The Geek’s Guide To Getting Girls

As I untangled her thong from my glasses, I realized I was face-to-face with the dual nature of the human female: a paradox wrapped inside an enigma who is perpetually exasperated that guys “just don’t get it.” For centuries, male minstrels have romanticized their own cluelessness in sonnets and songs, and we transhumanist males should salute them, because these prancing poets were proto-nerds bereft of the benefits of endocrinology.

Source

Here is another great article I found over at H+. Despite it's name, this article is actually packed with science that explains what women truly look for when selecting a mate. Combining psychology with biology, it goes into detail why females seem just downright paradoxical most of the time. The part I found most interesting was towards the end when it talks about sexual selection and how our brains may have evolved to the point they are today, not because they made us more fit, but because males who were smarter simply turned our female ancestors on more.

I appreciate the effort, but I think you picked the wrong forum to bring this up... no conspiracy here.

The biggest problem a lot of "geeks" have is that they never have the courage to ask certain women out. They might be surprised at the response they got if they did.

reply to post by AlreadyGone


I brought this up because it involves a lot of psychology and since one of the focuses of this board is psychology, I figured people would be interested in reading about some of the evolutionary and psychological steps that brought us to where we are today. Despite the title of the article, it is a well-thought out piece with a lot of scientific backing that strikes at the heart of the human psyche, since sex does play such an important role in our modern society.

reply to post by AlreadyGone

I appreciate the effort, but I think you picked the wrong forum to bring this up... no conspiracy here.

What the hell you on about, thats the greatest conspiracy of all time womankind. Womankind has been confusing us & mankind has been trying to figure them out since the dawn of time (and visa versa). Just when you think you finally figured your woman out she'll do something that flips your whole hypothesis about her, on it's head. To tell the truth thats part of what makes them so wonderful.[besides the obvious]

Any man who says he understands truly women is either a fool or a ficken liar.



[edit on 17-4-2010 by acrux]

Originally posted by AlreadyGone
I appreciate the effort, but I think you picked the wrong forum to bring this up... no conspiracy here.

I really hate these kinds of responses. Where does it state on this website that any post absolutely MUST be a conspiracy?

Do you even know what the definition of conspiracy is? (without using google dictionary). I think this is a great post, highly interesting and amusing!

A sure change from the steaming crud conspiracy's of Reptilian alien illuminati Hilary Clinton shape shifting hocus pocus. Not to mention the op has placed this post in the correct thread topic of psychology

I just skimmed over the article but I saw what I was looking for: confidence.

That's the biggest "secret." Just be freaking confident in yourself.


The stereotype goes like this:

Women want men to provide for them, shelter, security, a sense of warmth, a person to calm their nerves, console them, etc. The more of this you can provide the better. Be calm and collected, don't worry about things and get all wrapped up in being nervous. They can read that. They like confidence.

And also don't overdo it, coming on too strong to someone. If you're blatantly hitting on a girl around her friends it can embarrass her and she'll just think you're a creep trying your damnedest to get laid. Then again depending on the girl maybe that's all you want and it'll work.


Also something about girls who are cocky about the way they look, know they're hot, think they can get any guy they want, etc. Ever heard the stereotype/joke about how if you treat a girl like trash it just makes her fall for you more? I think that's in reference to these types. Since they're so self-assured and confident about themselves, if you don't fawn all over them like they expect, like most guys do, they seem to think they're not worthy of you and try more to get you. Pay attention to them like you would anyone else, just act romantically disinterested in them. If there's a natural connection anyway then it'll come through on its own.

Sorry if you're a girl and reading that offends you. It's not all girls though. It just means you're not one of the cocky ones.

[edit on 17-4-2010 by bsbray11]

Originally posted by SpeakerofTruth
The biggest problem a lot of "geeks" have is that they never have the courage to ask certain women out. They might be surprised at the response they got if they did.

Excellent Post.

I will write a 200 page book on How To Meet Girls.

In it will be the same sentence on every page.

"Walk up, and say Hello"

and these girl think a man dosnt have emotions? that he dosnt have problems? what about bills? the carreer? personal problems? providing?
dont man have mental problems and worries too?
are we supposed to be some kinda IRONMAN.
in the end the geeks always end up with hot models and money,and the cool guis from school ruin theyr lifes (: especialy the prom queens from school

Originally posted by bsbray11
I just skimmed over the article but I saw what I was looking for: confidence.

That's the biggest "secret." Just be freaking confident in yourself.




[edit on 17-4-2010 by bsbray11]

If you read the article, it mentions how confidence can't be faked. There's acting confident and actually being confident, and they are two very, very different things.

Originally posted by Sean48

Originally posted by SpeakerofTruth
The biggest problem a lot of "geeks" have is that they never have the courage to ask certain women out. They might be surprised at the response they got if they did.

Excellent Post.

I will write a 200 page book on How To Meet Girls.

In it will be the same sentence on every page.

"Walk up, and say Hello"

It think that would be called "How to say Hi to a woman"

What's the next book going to be called?

Being a woman, I'm not going to bore you with any how too's.
I am going to tell you about a young woman I worked with while
I lived in NYC.
She was just breathtakingly beautiful.
She and I became very good friends, still are today actually.
Ok...on with the story, this woman was so beautiful that when
we walked down the street, people would actually stop and
just stare at her when we walked by.
She never had many dates and really did like intellectual guys,
but none of them ever asked her out, because they couldn't get
past her face to even talk with her.
She became quite reclusive after awhile, because of
all of the attention and confided in me many times that
while she was being looked at
she always thought they saw her flaws , not her beauty.

Guys, Talk to the girl you think would never give you the time of day
You may be pleasently surprised!



