Women don't like quiet males. (They prefer alpha males who are all bullies)

Originally posted by Angle

Originally posted by smyleegrl

Originally posted by Jepic
I find people that say "confidence is everything" to be quite superficial. To any genuine relationship worthy person, confidence should not even be a factor. What really matters is personality, character, and views on life. And of course physical appearance.

If you know people that reject other people because they are not confident, be assured they obviously didn't care about you in the first place.

Physical appearance is more important than self-confidence?

Naaaaah.

Ok, that is your opinion, or were you the voice of every female, which in fact could've been. Those speaking the truth and those lying actually.

There's also the fact that not all see the same in a person at once, like with Jesus, the world did not recognise Him. Quiet males, as mentioned by previous poster, are confident in the fact others just don't recognise.

Speaking for myself.

Physical attractiveness isn't that important to me. Sure, it's great to be attracted to your mate. But I'll take confidence, kindness, humor, reliability, honor, and moral code over physical beauty any day. After all, our looks fade but our character hopefully remains the same.

reply to post by smyleegrl


Ok, ok, but don't get overconfident now.

What did I say??

reply to post by fadedface


You do realise the quiet ones are the alphas, do you?

Don't try to figure them woman out

Originally posted by Angle
reply to post by smyleegrl

 

Ok, ok, but don't get overconfident now.

What did I say??

You crack me up and I'm not sure why. But don't worry, it's a good thing.

reply to post by smyleegrl


Makes me a smyleeboy.

Spiritual pleasures

Originally posted by Jepic
I find people that say "confidence is everything" to be quite superficial. To any genuine relationship worthy person, confidence should not even be a factor. What really matters is personality, character, and views on life. And of course physical appearance.

If you know people that reject other people because they are not confident, be assured they obviously didn't care about you in the first place. If you care about confidence, you really only care about who other people will see you around with.

"Confidence"... Such a pointless quality when it comes to LOVE.

Confidence has nothing to do with the ability to love something or someone.

CHECK YOSELF! REALITY CHECK!

edit on 21/5/13 by Jepic because: (no reason given)

Wrong if you have no confidence in yourself your personality, character and views on life are well, going to pretty much suck. Physical attractiveness will only get you so far before all your other shortcomings start coming into play. Face it if you are not confident in who you are, no one else is going to want to be with you. There is a reason pity parties are a solitary affair.

reply to post by KeliOnyx


Ok, and confidence is so easy to gain with just a few kind words of others.

Oneliners 'till banned.

reply to post by Angle


It doesn't really work that way. Yes people can help one to become more confident, but depending on someone else to bring you from 0 just isn't gonna happen. The reality of it is this, the so-called "nice guys", you know the ones always whining and complaining girls don't like them. Have only themselves to blame for their circumstances. They talk themselves out of dating before they have even said hello to the girl. No one can help you with that. If you want to go down that road than expect to not date very often.

Quit trying to be the knight in perpetually shining your armor waiting for your moment. Instead go out get it battered and dented looking for your moment. You gain confidence by doing what you thought you couldn't do before. Even when you fail you learn at the very least not what to do the next time. The real Alpha male is the one that doesn't quit trying or learning.

Originally posted by KeliOnyx
reply to post by Angle

 

It doesn't really work that way. Yes people can help one to become more confident, but depending on someone else to bring you from 0 just isn't gonna happen.

Thank you for being human, offcourse, this was sarcastic to the bone.

The reality of it is this, the so-called "nice guys", you know the ones always whining and complaining girls don't like them. Have only themselves to blame for their circumstances.

Yes, that is right what you say, but not true.

They talk themselves out of dating before they have even said hello to the girl. No one can help you with that. If you want to go down that road than expect to not date very often.

I don't give a thing about what you want me to expect.

Quit trying to be the knight in perpetually shining your armor waiting for your moment.

God loves my armor.

Instead go out get it battered and dented looking for your moment.

That is true.

You gain confidence by doing what you thought you couldn't do before. Even when you fail you learn at the very least not what to do the next time. The real Alpha male is the one that doesn't quit trying or learning.

