A male backlash against #MeToo is brewing

a reply to: Krakatoa

Your anecdotal speaking to "real women" does not change the shameful history of men abusing women. Nor does it change the numbers. Again, the number of raped, abused, and molested women is uncountable compared to the few dudes that get accused of such crimes that didn't commit them. I accept this collateral damage for the greater good. You want to use these very few instances to keep women down, keep women fearful of speaking out, & keep men in their safe space. You don't get to decide how women speak out.

You want to call it a "weapon" the same way that Netanyahu points to 2 dead Israelis and then kills 500+ Palestinians.
The true problem is what matters most.

originally posted by: nightbringr
So you think is perfectly OK for a man's life to be ruined due to false claims?

Who said I was? I don't want any person's life ruined, but if a person makes false allegations against another they have legal recourse to address those charges and potentially have the accuser prosecuted if the claims are indeed false.

I bet you'd think quite differently if your son was outed as a sexual predator for hitting on the wrong girl and as a result his life was ruined.

You dont get accused of being a sexual predator for hitting on one person. You get accused of being a sexual predator when you get accused by MULTIPLE people of gross misconduct.

originally posted by: okrian
a reply to: Krakatoa

Your anecdotal speaking to "real women" does not change the shameful history of men abusing women. Nor does it change the numbers. Again, the number of raped, abused, and molested women is uncountable compared to the few dudes that get accused of such crimes that didn't commit them. I accept this collateral damage for the greater good. You want to use these very few instances to keep women down, keep women fearful of speaking out, & keep men in their safe space. You don't get to decide how women speak out.

You want to call it a "weapon" the same way that Netanyahu points to 2 dead Israelis and then kills 500+ Palestinians.
The true problem is what matters most.

And there you have it folks. This member cares nothing about you, only that "men" get punished whether they did anything or not. Pure man hating, admitted as such.

Well, don't think I for one will sit idly by while the likes of people such as yourself run roughshod over peoples rights so you can feel good about yourself.

a reply to: mobiusmale

If men are too afraid to have private meetings with women, or to travel on business with them, or to be in close proximity to them...for fear of having their careers/lives ruined by an allegation/claim...this is going to limit opportunities for women professionally

I don't necessarily see it that way. It would limit interactions to public, open door type interactions; private meetings aren't really a necessary thing these days. In fact I'd think they would be discouraged in this age of "inclusiveness" and "diversity". "Private" meetings smack of elitism.

originally posted by: Krakatoa

And there you have it folks. This member cares nothing about you, only that "men" get punished whether they did anything or not. Pure man hating, admitted as such.

Well, don't think I for one will sit idly by while the likes of people such as yourself run roughshod over peoples rights so you can feel good about yourself.

Well obviously I said none of that. Nice false interpretation of everything I've been saying. No wonder you are all worked up.
"Man hating". Ha! Jesus dude, you really are scared of this movement aren't you.

I am a male and I don't see this as a backlash. This is just common sense to limit the chance for a situation to be abused. Women also should embrace work being done in the open with a witness to ensure fairness. When someone feels that they could be attacked, they will do defensive measures to protect themselves. The author seems to think this will hurt women. I see this as just another cost of doing business.

originally posted by: okrian

originally posted by: Krakatoa

And there you have it folks. This member cares nothing about you, only that "men" get punished whether they did anything or not. Pure man hating, admitted as such.

Well, don't think I for one will sit idly by while the likes of people such as yourself run roughshod over peoples rights so you can feel good about yourself.

Well obviously I said none of that. Nice false interpretation of everything I've been saying. No wonder you are all worked up.
"Man hating". Ha! Jesus dude, you really are scared of this movement aren't you.

Are you really trying to say you didn't say this in the context of this topic?

I accept this collateral damage for the greater good. You want to use these very few instances to keep women down, keep women fearful of speaking out, & keep men in their safe space. You don't get to decide how women speak out.

Where in your entire post do you allow for PEOPLE to be victims? No, you only refer to women, and want to charge men today with the crimes of the past. Whether they did anything or not, you are willing to accept a man being falsely accused, go to jail, be fired from a job, be publicly ostracized. You said this, nobody else.

You clearly are more upset at people expecting due process over baseless accusations, for what? Revenge?

No thanks. I rail against witch trials, not due process. If someone did something like rape or assault a person, then they should be judged accordingly in a court of law. NOT in the court of public opinion.

THAT is what is upsetting here. But you seem to want and even advocate for that public opinion and mob rule.

Please, if I misunderstood, explain why in detail, I am misunderstanding your position.

originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus

originally posted by: nightbringr
Currently, one can go to CNN, claim they were abused, and without any due process, the media can then smear your name about, assuring that you are fired or worse.

Is someone preventing those people from filing false accusation charges against the accusers?

That's the other part that people rarely talk about. If the accusations really are false, the accused can always press charges or take it to civil court for restitution. Slander and libel laws are tailor made for situations where lies have the potential to irreparably damage a person's social or legal standing.

