Can you help a lady with her: Puppy?

I have to leave for work, so I won't beback until morning. I was hoping to hear something, but I'm sure Gracie is very emotional right now.....Gracie, I sent you a u2u.....(((((hugs)))))

reply to post by silo13


Here is my opinion, silo:

Do what in your heart you feel is best. But please do as much research as you can before making any final decision. It would be very difficult to live with yourself afterward if you decided to put her down and then you did some research just to find out there was actually hope.

But regardless of what your decision is in the end, silo, I... we... shall accept it as our own. I do wish there was something I could do or say that would change all of this, I know how our pets can be like children to us, but other than the power of prayer there is unfortunately nothing I can do.

So like I said the decision is yours to make. Whatever that decision is you have our unwavering support.

I feel so sorry for you and the difficult decision you have to make. For what it's worth let me say this to you...
If you were seriously ill would you want to spend your last moments in the place you loved and called home with those you cared for or in a hospital bed surrounded by strangers?
Dogs are not pets they are family! Bring her home, wrap her in a blanket and place her in front of the fire where she's warm and then wait to see what happens. If she passes away at least its at home with the people she loved. If she recovers, well miracles do happen...
"Give her the chance of life. Don't treat her as an animal, treat her as you would family because that's what she is... "

Edit: Aww, I just read page 7... so I guess my hopes for Lucy's recovery that I posted here should be edited.

It's always hard to lose a dog. Scratch that, a best friend. Because dogs totally are man's best friend. And from what I can see, you were definitely a great best friend to Lucy too.

At least Lucy's suffering wasn't at the hands of a malicious human who poisoned her, but rather a sickness. Obviously neither one is a good thing, but at least now you don't have to worry that there is a neighbor near you who is out to do harm.



Since I'm awful at responding appropriately to sad things, I'll just end with a comical doggie picture:

[atsimg]http://files.abovetopsecret.com/images/member/4e0478a5755d.jpg[/atsimg]

Because it's totally appropriate for doggies to reverse spoon cuddle.


I'll be sure to keep you and Lucy in my prayers

Quick update then I'll get back to Lucy.

I read through the new messages and again find myself humbled and thankful for all your care and thoughts.
I know that's quick and doesn't say enough, but honestly even if I had an hour to write I don't think I'd ever find words to say 'thank you' all and truly explain how much you all have helped.

About distemper. I haven't done so much reading about it yet - I have some - but not as much as I will.

Why?

Because Lucy isn't 'Lucy' anymore. Her neurological problems have changed her so much it's like Lucy's already gone. Does that make it easier for me? It should but it doesn't.
As for Lucy - She doesn't smile anymore (yes she pulled back the corner of her lips in a doggy smile).
She doesn't 'wiggle' when she's happy because she isn't she's just 'there'.
She's not lethargic anymore - She walks around (circles a lot) and has developed a small head tick but she's up and around, drinking, eating, etc, but her eyes don't register anything - Lucy just isn't 'there' anymore.
It's like that last hard seizure took her spirit away.
I hesitate to use this word on ATS but yes it's like I'm living with a 'Lucy-Zombie'...

So my choices are to drug her up and to wait for her next seizure.
The vet says she may recover (that 50/50 chance Kat spoke of) - but recovery just means she breaths. It doesn't mean she returns to being 'Our Lil Lucy'. Funny enough he didn't offer her any anti-seizure drugs like in that States - so he's pretty much just a barbaric touch hole. (Is that against T&C? I hope not)... At least in another country he'd give her Valium, etc, but nooooo he's - 'Lucy will live, or she'll die - in writhing pain and agony.'

A Lucy 'recovery' also means the wait. Waiting for the next time she's stressed - and flips into another seizure.

For those of you who's never witnessed a puppy seize I hope and pray with all my heart you NEVER EVER DO.
It's one of the worst things I've ever experienced in all my years of having animals, etc.

So no, I can't just wait around for 'Lucy-who-is-not-Lucy' to have another huge convulsion and die under such horrific circumstances. The better choice for Lucy is to just let her slip away.

Can I do that? I don't know. If my ride doesn't show tonight (they pulled back their offer for a ride if the storm keeps up) - then yes, I'll let her slip away. If the ride shows I'll take her to the vet and let the vet do it. I'll probably never forgive myself for putting her through the stress of the ride, but actually, the ride back wasn't as bad for her as the ride there the first time, so, maybe she'll do fine this time and I'm reading too much into it.

Between now and then - if the storm lets me - I'll be on and off all day when Lucy is sleeping.

