Is It Now Considered “Sexual Misconduct” to Ask For Sex?

originally posted by: OccamsRazor04
a reply to: darkbake

Apparently sex is never consensual unless the power balance is 100% even. Here comes our extinction.

As long as it's not a factor in the relationship, then it's not relevant. Don't prey on people you have power over... seems pretty darn simple to me.

a reply to: Aazadan

Stop conflating being a sleeze with sexual assault.

originally posted by: OccamsRazor04
a reply to: melatonin

In the statement released by his publicist, C.K. said in part: "At the time, I said to myself that what I did was okay because I never showed a woman my dick without asking first, which is also true.

Did he say whether they actually said 'yes'? Did he say whether he forced them to watch when they wanted to leave? did he say whether he used his clout in the business to keep these people silent?

The allegations go back to 2012. They have been circulating for a long time.

Jeez, like dragging a horse to water...

defamer.gawker.com...

He has been trying to keep this stuff silent for years, lol. It's nothing new.

a reply to: melatonin

That's all answered. In fact we know of women who said no, with no repercussions.
CK says they said yes. Of the women who claim they did not say yes we know 2 are proven liars. They already were interviewed and said when he asked they both gave him a thumbs up. That's a yes.

a reply to: melatonin
I read your source. What did CK do according to your source to keep this quiet

originally posted by: OccamsRazor04
a reply to: melatonin

That's all answered. In fact we know of women who said no, with no repercussions.
CK says they said yes. Of the women who claim they did not say yes we know 2 are proven liars. They already were interviewed and said when he asked they both gave him a thumbs up. That's a yes.

Haha, so here we go - cast aspersions and denigrate those making the allegations. But take what the abusive masturbator claims at face value - a blatent sexual pervert would never tell a lie, lol.

Same old, same old. Minimise, invalidate, shame, blame, doubt, denigrate the victims.

He asked if he could get his wang out. He decided to start bashing away. When they wanted to leave, he stopped them. That is sexual assault.

gawker.com...

People like you are the problem. We have nothing further to discuss (:

originally posted by: melatonin

originally posted by: OccamsRazor04
a reply to: melatonin

That's all answered. In fact we know of women who said no, with no repercussions.
CK says they said yes. Of the women who claim they did not say yes we know 2 are proven liars. They already were interviewed and said when he asked they both gave him a thumbs up. That's a yes.

Haha, so here we go - cast aspersions and denigrate those making the allegations. But take what the abusive masturbator claims at face value - a blatent sexual pervert would never tell a lie, lol.

Same old, same old.

Nice lies. I did no such thing. They are liars because they already admitted when he asked they both gave him a thumbs up. They then claimed they never said yes.

Like you, they are imply making fabrications.

The two ladies gladly joined him, and offered him some weed. He turned it down, but asked if it would be OK if he took his dick out.

Thinking he was joking (that's exactly the kind of thing this guy would say), the women gave a facetious thumbs up.

"You asked but we never said yes," tweeted the account of comedy duo Dana Min Goodman and Julia Wolov.

So which is it, did they give him a thumbs up, or did they never say yes. They have given contradictory accounts.

We know of women he asked who said no. He did not whip it out. He did not go after them. There were no repercussions.

And Rebecca Corry, who said no when C.K. asked if she would watch him masturbate, retweeted comedy writer Katie Rich's response, "If a woman wants to see your penis she will tell you."

Yes, I believe you are done.

originally posted by: OccamsRazor04

And Rebecca Corry, who said no when C.K. asked if she would watch him masturbate, retweeted comedy writer Katie Rich's response, "If a woman wants to see your penis she will tell you."

Yes, I believe you are done.

Lol, you're a beaut D:

That is just one of many allegations. He stopped them leaving, even if they willingly and with full informed consent agreed to him masturbating in front of them (which they didn't), when they tried to leave it then becomes sexual assault.

He has been using his clout and power to keep these people silent for years.

This is the same power games used in cases like Harvey Weinstein. You are, at minimum, an enabler of this sort of abusive conduct. You even played the denigrate the victims of sexually inappropriate behaviour card.

This is how Weinstein's, Spacey, Jimmy Saville's and many other sexually abusive people get to freely play the field for so long.

Have fun little man, but not at the expense of other people's boundaries (:

originally posted by: melatonin
Lol, you're a beaut D:

That is just one of many allegations. He stopped them leaving, even if they willingly and with full informed consent agreed to him masturbating in front of them (which they didn't), when they tried to leave it then becomes sexual assault.

He has been using his clout and power to keep these people silent for years.

The people making that claim are already proven liars. They are the 2 ladies who claim they never said yes, even though they have admitted to saying yes already.

Them being liars is not a question, they have given contradictory statements.

2 of the women claim they told him no, when they said no he did not do anything. There were no repercussions either.

Please source him using his power an what he did to these women to silence them, details please.

a reply to: Metallicus

You just go around asking people for sex? It's an offense if it is outside a personal relationship and it is a business relationship. It's an offense if someone has not indicated they would be open to such an event.
Hell it could be an offense if you simply haven't showered lol.

originally posted by: OccamsRazor04

The people making that claim are already proven liars. They are the 2 ladies who claim they never said yes, even though they have admitted to saying yes already.

