Hilarious (if possible) Descriptions of the 5 Most Horrifying Bugs in the World...By Alex Levinton

I know there may be debate on where to put this, but in the end, all is factual, even for the superlatives and hilarious descriptions. This is like a science magazine written by just some normal guy after work...a few pieces in the quotes - check out the full piece below.
by Alex Levinton:

Japanese Giant Hornet (vespa mandarinia japonica)

From: Japan, obviously.

Why you must fear it:
It's the size of your thumb and it can spray flesh-melting poison. We really wish we were making that up for, you know, dramatic effect because goddamn, what a terrible thing a three-inch acid-shooting hornet would be, you know? Oh, hey, did we mention it shoots it into your eyes? Or that the po More..ison also has a pheromone cocktail in it that'll call every hornet in the hive to come over and sting you until you are no longer alive?

Think you can outrun it? It can fly 50 miles in a day. It'd be nice to say something reassuring at this point, like "Don't worry, they only live on top of really tall mountains where nobody wants to live," but no, they live all over the goddamned place, including outside Tokyo.

www.liveleak.com...

ColoradoJens

[edit on 11-11-2008 by Crakeur]

Great post, can't wait to read the rest of them.


[edit on 11-11-2008 by pavil]

Just type "human bot fly" in google and look for the videos. Ugh.

reply to post by ColoradoJens

This is maybe 30 wasps against 30,000 bees and the 30,000 bees do not stand a chance.
Behold the hornets systematically seize them with huge, wicked jaws and literally #ing cut them apart, one by one by one by #ing one. In three hours, there are piles of limbs and heads and just #ing bits of things that could possibly have been alive at one point, and the hornets have stormed the hive and flown away with all the bee's children. Who will then be eaten.

Not so fast these cheeky honey bees have a great countermeasure against those ghastly child eating giant hornets!
notexactlyrocketscience.wordpress.com...

Asian honeybees have developed a remarkable defence called ‘heat-balling’ against their local hornet, Vespa velutina. A giant ball of bees piles onto the predator, weighing it down while vibrating their wing muscles. The frenetic activity greatly increases the temperature inside the ball to about 45C - hot enough to cook the hornet alive, but five degrees under the bees’ maximum tolerated temperature.

Here some footage of the ensuing carnage:

And heres some of the honey bees kicking some ass:


Great post BTW


[edit on 02/10/08 by karl 12]

Originally posted by pavil
Just type "human bot fly" in google and look for the videos. Ugh.

I thought that one was going to be mentioned.
I guess not, I can't remember exactly what it does, but I didn't like it.
www.liveleak.com...

[edit on 11-11-2008 by Toadmund]

ughhhhhhhhhhguhuguuhguhuhguhguugggggggggghh
that was one of the most horrid things i have ever seen didnt know that mozzy bites could do that

Ouch. I can personally attest to the pain of the bullet ant, having sat (yes, you read that correctly) in the midst of an entire troupe of them. We were sitting down for a nice little lunch in the middle of nowhere in Africa, and lo and behold, someone suddenly shouts "Oh my god!", pointing directly at me. The rest is a blur of clothes flying off and utter terrifying, sweaty panic. Those little bastards actually burrow themselves into your clothing in the hopes of reaching skin. And apparently, the branch that resides in the Amazon is even worse. Thank god we don't have any insects that god-awful in my primary locale.

I watched the National Geographic Taboo episode that showed the coming-of-age tribal practice involving the bullet ant mittens. It was incredibly painful to watch. The poor guys were lined up, awaiting their turn for self-inflicted torture. They were amazingly resilient, though--I don't know how long I would have lasted before passing out or entirely succumbing to the pain.

reply to post by paperplanes


You gotta love it when someone screams "Oh my God!" pointing at you and everyone else starts running for it. So then after the attack, how was the nature hike?

ColordoJens

makes the russian vampire moth seem quite innocent really by comparisson

Originally posted by ColoradoJens
reply to post by paperplanes

 

You gotta love it when someone screams "Oh my God!" pointing at you and everyone else starts running for it. So then after the attack, how was the nature hike?

ColordoJens

Luckily, someone decided to run over and help me tear my clothes off (funny, I never thought those words could have such an awful tone to them...). Needless to say, it was a bonding experience. There's nothing like a rescue from large, vicious, angry ants to really endear you to another person.

Thank you for the laugh,

That is possibly some of the funniest stuff I've read in a long time.

Edit to add: I'm in tears right now reading the rest of that article. This is getting posted to myspace.

