Kids are the root of all evil...

Originally posted by Manhater
reply to post by galadofwarthethird

 

When I told her I wasn't going to put my dog to sleep, she got angry, then she said she was calling animal control to have them pick him up and put him to sleep, I told her "good luck with that", that's when she threw all the food and drinks all over me. I was so irate. That's when I told her mother to get her the heck out of my house. I think the next time she acts like that, I'm going to tell her mom to go to a hotel or a shelter. Because her butt is not going to stay here with that attitude.

Set some ground rules. If they wish to continue to live in your home then they must obey your rules and respect your home or they can find some other place to live and stick to your guns. Sooner or later your sister will get tired of being thrown out of every place they go to live and jerk a knot in that girls' tail.

I'm a little curious why someone would come on a conspiracy forum for parenting advice...especially concerning someone else's kid.

You know...just asking.

reply to post by Starchild23


People come to conspiracy sites for all kinds of reasons...

www.abovetopsecret.com...

I think parenting advice is a good enough reason!

Criticize cautiously!!!

Originally posted by Starchild23


I'm a little curious why someone would come on a conspiracy forum for parenting advice...especially concerning someone else's kid.

You know...just asking.

edit on CSaturdayam515141f41America/Chicago04 by Starchild23 because: (no reason given)

Free advice and cheaper than renting a shrink.

It's just a rant, sometimes people need a venue to vent steam before they explode.

Originally posted by lonewolf19792000

Originally posted by Starchild23


I'm a little curious why someone would come on a conspiracy forum for parenting advice...especially concerning someone else's kid.

You know...just asking.

edit on CSaturdayam515141f41America/Chicago04 by Starchild23 because: (no reason given)

Free advice and cheaper than renting a shrink.

It's just a rant, sometimes people need a venue to vent steam before they explode.

Right on the money.

Not rich for the shrink and before I really crack this girl with a spanking, it's better to come on here and pout it out.



I'm a shy, non-social person and quiet. But this child is going to turn me into a demon.

You know how belittling you feel every time you get food thrown at you. I have to wash everything over again, re-mop the floor, pick up the garbage. Ugh. And it be one 1 hour to the next hour. Exhausting.

I just suggested to her the allowance to work for chores and be good, she said "no", she wanted to be a hairstylist. So, I dropped it. Before she gets worked up. Don't interrupt her while she's watching a movie.

Originally posted by colbyforce

Originally posted by Manhater
reply to post by galadofwarthethird

 

When I told her I wasn't going to put my dog to sleep, she got angry, then she said she was calling animal control to have them pick him up and put him to sleep, I told her "good luck with that", that's when she threw all the food and drinks all over me. I was so irate. That's when I told her mother to get her the heck out of my house. I think the next time she acts like that, I'm going to tell her mom to go to a hotel or a shelter. Because her butt is not going to stay here with that attitude.

I probably would have put her through the wall, but that's just me.

Not just you, I would have also had some drywalling to do after that.

I should stay away from this thread, I want to reach out and throttle that girl. I don't have a lot of patience, and I would have cracked her one by now.

Manhater, you really need to take back your life. Get them away from you, kick them out.

Plus, if she does call animal control, you could lose your dog, even though the dog is innocent. It happens far too often.

reply to post by Manhater


Oh dear.

Of course it's far too easy for me to make comments or suggestions from afar, but there is your problem. She's said 'no' and you've accepted it. What happens if you say 'no' to her? Lemme guess...

Although, perhaps you picked a bad time to try and negotiate?

Anyway, now is the time to adopt a policy of those who don't work don't eat - and I'm serious. If she won't help with cooking or washing the dishes, stop providing food for her. Even if it means eating out by yourself, stop bringing food home. And empty your cupboards and fridge asap.

Don't wash dishes, either. Put away all your best china and cutlery and let your sister and her kid fend for themselves. Even if it means they're eating take-aways from paper plates

Don't lift a finger. The kid isn't yours so you can't be done for not feeding her. That's down to her mother.

I've been through sharing places with people who won't help out. Learn to sit them out - they'll have to do something eventually.

Originally posted by Manhater

Originally posted by lonewolf19792000

Originally posted by Starchild23


I'm a little curious why someone would come on a conspiracy forum for parenting advice...especially concerning someone else's kid.

You know...just asking.

edit on CSaturdayam515141f41America/Chicago04 by Starchild23 because: (no reason given)

Free advice and cheaper than renting a shrink.

It's just a rant, sometimes people need a venue to vent steam before they explode.