[edit on 4/17/2010 by Ex]

huh?? you make no sense

Originally posted by SpectreDC
If you read the article, it mentions how confidence can't be faked. There's acting confident and actually being confident, and they are two very, very different things.

Yeah, I didn't say fake it. I said be confident.

Well, I'm far from a geek, but anyway - to me it is obvious when a girl and I have a connection. I think it starts with the eye contact. You lock eyes several times without saying anything and if you see her smile or something like that you know there is definitely a connection... =) I usually just smile back and if shes the one who smile first it makes it a lot easier for me to say " Hi" as I admit I am very Shy. Also, small talk doesn't hurt any. Get to know the girl and just be really nice to her.

I'll never forget when I was 22; I had a crush on this girl named Amanda - she was 24. Anyway, she was a waitress at this place and from the first time I lay eyes on her I had a crush. We would always small talk and I was really just trying to get to know her... After a while we started working together and this one night I broke down and asked her for her number. I'll never forget her reaction - she broke down and started crying right infront of me because she was already taken but didn't wanna hurt my feelings! Man... did I ever feel so bad after that. I went home and started to cry cause I felt so bad over making a girl cry... And the next morning I'll never forget when I woke up it literally felt like my heart hurt... I swear to god... there was pain in my heart... like it was broken... I dunno if it was God pulling on my heart strings or if it was just the fact that I had so many emotions wrapped up in this girl for months leading up to that night...


Anyways, my best advice to you guys is just be yourself and have fun. Smile, be friendly, start a conversation about anything, and definitely, definitely, make her laugh! And if it doesn't work out who cares... like my mom always tell me there's a million fish in the sea... =))

Good luck!

actually how is a guy supposed to just muster up the confidence to talk to a girl he has pretty much no business talking to out of the blue when they make themselves out to be very unapproachable? Yes I'm saying women always have this impenetratable shield that only either deceptive tactics could get through or dominating tactics until she 'submits', because they always say that they have to be Captive to some domineering set of traits that pretty much make them unable to act in free will.

The fact is, it's hjard for a guy to just walk up to a girl and say hello when the only reason he might want to is because she looks like she would be great in bed. Oh and did I mention she would also have a great personality, in bed? It's not that I dont care about your personality. In fact I care more about personality than anything else, but I do have needs too. And even when you say you want a sweet guy who cares for you, what you say and what you do are 9 times out of 10 very different. Because you say you are proud to go on feelings, and not be logical about anything whatsoever. Even if it's wrong and deceptive. You don't. You want a Badass. As innocent as you may want to portray it, you don't really want anything else but the badass, and the brute. At least that's what my reality has shown me. Either that or purely superficial qualities, which will amount to badassness. What you want is violence. You want men who violently dominate other men. You are attracted to brutality. I've seen it time and time again.

Yea, so please women, help us out. When we are labelled criminals, jerks, douchebags, dogs, perverts, etc. for being human and respecting women, then you go out with some brash hardcore gangster who doesn't care about you or doesn't care if you are offended by his dirty jokes which if coming from a guy who actually does care would be offensive and perverse, even if he said something way less 'offensive and perverse' than the brute who get's his ass kissed.

When the media portrays to you that good men are no longer any good, and that only the brute who steps on other's heads get the women, that you have to be evil to succed it's kind of hard. It's kinda of hard, knowing that your kind, being that you are a free thinker can't fit in with society because it takes one to be evil to succeed. Or that we need to be materialistic and selfish and egoist.

No offense. It's not just because we don't ask you out. It's just that in spite of all the above I said, you expect us to do ALL the work from initiating a simple conversation because you want to test how "brave we are in not caring whether we come off as sexually aggressive" or how bad we can be with you to test how far you can go to do us wrong, and providing you with the entire world because you bore yourself. You test us unecessarily, and for things that would in the end not matter vs the things that really do matter. You want to come up with a million ideas and categorize us because all of your lives you've been judging us to no end because you feel you have a right to either breed us in or out of existence or to abominate us, and have us outcast.

Guess what rules now? It seems that evil rules. Evil runs this darwinist society of kill or be killed. Man against man, for what, in the end? To allow for replication. And you are impressed by brutal competition.

But us men never suffer, we're not allowed to. We're not allowed to show it either, therefore any problems become hidden under the mat. If we show that we have any imperfection we are up for a most cruel dehumanizing demise and we are outcast.

?

I'm very sorry. I'm just really hurt. I'm probably going to end up being a lifelong celibate and alone because the times we are in are just too damn crazy for a "different kind of person" like me who's expected to be everything I haven't been able to thus yet.

I may just be forever scarred.

[edit on 17-4-2010 by The Quiet Storm]

Originally posted by Sean48

"Walk up, and say Hello"

Really that is the "secret." Though, it is often a lot easier said that done for us socially "retarded" folk.

reply to post by The Quiet Storm


Women are strange. I'll give you that. I have seen this with my own two eyes. A female would rather go out with a guy who beats on them and treats them like # than they would a DECENT guy who treats them like a woman is supposed to be treated. I have seen it and dealt with it all of my life.

reply to post by Ex


You pretty much just reaffirmed what I said previously. Being a guy, I can tell you that I have missed the boat and seen many other guys miss the boat because they didn't have the balls to approach a woman. It's sad, but like the old saying goes, "If you don't approach her, you can bet some other guy will."

Confidence is very important.

Challenge is even more important.

Telephone is only used to set a date.

Be the first to walk away.

Wait a week before calling her.

Don't call on Friday or Saturday.

No gifts until there is a reason.

Be important. Respect yourself. Shave and shower. Dress clean and simple.

Don't brag. They don't like to feel as if they are being bought.

Don't drive like a maniac. Remember that her comfort level must always be paramount.

Ask her questions. Let her do the talking. Remember the answers. Ask her other questions based on those answers. She'll love you for being the only guy who has never tuned her out.