I met my love of my life in a third world country... crap

page: 1
1

log in

join

posted on Nov, 7 2012 @ 05:19 AM
link   
A few months ago I've met the love of my life, really -- it's the real deal, and it's not at all like my previous relationship of being good friends with benefits for nearly 7-years. I can't express how exciting this and we do the typical lovey dovey things like sleep 3hrs a night most of the time, talk about our future in detail, talk as if we have hivemind etc.... The only problem is that we live in two different countries, and immigration takes about a year after engagement.....

Here's the scenario since I'm not an American Citizen.
1. I can go back to Canada and invite them there without an engagement visa (you can do this in Canada)
Reason: Likely to survive the next recession, beautiful and lush, plenty of space available. Homeland

2. We can get engaged and they could come to the US (although now might be the worst time to immigrate here)
Reason: Already have a good paying job here, and they could get a job here as well since I have a lot of connections around various tech companies (they have a CS degree).

3. I could go to their country but unfortunately it's overpopulated and extremely competitive (doesn't have a college degree but is skilled enough to be work at a corporate tech giant right now)
Reason: Their homeland, something new, and I'd be rich just moving there lol

4. We could move to a different country but we're not keen on that idea, and it's very difficult without being married
Reason: We both like to experience new things which also means eventually traveling and seeing new countries. YOLO kind of thing. Staying there is not a bad option but we're ready to settle.

We want to be together, there's no doubt about it but the question is, which option is the most logical? What's going to happen now with the US is so much more uncertain now, and we're thinking about our future children. What country is best to be raised in? It's a toughy! Thoughts?

Note: When I say "they" I mean as in the genderless pronoun. I mean to keep that person's gender anonymous.
edit on 7-11-2012 by Em2013 because: (no reason given)




posted on Nov, 7 2012 @ 05:26 AM
link   
Seams like your future plans are kinda quickly drawn up, especially for only knowing someone a few months.

Take it slow and just meet up first.

Moving in together or getting married is the worst thing you can do.



posted on Nov, 7 2012 @ 05:29 AM
link   
To answer with any real meaning we do need genders and locations. You seem to be missing the consideration of cultural norms, cultural expectations and well, anything cultural. To apply cultural considerations we need genders.

With the information you have posted you may as well flip a coin.

P



posted on Nov, 7 2012 @ 05:52 AM
link   
Personally I'd take the path of least resistance, the last thing you need to do in a new relationship is create additional and unnecessary issues.

My personal opinion is if get your foundations right the world will be at your feet to explore.

Not sure why you have issues with genders and locations.. but I a sure you know your own mind and reasons to withhold that info, although it might skew responses as people tend to think, well.. I am sure you know human nature by now.



posted on Nov, 7 2012 @ 06:22 AM
link   
It is hard. I have a similar story. Take it easy, get to know them, and when you have been around for some time, move in, then after some more time, get married.

My wife is form Mexico, We love each other very much. Real deal. Even with that things have been very hard at times. Culture shock comes even after 40 years of marriage. Be prepared to not have a relationship as you have imagined it up to now. Not worse or better, but definitely different.

In the end it takes a strong resolve to hang in there. Dirty looks, out right racism, being treated differently by friends, family. I don't know about you, but I have grown colder to the world after seeing the BS they put people through due to their hidden racism. People will talk all this BS about universal love and the modern world, but we are all animals really. There is inherent racism in the most seemingly benevolent person. WHY? because they never test themselves and find out how they tick. Not really. They take the easy road of "everything is love".....NO IT FREAKING ISNT. That is a lie.

People are people. There is no reason why they can't coexist. The things that make them coexist in peace have very little to do with universal love. It is about being real, being honest. That makes a marriage work. Not some made up fantasy of "loveness". That is only good for wedding nights and the odd in between week after too much sugar. The rest is life.

SO go for it, but know what you are getting into. If you think it is worth it, F them all. Do what you know is right.


edit on 7-11-2012 by manykapao because: (no reason given)



posted on Nov, 7 2012 @ 06:30 AM
link   
i'll throw my to bits in!
move to canada! final!!
the words you chose to use makes me think you may be a same sex couple (please correct me if i'm wrong!)
we are very tolerant,as a population,of that!

ya,the canadian gov't may make you bitch a lot,but our economy is still pretty good!

still a lot of good tech jobs here!

there still is an amazingly vast amount of room in this country!!! most people can't imagine!

our cities are worldly,and culturally diverse! anyone fits in here!

it is the safest place on the planet to live,no matter what kind of crap happens in the world!

yes we have crime,but in comparison to other countries,we do pretty good!
plus we're all so darn nice!!!

and yes its tru,most of us don't feel the need to lock our doors at night!!!

good luck with love and life my friend!



posted on Nov, 7 2012 @ 06:49 AM
link   


I could go to their country but unfortunately it's overpopulated and extremely competitive


You mean he lives in a third world hellhole and you have no interest in living in a slum.Admit it!



posted on Nov, 7 2012 @ 10:31 AM
link   
For raising children I vote Canada, outside the city environs. I would listen carefully to your sig other, what do they want? Canada is probably the least prejudiced country too, not counting the French/English thing, I could be wrong about that, but compared to the USA it seems less caught up in bs.



posted on Nov, 14 2012 @ 05:16 PM
link   
Thank you for your opinions! I really should take the time and come here more often, but your opinions are all very good! We haven't finalized our decision but I believe we're making the right decision. Once again, thank you!



posted on Nov, 14 2012 @ 07:38 PM
link   
Who are 'they'?

You should study up on psychological manipulation.

Why do you think most porn women are russian?





new topics

top topics



 
1

log in

join