Sick and tired of the saying "money doesn't buy happiness"

"I've been poor and I've been rich..and now that I know which is which, I'd rather be rich"

But money does not buy happiness...it only gives you choices.

I know lots of rich people who are miserable..because they made the wrong choices with their riches.

Originally posted by MegasAlexandros
reply to post by neobludragon

 

It doesn't, but it helps.

Try this one:

Money doesn't buy happiness,
but in this world, today,
if you have money, you could at least be comfortably unhappy!

Listen first of all I'm glad that nobody has come here to slate you, when I saw the subject title I was worried that there would be people queuing up to be cruel. However, most posters have been pretty kind. Ok we can't see each other but that has to be worth something.

I understand your situation and the way you feel, but it doesn't do you any good to reject out of hand every suggestion that people are making. I would advise you to read the posts over and toy with the idea of doing some of those things, or try to consider how to make the barriers to doing them can be sidestepped.

Friends - I know that feeling from when I was younger but these days we (and you) have the internet. Who is to say that you just have to communicate with people on the internet via text? You can create a skype account can't you? Don't want to reveal your face for some reason? Say you don't have a webcam!

Skype / internet chat is a poor second to real life contact but again the internet can be used to meet people - I don't just mean dating. Once I met a guy on the internet, we had a few shared political interests and a similar backgroun - the guy drove to my house and insisted on buying me drinks until he dropped me home. He was always like that, great guy. I could see that he was lonely too. Now probably you are going to tell me that you live in a small town - doesn't matter. There will be people like you from your town on the internet, just search and keep searching - common interests, local sites etc etc. If your town is really that small then find somebody from a larger town that is closest to your town. That person might come to your town.

Now I don't believe in the sugar / saccharine coated American dream that is portrayed in series like Friends. Hollywood / happy endings are not common in life and nor is real success. However, I do believe that if you really put your mind to something and invest your time in that thing - you will succeed.

I flagged you by the way. Don't usually mention this. Was initially worried that people might be nasty to you. There are ALWAYS people who will want to help / be your friend, you just have to find them.

reply to post by neobludragon


With 500$ you can easily - and frugally - live up to six months in many countries of Africa. By the way some places in Marocco, for example, have just a taste of paradise, as much as many african people are eager to meet the Western man for various mutual benefits ; colorful backpackers are also plenty there overseas, trying a new way of life far from of good ol'Amerika, most of'em trying to make new, genuine western friends met within such fresh, unconditioned conditions... What about packing your bag while focusely thinking about it all ?

Originally posted by neobludragon
I stand by my statement that "money does buy happiness"

It's true that money does not buy happiness. It sounds like your problem isn't a lack of money, it's a lack of friends. I make a lot of money now, but some of my happiest times were when I was barely scraping by- hanging out with friends and having a beer or two, or going to shoot some pool, or all pitching in to get a pizza. No computers, no Internet (it didn't exist then), no cel phones. I've been most happy in life when I've had friends around me and least happy when I was isolated. It didn't have anything to do with how much money I had.

Now granted, if your lack of money results in not being able to pay bills and such then the lack of money can certainly bring grief, but the abundance of money doesn't bring happiness.

reply to post by neobludragon


sounds to me that you want change but aren't willing to work for it, you are the only one at blame my friend.

You are a lucky guy.We all live like gods compared to people in most of the world.Dont worry about your back,I met a 4 year old that had no arms or legs.You are so lucky.You seem like a smart educated guy.You have a family that loves you.Your friends on the internet or no less than if they were in the flesh.Some people have met their life partners online.If you want sex pay for it.Its an honest transaction that you shouldnt be ashamed of.Save up for that,dont go out for a couple months,go see a nice attractive young lady that will massage your bad back and make sure you leave with a smile.Join a dating site and dont get discouraged.Everybody gets rejection sometime or another,it doesnt mean anything.Join a club.Volunteer someplace,maybe you could help someone less fortunate and meet someone at the same time,might be someone you help or another volunteer.Most people have trouble just walking up to a group of strangers and making friends.Put yourself in situations that are more condusive to meeting people.Use your interests.Unless something is stopping you,I would learn how to drive.If you cant drive for some reason,I would get an electric bike or something.Money isnt so great.It rules us.Anyone you need money to meet isnt worth meeting.Actually,the attractive young lady I told you to save for and find will be worth every cent but you dont make friends with money.I find friends are very over-rated.Family is what counts and it sounds like you love your family and they love you.I like the book Huckleberry Finn because its kinda about money and how we are only ever free when we are without it.Jim and Huck were as happy as can be floating down the mississippi river.Money and material things really are false happiness.As long as your basic needs are met you can be happy.You can look at things differently if you try. You really are a lucky guy.

Why do you only have $500 a month? You obviously don't work full time. Why not?

If back pain is your problem, I'd suggest physiotherapy. Saved me from many years of pain and useless chiropractor visits. If you can't afford it, work a second job and make the money to make your own life better. My back problems were lack of flexibility. Once I learned that and started stretching correctly, my back was fine.

Money doesn't buy happines. Once our basic needs for food and shelter are met, the rest is gravy. Friends and family are what makes us happy in life. No friends? Join a charity. It's free and you only have to volenteer your time. You'll meet lots of kind people this way.

reply to post by neobludragon


It damn sure is a good down payment lol

reply to post by neobludragon


To solve problems you need to think of solutions. Make a plan first.

You have to find the root of your problem. You said your main problem right now is no social life, and to have a social life you need money.

You have to find a way to make money. You have internet and I think there are many ways to earn money online.