Right on the money.

Not rich for the shrink and before I really crack this girl with a spanking, it's better to come on here and pout it out.

I'm a shy, non-social person and quiet. But this child is going to turn me into a demon.

You know how belittling you feel every time you get food thrown at you. I have to wash everything over again, re-mop the floor, pick up the garbage. Ugh. And it be one 1 hour to the next hour. Exhausting.

edit on 4-2-2012 by Manhater because: (no reason given)

Well, Jesus says to do unto others as you would have done to you. Obviously if shes abusing you and throwing food and drink on you, maybe you should show her how it feels and humble her? It is what she is asking you to do by doing it to you. Sounds like the girl needs to learn humility and dumping food and drink over her head would be a step in that direction.

reply to post by lonewolf19792000


Trust me, I thought about it. I went shopping after her screaming at the top of her lungs for chicken nuggets and threw everything she asked for on the floor, like she does my whole fridge sometimes. And she was crying "Why are you doing this to me?" Like her world was crumbling again."And I told her, "Just doing do what you do." And there she is picking up her prized possessions. It was first time she actually lifted a finger in the house without begging me or mother to do it.

I can just see if now if I dumped food on her. The screaming would never end, then she'll be calling social services on me again. Telling her what mean Aunt I am. Then she'll call 911, saying I abused her. Oh, that night would never end.

Nice ideal though.

Originally posted by snowspirit

Originally posted by colbyforce

Originally posted by Manhater
reply to post by galadofwarthethird

 

When I told her I wasn't going to put my dog to sleep, she got angry, then she said she was calling animal control to have them pick him up and put him to sleep, I told her "good luck with that", that's when she threw all the food and drinks all over me. I was so irate. That's when I told her mother to get her the heck out of my house. I think the next time she acts like that, I'm going to tell her mom to go to a hotel or a shelter. Because her butt is not going to stay here with that attitude.

I probably would have put her through the wall, but that's just me.

Not just you, I would have also had some drywalling to do after that.

I should stay away from this thread, I want to reach out and throttle that girl. I don't have a lot of patience, and I would have cracked her one by now.

Manhater, you really need to take back your life. Get them away from you, kick them out.

Plus, if she does call animal control, you could lose your dog, even though the dog is innocent. It happens far too often.

Yeah, what that kid did was the ultimate of disrespect, which I do not tolerate from anyone for a second. The kid needs to learn some tough lessons, her very own training day. She's 16 for pete's sake. I'll give Denzel a call and see what day works for him.

reply to post by colbyforce


LOL, maybe Denzel can shape her up. Yuh, If my training Sargent, Sgt. Steve was here, she would be crying everyday. I miss him. That guy was awesome and man, he never put up with nothing. He made me cry home to daddy quite a few times.

Originally posted by Manhater

Originally posted by JulieTruly
reply to post by Manhater

 

Kids are not evil. You sound self-centered. Being nice isn't about getting a good response. Be lucky you can afford a leather couch. Just sayin...

I earned that right to be self centered thank you. I work my butt off. While they sit home all day destroying everything I worked for. I don't have all this money in the world to keep replacing the things that she keeps wanting to destroy. Once in while does her mom clean. But, I do appreciate her trying. She needs to do more. Rather then sleeping all day and playing on the computer all day. They may pay rent, but being lazy is not healthy for either one of them. Her daughter sits there and plays stupid sims all day fighting with people, burning up the house. Being mean to the animals, trying to get pregnant. It's a no wonder this kids mind is so warped. It's from that stupid game. Which is a bad influence on her. If you take it away. She will scream holy hell. School is now a bad influence on her, from the crap she comes with hearing juvenile punks talking smack all day, then she comes home thinking she can do it.

edit on 4-2-2012 by Manhater because: (no reason given)

At first I thought you were talking about a small child. And this is not your child? There is no way anyone would be able to live with me and get away with destroying my things. If she is afraid of being homeless she has you fooled. And by the way, wouldn't this be more apropriate on Facebook?

reply to post by JulieTruly


I don't like facebook. Besides, my whole family is facebook frenzies (Including mom). If they only knew what I thought about this situation. They would probably still say I'm heartless.

Yuh, being heartless would be taking back the microphone I just bought her that costed over $60 bucks and in return giving it to the homeless guy down the street. (That would be after I return the microphone) Least he'll appreciate the gesture. I gave whatever I had leftover to him. Like about $10 for him to get a decent meal.