Again, thank you all and I'll come back and re-read more when she's taking a snooze.

peace and love to you all
gracie

reply to post by silo13


Oh no so very sad. Pray for an answer! Sit there and pray/meditate for the right thing to do immediately. Ask for an answer in hurry to do what is best for Lucy. She must be comfortable no matter what you decide. If you decide to let her slip away see if you can get pain killers with codeine for Lucy. I have some strong pain killers for dogs in my cupboard but I live in Australia but could try to post over to you? Not sure about the international laws though. Dose Lucy up on asprin, wait until she is asleep maybe - the asprin will make her blood very thin. Make sure if you do this that you could have a male friend there or some one who is strong in the mind and do it for you and stay with you until it is all over. You poor girl!

reply to post by Australiana

Thank you for understanding - that's just so 'enough'. Along with some others here - you people really do understand.

My computer is in a loft, my house is one room, very tiny. I can look down on Lucy from where I am and keep constant watch on her (for convulsions, when she wakes, etc). At the moment she's awake but just lying on the bed shivering. I usually only use wood heat but I've no more dry wood so I hooked up a butane space heater (the gas I usually use for my stove burners) and now she's got heat. She's still shivering.

Why I'm going into so much detail is only because I'm upset.

Why? Because now in these last few minutes with Lucy I know beyond a shadow of a doubt the best thing for her is to 'go to sleep'. Over the last hour she's gone from looking at me and being terrified of me to a look of concern, then a whine, then almost like she remembers me - until the pain/tremors kick in again. Watching her going through these stages of confusion is just NOT RIGHT! I love her more than I can say - but what does that really mean? That means doing what I can to make sure she does NOT suffer, and at the moment I have no doubt she is suffering.

On to your 'aspirin' suggestion. I'm afraid if I load her up on aspirin it will hurt her stomach before it can achieve the required effect of blood thinning and then she'll convulse. Maybe it wouldn't happen but I can't take the chance.

If I open her IV - while she's sleeping - at some point it will still coagulate up - and I can't take the chance of her only bleeding-out half way and that causing a convulsion.

If I was in the States I'd use a .22 and - enough said. She'd never know. (Of course I'd wait until she was sleeping). But that's not a possibility either.

Your suggestion of medication? Well, I'd no sooner ask you or anyone else to break the law but my thanks are profound and lasting.

I don't know if I have a household product I could inject into her IV - so that is a no no no - I will not take chances on causing her more pain and I'd never ever try to play 'guinea pig' with her. Sure, I know that's NOT what you're saying, I'm just rambling as I think through the whole process.

As for someone here for me? I appreciate the thought but all my friends and family are living in another country - here, it was just me, then for a short time me and Lucy... Well you get the idea.

So for now I'll just keep her as warm and comfortable and tranquil as possible.

On the other hand I just remembered. I have about 12 Valiums I was given for a plane trip. Never used a one of them but didn't turn them down - you never know when something like that will come in handy. So yeah, I've got 12 Valium, they're old but the pack is unopened. I suppose I could check the internet to see if that's enough to help Lucy along... But No... Again... I can't risk the chance of doing something I know nothing about and having her pay the price. I'd rather just wait for the vet - horrific, but the fact of the situation at hand.

Thank you or listening and for 'being there'...

peace

reply to post by silo13


Hi hon....after reading your post with more details, I think you're right. From everything I read, they say that once the tremors, seizures, and tics start, it's too late for treatment. I would much rather know she slipped away peacefully than to suffer anymore. You have done all you can do sweetheart.....I say this with great sorrow, but it is time to let go. If you can not get to the vet, the valium would work ....she would just go to sleep and not wake up. But if you can get to the vet, that would be the best thing. Will he charge you a lot? When I asked my vet how much it would be for Hiedi, it was 65 dollars. If you can't afford it, I say use the valium and just lay down next to her and hum or talk to her softly until she stops breathing. I will check on the doses for you....how old are the valiums? I'm just broken hearted over this....but you are doing the right thing. I wish I were closer to you, I would come to your house and be there with you. But I will be here if you need to talk....just U2U me......((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

reply to post by silo13


Do you have friends and family nearby Silo?
I hope you are not going through this alone-I know you have our support,but you need to be around friends and loved ones at a time like this.

I really feel for you as one of my dogs had to be put to sleep when she developed siezures.
No matter how bad you feel now,and if the worst does happen,know that you will not always feel this bad,and you will always have the knowledge that it was you who saved beautiful Lucy and gave her a life of love and happiness.

No one can take away the good memories,and in time the bad memories will fade.

I wish there was something more I could do to help.

Kat, Silicone and the rest...
I've spent the day with Lucy and no, there is no doubt.
It's time for her to go.
It's 1600 now and the rain has let up so I presume the ride to the vet is still on.

