Why women are unhappy

American statistics show that despite huge gains in achieving equality with men, women are less happy than they were 40 years ago. They are also less happy than men.

The United States General Social Survey, which questions American men and women on their happiness levels, reports that nearly all women – whether married or single, with children or without, working or not – are less happy than in 1972.

www.marieclaire.co.uk...

Just goes to show you, you just can't please women, no matter how hard you try.

In spite of social changes freeing women to do more and the promise that women can have it all; Success, a career, family, women in general are not as happy as their male counterparts.

Ha, how about that..

I am as i'm typing this having issues with my girlfriend on the couch next to me, she is sooo unhappy and for the life of me I don't know why!!

Nothing I do right now could make her happy

I would venture to say its because they are working outside their biological roles and are getting very tired of it.

I would also venture to say that a lot of women would love to go back to being house wives and mothers if the husband could afford it.

On the flip side, I would also state that males are having similar issues due to not being "Men" any more. I know I'm always happier after I finish mowing the yard or fixing the guttering than if I have to wash dishes or mop the floors.

Not being sexist, just throwing out an idea.

[edit on 15-10-2009 by midnightbrigade]

they are unhappy because all thier role models are nuerotic messes. sex in the SH^TTY desperate housesluts.

this type of lame display of women ecourages otehr women to bitc*yness and insecurity.

then they blubber, and expect us to cuddle a blubbering grizzly nuerotic mess!

as for men not being men, how true is that!
from metro to unable to change a spare tyre in 10 short years!!

teh whole world (western/civilised zones) are in for a huge social collapse. even if its not NWO just all these confused scared and neurotic men and women unable to cope with living..

*sigh*

ps sorry to those of you who see this as sexism, but you know.. i calls it likes i sees it!

I'll be happy when everyone shuts their pie holes.

Nobodys happy, fact of life. Get over it.

But what about feelings and feeling happy? Me, me me me.

Wow, have you got that wrong. You think "women have it all"? That's a load of crap.

What has happened is that women have fought for the right to work at any jobs they can do (which is most of them), fought to get equal wages for equal work (hasn't happened yet), fought to be given leadership roles (hasn't happened yet), and so on. Great strides were made. Women now are in the work force in huge numbers. Women are getting into management positions, but not often in the top ranks. There is still a glass ceiling beyond which they can't seem to move. Women are not yet paid equally, for equal work. We're moving in that direction, but we're not there yet. We're much closer than we were in 1972, of course.

So, if women have so much more than they did in 1972, why are they unhappier? Because women are still expected to perform their traditional roles as homemaker, cook, housemaid, and so on. While they get to work a full week just like the men, they then get to come home and cook dinner, clean the house, do the laundry, take care of the kids, and so on. When a couple's careers require a change, it is usually the woman who is expected to abandon her career to move with the man, or to give it up altogether to care for children.

So while women have done well in moving into traditionally male roles, men have not moved much to take over traditionally female roles. Who stays home when a kid gets sick? Who runs the kid to the doctor? Who runs them back and forth to their various activities? Usually the mother.

Oh, yeah. One more thing. Then, after all that, they have to put up with some guy's comment that "they're never satisfied no matter how hard we try to please them".

reply to post by chiron613

Wow, have you got that wrong. You think "women have it all"? That's a load of crap.

I said the promise that they could have it all. Not that women do have it all. I said the promise that they can.

Oh, yeah. One more thing. Then, after all that, they have to put up with some guy's comment that "they're never satisfied no matter how hard we try to please them".

Again misquoted, I said: Just goes to show you, you just can't please women, no matter how hard you try.

in 1972 people didn't need to have their every wish and whim satisfied immediately in order for them to "feel happy". they understood that there were up's and down's in life and that an overall average of good made them feel "happy".

happiness is a subjective value, if your society suggests that you must have everything in order to be happy, and you suck it up and buy into that crap, you never will be.

consumerism requires a constant feeling of dissatisfaction in order to function, it's social conditioning. the reason women fell less happy is because they are more susceptible to it, either naturally or because they're targeted.

they also seem more inclined to give responsibility for their happiness to an outside source rather than feeling they are able to take control and make themselves happy.