Originally posted by abeverage

I am materialistic, because I bought the stuff. Why should everything I buy be destroyed by an incorrigible child that has no value of anything? I bought this stuff. I bought my house. I bought everything in the house. My Turkish rugs are destroyed after this child started living here. My bathroom floor is destroyed from her flooding it out.

Feels like, I have to pack everything up and put in my garage until they find their own place.

It's annoying.

LOL you are hilarious! Listen to yourself MY TURKISH RUGS lol millions of people out of work and this bothers you!

Perhaps she is there to teach you somthing about how shallow you are? It is just stuff and everything, EVERYTHING breaks at some point in time but again its just stuff.

Why not take her out to a movie, get to know the person inside this Angry teen who a had an obviously bad upbringing? She is your neice after all and more than that another human being! Find out why she is doing this (unless you are also stupid as well as materialistic) because you will find the answer is ATTENTION!

Feelings of being needed and wanted and not knowing how to express them...HECK take her shopping LOL then both of you can find some commonality in STUFF but maybe, just maybe you create a bond and good memories of an Aunt who cares not a mean one selfish self centered one...

If not are you telling me you value your House, Your Turkish Rugs more than the life and memories of a living being?

I kinda think you are a Funny Troll now...

edit on 3-2-2012 by abeverage because: spelling

I would like to clarify, my daughter did NOT have a bad upbringing and have awful parents who take advantage of people and are lazy. What Manhater doesn't say is my daughter is missing part of her brain. She's been diagnosed as PDD non-specified. She has learning disorders, developmental disorders and oxygen loss at birth. Her IQ is 50, this puts her at moderately retarded )I hate that word). My daughter lives in fantasy world where everyone is wrong but her, everyone is out to get her, everyone is lying... I have tried getting her help for 7 months but this state unfortunately doesn't have much for pediatric mental health. No residential home will take because she is violent, no foster home will take her because she is violent. I've been told by DSS that even if they were to remove her from the home, they'd have no place to PUT her. I am physically tired, emotionally tired, and mentally tired. She is mad because her father left. She told the psych nurse at the ER that "kids sometimes hit their mommies to make their daddies fall in love with them again." He doesn't call her often, maybe once every 3 weeks or so, and in her mind, that's my fault because I should know what's going on in his home. She needs mental health care. It took us until 2 weeks ago to get her a psychiatrist. I was told by his coworker that she doesn't need mental health, but I do. Wha!!! Yes, I'd love therapy. I can't even deal with my separation from last September because I'm too busy dealing with trying to get my daughter the help that she so obviously needs. Please don't take this as a rant, just clarifying some facts. She is 16 going on 5 because of her brain. This is not "bad parenting". I only WISH that were the case. You are welcome to take this info take it for what it's worth. BTW, According to the Sheriff, I CANNOT have her arrested because of her MR/DD, so they don't even bother coming to the house anymore. the hospital doesn't want to deal with her, everyone wants to pass the buck so they don't have to help fix the problem. THAT'S whats been going on. I can't even have her committed until she seriously hurts someone or something, which I understand, but it's making getting her help all the more harder.

If I could give both of you a hug over the internet, I would. I don't know what else to say. If you were in Ca, I could direct you to a ton of resources, but you don't and that doesn't help. Maybe someone on here does know of something in your area or near by.

Originally posted by galadofwarthethird
reply to post by Manhater

 

Spare the rod spoil the child manhater.

But from what I remember your sisters kid is to old and big to spank, but that does not mean you can not do it in some other way to get you point across that you will not tolerate such behavior. If she throws food at you, or breaks your stuff, then it's time to put your foot down, and her mother to. Stuff like this is her job, and she ain't doing it.

If she and her mother are living with you they should have respect for your stuff and your rules. And if you don't have any rules then make some, impose some rules and if they go overboard. Kick them out till they come to there senses, which from what you describe of there situation eventually they will have to. After all they are quests and should know that.

The other night, the child wanted to kill my dog. It's like I can't trust her in my house when I'm not home in fear of her hurting my dog.

NO not mister chi chi bubberrooskies, the kid must be beat with a wet fish till she comes to her senses.

It really sounds like you got problems manhater, this kid is a ball of snakes just waiting to come lose. I would say get her in boot camp or something. But baring that what does this kid do all day? At that age they are crazy, and everything is coming at them. If they don't have some way to release there frustrations and energy's it will turn inward, and as you see make your life a mess.