They didn't say 'yes' to him masturbating. Jesus. When your doctor asks you to get your wang out so he can check you for impotence, try masturbating in front of him. I'm sure you'll find that consent for getting a wang out is not the same as consent to masturbating.

They are not lying. As they stated they gave thumbs up when he asked if he could get his dong out. They thought he was joking and gave thumbs up. He is a comedian. When he actually starting masturbating they tried to leave. He stopped them. You suggesting they are liars is just the common attempt at casting doubt and denigrating victims of sexual offences. It's pretty normal for some people - you can own it (:

That is sexual assault. lol

Even if they willingly and with full informed consent agreed to him masturbating (which they didn't), but then they decided against it then they are free to extract themselves - there is no right to orgasm D:

The above is essentially the case of giving consent and then withdrawing consent during the act/situation. To deny them the opportunity to withdraw consent pushes it into sexual assault.

The above is basic ethics.

a reply to: Zcustosmorum

What if it's an ugly woman. And what if she's a lot older and significantly over weight and your boss?

originally posted by: melatonin

They are not lying. As they stated they gave thumbs up when he asked if he could get his dong out. They thought he was joking and gave thumbs up.

They thought it was a joke, so said yes. He was not joking.

a reply to: Sillyolme

Then I simply say no.

originally posted by: OccamsRazor04

originally posted by: melatonin

They are not lying. As they stated they gave thumbs up when he asked if he could get his dong out. They thought he was joking and gave thumbs up.

They thought it was a joke, so said yes. He was not joking.

Yes, he wanted to get his dong out. He wasn't joking.

He didn't ask whether he could masturbate in front of them. And even if he did (which he didn't), they would be within their rights to withdraw consent during the act and leave the scene.

He stopped them leaving the scene. Ergo, that is sexual assault.

Is this how you negotiate sex with a partner? If so, you might want to work on your technique. First base consent really would be first base consent and no more, just in case you are confused D:

a reply to: Metallicus

It's not the request for sex. It's not the refusal by the requested. It's the power differential. If your boss is asking you for sex, that's the issue. That's the problem that Harvey Weinstein is accused of.

Louis CK just exposed himself to women, expecting them to want to have sex with him. He admitted this. He might be sorry?

Kevin Spacey is accused of trying to rape a 14-year old boy. He said that he was too drunk to form memories of the event.

George Takei is accused of drugging a gay male model and then trying to undress him.

Jeremy Piven is accused of several (three?) sexual assaults involving him forcibly trying to convince women to have sex with him.

NONE of these guys have been charged with a crime. For some of the situations that is because the statute of limitations has run out. However, all of these men are in the entertainment industry; an industry built on public opinion. If you look like a rapey pedophile to men and women 21-55, you will probably not have a job on Monday.

Just FYI, the same is not true in Washington.

a reply to: Metallicus

Regardless of what people are saying here, it is totally blown out of proportion the ability of a women now being able to literally destroy a man, his and career over an allegation. It should be illegal to allow any name to surface until a court deems someone guilty and even then, it is no one's business yet many deem it is because people are sad and love gossip.

Women know the power they now have and use that to gain money, attention or fame. Some men are also to blame for this too, as some gay men will also jump on this bandwagon.

To many softies in this world, with no clue of real harassment. Its funny how someone getting sexually touched is worse off then someone getting brutally beaten to the point of near death. You'd get less time in prison for the beating.

a reply to: BlackProject

Regardless of what people are saying here, it is totally blown out of proportion the ability of a women now being able to literally destroy a man, his and career over an allegation.

Yeah. Just look what happened to Trump.

A guy stating that women have no insight into harassment. And its now a case of women destroying men. Ugh.

Each individual case for Louis CK is a rather smallish violation in the grand scheme of things. They were not (or so far not) cases of violent sexual assault. More akin to the dirty dude flashing and masturbating but aggravated in some instances.

Hence, each individual Louis CK case was often dismissed because, in general, the cost of acting and reporting is pretty substantial. In fact, the power and resulting coercion to not report is notable. It is actually indicative of how normalised this sort of behaviour is in society in general.

Then we move to the Weinstein's. The general situation is the same. Individual cases, but this time violations are much greater. In fact, classic invasive rape in many instances. The same cost of acting and coercion is in play. So these also can often go unpunished. And do so for a long time when the situation allows.

The Louis CK example actually is only quantitatively different from the Weinstein.

The underlying issue that allows this to happen is the normalisation, cost (psychological, social, economic, legal) for victims to act, and external coercion to not act.

These women never asked for either Weinstein or Louis CK to violate their boundaries. It is not generally a female problem (although enablers exist). I'm sure they would much prefer that such violations never happened.

It is a much wider social issue and male issue. In neither case were Weinstein or Louis CK in any way justified to violate boundaries.

To turn this back on these women for being soft and/or vindictive is a part of the problem.

originally posted by: lincolnparadox

Louis CK just exposed himself to women, expecting them to want to have sex with him. He admitted this. He might be sorry?

No, he did not want sex, nor did he expose himself. He asked them if they wanted to watch him masturbate. Some said yes, and he did it. Some said no and he didn't.