Originally posted by okamitengu
they are unhappy because all thier role models are nuerotic messes. sex in the SH^TTY desperate housesluts.

this type of lame display of women ecourages otehr women to bitc*yness and insecurity.

then they blubber, and expect us to cuddle a blubbering grizzly nuerotic mess!

as for men not being men, how true is that!
from metro to unable to change a spare tyre in 10 short years!!

teh whole world (western/civilised zones) are in for a huge social collapse. even if its not NWO just all these confused scared and neurotic men and women unable to cope with living..

*sigh*

ps sorry to those of you who see this as sexism, but you know.. i calls it likes i sees it!

Are you trying to say there's something wrong with high heels, cute outfits and friends to gossip about guys with? Come on, you're bursting my bubble here.

Originally posted by chiron613
women are still expected to perform their traditional roles as homemaker, cook, housemaid, and so on.

what an utter cop out. that isn't societal sexism, it's a domestic issue. the division of labour in a house is between the people in the house, it is not societies business. take some responsibility for your own situation.

Originally posted by midnightbrigade
I would venture to say its because they are working outside their biological roles and are getting very tired of it.

I would also venture to say that a lot of women would love to go back to being house wives and mothers if the husband could afford it.

On the flip side, I would also state that males are having similar issues due to not being "Men" any more. I know I'm always happier after I finish mowing the yard or fixing the guttering than if I have to wash dishes or mop the floors.

Not being sexist, just throwing out an idea.

[edit on 15-10-2009 by midnightbrigade]

gah! i agree wholeheartedly!

as a stay at home mom my only complaint IS getting my boyfriend to man up and get to work outside of the home (though i love him dearly and appreciate his company) it takes time away from my heavenly housework. hahaha

nah, but when he's not distracting me or crying that i pay too much attention to the kids and he's jealous...life is peachy and i could imagine many people would be happy in similar situation, whether they believe it or not!

maybe the 'equality' issue will die down and women will start embracing their womanly, child-rearing roles. maybe i'm just one of a dying few? who knows.....

[edit on 10/15/2009 by double_frick]

okay, here's my opinion.

women always knew they were equal to men in intelligence (if not superior ha ha), but just got sick of being legally described as 'physical property or chattels' having no rights, forced marriages, and in later years having no vote and being considered 'dumb' because they hadnt contributed much to science over the years.

of course no one mentioned that it could have been because raising and giving birth to 22 kids on average tends to take it out of you over the years. how much time do you seriously have left to discover gravity? and after 22 kids, would you care?

i think what women really wanted was not so much to be treated exactly the SAME as men (cuz we're not the same), but to be treated with exactly the same amount of RESPECT. if not a little bit more...

since respect was lacking for women in the area of intellectual pursuits they have felt they have to 'prove themselves' equally as intelligent as men or something. seems blatantly obvious to me that they'r emore intelligent, but maybe they just thought men seemed to have forgotten this little fact and needed a reminder.

so now they are in a situation where they cant raise their own kids cuz they have to work; so they get separated from the baby at an early date (which probably traumatises some mums and kids, it would traumatise me anyway) or they dont see enough of the kids; are doing housework and trying to have a high powered career.

speaking as someone who has trouble just coping wit the career and housework, i cant even imagine having to look after a kid as well and work; particularly not on my own.

that could account for some of it.

one thing that depresses me also is the way other women and girls are treated all over the world; and even to some extent in western countries.
it is a sad fact that there is a LOT of physical and sexual abuse of women worldwide. and has been throughout history. i think thats pretty depressing.

maybe women just want to be treated better (kindly) and with respect. thats probably it. (just treating women kindly is still a major issue in countries like saudi arabia as you can see from reading books like 'princess' and othe rhorror stories that come out of there etc). i dont think its too much to ask. after all, every man was raised by and given birth to by a woman; so all men should respect women. in my opinion.

the world i fyou look around is still run by men. look at the governments of countries; the heads of corporations; and heads of religions etc. mostly men. and the world is in a terrible state with wars etc.

