Explain to me how Homosexuals are "born that way".

reply to post by Garfee


I'm a person that married in good faith and loved a man that hid being gay until my child was 8 mns old, and we owned a home and everything I believed in for my child and family was based on a lie. I only found out because I caught him, images that have haunted and tormented me more than I describe, his intention was to do what he wanted and let me believe a lie.

What he did was hateful...and VERY unfair

What is interesting to me about this thread is the question; Do we choose what we like?

And it brings up another question that historically, religiously and philosophically, has been given
short shrift.

Where do we come from? (I might start my own thread on this)

But anyway, it is possible, especially if you are spiritual, that who and what you are was established
before birth. That you simply were a spirit, or a life essence, that suddenly was "shoehorned" into
an animal body. That you bring with you your personality, likes, dislikes and predispositions.

Why couldn't you be born that way?... is a better question

Originally posted by MountainLaurel
reply to post by Garfee

 

I'm a person that married in good faith and loved a man that hid being gay until my child was 8 mns old, and we owned a home and everything I believed in for my child and family was based on a lie. I only found out because I caught him, images that have haunted and tormented me more than I describe, his intention was to do what he wanted and let me believe a lie.

since people think homosexuality is a choice, i would say maybe you turned him gay.

btw i am sorry that you were hurt by your situation. straight people hurt other straight people just as bad or worse everyday.

reply to post by MountainLaurel


Do you think life can ever be "normal" for me again? Can I ever erase this damage?

I`ll meet you half way , some are some aren't . Either way BPA , artificial hormones and the media plays a part . I have no issues with homosexuals .

Originally posted by lucid eyes
OP, there is nothing to explain. In every issue, liberals/leftists dont believe they are responsible for anything. No money? It must be those greedy rich people who stole from me. Addicted to Drugs? It must be pharmaceutical companies. Homosexual? It must be genetics. You wont heare a liberal say "I chose drugs" or "I chose poverty" or "I chose homosexuality".

edit on 29-4-2012 by lucid eyes because: (no reason given)

Nice political troll post buddy. Seems like the thread was going pretty well until that little gem. I especially like how you group homosexuality with things like drug addiction and poverty. Very telling.


Anyway, I believe that it is not a choice. Some people grow up having feelings and attractions that confuse them until they realize what homosexuality is. Others have traumatic experiences early in life that cause that to happen. Maybe its genetics, environment, or both.

reply to post by MountainLaurel


You need to calm down and get over it.
What happened has happened. Look after your child and move on.
If possible, get your ex-husband to help support the child so you don't have to do everything alone.
If he won't do that, then give the child the best life it can surrounded by your friends and family.

It takes a village to raise a child!

Let it hear every view possible on every possible thing!

regarding separated identical twins, its interesting to note that identical twin studies have show that homosexuality isn't purely genetic, but more pre-natal developmental with a strong genetic or familiar predisposition:

abouthomosexuality.com...

-52% of identical (monozygotic) twins of homosexual men were likewise
homosexual

-22% of fraternal (dizygotic) twins were likewise homosexual

and the end of the day, it still boils down to repressed homosexuals being the ones who are most homophobic in society (with similarly conceived religious quotes under their armpit and all) and therefore most obsessed with 'acting' straight and denying being 'born' that way like effeminate or open gays

thus in their mind, homophobic/repressed gays have the 'choice' to not ever be 'gay', or to be an 'ex-gay'

reply to post by elitegamer23


If she turned him gay, he was already gay, or at least attracted to men more before hand.

It's not like you can turn some one in to a different gender, or different skin colour.

Not without surgery anyway.

Originally posted by MountainLaurel
reply to post by Garfee

 

I'm a person that married in good faith and loved a man that hid being gay until my child was 8 mns old, and we owned a home and everything I believed in for my child and family was based on a lie. I only found out because I caught him, images that have haunted and tormented me more than I describe, his intention was to do what he wanted and let me believe a lie.

My family and I knew a man who did the same, who has since passed away. I can't imagine how difficult it must have been as he had a wife as two adult boys when he admitted the truth.

I'm sorry that this was your experience but you absolutely can't use it as an excuse to base everything you believe about homosexuality.

If you were treated badly by this man, it was by him and not all homosexuals and not all men. Each of us are vastly different people. Some people are selfish, some aren't. I hope that I don't ever love someone like your ex-husband and experience what you did.

I know you feel betrayed but be angry with him, not me .

reply to post by elitegamer23


Nice underhanded dig, bravo, and yeah...that's how your left feeling....did I make him gay? I'm sweet, kind. easy on the eyes, good mommy...and would have been a great wife to a man that liked women and wasn't a selfish liar.

Originally posted by MountainLaurel
Honestly I'm absolutely stunned at at what I'm reading in this thread? I try to always give people the "benefit" of the doubt, and have given much consideration and empathy as to WHY gay people ruin other peoples lives with thier LIES and deception....but not one gay man in this thread has even acknowledged this point, the wreakage they leave behind when they "come out" and the implications to the children and spouses they leave in thier wake.

