I'm 28 years old, I've never had a girlfriend or kissed anyone ever

a reply to: anobody

go for it you got nothing to lose and alot to gain

originally posted by: SlowNail
a reply to: anobody

Perhaps you're trying too hard. Be happy, crack a joke and don't be afraid to make a fool of yourself. A girl loves to laugh. In my experience, nothing will knock her off her feet quicker than a guy who's not afraid to look stupid to put a smile on her face.

I love laughing. There is actually a girl that makes me laugh all the time like no other girl does lol. Well she's part of family friends but she isn't into me, unfortunately. I do think that we would make a great couple sometimes but few years ago I was depressed and stressed so I guess I kind of scared her off. Guess I'll have to find someone exactly like her, perhaps...

I do lots of volunteer work, my intentions aren't to meet women at all but there is always beautiful women every where volunteering. They will know your genuine and you have something in common. Or, like someone above me said, find a passion and follow it, something that involves getting out there, and the right person will eventually fall in to place.
Just have a good sense of humor and find something in common with people around you while you're out and you can end up making friends with people and go from there. I'm sure if you give an effort and aren't afraid of getting shut down a few times, you'll be good to go.
Tonight i volunteered with big brothers and sisters of Massachusetts at the Boston Celtics Game and randomly got paired with a beautiful woman my age(about your age) and we got to hit it off and interact with people and we had a great time together.
Volunteer for something you care about and don't even think of it for meeting woman. Make yourself the person you think women would like. Don't say oh why don't woman like me. Give them a reason to like you.

originally posted by: anobody

originally posted by: SlowNail
a reply to: anobody

Perhaps you're trying too hard. Be happy, crack a joke and don't be afraid to make a fool of yourself. A girl loves to laugh. In my experience, nothing will knock her off her feet quicker than a guy who's not afraid to look stupid to put a smile on her face.

I love laughing. There is actually a girl that makes me laugh all the time like no other girl does lol. Well she's part of family friends but she isn't into me, unfortunately. I do think that we would make a great couple sometimes but few years ago I was depressed and stressed so I guess I kind of scared her off. Guess I'll have to find someone exactly like her, perhaps...

dude, that was pretty sweet if she read that you'd probably be in there like swim wear, truthfully.

a reply to: peppycat

I actually have thought about dating a Christian woman a few times.

a reply to: anobody

have you tried doing a million pushups?

originally posted by: anobody

originally posted by: SlowNail
a reply to: anobody

Perhaps you're trying too hard. Be happy, crack a joke and don't be afraid to make a fool of yourself. A girl loves to laugh. In my experience, nothing will knock her off her feet quicker than a guy who's not afraid to look stupid to put a smile on her face.

I love laughing. There is actually a girl that makes me laugh all the time like no other girl does lol. Well she's part of family friends but she isn't into me, unfortunately. I do think that we would make a great couple sometimes but few years ago I was depressed and stressed so I guess I kind of scared her off. Guess I'll have to find someone exactly like her, perhaps...

False.

Learn how to get laid.

a reply to: anobody

Do remember that feeling you had when you first dived off the highest board at the pool, or first strapped yourself into the scary roller-coaster but you did it anyway because you felt "what's the worst that could happen" well, it's the same with chicks. All you gotta do is say "Hi" 'How are ya?" if you go to a bar you don't know, it makes it really easy to say "I don't come here often, or at all actually, whats the menu like?" and then if she's responsive, try "i'm gonna have a beer, can I get you a drink?" and then POW! You're in buddy.....just keep it flowing. You'll find after 5 minutes all those worries will melt away. Keep it cool, don't think about relationships or sex, just have a good time meeting someone.

a reply to: anobody

You sound like a good guy. I like you. I think you'll be okay.

You're not alone. I'm 28 and haven't been in a relationship since I was 20 or 21. It was a sex fueled rampage relationship in those days but since then, I've only had a few kisses at most. One of the main reasons is because I ended up distancing myself from the group I was hanging out with and also other life priorities came into play. (too many shenanigans were happening)

Anyways, these past 7 or so single years haven't been too bad actually. I would suggest working on casual conversation skills. As others have already said, make a plan to have just a simple, casual talk with some women. It doesn't have to be a lengthy conversation or anything like that. Just a minute or 2 at most would be fine. Maybe give it a go with some not-so-good-looking women at first. (it's just practice!). I found that vodka and whiskey tend to help my conversational skills at times, so maybe have a drink or 4 beforehand if you do drink.

Also, try and be the one who initiates the conversation. It's a great motivational booster after finishing the conversation and reflecting on it. Just break through this barrier a few times and you will have a much greater amount of confidence.

originally posted by: SlowNail
a reply to: anobody

You sound like a good guy. I like you. I think you'll be okay.