maybe the world balance has tipped in favour of th emasculine; and yin and yang are out of balancce. the feminine isnt as powerful as it should be. by this i also mean the MOTHERING instinct/part of the feminine.

i often see animals as children and it makes me sad at how badly htey're treated by humans. i also think wars are against the feminine aspect/instinct.

also i think around one in four or one in three women are sexually abused at some point in their lives i read somewhere; which is higher than men; so it may explain some of it.

also women have more pain on a regular basis than men e.g. period pain/PMS/hormonal issues. i know that on a monthly basis for a couple of days i feel like crying for no reason and generally a tad suicidal/homocidal for no reason. its just PMS i usually realise. also childbirth isnt pretty yet women are pretty stoical about it. i suspect if men had to give birth to kids there wouldnt be any.


oh and im not bashing men ; they have a very important role to fulfil and if men and women work together i think its a really good thing. i think in a lot of cases men try hard to look after and support their families and should be appreciated for it.

but one thing that i was thinking today that irritates me, is how women are still referred to as 's...ts' or 'w....s' based on having different sexual partners; whereas there is no derogatory and widely accepted word for men who sleep around. so i still think womens lib has a while to go yet.

reply to post by double_frick


Will you marry me? A woman who enjoys a womans role is hard to find these days. I'm 27 and I would love to find a woman who is more interested in making a good home and raising children correctly than to go out to the bar every weekend, sleep off the good time, and bitch at me to wash the clothes after I mowed, washed the siding, changed the oil in the car and replaced the doorknob on the storm door (all from 8 AM - 3 PM on a Saturday)

Don't get me wrong though, I firmly believe a man SHOULD be a man. HE should do the dirty stuff, sweat, dig post holes for a new fence...yadda yadda. If the man isn't doing those things, then he needs to be bitched at.

I guess my biggest complaint is the blending of the roles that leaves both sexes feeling half empty...at least to me..

reply to post by rapunzel222


I'm not biting on your bait about women being smarter than men or deserving more respect. The only thing I can say to that is we are equal. No one deserves more than the other. Nuff said...

On the other hand, what you said about treating women kindly is absolutely correct. Men SHOULD treat women kindly. My grandfather never had an unkind word to say to his wife. But my grandmother also never bitched at him to buy her shoes they couldn't afford.

It's a give and take and it goes both ways. I WISH we could return to the days where women were women and men were men. I truly miss the show Home Improvement. Other than Hank Hill, Tim Allen was probably the last good male role model on TV. Yes he had the grunts, but that was poking fun at the "Macho Men" stereotype. He loved his kids, he treated them all well, he provided for his family and he did ALL the male things around the house. Jill never had to fix the toilet or rewire the dishwasher, but damn it Tim didn't have to wash the clothes or clean the tub.

They both helped each other out, but they knew their roles and knew that just because they did the others chores one week, their partner would be right back to doing them the next.

I loved that show because it illustrated positive family values, good role models for both women and men, and it was like watching my house on TV. They really showed that you can be modern AND traditional without loosing anything.

One last thing, you want to talk about childbirth pain...pass a kidney stone. I'll throw money down on that challenge ANY day. We BOTH have to suffer terrible pain sometimes...its the human condition.

Just throwing this out there, but perhaps women – on a global scale – are progressing through the "third stage of Personal Power" (this might sound a little 'New-age', so apologies to those that don't subscribe to these doctrines)

As we travel through life we grow and evolve – however this is not only an experience that happens on an individual level but on a group level as well.

What I have read about empowerment of the self (attainment of personal power) is that it progresses through four stages: Revolution, Involution, Narcissism and Evolution.

Revolution: the women's liberation movement in the 1960s.
Involution: the expansion of the self help age which started in the 80s.
Narcissism: the period being experienced now in the 00s (the ego self cannot be satisfied)
Evolution: if the above is an indication, still 10 years away.

reply to post by whatukno

In spite of social changes freeing women to do more and the promise that women can have it all; Success, a career, family, women in general are not as happy as their male counterparts.

When men attempt to achieve a goal it's because that is what they want and when they achieve it, they are happy that they have then move on to something else.

