reply to post by wutdouthink
The short answer: The reason why you are seeing a pattern is because you are most likely trying to get the same type of people to "like" you, instead
of letting the process happen naturally. By not fighting, and not losing hope, you should meet a couple people that will become friends eventually
(just for your info, all those people on facebook that have 500-1000 friends? Bet the person only communicates with 5 percent of them). And, friends
are usually those that like the same topics as yourself.
Something like this, yeah. Fossilera - I like your last sentence.
I feel for the O.P., though. I am fairly certain she hits on the autistic spectrum. There are differences between autistic males and autistic females,
and the autistic male has been studied the most.
For me, there is a big difference in how I view the world - it is like the difference between cats and dogs. A friend for me is someone who I can hang
out with and do things with -
Phrases like "letting the process happen naturally" don't work for me, because the "natural process" as it is for me appears to others as "unnatural."
So your post basically advises, from my perspective, that I take an unnatural process towards socialization.
And for me, friends that like the same topics - well, I dislike dinner parties and the like. I have the most success hanging out with people and
having things we do in common. It has to do with my wiring - and it is depressing that it cannot easily be changed.
What is even more depressing is that acting in a way that lets me be accepted by society actually involves denying myself. Our society has a long way
to progress in the way it treats and integrates people with autism of both genders, and the rates of children with autism is only increasing every
Females with autism are able to function in society differently than males in a lot of cases - but experience stress, and their chameleon-like
abilities due to differing neurological and social structures than guys often make them go un-diagnosed.
As a guy with autism, I don't even know what to say. There are a # ton of challenges out there, many of them not easily achievable. The only way I've
found to make friends having autism as a guy is by letting people use me or by giving people what they want, but that gets very draining, and there
are some "good" people out there who appreciate it, but a lot of "bad" people who don't -
And being a "brain wiring" problem - well, that makes it hard, because what others see as "unnatural" is entirely "natural" to someone with autism -
and yeah. Besides that, a lot of autistic people are pretty cool until they enter society and start getting roughed around, and that adds on negative
bits and pieces like paranoia and anxiety and makes things worse for their personalities.
Oh, on a conspiratorial note - autistics have traditionally found a place in our society and even gotten married to other autistics, but I think that
the Information Age has caused so much chaos (as in non-linear movement) that it makes lives particularly hard for autistics these days, if not
edit on 31amTue, 31 Dec 2013 01:19:54 -0600kbamkAmerica/Chicago by darkbake because: (no reason given)