Ah Shadowflux. I came to the same conclusions back in 1991, after finishing my Media Studies A Level (here in merry old England). After a year of
learning that what the news shows you is in fact biased and not completely objective, I began researching everything, including religion, the
paranormal, politics, ethics & morals, everything. Like you, I suffered disillusionment to the point that I fell into a very dark depression that
lasted many years.
Let it go. Let it all go.
Not the knowledge: it's important that you remember what you have learned. But you don't have to change the world all on your own: there are others
feeling what you are feeling, who want to use this knowledge to make the world better themselves. Listen to a lot of the other posts in this thred:
there's a lot of wisdom there. Reconnect with the natural. Go camping, turn off your TV, go walk barefoot in the park. Simple things, but hughely
effective. But chief above all of these is to remember that you aren't alone; that you have others who will be there, doing the best they can in
their part of the world, waking people up to the reality of the world rather than the stupor they are in. We're all here alongside you, and we're
only a post away.
I agree also that going back to that stupor looks mighty attractive right now: is it better not to know than to know? But once you get into this stuff
you are hooked: knowledge, true knowledge, is more addictive than any drug. Which is why conspiracy theories are so much fun and so addictive; it's
why all of these secret societies (if they are really there) spend so much time and resources in constructing plausible deniability. They don't want
you to know what they know. The most scary thing is, it mainly comes down to the rich wanting to stay rich. For all the UFOs, aliens, urban legends,
ghosts, monsters, and everything else spooky, most of these smokescreens are made by people wanting more money and trying to stop you getting more
money of your own. I am convinced that if some entrepreneur came across a downed saucer, the first thing they'd think isn't about what a momentous
occasion this would be - it's about what patents they could file, what they could put into mass production. Greed seems to me to be the prime
motivator of modern human behaviour - above procreation, above shelter, above food. Greed in all its forms.
It's an ugly truth, to be sure. But now you know what really makes the world go round, you can construct a little corner of that ugly world that is
always yours, like a family, or a mission, a cause, a commitment to your community, your friends, a social circle, anything you want. Decide what's
important to you most. Surround yourself with people who are in harmony with that. Live towards those goals you have given yourself. And make your own
life the way you want it, and be happy in it. Try to change the world sure: a lot of us are doing the same. But always live by the Serenity Prayer,
which has nothing to do with Joss Whedon, and makes all the sense in the world:
God, grant me the courage to change the things that I can change; the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change; and the wisdom to know the
Go with grace, keep your wits about you, and remember: it's never all bad. There's more good than bad in this universe. And there are other pilgrims
out here with you, learning as we go. You are not alone.