To answer your question Silicone, no I'm alone here - but with all the help from people here on ATS and a friend via Skype I'll get through - with God too, I haven't forgotten Him at all. I think He's just jealous and wants a good dog for Himself. Well, he's about to get one.

I so wish I could use the Valium but with it being out of date I'm just too worried about it not working (4 years old).

Anyway, it's about time to go get changed and get her ready... Just wanted to tell you all thank you and what was going on with our Lucy.

love and thanks to you all
gracie

So sorry you and Lucy have had to go through this.
You did your best.
At least she will be at peace now.
Poor little Lucy.

reply to post by silo13


Silo, thank you for the update, as hard as it is for you it is very appreciated by the rest of us. Like Stealthy I wish I was close by and could give you some much needed support through this, the assistance I offer seems to be so inadequate. But I will continue to send prayers for both of you and hope that in some way helps to comfort you both. This next statement is not an empty offer, U2U me if you would like, as I said before sometimes there are things better said in a more personal communication. Give Lil Lucy a good kiss on the top of the head and a scratch behind the ears for us and let her know that she is very much loved by people all over the world and know that you are as well.

I am so so sorry to hear about Lucy, I've been in tears reading these last few pages and I can't find the words to express how sad I feel for you and Lucy, my thoughts are with you.

I'm sorry that this isn't working out the way that we'd all hoped and that there is no-one close to you.

I can only echo what everyone else is saying. You did your best in very difficult circumstances and prior to that you gave a little dog a life that she couldn't have dreamed of when she was lying abandoned in that ditch.

Please focus as much as you can on the positive parts of your experiences with Lucy. There are so many happy memories, how sweet she looked in her little bandana and how helpful she was around the garden. Thank you for sharing those.

I can only offer you my heartfelt support.

I am so sad about Lucy, but I am also glad she will not have to suffer anymore. I made this video for you Gracie, for you to keep so that Lucy can live on forever, and you can see her when ever you want to. I will never forget her........this video was not meant to be sad, rather it is a celebration of her life. You made her so happy while she was here, and that is what you have to remember.....you gave her your all, and she was happy....remember her that way (((((hugs))))))

sounds like you are in route to vet which looks to be best option all things considered, however if the ride or whatever does'nt go through here is just one DIY at home dog euthanasia link and there are a few others, suggest a friend doing though if so

From an article in USA Today:

“It’s not something people should do,” he warns. “There’s a reason veterinarians go to college for eight years.” Anyone without that training doesn’t understand “there’s nuance and many details to consider” when putting an animal down peacefully, including age, size, condition and other matters. Furthermore, untrained people “have no secondary systems to fall back on” if something unexpected happens.

(A quick Google search brought up these pretty detailed instructions for building a CO2 chamber for euthanizing a small pet: Small animal euthanasia at home.)

I can understand why owners might prefer their pets to draw their final breath at home, in familiar surroundings, but the risk of further suffering by doing it yourself just seems too great. Plus, humane societies and animal shelters offer options for reasonable fees. (The Animal Protective Foundation, for example, euthanizes dogs for $50.) blog.timesunion.com...

it's never an easy decision for anyone I'm sure, this is the last pet I had put to sleep- scrotie (tell me about it , I did'nt name her though, should have seen grandma's reaction), after about a month of her on and off yelping when getting up or down etc. and once convinced there was no getting better it was an immediate response also and if not for the convenience of an affordable animal hospital, I would have ended her pain another way, she was an excellent frisbee catcher in her prime and Zaks best friend growing up, lots of good memories playing at the lake together

I can't say more than this right now - other than thank you all with all my heart.

I'll post tomorrow about the whole ordeal, I just can't relive it right now.

What's important is Lucy is out of pain, confusion and is at peace...

Now for peace on all of you...

With sincerity, appreciation and a grand new respect for you members of ATS...

peace

[atsimg]http://files.abovetopsecret.com/images/member/f59858e39439.jpg[/atsimg]

reply to post by silo13


Get some rest hon, and come back when you're ready. Your video is set to private so I couldn't watch it.....you did the right thing.

Look after yourself. Times will be tough for a good while yet.

Well done for seeing things through. I know exactly how you feel, just don't neglect yourself. If you find it hard to eat, set a time each day when you have to eat something whether or not you feel like it. That way you will eat out of habit and a lack of appetite won't matter. You'll expect food and so you'll eat.

Just allow yourself to grieve and don't entertain any recriminations. You did your best.

And don't be afraid to cry in the dark, get it all out until you sleep.

Write when you feel up to it. Hopefully if will help.