I got dumped a few times for being the good guy. Had one even tellme straight up "i cant be with you your too nice, im juat gonna end up cheating on you"

Left me heartbroken.. Like WTF???

You're too young to be freaking out about this stuff.
Consider purchasing this book called "The game" by Neil Strauss.
I've read it, and it's a very good book which covers a lot of different issues guys have with finding women, confidence, depression, how to talk to women, etc.. It's very funny too.
Reading this book WILL help you.
Here's an interview with the writer.
www.theatlantic.com...

a reply to: ElOmen

Sounds like you dodged a few bullets. Happy days.

originally posted by: SlowNail
a reply to: ElOmen

Sounds like you dodged a few bullets. Happy days.

To me it felt like all the bullets hit at my heart.
I fell hard for that one.

Hi.

Just ask the lady a question. Maybe about her, they love when you ask about them!
When you have asked about w/e they will normally tend to keep the conversation going.

Really mate, humans are not that hard to talk with, just seem interested in what people have to say and ask about them. We are self centered ego primates who LOVE TO TALK ABOUT OURSELVES, woah!

Also, just keep the question simple at first.
And ofcourse dont ask about creepy stuff, but I guess you are a smart man - so you should know.
Good luck!

(pssst, there is also a lot of ladies in the same situation as you mate)

a reply to: anobody

Women don't like sissies. You need to toughen up and stop feeling sorry for yourself. If you don't love yourself how is anyone else going to love you?

a reply to: ypperst

(pssst, there is also a lot of ladies in the same situation as you mate)

I gotta second this.

There's plenty of women out there that are feeling the same as you are. You don't know it, but they're thinking about striking up a conversation to. You're both standing there, not talking to anyone, but you're both thinking the same. If you break the ice first with something simple "Hey, how's it going?" or some similar opener, now they have a chance to follow up.

You would be surprised how many people out there burst into a lengthy conversation after you give the opener first. (sometimes they'll talk forever and talk about uninteresting stuff, so I just nod my head and say uh-huh over and over if I don't really give a hoot about what they're saying. This especially happens with women. Ask them a question and they go on and on, and I'm sitting there just like uh-huh, yup, oh that's great, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh, etc...... be prepared for these situations to.)

a reply to: anobody

I'm in my forties and have not kissed anyone for 11 years. It is the way of the world.

Affection is absolutely VITAL to our mental health and wellbeing. Lack of hugs and affection will definitely result in a negative psychological backlash.

It is NOT nature doing this to us. It is the state with all their clumsy social manipulation tactics.

Save up some money! Go hire a couple of ladies who will be good to you. I am a very moral person and I would not judge you. Extreme problems call for extreme measures. If it is affecting you very negatively psychologically then who would blame or judge?

I really miss affection very much. I have not taken my own advice yet, but am close. I feel like going to Amsterdam and totally over indulging I tell you. I made no vow to be all virtuous and virginal. # that. I love women and how they make me feel. It is just very sad that women are often these days more interested in the wallet and social status than they are in a man's personality and looks.

I am not saying all women are like that, but there is a definite huge shift to fat man and his wallet at the expense of even evolution. We are messing with nature in all the wrong ways and this will show in our future western health. Mean while, Islam, (that does not do this) is thriving. It is easy to see without looking too hard who the future belongs to in population terms and it will be the West's own fault, a result of our social breakdown and psychological ill health.

I'm going to wait a little longer for that trip to Amsterdam. However, I am only a man with a man's needs and desires and I will take that trip if it becomes psychologically necessary. This is no healthy way to live.

Good luck, buddy! I hope you get to experience some beautiful warmth and affection soon. Horror of horrors that a man should have to pay just to get some warmth! If that is the case then our sickness is near terminal. Believe it!

Maybe the problem is I take myself too seriously sometimes and in conversations with others I run out of topics in my head, don't know what to say, it's like I've thought of everything in my head already. Possible answers, possible consequences, you name it. Maybe I'm the best conversation killer, haha

originally posted by: anobody
Maybe the problem is I take myself too seriously sometimes and in conversations with others I run out of topics in my head, don't know what to say, it's like I've thought of everything in my head already. Possible answers, possible consequences, you name it. Maybe I'm the best conversation killer, haha

That is rubbish!

It is NOT your fault. It has NOTHING to do with you not being as good as anyone else.

If I was a woman, knowing what I know about men, it would be guys like you that are gentle and sincere with no huge ego who I would be more interested in. Just the fact that you are willing to examine your own behaviour and criticise yourself speaks volumes about your good character.

REPEAT! REPEAT! REPEAT! It is NOT you!

ps: Give me the humility and kindness of Clark Kent any day, lol.