If you manage a way to make money online then you can buy some cheap clothes online since supposedly all your clothes have holes in them. You can try to buy a cell phone if you don't have a phone in your house.

After that pay your mom the gas to take you to places where you can meet people. If you are very friendly and get to know them well they might invite you to other places.

Friends can also give you rides for free which will help you a lot.

There was a quote somewhere that said that you can't expect something different by doing the same thing.

C'mon mate lighten up.

Money don't buy happiness, it's gets you many material things, that yea.

My nan lives still and tells me stories when they were younger here in spain with 12 brothers and sisters.
Not enough money, not even to buy some butter for the bread, they used oil and garlic (which is nice btw).
My father in law has 9 bros and when they were young there was no money either, here in spain aswell, if they wanted to eat fish, they literally went to the river caught little fishes and ate them. He used to go out and hunt frogs, that was dinner.
When I ask them both when was the happiest times of their lives, they say when they were young.

Money does NOT buy you happiness, trust me.

I know a lot of people with money who are miserable people.

You can buy a lot of things, but you can NEVER buy happiness or love.

You're saying these things because you're depressed, I mean you're saying it yourself.
My advice is to see a professional about it, talk it over, maybe they can help.
Don't dwell on things you haven't got, look at what you have even though it may be little. If not you'll stress yourself out and stress is the biggest killer these days.

Take every day as it comes and believe things will get better. First you have to believe in yourself, the rest comes afterwords.

I hope things work out for you.

Money can buy you happiness..?

..Hell YEAH!

I think it really depends on the individual's circumstances..some people are in situations where money have not necessary buy them happiness.

Maybe platonic happiness..But I'd rather have that, than no happiness..

i really do not believe that any of you who say that money buys happiness actually ever had a real amount of money..

i did and do and no it doesnt...

having less worries does not equal happiness ...

reply to post by neobludragon


I suggest you volunteer somewhere...perhaps more than one place....and even though you have a bad back...there are some volunteer positions you could do.

Also....contact your local library .....there are many free activities.

Go to a free book reading....a poetry slam.....get involved! Seriously...you need to make some effort.

If you participate in the activities that I have suggested....you will make friends.

A lot of money can make life easier (in some ways) as far as paying bills easily and buying things......but money is certainly not a good replacement....for relationships with people.

Money may not "Buy" happiness but you can certainly lease or rent it by the hour.

True Story!

Peace

Originally posted by neobludragon
Reason I say bar is cause that's where most adults go to unwind at least that's what is portrayed on TV and what I've been told.

This part made me lol.

Anyway, I'm a little confused as to your primary topic. Are you ranting about not having friends, or not having money? Because the two aren't always related.

Before I continue, I should point out that I'm an introvert, and quite happy to spend my days alone (although I do have a family whom I love spending time with). So my suggestions may not be as socially-fulfilling as the average person may want.

Use the internet to find friends. You have to be topical of course, but if you can pinpoint some interests that both yourself and others have, then you can find people with similar interests online. Hey, just like ATS! ^__^ If it's a big enough interest, chances are there are groups that meet up, maybe even close to you. You don't have to do that though, taking expenses and a bad back into consideration. Start off with emails. If you find someone you click with, try talking on the phone or even with a webcam. Then, if all goes well, you might be able to work out a compromise to meet somewhere that is convenient to both of you.

reply to post by neobludragon


Hi Neobludragon!!

I feel your pain but YOU are the only one who can change it. It doesnt come from outside, its comes from within. It is not easy but worth the struggle when you finally get there.
There are alot of people living on less than 500$ a month...not easy but they survive. Money will not give you true happiness. That is societys perception. Real friends do not care how much money you have.

Alot of posters have given you some helpful suggestions to move forward but you use the same excuses every time. Try and change the tune.

Please take a look at this video. Whenever I feel down or upset with my life , I love to look at this. It helps me realign and realise that if I put my mind to it there are NO obstacles in my way only ones I create myself through fear, Its makes me realise what I can achieve not what I cannot.

YOU CAN HAVE AS MANY FRIENDS AS YOU WANT. ITS UP TO YOU TO GET OFF YOUR SORRY ASS.

www.youtube.com...

I hope you enjoy it my friend.

J.

reply to post by Acetradamus


Well, I don't think most people are talking about having LOTS of money when they equate it to happiness, but just enough to live comfortably. Enough to pay the bills, save a little, maybe go out to eat or to the movies a couple times a month.

Lack of transportation = crippling in itself
Living in pain, I totally relate.
Having family, while you love them, are genetically connected - doesn't mean they're the best people to be around.

You really only have 2 options.

Love the life you're living, or live for your next endorphin, hoping its enough to get you through to the one after.

The internet is vast. There really aren't any limitations. There is something here that will either make you happy, or keep you busy till the next "happy" stops by.


Learn a programming language, learn to do artwork, find a game, watch a movie, do research, write a book - even if it sucks. Any activity you immerse yourself in brings the prospect of meeting someone you have something in common with. There's no reason for them to be there, in your house. Font friends are just as real as Flesh friends.

In fact, I prefer my font friends. We have much more in common on an intellectual level.

To find flesh friends, you have to sort through many just to find one good one... it really isn't fun... and its not as easy as some of these posters make it out to be and we both know it.


I agree - Money can buy you happiness, moreso if you're happy with yourself already. If you're not happy with yourself, money can still buy you some endorphins that make you think you're happy.

/implying that happiness is friends, going out, buying better food and a new television.
I'm sorry but from where I stand you're an uneducated soul.

Be negative all you want, it'll only make you less happy.