Women however, seem to have dislocate thoughts, not unlike Christopher Walken words leave their mouths but appear to be nothing to do with what they are thinking.

Women appear to chase goals just because they think they should be and are unhappy when not achieving what they set out to and equally discontented when they do, as they realize it wasn't what they wanted to begin with but won't admit such.

This (theory) is borne out in the way that women are forever buying new clothes or redecorating. In order for a man to survive and sometimes thrive in this female insanity it is wise to stay outside the clothing store with a migraine and develop a fondness for the colour beige.

Apparently women are designed to feather nests and cluck with other women. As much as they believe they want to saw wood all day sawing wood is not feathering a nest and most of their fellow workers don't cluck.

Secretarial and food production duties do however offer the opportunity for women to cluck an awful lot and sometimes simulate nest feathering.

In the movie as good as it gets, Helen Hunt asks Jack Nicholsons' character how he writes women so well. His reply was "I just think of a man, and remove reason and accountability" this to me sums up the minds of women and is a seriously good tip for anyone trying (the impossible) to understand them.

Women Know your limits !

Women just love a good moan. They will always find something to moan about, even when they are happy they have a bit of a moan.

I dont think that the women I know are unhappy, sure they all want that £500 handbag or £300 pair of shoes that they cant have but that is all they would change I reckon. More money for more stuff lol.

To the woman whos moaning that women have to work full time then come home and run a house. That isn't every house, most couples share house work. And about women not getting into powerful positions, look at Margaret Thatcher and Hilary Clinton.

In spite of social changes freeing women to do more and the promise that women can have it all; Success, a career, family, women in general are not as happy as their male counterparts.

We live in a society where success is measured on our wealth. Where happiness is contingent on our children wearing "fill in the blank name brand stuff". Where the most valuable commodity of all, time, is filled with working our bums off so we can continue to consume the stuff we just don't need.

As women we are constantly bombarded with media which extolls us to work harder, longer and to give up more and more of feminity in order accomplish the ultimate goal of being equal to men.

It's never good enough though. We have to continue to give up more and more in order to "make it". It's not enough that we went to work, we now have to give up being a significant part of our children's lives. It's not enough that we waited till later to have children in order to further our careers, we now have to leave our kids with other people for 10 hours of the day in order to do so. It's not enough that we get married later in life, we now have to "play the field" as long as possible in order to be entrenched in our careers before we get hitched.

No matter what we do, it never seems to be enough. Our role models as women aren't our grandmothers or mothers, they are jet setting celebrities and CEOS of HP. They don't stay at home, they work work work..whilst their children suffer...but it's ok because "stuff" will make up for all that, according to women's magazines the world over.

I would venture to say its because they are working outside their biological roles and are getting very tired of it.

I agree. I have made a personal decision to embrace my biologically assigned role in life.

I do not have a career.
I do not consume useless stuff.
I do not need my self esteem boosted by meaningless sexual encounters.
I do not attach myself to metrosexual men.
I do not compare myself to impossible standards the media tries to shove down our throats.


Despite all that I am very happy and fulfilled in my life. One day when and if I have children I will quit my job and take on the most important job in the world, that of raising children. I so look forward to that day, as then I will feel totally complete.


I am a woman. I embrace my femininity. I look forward to motherhood.

I am happy.

reply to post by Damien_uk

sure they all want that £500 handbag or £300 pair of shoes

Not all.

I manage to be attractive depsite no owning one pair of shoes over 20£. My man is proud to have me on his arm despite me not spending valuable time painitng my face.

Women are under a lot of pressure to consume. It's seen as part of being a woman. It's thrown in our faces by magazines and other regurgitated material that passes for entertainment in our society.

But, not every one is under that spell.

maybe we're unhappy because well, yous refused to give her equal rights, instead, yous handed her a welfare check as a bribe to stay in that role. you refused to go after the daddies of the world till it was way past due. and well, yours refused to pick up much if any of those responsibilities seen as fitting her role when she was force by that nice welfare system that yous created as a bribe for her and the economic chaos that it created to take on the extra load of earning the bread, which is really your role!!!