Instead, many of the accused are flat out admitting that they did do what they were accused of doing (like Mario Batali). And others pay huge settlements specifically so they don't have to admit guilt (like O'Reilly's alleged $32 million settlement to a single person). If someone really feels like they're being unfairly smeared or accused of something that they didn't commit, they should fight it in court & seek due process.

originally posted by: mobiusmale
this is going to limit opportunities for women professionally - which is certainly going to be an unintended consequence of what is happening right now with the #metoo movement.

Women are now in a position to create their own opportunities.

I think the whole point of the #metoo and #timesup movements is just that.

Women now feel free, for the first time, to tell men what they have been "thinking" all along, but "suppressed" because of fear that they'd lose some opportunity that depended on men to provide for them.

Looking at Oprah, one wonders which man she depended on to become a billionaire. She seems to have done it all on her own, and at a time when it was more difficult for women to strike out on their own than it is today.

So, that's the #timesup.

What has not been said, in this new environment of "speaking out", is what men have been thinking, but suppressing, about women, in the interactions between the sexes.

Men are fully aware that women have always used their "sexuality" as a tool to control men, but no man has come forward to "complain" about this, because, well, men were the dominant species. Or, so they thought.

One of the things woman are totally unaware of, is that men think that women are "liars" and "dishonest", and this is the main reason that women are not allowed to be members of secret orders like Freemasons. These fraternities require good and honest men of high moral values to sit among them. Women cannot qualify, because men "think" the woman is by nature a deceiver. She spends hours in front the mirror putting on a "fake face" to fool the men that she is more beautiful and desirable than she really is, while underneath she is just ugly.

Men have never told women this, because everyone is accustomed to the "old order", where we all play a role, with many things left "unspoken" for "politeness."

Now that "system" is over, the #timesup, and men and women will begin to reveal what they really think of each other, and it ain't pleasant on either side.

Talk about playing the victim card, lol.

Innocent before proven guilty is said time and time again when it comes to men accused of sexual assault/misconduct, then the same people go on to discuss living in safe spaces where no girls are allowed because they're assuming every woman is guilty in their entirely fabricated accusation of sexual misconduct.

Keep on crying, join in on the #meninist movement, they need more crying boys.

originally posted by: enlightenedservant
If the accusations really are false, the accused can always press charges or take it to civil court for restitution.

Weinslime said he would but looks like nothing will come of that.

a reply to: bigfatfurrytexan

Smart decision. As a male retired teacher, I would never reprimand a female or male student in private. I would always call them out into the hallway where hallway video cameras would record everything. Teenagers can easily make things up just because they didn't like a particular teacher. They sure do lie a lot to their parents when they get into trouble, lol. I sometimes wished they had video cameras in the classroom. If a student caused disruptions or became disrespectful, the video would be undeniable proof for their parents!

Maybe more businesses should employ video cameras in their workplace?

originally posted by: Painterz

originally posted by: CulturalResilience
You can't expect the modern feminist to behave logically and think about consequences of its actions. It is shrieking childlike brat beast that expects it's every whim to be instantly indulged. As is being proved on a daily basis, giving power to the childish and childlike is a high risk strategy for any society, and it never ends well.

Or have you just taken your opinion from far-right misogynistic anti-woman sources that have taught you that all 'feminists' are extremists who believe nonsense like 'all men are rapists'?

I assure you, what you have been told is feminism, is not feminism.

But, apparently according to you, all those that think this is going too far are rapists.

It's usually folks with that sort of terrible logic, like yourself, that helps paint the picture Cultural Resilience touched on. Not the media.

I know that I have AT LEAST 4 MeToo's of a physical "personal" nature in the first 18 months of college and maybe 6-7 total. Girls just use different tools instead of phsical force such as lies, manipulation, blackmailing and other stuff. I even had a sister of a super serious (basically engaged) GF go around telling anyone that knew me that she and I had sex (many times) even while I was with my GF. She said it in front of me and I was a state of shock and had no idea how to respond to it other than to tell her she was crazy.

then there were the girls who would drag you onto the dance floor, put hands down your pants and maybe pull you outside of the bar/club all because they knew their boyfriend was going to be picking them up or was waiting outside. They'd act all drunk and innocent, some claiming that they though I was their boyfriend and blame me for the whole incident.

Girls will get involved with a guy after she has a bad breakup and then either have the new BF beat up the old one or vice versa all to show control or to hurt one or many parties.