Edit: I had to quit eating breakfast because I almost choked.

[edit on 11-11-2008 by mf_luder]

[edit on 11-11-2008 by mf_luder]

Originally posted by paperplanes

Luckily, someone decided to run over and help me tear my clothes off (funny, I never thought those words could have such an awful tone to them...).

i dunno it still has a lot to do with who is helping rip them off and who is offering to help with the aplication of soothing cream afterwards


if its a large hairy man theres deffinately an awful tone in there

how do bullet ants scream anyway? i thought insects didnt have the ability to make vocal calls

you know when your knee deep in acid poop, when the locals start running, like the time my dad was in a bus in africa and this huge bee came happily buzzing in, and the locals went happily buzzing out......at about 50 mph.......

Great post I'm still laughing because,I don't live near theses things .I guess if I did I would carry a blowtorch with me everywhere I went ,no actually I would just move

When I was a kid we used to avoid this rare insect that looked something like a large furry ant,They called them cowkillers,and if you step on them the pain is excruciating .

Here's is a site you might like there is a true account of potato bug encounters page so funny,potato bugs

Thanks all for the replies - it is always great to learn about nature through the eyes of Joe everyday, as I call this guy. Perhaps his approach will endeavor children to learn more about these horrific killing machines, in the hopes of one day making some chemical that can be used to blast them into oblivion (sarcastic - ease up!) I love the fact we are so scared of these amazing bugs. Anything that makes one aware, I guess. Here is a story that sums up peoples' fear of bees in particular:

Single Bee Sends Gathering of Humans into Helpless Panic
The Onion June 16,2007

DALLAS—A western honeybee measuring barely one-quarter of an inch in length and weighing approximately .03 ounces triggered panic among a gathering of six fully-grown Homo sapiens during a picnic at Davis Park on Monday, witnesses reported.

"Where is it—where is it?" said 44-year-old general manager Charles Freid, who has been described by his coworkers and business rivals as "ruthless," after the bee happened to fly in his general direction. "Get it off me! Is it on me?"

"Jesus!" added Freid, screaming and flailing his arms as he raced to his car, got inside, and locked the doors.

The college-educated humans, all of whom are not allergic to bee-sting venom and possess both cerebral and muscular capacities several orders of magnitude beyond that of the insect, proceeded to retreat in abject fright from its half-millimeter stinger, which, when used, causes a twinge of discomfort followed by mild irritation and kills the bee.

Airline pilot Mike Grunwold, 49, who is approximately 1,224 times the size of the bee, said that he was "certain" the bee had landed on Sakko's back. Fiber tests on Sakko's clothing later found no traces of a bee's presence, but did reveal a small piece of lint and matted hair that may have resembled an insect at a distance and in certain lights.

Civil engineer, marathon runner, and Gulf War veteran Scott Fogel, 39, briefly attempted to use force against the bee's non-aggressive actions, waving it away with a paper plate. After accidently upending a container of potato salad, which caused the bee to suddenly swerve, Fogel leaped back several feet and dashed for cover behind a trash can.

"They're attracted to sweat," Fogel said. "It makes them want to kill. Just try to keep as far away from it as you can."

After the bee seemingly disappeared, the humans—members of a species that has crossed an Ice Age land bridge from Asia to North America, domesticated the wolf, built the pyramids, and landed a manned vehicle on the surface of the moon—walked cautiously back to the picnic area.

"I think it's gone," personal trainer Marcus Weller, 32, said. "Thank God."

www.theonion.com...

ColoradoJens

[edit on 12-11-2008 by ColoradoJens]

Wow, that was scary stuff...

But I don't worry too much.
The Spiders from Mars will eat the stupid bugs.
Ha!

reply to post by ColoradoJens


and the sad thing is you know this happens on a regular basis as well as running and screaming at the sight of a spider in countries that dont have anything close to a poisonous(to humans) spider like here in the UK

reply to post by ColoradoJens


Jens, that honeybee article is the best thing I've read in a long time--Dostoevsky and Tolstoy can suck it.



[edit on 12/11/08 by paperplanes]

A lot of years ago in Arizona I looked in my backyard and saw a gargantuan bug ,I was black like a huge beetle about the size of a beer bottle and it was so huge it was stomping down sticks an leaves as it walked . I was horrified and made up my mind I was never going in my backyard again I did stay out for about a month

That is the funniest and scariest thing I have ever read. I never intend on leaving my country again although I am sure we have some scary stuff in the US.