Sooo sorry you were confused and "persecuted" , and have zero empathy for the "collateral" damage it has caused. Glad you have it all figured out now....

I guess many people who are gay lie about it because of the way people will treat them if they come out.

Originally posted by voidla
reply to post by elitegamer23

 

If she turned him gay, he was already gay, or at least attracted to men more before hand.

It's not like you can turn some one in to a different gender, or different skin colour.

Not without surgery anyway.

i was being sarcastic. some religious people think homosexuallity is a choice, so in their minds a woman could surely make a guy choose to be gay.

Originally posted by MountainLaurel
reply to post by elitegamer23

 

Nice underhanded dig, bravo, and yeah...that's how your left feeling....did I make him gay? I'm sweet, kind. easy on the eyes, good mommy...and would have been a great wife to a man that liked women and wasn't a selfish liar.

sorry for the dig, the idea of this thread just annoys me.
i totally believe you are a great person and great mom. you just have to realize a straight man could have hurt you just as bad. people are assholes like that, doesnt matter if they are gay or straight.

just dont make your child hate his father. that would be failing as a parent.
so youre easy on the eyes? i need pictures if that is the case. im just being stupid, ignore me.

reply to post by MountainLaurel


Oh Gosh, has been a while since I cried so hard over this , and yes overall have moved on....and know I have to make peace with this. It just was so awful and heartbreaking....TY for listening....

Let me point out that I am no expert and this is only my opinion that I have come to through reading numerous articles from a few different disciplines. I think homosexuality may be a combination of genetics and personal choice.

If we look at genetics, it appears that we are predisposed to certain conditions. We may be more prone to certain diseases or conditions, certain physical features, and possibly behaviors (like addiction, anger, or adrenaline junkies).

Now if you combine genetics with outside factors (family, friends, and local social behaviors) then you have a fairly powerful influence on your behavior. Lets say that your family tree has a history of heart disease and you grow up in a family that has bacon at every meal (mmmm.... bacon), you know those people, instead of hamburger buns they wrap their burgers with bacon. So now you are basically a walking slow motion suicide case.

Since we dont fully understand genetics, cellular memory, or social interaction theories yet then we can't really say homosexuality is genetic or a choice. The way I see it is that we have politicians and special interest groups yelling at each other to force their opinion on the general public (ha more people think like i do so i must be right nanny nanny booboo).

Now for those that say "homosexuality is not natural!" GTFO! RIGHT NOW! Watch a documentary, go volunteer at a zoo, or just quit spouting nonsense that you obviously don't understand. Guess what, every animal that I have ever studied the mating habits of (I know its strange I've studied a lot of them and no i dont work with animals and no im not a effing furry!!!) EVERY. SINGLE. mammalian species that I have studied exhibits homosexual interactions. A personal note, my red doberman liked being bottom with his best mutt friend.

Theyre not born that way. In no way os homosexuality inheritated. Its learned. And yes it really is wrong

Originally posted by voidla
reply to post by elitegamer23

 

If she turned him gay, he was already gay, or at least attracted to men more before hand.

It's not like you can turn some one in to a different gender, or different skin colour.

Not without surgery anyway.

I thought the previous post you're replying too was pretty insensitive and dead wrong.

No woman could ever make me gay, period. I find even the thought of a homosexual act to be
a complete turn-off. Probably in the same way that homosexuals find heterosexual acts gross
to them.

I also understand that I didn't choose my sexual preferences. I simply did not choose to find
the curve of a woman's body sexually attractive. IT JUST IS. Or my predisposition for women with
beautiful lips, high heels, or lingerie...I didn't sit down and think these things thru...nor would
I want to.

I could no more choose to be gay than I could choose to a particular race. I will never be at a bar,
alone, late at night, near last call, and suddenly decide to "UP" my chances of getting laid by
making the decision to be bisexual....Ain't gonna happen. I didn't choose, and you Mr. OP
didn't choose. If you happen to be heterosexual, be happy for it...I guarantee it is a much
easier lifestyle than homosexuality is....especially for men.

Originally posted by MountainLaurel
his intention was to do what he wanted and let me believe a lie.

i believe

1) there are historically, traditionally many gay men who felt cornered or forced into the heterosexual life of having a wife and kids.

2) however, like i've mentioned earlier those that i know in such relationships currently, in this day and age where its relatively ok to be openly gay in society as well as to most families, boast about how straight-acting they are and how they get away with both pleasing their family/society while 'living their private life' as they please - which includes infidelity upon their wives with other men. i have outed a few but it always backfires because some spouses are so blind to it or they just don't want to lose what they have even if their hubby is cheating on them with men.

i wondered why your husband lied about being straight when he was gay, and never came clean over all the years, just 'lived a lie'. was he always gay? was he likely born gay??

what if he never had gotten caught? he would have lived a lie as a straight married man with kids when he was a gay? did he cheat on you, i mean was he more like #1 or #2??