of them. He's lacking the grasping skill so I have to hold the toys in front of him, and then I make them work or whatever.

I read an article about a babies cries and the correlation to psychological disorders if the cry was particularly high in pitch. Have you heard of this? This baby also has a very high pitched screech of a cry,so that maybe be another tell tell sign.

At eight months old, he should definitely be beyond reaching for a toy in front of him and grabbing it. I'm searching right now to try to find any medical journals mentioning high-pitched screaming as indicative of anything abnormal. Check this article out. It runs through some types of screams and offers some information.

You mentioned that he follows you with his eyes, so despite his odd behavior around toys and people, anything on the autism spectrum can probably be ruled out. This might be an unorthodox request, and in the interest of privacy I completely understand and support you if deciding this would be a bad idea, but is there a way to post video of him? The reason I ask is, in the event someone just watching him via video gets the willies, it is definitely something in his behavior, and not something odd around him. Although I always encourage inspecting curious topics from many angles, I'd like to first address the infant and those around him before looking toward any paranormal contributors. If the cause of the discomfort is paranormal, then a video clip of him shouldn't cause any reaction in viewers. Again, I understand if you don't want to post video. I'm just trying to figure out ways to isolate potential causes.

reply to post by chasingbrahman


While I definitely agree to give more grounds to the science than the paranormal, I can speak from personal experience that the video argument is not necessarily true, just most likely so. It would depend on the the strength of the aura/presence/what have you. If something is strong enough, it can carry through photographs or videos in a muted form, although I'll admit that I've only ever had this sort of thing happen with large locations as opposed to individuals (and my personal experience does not have the benefit of ever having been done in a blind/scientific manner, so there is also that).

I don't have any video or the capabilities to take any at the moment but I can provide a recent picture of him.

So... for the purposes of science and such... here he is...

This is quite a cute baby. Now I'm wondering if there are other issues going on. Human psychology is funny. I don't think it is that unusual for mothers to reject their children for any number of reasons. Sometimes it is only a phase that they go through, sometimes not.

I'm wondering if people's attitudes to this child, who doesn't seem in any way odd or abnormal to me, on the contrary, quite cute, are being colored by the mother's attitude.

Some children are very old souls who might seem unresponsive or uncommunicative, but are really undemonstrative or actually highly receptive but in an internalized sort of way.

Barring some diagnosis from a competent pediatrician, I think patience and optimism are what the situation calls for. The baby is cute.

reply to post by ipsedixit


Agreed, I defiantly don't think it's ugly duckling syndrome.

Maybe some here can read Auras?

Babies and children creep me out.
I want none of it.
Maybe i'm one of these without a soul.

If it concerns you that much, don't sit for it, tell the mother she needs to look after it. That baby is going to be a confused child and probably have a large disconnection with it's mother when it's older.

Sorry for all the "it's" but I don't know it's gender.

Originally posted by lilowl53
reply to post by ipsedixit

 

Agreed, I defiantly don't think it's ugly duckling syndrome.

Maybe some here can read Auras?

If it's not a violation of any kind. What is the possibility of posting a small head photo of the child after the next time you sit for him. With no identifying information of course. Those of us who can do *viewing* may be able to add to the discussion.

NEVERMIND...you already did....that's what I get for not scrolling up....



Des

reply to post by lilowl53

He's a cute baby,just from looking at the photo.He certainly has a very intense,focused look in his eyes,very aware.My 5year old son is like that,from just the age of a few weeks,when you took a photo of him,he would FOCUS,and such a direct,aware look in each photo.But the difference is,my son is loved by everybody,people have always felt drawn to him,and notice him.When im in a shop or mall,and i see some-one looking our way with a soppy/bemused/friendly smile,to be sure,i look at him+he's beaming back at him.People have approached him,just to touch him,or to say hi,etc.He's also not shy to just wave at some-one strange,and smile.But even if he does nothing,people still notice him,and he seems to just elicit a happy grin or a joke or friendly words from strangers.Like he emits some kind of positive "radiation",almost.Seems the exact opposite of this l'il dude..Geez,i feel sorry for him,because if he is not evil,he's gonna have a tougher ride than most.

I wonder,maybe there are negative Entity (ies) attached,or indwelling..seems such a shame,he is actually really a good-looking child,maybe the awareness in his eyes,the intensity,plays a part in making people feel uncomfortable around him.