But some people need uplifting and kind words first, before they can get their armor battered and dented. Some were gifted with poisoned bleeding wounds of the heart.

Originally posted by KeliOnyx
reply to post by Angle

 

It doesn't really work that way. Yes people can help one to become more confident, but depending on someone else to bring you from 0 just isn't gonna happen.

Thank you for being human, offcourse, this was sarcastic to the bone.

The reality of it is this, the so-called "nice guys", you know the ones always whining and complaining girls don't like them. Have only themselves to blame for their circumstances.

Yes, that is right what you say, but not true.

They talk themselves out of dating before they have even said hello to the girl. No one can help you with that. If you want to go down that road than expect to not date very often.

I don't give a thing about what you want me to expect.

Quit trying to be the knight in perpetually shining your armor waiting for your moment.

God loves my armor.

Instead go out get it battered and dented looking for your moment.

That is true.

You gain confidence by doing what you thought you couldn't do before. Even when you fail you learn at the very least not what to do the next time. The real Alpha male is the one that doesn't quit trying or learning.

But some people need uplifting and kind words first, before they can get their armor battered and dented. Some were gifted with poisoned bleeding wounds of the heart.

reply to post by Angle


wow, LISTEN to Kelionyx.

That poster knows exactly what's up.

Oops, howcome that ended in a double post.

yes, poster above, but what I said was true too.




So, do you see now there is actually nothing to worry about?

reply to post by Angle


Finding a girlfriend is the least of those peoples troubles. They would be far better served in seeking professional help first.

This is all quite simple.

The OP is a Mother's Boy.

She indulged him too much and he expects all other women to do the same.

He is weak and fearful because Mama indulged and soothed and corrected his problems for him.

He's acting the same right here - I am hurt, I want Mommy to come to fix it all. And it's HER fault when things are not fixed. (HER now equals any and all women.)

I blame (some) Mothers of boys for this. Many of them will go far out of their way with the Sons, much more so then they will do with their Daughters.

They make their sons into an emotional 'lover' or mate and fawn all over him. They have, essentially, an 'emotional affair' with the son.

You can research this online, it goes on even to this day.

And it can happen whether the Dad is in the picture or not.

Old saying: No one is ever going to love you like your Mother did.

OP is a Mother's Boy.

Blatantly obvious.

This can be overcome. As others have suggested - it's going to take therapy.

reply to post by FalseMove


I have seen this so many times with women and their sons. They never teach them how to do anything for themselves , cooing and catering to their every need. They raise them to believe that the standard woman is to be infatuated with their greatness without reason. They then get angry at women for not automatically kissing the floor they walk on just because they breathe.

reply to post by fadedface


I'm not really sure why everyone thinks he needs psychological help. What he needs to understand himself and find the right partner.

I am a very feminine man, most women would consider me week outside of my intelligence. I am a lover not a fighter. I am so feminine at times I have been asked, and even accused, ever since I was little if I was Gay.

The right women for me has to be more manly. A woman who herself was also considered gay by others. A true tomboy. Someone who my love brings a compliment to there strength. However; she also has to be strong enough herself to realize that I am also a man. At times I want to be in control.

There are women out there that prefer this type of relationship. They can be hard to find but trust me if you find the right Tom Boy, assuming you share at least some common interests, you will find the most beautiful woman in the world, no matter what she actually looks like.

Have patience, you are looking for someone who they themselves don't necessarily fit in. Not because they don't fit in but rather because they simply don't act exactly like the rest of their gender. Do not give up, just be patient and pray. The aggressive types typically like intelligent conversation and a since of humor.

And if you don't like the tom boy aggressive women, then you need to become the man that the women you are attracted to needs. You have no other choice, and you can do it, without psychiatric help.

You can do it because you can do anything if love is your motivation.

Originally posted by KeliOnyx

Originally posted by Jepic
I find people that say "confidence is everything" to be quite superficial. To any genuine relationship worthy person, confidence should not even be a factor. What really matters is personality, character, and views on life. And of course physical appearance.

