What Headline would you most like to see on the front page of your newspaper?

There are several headlines I would like to see:
Ron Paul wins election
Economic crisis over, FEMA camps closed
NWO conspirators arrested, executed
Abortion officially made illegal
Obama impeached
Biochip implants outlawed
Creation now taught in schools
evolution no longer taught in schools
creation proven
evolution debunked
Area 51 truth revealed
Bin Laden found
homework outlawed
Guns allowed, 2nd amendment debate resolved
nations disarm nuclear warheads
FEMA goes out of buisness
More power given to states, people
North American Union plan shot
NATO out of buisness
Gay marriage made illegal
9/11 conspirators arrested, executed
loch nessmonster proven to exist
God proven to exist

"9/11 a hoax! Twin Towers still stand!"

That would catch my attentions

How about...
USA recognises that other countries have citizens of some worth too!

Elvis Presley alive! really and an Alien! and pregnat with President Obama's child !

Ronald Regan walks again...as a zombie !!

Mikhail Gorbachev gets sex change, finds new earth cult

Piano falls on Henry Kissinger ... world peace declared !!

real sorry I hope some found this assuming

OBAMA CALLS OUT MONSANTO GM SEEDS
AND THE USE OF FLUORIDE IN TAP WATER.

DEMANDS IMMEDIATE DISCONTINUATION OF SEEDS UNTIL FURTHER TESTING. DEMANDS REMOVAL OF FLUORIDE FROM ALL CITY/STATE WATER SOURCES.

reply to post by spinkyboo


unfortunately, I think there's a greater chance of my headlines all happening.. too bad !

"MATRIX TO BE SWITCHED OFF AT MIDNIGHT"

or one I'd really like to see:

"PERSONAL SPACE TRANSPORT NOW A REALITY"

or maybe:

"FREE LIGHT SABRES FOR EVERYONE"

Best of all:

"WORK ABOLISHED."

[edit on 2/3/2009 by MarrsAttax]

I have one more -

WHO IS JOHN GALT?

I'd like to see that - and all it implys.
It's the only sane response to Obama's first 6 week of damage done.

Jesus receives irreversible brain damage as his return in a gas guzzling chevy is met by hordes of organic bean throwing green peace protestors.

OBAMA BENDS OVER AND TATTOO TRAMP STAMP WITH THE WORD 'LUCIFER' SEEN ON HIS LOWER BACK ABOVE BUTTT CRACK

[edit on 2-3-2009 by johnny2127]

reply to post by johnny2127


umm.... "ANNA NICOLE SMITH CONTACTS JOHN EDWARDS - REQUESTS 3SOME WITH HIM AND ANOTHER FEMALE GHOST"

interesting concept...

Dave

Any new headline ideas?

Here is my new one:

"US GOVT DECLARES BANKRUPTCY, RESTRUCTURING ALL DEBT AND RECEIVABLES"

"PUBLIC EXECUTIONS to be held on the Washington Mall grounds this Friday for those involved in the world financial meltdown" BBQ party afterwords on The White House lawn.

CATS BREAK SILENCE, ADMIT THEY ARE INTELLIGENT, EVIL AND BEHIND THE FINANCIAL MELTDOWN

GORDON BROWN FALLS FROM HELICOPTER!

The helicopter had yet to take off, 6 or 7 well built guys dressed in black picked up the PM, bundled him back in, waited for the helicopter to reach apx 2,000 feet before again allowing the PM to reach terminal velocity.

REPUBLICAN PARTY DISSOLVED!

Washington. GOP leaders agree that the Republican party is dead and so they agree to dissolve the political party. Most conservatives switch to Green Party.

In other news, Rush Limbaugh flees America to Argentina.

[atsimg]http://files.abovetopsecret.com/images/member/5529de0b3f0a.jpg[/atsimg]

BILDERBERGERS FOUND DEAD ACROSS GLOBE

~Reuters

Montreal. 24/7/2009
By Paul Revere.

"In what has been described by authorities as possibly the most sophisticated and articulate assassinations in modern history, the bodies of over two thousand individuals involved or affiliated with an alleged Elite think-tank called Bilderberger have been discovered this morning across the western world.

FBI spokesperson Michael Collins revealed chilling details at a press conference earlier today, citing that all two thousand of the deceased were apparently killed within a three minute period across the globe, at approx 5:00 AM EST. Members of the organization were said to be leading political figures media moguls and corporate bankers, with strange ties to an occult ring
refereed to as Lucifarians, or Illuminati.

Mr. Collins has denied that Al Qaeda had any part in the killings, suggesting that those responsible were from a yet unknown but the highly organized group given the slayings were clearly of a paramilitary nature, and had chillingly accurate intelligence of their victims precise locations.

CIA chief Ronald McDonald
said the murders were "Deeply disturbing", and the ramifications would leave a massive power vacuum across the planet as Nation states began to assess their losses and find new order."

[edit on 9-6-2009 by Trunkeight]

[edit on 9-6-2009 by Trunkeight]