Well,its to the good that you will be with him often.My advice,treat him as normally as possible,as i believe you are doing anyway.But give him lots of hugs and positive reinforcement,tell him how much you enjoy having him with you,and try to mean it.As he gets older,maybe you will be to him,some-one he can open up to,as he gets older,and learn to verbalise feelings.Sooner or later he's gonna start noticing that he "spooks the herd"-that is a lonely place,and often causes anger and resentment and bitterness to fester-it will be to the best outcome if he has some-one to trust,if maybe he ever needs to talk.

I was friendly with a Russian girl on another site,she once posted a photo of an "evil boy" whom she used to babysit.Beautiful boy,also enormous,VERY striking eyes.He could be very loving and genuinely affectionate at times,other times creepy,egotistical,destructive,etc,an said things like: "I know my parents asked you to help them with me,but i don't want you to" Creepy stuff like that,and definitely a real l'il terror,sometimes.Strange world.

the way you all seem to judge people strictly based on how they look is kind of disheartening.

Originally posted by ipsedixit
This is quite a cute baby. Now I'm wondering if there are other issues going on. Human psychology is funny. I don't think it is that unusual for mothers to reject their children for any number of reasons. Sometimes it is only a phase that they go through, sometimes not.

I'm wondering if people's attitudes to this child, who doesn't seem in any way odd or abnormal to me, on the contrary, quite cute, are being colored by the mother's attitude.

Some children are very old souls who might seem unresponsive or uncommunicative, but are really undemonstrative or actually highly receptive but in an internalized sort of way.

Barring some diagnosis from a competent pediatrician, I think patience and optimism are what the situation calls for. The baby is cute.

LOL...I'm picking up very very old Soul...also very stubborn. He's incredibly sharp. And slightly indifferent to those around him. He'll need a lot of consistent guidance to temper his indifference, and help him bond with empathy.

Des

Based on the image, I think he's just got an unusually intense look about him. It kind of harshly tempers the adorable look, but I'm not seeing any indication you've got anything to worry about. Because he's so sharply alert and intense, he might be creating a sort of psuedo-uncanny valley effect for you, though?

reply to post by chasingbrahman


So his mom came to pick him up... my youngest (16 months) wason the floor playing with me and the little boy. She walked right over to my child and picked him up. She started saying stuff like "you're so cute" and "do you want to come home with me?". After 10 minutes I finally had to basically hand her her baby! I never noticed it before but she has done this before.

I really think the weirdness that I feel from him is not because of his looks at all. Maybe it is his intensity that weirds me out. When I look at the photos I have of him, I don't get that feeling, it's really only in person that it happens.

reply to post by lilowl53

That intensity could be good thing,later in life-i get the feeling from the pic that this is an intelligent l'il chap.As he gets older (if you are prepared to go on baby-sitting him) give him a drawing-book and crayons.let him express himself like that.See what comes out of his mind and imagination.Btw,do you have animals,and if you allow your cats/dogs to interact with the little ones,how do they react to him,in comparison with how they react to other small kiddies?

Originally posted by lilowl53
reply to post by chasingbrahman

 

So his mom came to pick him up... my youngest (16 months) wason the floor playing with me and the little boy. She walked right over to my child and picked him up. She started saying stuff like "you're so cute" and "do you want to come home with me?". After 10 minutes I finally had to basically hand her her baby! I never noticed it before but she has done this before.

I really think the weirdness that I feel from him is not because of his looks at all. Maybe it is his intensity that weirds me out. When I look at the photos I have of him, I don't get that feeling, it's really only in person that it happens.

That's a crying shame she acts that way around him. He's really very bright, and not immune to what she is putting out.

Based on being able to see his photo...I *feel* no evilness emanating from him. Just that stubborn indifference, that I associate with incredible intelligence. I think his mother is intimidated by him...she's not aware of what it is she's feeling.

So she does distance herself because of it....she could be learning so much from him even at this age. She may only feel comfortable around not so old souls...IDK.

I'm so glad you started this thread.

Des

reply to post by Raxoxane


We have a dog, she is very protective and loyal. She licks faces and hands, but she leaves this baby alone. Most of the time when I have him, she will stay outside. I have birds as well, but they are not usually in the same room. The dog doesn't growl or anything so nothing there stands out.

reply to post by Destinyone


I think you are on to something for sure. When she did finally take him she talked to him but then passed him to her older daughter. Maybe she hasn't bonded with him yet...I am really not sure. I intentionally read her body language and payed close attention to what she did. Her interaction was minimal at best.

I hope he does turn out to be very intelligent, we need more like that around here! I assume I will be keeping him for a few more years so I can't wait till he can really get up and start interacting more, it will be interesting to see how his personality comes out.

Originally posted by lilowl53
reply to post by Destinyone

 

I think you are on to something for sure. When she did finally take him she talked to him but then passed him to her older daughter. Maybe she hasn't bonded with him yet...I am really not sure. I intentionally read her body language and payed close attention to what she did. Her interaction was minimal at best.

I hope he does turn out to be very intelligent, we need more like that around here! I assume I will be keeping him for a few more years so I can't wait till he can really get up and start interacting more, it will be interesting to see how his personality comes out.

You will need to challenge him, so he doesn't spend so much time challenging you, due to boredom.

He's lucky to have your interest in getting to know him, and showing him what caring feels like.

Des

I'm a little alarmed at the behavior of the mother of the baby. There is a limit to what parents can get away with in dealing with their children. Sooner or later a child comes to a time when after accepting everything unconditionally from a parent it will reach an age of judgement when it will know if it is being treated properly or not.

If a parent cannot be bothered to extend the minimal level of common courtesy to their own child that they would give to a stranger in the street, they are asking for serious difficulties at some point down the road.

Shunning and witholding affection from an eight month old child is not right, no matter how the child behaves. This mother needs to get real. She's not living a scene out of "Rosemary's Baby".

I'm asking myself if this mother is a fit mother.

reply to post by lilowl53


He's a little darling! I feel no aversion to him looking at him, though I feel something, I'm not sure what that is, but I think that might be a psychological thing because of the aversion others have felt.
Hey, if no-one else wants him, I'll have him I can't have any more kids anyway, and I'll take care of this little guy

I think I remember you saying he has older brothers and sisters?
His behaviour may be a case of 'Lazy Baby'. I've seen in the youngest children of friends of mine, that when they have older siblings, they youngest can either be sharp as a tack and start doing things really quickly, like sitting unsupported, their speech develops quicker, they walk quicker, because they are influenced by their siblings. On the other hand, the youngest can be lazy, and not even bother to start sitting or crawling until well after a year old, not hold or 'play' with objects or toys because their silbings can do these things for them, or even eat solid food!
However, people have mistaken austism for lazy baby syndrome (it's not really a syndrome, just a technical name for a lazy bubba!) so I think it would be best to keep an eye on little mans development, because no doubt, the mother won't since she spends so little time with him anyway.

Do you have contact with the other sitters? It might be worth sitting down together and discussing the situation, discussing the observations you have made about the little one and determine what the best action would be for him, because he really can't continue to be passed off to everyone else, it's neglectful on his mothers part, and you have your own families to care for.

reply to post by Lulzaroonie


He has an older sister, she is 12 or 13 I think. The kicker with her is that she lives with her dad full time, so right there might be a hint. The babies mom works overnights three times a week, the days change but she of course has to sleep sometime. The funny thing about it is I am the sitter that gets him the days she isn't working or sleeping. I understand needing to run errands and such, but I have always just taken my kids with me. I never ship them off when I need to clean the house or go to the store so it's weird to me.(I can't complain, she pays me) He isn't even a needy baby, he just hangs out quietly so even when I have him I still manage to do household work at the same time. Maybe it's more lazy mom syndrome?

I don't think it's postpartum depression on her part, she still manages to get in the bath and do her hair and make-up. I'm starting to think the baby is more of just an inconvenience to her already establish routine. He was not planned or expected. As far as his development goes, I mentioned earlier that he was behind by a ways as far as what he should be doing at this point. That could be due to any number of things. He isn't the most underdeveloped baby I have ever kept. I used to watch a 1 year old girl who still laid flat on her back, so much so that her head was flat, she eventually caught up and is actually a pretty sweet little girl, so there is hope that he will catch up as well. Even with her problems I never felt that "turned off" feeling towards her.

The other sitters. One is a friend of the father's, she has 6 daughters of her own so I am willing to bet he gets played with when he is there, as a baby doll. A couple of weeks ago when he was with her, she propped him up in a seat that was on her kitchen table with out strapping him in and he feel out onto the floor. He had a goose egg from that, and she felt really badly about it. Accidents happen but I cannot help but wonder if she just kind of sticks him where ever and just ignores him... you know? The 2nd sitter is his Grandma. She is a few crayons short of a full box if you get my meaning. I wouldn't let her watch my dog, but this is who the baby spends the most overnights with. To my knowledge she hasn't dropped him or had any accidents with him other than putting wrong medicine on his diaper rash. She drops him off to me on Tuesdays and she just about runs back to her car, lol! She had him from Friday night to Tuesday morning... yea... My mom wouldn't do that for me if I payed her a million dollars!
The whole this is so weird and frustrating, I feel like the only sane person in this kids life!