Had my GF's neighbor/team mate/ best friend attack me with a knife after telling my girlfriend that she had been groping me at a dance party and then stripped to change clothing and underwear in my room (didn't know she was doing that, but I couldn't leave here in there alone) and "modeled" for me while basically asking for sex. I had to give her a ride back to her apt (was staying with GF that night) and when I got there (the ride there was full of busy hands being smacked away and offers of road h3@f). This really made me worry how my GF acted when she went out if her friends did this. When I got to my GF's apt I told her basically what happened buy just said that she came onto me and flashed me and tried to kiss me. Well It got turned around into something that I must of had to have done and she finally called to confront her. 2 mins later I hear stomping down the balcony between apartments and then there is the girl demanding to talk to me. When I got to the door she told me she hated me and pulled a kitchen knife from behind her back and tried to stab me, over and over - probably about 50+ times. I use the door as a shield and got it closed and she continued to stab that and the door jamb chopping it all up. She was yelling that she was going to kill me, hated me, etc. This chick only had a few drinks that night (we were at my house party for only an hour) so she couldn't be that drunk. She actually damaged the jamb and door a good bit. The police finally came (after 75 minutes and we were only 1200 yards from the police department and a TON of cops in the college town) and she was taken to a psych ward for a couple nights and then returned back with no word heard about charges (POLICE FILED NONE!!! she only had to pay for fixing door frame& door). I know guys who got like 3-4 charges for raising their voices at girlfriends. We eventually became friends again but it was a really odd night and following month.

I was accused of harassing a girl in 6th grade (she was 5th grader) and a list of phrases and words were presented to me and they said they knew I had been saying this to little suzie sweetheart. I looked at them and I had NO idea what they meant and would never been able to think of those types of things to say at that age. I didn't have parents who used profanity nor could see movies above PG at that age, so I was a virgin when it came to those kinds of insults. I can say that that may have been one of the most embarrassing things I've been through, being accused in front of my parents, principle by a music teacher who took the girls word (he later ran off with a student 34 years younger than he). I would admit that we had vulgar banter back and forth but it was like vanilla swearing (like toddlers learning to swear on my part but she had an advanced degree to say the least).

There are so many stories like mine above by other guys I know, many are work related,That I wuld like to write to get out in the public but I'm afraid that it would be detrimental to my mental health and possibly spark violence in people who are already fed up with the female sob stories where they are always perfect angels (my sister and cousins still have my family fooled with this.

originally posted by: Painterz

originally posted by: CulturalResilience
a reply to: Painterz

I speak as I find, as aposed to parroting groupthink and boilerplate.

Well then, you might want to go and talk to some actual real feminists then. Instead of the imaginary feminists you're reading about on the internet. You might find it quite enlightening.

Feminism speaks for itself and what it is about is apparent. Modern feminism is not about equality. To think it is shows the level of thought you've put in to it and speaks volumes about where your head is at.

originally posted by: RomeByFire
Talk about playing the victim card, lol.

Innocent before proven guilty is said time and time again when it comes to men accused of sexual assault/misconduct, then the same people go on to discuss living in safe spaces where no girls are allowed because they're assuming every woman is guilty in their entirely fabricated accusation of sexual misconduct.

Keep on crying, join in on the #meninist movement, they need more crying boys.

Well, there's a misandrist right there!
Don't think that just because you can get away with your hatred right now that you will be allowed to forever. The backlash is real.

a reply to: Painterz



Then real feminists should maybe start calling out these wackadoodles.

originally posted by: okrian

originally posted by: Krakatoa

And there you have it folks. This member cares nothing about you, only that "men" get punished whether they did anything or not. Pure man hating, admitted as such.

Well, don't think I for one will sit idly by while the likes of people such as yourself run roughshod over peoples rights so you can feel good about yourself.

Well obviously I said none of that. Nice false interpretation of everything I've been saying. No wonder you are all worked up.
"Man hating". Ha! Jesus dude, you really are scared of this movement aren't you.

It's hardly a "movement". It's a pitiful hashtag.
And all of those with any sense, men and women alike, see how pathetic it is.

a reply to: ItCameFromOuterSpace

Which branch of feminism? There are multiple feminism ideologies, some looking completely different in practice. "Feminism" is an umbrella term like "pacifism", meaning that neither term has any meaning unless you clarify which version you're talking about.

There are definitely feminists who want women to have equal rights, opportunities, and responsibilities as males. But there are also definitely some feminists who are actually anti-male, being the female equivalents of chauvinists. Some feminists believe that women shouldn't have to keep concealing or "belittling" their femininity, while others believe the exact opposite, that women should be judged by their merits and capabilities instead of their femininity. There's no single version.

(I liken it to pacifism because some "pacifists" believe in no aggression or violence whatsoever. But others, like myself, only believe in violence or aggression during self defense. And others believe in all forms of aggression except outright violence, such as sanctions, sabotage, etc.)

ETA: Here's a simplified list of feminism ideologies on wikipedia to get the point across (HERE).

The movement has gotten completely out of hand, extending far beyond normal confines of a useful, meaningful one. It has become a witch hunt, a manipulative means to gain an advantage, a means to destroy who pisses you off with little more than a finger point & a screech.

I do not support MeToo, I want it to DIAF yesterday. I refuse to help ostracize and subjugate innocent people over backstabbing, malicious accusations with little to no proof and self-centeredness. That is what COURT is for, you prove your claims in it. All this movement is at face value is wanton unproven slander with a jacked up flamethrower.
F# feminism and feminists as a whole, you are crippling the rest of us sensible women for decades to come with poor, knee-jerk judgement today.

We need a middle finger icon.