If you know people that reject other people because they are not confident, be assured they obviously didn't care about you in the first place. If you care about confidence, you really only care about who other people will see you around with.

"Confidence"... Such a pointless quality when it comes to LOVE.

Confidence has nothing to do with the ability to love something or someone.

CHECK YOSELF! REALITY CHECK!

edit on 21/5/13 by Jepic because: (no reason given)

Wrong if you have no confidence in yourself your personality, character and views on life are well, going to pretty much suck. Physical attractiveness will only get you so far before all your other shortcomings start coming into play. Face it if you are not confident in who you are, no one else is going to want to be with you. There is a reason pity parties are a solitary affair.

It is possible for the one who lacks confidence to love perfectly. Confidence is only a condition of love because you believe it to be so. Love should be without condition but everyone who has replied negatively keeps on wanting to make love conditional. Why does someone have to change to love or to be loved? Unless they are doing something that is obviously against love.

Being shy and lacking confidence around women says nothing about one's ability to love. Can everyone stop looking at the physical and the exterior? I literally can be whoever I want at anytime, but I would rather just be me. Anything else is an act. If you need me to act like something I am not for you to love me than you never really loved me.

Why not just look for the person who is the most likely to love you and stop looking for the partner that is the most sexually appealing. Once we all put love first then we will find love in our relationships. As long as any trait that is not love is your primary target in a relationship it is likely you will find what you were looking for.

If you're looking for confidence that borders on arrogance, alpha male, that is what you will find; A man most likely more into himself than into the woman.

If you're looking for love, you will probably find a man who loves you.

Pursue love and you will find love.

Wow it's amazing how judgmental the betas in this thread are.

No wonder women don't want you, when you come off being such a hater they can tell and that doesn't translate to anything positive in their minds. They like motivated outgoing guys, and you cannot be that type of guy, at least not in the aspects that they are attracted to, without being confident.

It's all really simple but I see so many of you talking about "love", news flash, it doesn't exist. Attraction exists. "Love" is a form of psychological dependance. It's something that desperate people use to latch onto another human being. Ever notice how desperate people lacking confidence are always quick to fall in love should the occasion arise? Ever wonder why women are so turned off when you fall so hard so fast? It's scary, it's not love, it's psychotic.

Originally posted by liquidsmoke206
Wow it's amazing how judgmental the betas in this thread are.

No wonder women don't want you, when you come off being such a hater they can tell and that doesn't translate to anything positive in their minds. They like motivated outgoing guys, and you cannot be that type of guy, at least not in the aspects that they are attracted to, without being confident.

So spot on.

I am really thinking it is no use with these guys really. You can be a shy, introspective guy and successfully date. What everyone has been telling them is that all they have to do is meet a minimum social threshold. They only have to be outgoing enough to have a freaking conversation. That is it, that is all there is to it. I keep seeing over and over "but I can love, I have a right to be loved". Well guess what? Unless you are willing to talk to the girl you want to be loved by, you are NOT going to be. What do the "bad-boys" have that they do not? They are capable of saying they desire your attention.

The whole entire point of dating is so simple, and these "intellectual giants" miss the purpose entirely. The whole point of dating and courtship is to go out have a good time so that whoever it is you are with associates the "fun" chemical brain cocktail with you.

Things "nice guys" don't know but really need to:

The first thing you have to understand 85% of the time you get rejected asking a girl out it isn't personal. Wait I get it the male ego is a fragile thing and guys see it as personal, but it really isn't. So stop taking it personally.

If you don't like yourself, no one else is going to. On the rare occasion you find someone that does you both should seek professional help because you are bound to have a really unhealthy relationship.

More women have been interested in you, than you would possibly believe. But because you couldn't work up the nerve to do anything about it they moved on.

Waiting for a woman to come to you gets you damaged neurotic women that will make you miserable.

If you are unhappy with your life, no one else will be happy sharing it with you. make your life a place you love living and people will want to be there too. In other words, if you view your life as a toilet don't be shocked when someone rolls in and takes a dump.