If she goes to school try to get her into some extra curricular activities, anything and everything to get her in another situation with people she does not know, but knows that she can not play these games with. A change in scenario and habitat will go a long way to changing her mind. Doesn't she have some friends or something, hanging with you and her mother all the time cant be all that good for her.

In fact it just sounds like she is pushing the boundaries because she was not educated any better, and because she knows that she can push the boundaries with you and her mother.

Kid can't dress herself properly.
Kid can't take a shower or bath. And when she does it's Katrina waiting happen.
Kid doesn't clean up after herself. Looks like a tornado in my home.

WTF that is some serious problems you have to deal with manhater. But really discipline is the word and 16 is a transition phase, if not corrected it will just get worse. I would not be in your shoes for all the cheeseburgers in the world manhater.

No mam, sounds like a real headache, and I would smack her or anybody no matter the age if they did all that especially if there breaking my stuff. But she is not young enough to forget such things, so being that direct will probably just make the situation worse, you will have to find a balance somewhere. Or find a way to get them to move on.


Please let me clarify again. My daughter doesn't have personal hygiene skills, but trust me when I say, it's not from lack of trying. She is MR. She doesn't even understand what menstruation is or how to clean it up because her brain is not at that level. Please, think, all of you. Try explaining a cycle to a 5 year old. You're not going to get too far because there is only so much they understand. I have tried grounding her, punishing her, but I get told by manhater to "leave her be to keep her calm". I understand she doesn't like the turmoil, neither do I and I've been dealing with it forever. It took us a long time to find out what was wrong with her. The sheriff's have even told Manhater this is NOT bad parenting, this is her brain and it is damaged. She is missing 250 BILLION nerve fibers in her brain. Think of it as 2 cities that cannot communicate in any way, and both cities are trying to run the state and the state is confused because it doesn't know who to listen to. She is considered to have a split brain because there is no connection from the left half to the right half. So for her, both brains are trying to control her and her body is utterly confused. This is explained to me by her past neurologist who was also treating her for seizure disorder. She is a medical oddity because she is having seizures in both halves of the brain and there is no bridge to cause the seizure to go from one half to the other. In some cases if children have severe seizures doctors will remove that part of the brain to prevent the seizure from going to the other half. In her case, she was born this way. She's very lucky because most children born with agenesis of the corpus callosum will never walk, talk, and have to have a feeding tube the rest of her life. My daughter died 3 times the day she was born. I will sacrifice ANYTHING for my child, but I don't like her being maligned in such a manner.

en.wikipedia.org...reply to post by happyhomemaker29



www.thirteen.org... -of-the-corpus-callosum/7/

Just as an FYI, my daughter operates on a kindergarten to a second grade level but she is in tenth grade thanks to No Child Left Behind. In other words pass them to make them the next teachers problem. I've had my daughter tell me the parents in our past neighborhood told her her parents are lazy because we never taught her to ride a bike. She has balance issues and has to have an adult trike, but those do not come cheap. At age 7 she had to have aquatic therapy just to learn how to toss a ball from one hand to the other. She's been severely delayed speech, physically, etc... and has had those services extensively since she was 3. She lives in imagination world where her imaginary friends tell her what to do. She doesn't have many friends because kids her age don't like to be around her and the ones that do try to take advantage of her. (IE, the past kids in our old neighborhood tried to get her to have sex with everybody on the block!) She prefers to play with toddlers but doesn't understand that their parents don't want her to because she can seriously hurt them when she has a tantrum. A LOT of times, her violence is because she is having a toddler tantrum but is in a 6foot, 150 pound body. And when MR children this age act out, it is like TEN of them coming at you at once.


Split brain

I hope this helps everyone understand what I'm dealing with and no longer thinks that this is a "bratty" teenager. She is so far from teen, it not even funny. I'd KILL for a teen that sneaks out at night that I can ground. If only I were so blessed. No, my daughter will have to be residentialed the rest of her life in a group home and can never learn to drive a car.

reply to post by calstorm


Thank you, I appreciate that. I've been trying to get my daughter resources that she had up in NY, down here on my own, but this state is so bass-ackward that it wasn't until she extensively assaulted me over a 12 hour period and the courts got involved that I was able to get her small services, but she needs extensive, and trust me when I say I'm trying.

It was only a matter time before she busted me. But, I will let make her viewpoints without any recourse or actions from me. There will not be any sibling rivalry from me at all.

Love you sis.

If I didn't love you, I wouldn't be busting my hump to try to help you or her. I would of kicked you to the curb in the first week of coming down here. :hugs: