The big thread about being gay.

Originally posted by Helious
Involving a child though changes that dynamic and I don't agree with it.

I get so sick of adults using children as reasons for their own hang ups.

THE CHILDREN DO NOT CARE.

Children are very accepting. Let them accept.

reply to post by ErtaiNaGia


Maybe because non-married people aren't what's being discussed here?
Second.

Originally posted by xxblackoctoberxx
the problem is our society is full of a bunch of mini-hitlers fueled by religious dogma and reassured by the fact that there are other mini-hitlers out there that agree with them.

they think that for some reason they have a right to interfere with other peoples lives by trying to tell them what they can and cant do when, even in their own religious text, it says "Judge not, that ye be not judged"

its just something for them to do because they have no life of their own

I most certainly am not a "mini hitler" and I am not fueled by religious anything. Further more, I could care less if anyone else on Earth agrees with me. I would politely point out I am not judging anyone, a persons sexual preference is there own choice, as is the choice to be with another of the same sex if that makes them happy, I have no problems with these things.

What I have a problem with, are those people thinking that they are entitled to the same benefits they would have if they were in a heterosexual relationship. Nature does not allow for this, so you ask the state to give you children because you think that it doesn't matter to the child? How do you know it doesn't or won't matter? I think it is not only selfish but shows a total disregard for the mental and social well being of children.

Love, happiness, right to choose are all things I think gay people should have without any type of prejudice or ire. My "tolerance" ends at petitioning the state for children, that is where my common sense leads me to write these kinds of threads.

reply to post by Believer101

Maybe because non-married people aren't what's being discussed here?

What is being discussed here is the perception that there is not "Equal Rights" between heterosexuals and homosexuals.

The "Gay Rights" crowd talks about the "Rights" that Married people have, that they want also.

However, they seem quite lax in perceiving the apparent Inequality of Married people (Heterosexual or otherwise) having "Rights" that Non-Married people do not have access to.

It strikes me as not only hypocritical, but fundamentally ignorant of the truth of the subject matter.

If we are truly going to have a discussion on Equal "Rights", why would one assume that Married people deserve more "Rights" than Non-Married people?

That doesn't seem like a desire for "Equal Rights" to me.

Originally posted by Annee

Originally posted by Helious
Involving a child though changes that dynamic and I don't agree with it.

I get so sick of adults using children as reasons for their own hang ups.

THE CHILDREN DO NOT CARE.

Children are very accepting. Let them accept.

I get so sick of adults using children they can not conceive to fill holes in there own selfish lives.

YOU HAVE NO IDEA IF THEY CARE.

Children are accepting because they are naive and too young to know any better, there not dogs..... Dogs are accepting because they don't know any better. Children turn into adolescents who turn into adult humans. They are not always so accepting or naive then and who knows what damage has been caused by then.

reply to post by ErtaiNaGia


It took me three times to read it but I think your post is genius, well said and thank you for the contribution!

I am going to post now in the attempt to rectify what some of you have thought is hate speech or an attempt to generalize or propagate some sort of agenda against the gay community. Perhaps my choice of words in some posts or my perceived disposition to the gay community were misinterpreted or perhaps my alcohol consumption betrayed me...... Who knows, either way, I want to be clear so I will offer a snippet of my own life for review and ridicule because since we are talking about feelings as it pertains to the emotions of many members I would be cheating you of the truth if you didn't know my own background.

I grew up with a mother that had 3 kids from 3 different fathers, we constantly moved around, had no idea of who our fathers were and were subjected to abusive men who treated our mother badly most of the time because of the simple fact she was a drifter and often had no choice.

My mothers first priority was always to her boyfriend, never to her children and growing up in that fashion has had a very specific effect on me personally. I met my father for the first time when I was 14, he sold drugs and soon after had me doing the same, he was abusive and he and his wife (my step mother) were both on drugs 6 days out of the week. I left that house with nothing but the clothes I had on when I turned 17 and I have never looked back. I fight the feeling to ever feel sorry for myself because I believe the person I am today would have only been possible under those circumstances.

That said, my child hood, all the way was really, really F'd up. I don't experience emotions like normal people do and I am probably more like a Vulcan than a normal human being. I don't have any mental issues at all, it is more like I live life through black and white, common sense and my brain in general. I have never had the luxury of making discussions or speech through my heart because I completely honestly don't feel much. This is probably why I have ex wives instead of a wife.

I want to say that while I stand by my speech, I honestly would like to say I am sorry to anyone that I have offended in this thread and tell you that my position is not to judge, make light of or stereotype anyone else in this world. We are all human, we all have the same feelings and we all bleed the same blood. Regardless of any differences, I would at the end of the day, without question, risk my own life to save yours if the opportunity ever presented itself, at that moment, it would not matter if you were black, red, gay or shaped like a pear. I just would.

reply to post by Helious


You're right, i guess i do care.

This topic just gets my blood going.

I'm just tired of people dividing and separating each other.

So i'm sorry, but there is no reason you should treat or think of me any differently than anyone else you come upon. I should have all the rights you have. It's a pretty simple way of thinking..everyone is equal, and it's just BS to think otherwise.

Originally posted by dannotz
reply to post by Helious

 

You're right, i guess i do care.

This topic just gets my blood going.

I'm just tired of people dividing and separating each other.

So i'm sorry, but there is no reason you should treat or think of me any differently than anyone else you come upon. I should have all the rights you have. It's a pretty simple way of thinking..everyone is equal, and it's just BS to think otherwise.

It is a passionate topic! You have no need to be sorry, people speak to the level of there passion and sometimes emotions win over . Like I said, there is a debate to be had but I feel like the thread has spun out of control and is now in the hands of people "for vs against" and more about us vs them. That was not my aim for this and as such, I am going to bow out.

Perhaps there is just too much else going on in the world right now........ We will have the conversation later. Know one thing though. I don't care that your gay, I would happily be open to knowing you and even be friends with you, no strings attached!

reply to post by Helious

It took me three times to read it but I think your post is genius, well said and thank you for the contribution!

Well... thank you very much!

Glad I could be of assistance!

Originally posted by Helious
Children are accepting because they are naive and too young to know any better,

I thought knowing homosexuality is wrong is innate. Did I misunderstand a point?

Originally posted by Helious there not dogs..... Dogs are accepting because they don't know any better.

"They're not dogs." You're right, they are not mutated wolves. They are mutated lemurs. You try to make a distinction, and then you say the same about both. Are you saying that children can eventually be trained to bite gay people?

Originally posted by HeliousChildren turn into adolescents who turn into adult humans.They are not always so accepting or naive then and who knows what damage has been caused by then.

I'm pretty sure I know the damage caused to them by the self-righteous.

Originally posted by Helious

I get so sick of adults using children they can not conceive to fill holes in there own selfish lives.

There is not one unselfish reason for having children - period!

YOU HAVE NO IDEA IF THEY CARE.

Oh yeah I do. Children say Ewwwwwwwwwwwwww! to their hetero parents having sex.

Then parents explain biology - - including chemical attraction - - so children can learn the difference between LUST and real LOVE. LUST is the biological chemical attraction every body produces. The body - chemicals in the body determine who you are attracted to. Some bodies are made to be attracted to same gender. LOVE is a sharing and commitment to each other. LOVE is a choice. Biological attraction is not.

Children are accepting because they are naive and too young to know any better, . . .

Know any better? Know any better then what? Your own fears and phobias?

reply to post by Annee


The best I can tell you is to take a few minutes and go back through when you have some extra time and re read and contemplate your last post. Everything that you said is not only wrong but I honestly don't even feel compelled to argue it because I really just feel it's plain silly.

Originally posted by DJDigitalGem

Originally posted by nusnus
I don't have any problems with gay people, but sexual practices like anal sex, fisting etc that take place between same sex people, is disgusting, and an outright abuse of the human body.

The same goes for people who have sex with animals and inanimate objects.

Its not healthy or safe. Why try to make it sound like it is is beyond me.

I have NEVER "fisted" any GF of mine, nor would I ever have any desire to. I think you've been watching too many bad porn's made by dirty old men. Why do you care what we (gays and lesbians) do in our bedrooms anyway?? We don't care what you're doing in your bedroom so why do you care so much about what we are doing?

Stop pretending for a minute. I don't care what you do until it starts causing health problems and increases the risks of HIV and what not. Thats one aspect, another aspect is, its a lifestyle that inherently takes on 'sex the abnormal way'. Women don't have penis'es yes? And men don't have vagina's. They're bound to engage in abnormal sex due to the nature of their bodies. I have a problem supporting a movement that doesn't bother discussing the open risks of anal sex for example. Lesbians are a tad bit more safe at this point.

Most people such as yourself have been saying one thing and one thing only: why is it any of your concern? it is because this could happen to my child, this could happen to a relative of mine. You want me to sit here and just say: oh its your decision do whatever you want. and just be nonchalant about it?

THATS what I have a problem with. And its not a big problem, its a serious problem that you might ignore, and will ignore because: love knows no bounds. Well sh*t, love should know some bounds. And you all should say something. But you wont...you just don't give a damn do you?

Originally posted by -W1LL
reply to post by nusnus

 

sure there are risks, there are risks to any type of sex that's why there is sex education. safe sex should be practiced by everyone.

edit on 12/2/2011 by -W1LL because: (no reason given)

What have I been saying??

There is this huge issue of HIV awareness, then there is this huge issue of gay/lesbian rights. But there is a connection between the two. You want to discuss it? If my kid was gay or lesbian or whatever, the first thing I would do would be to educate them on the wrongs of anal sex. I wouldn't go around saying something like: its your decision hon. Thats just nuts. Its not your decision to mess around with your body in ways that are unhealthy. And I just don't see enough people speaking up against it. So my support for gay lesbian groups is at minimal at best. Theyre human beings, they have the right to do whatever they want to be happy, except they cant ask me to approve of bizarre risky sexual behaviour. They need to speak up against it.

Mod note: Again, let's not use this thread as a "gossip column" aimed at other members. The topic is plenty controversial on its own. -- Majic

I know this is venturing in off-topic territory, but I need to address some ignorance...

Originally posted by nusnus
Stop pretending for a minute.
...
They're bound to engage in abnormal sex due to the nature of their bodies. I have a problem supporting a movement that doesn't bother discussing the open risks of anal sex for example. Lesbians are a tad bit more safe at this point.
...
If my kid was gay or lesbian or whatever, the first thing I would do would be to educate them on the wrongs of anal sex. I wouldn't go around saying something like: its your decision hon. Thats just nuts. Its not your decision to mess around with your body in ways that are unhealthy. And I just don't see enough people speaking up against it. So my support for gay lesbian groups is at minimal at best. Theyre human beings, they have the right to do whatever they want to be happy, except they cant ask me to approve of bizarre risky sexual behaviour. They need to speak up against it.

You'll need to speak to your kids about the "wrongs of anal sex" in any case. Seeing that somewhere between 20% and 40% of heterosexual people have engaged in anal sex somewhere in their lives. While the statistics can hardly be called "accurate" because of the nature of the studies, it cannot be denied that heterosexuals engage in anal sex as well...

Statistics

Why don't you speak up against this "bizarre sexual behavior" practiced by heterosexuals? And should we start naming all the other "bizarre sexual behavior" heterosexuals engage in as well? I'm not going to drag the thread any further into the gutter, by naming them, but you know about them... Heterosexuals are using their bodies in ways that are unhealthy... You should really start speaking up against it...

What's that? It's different? Because "homo" isn't somewhere in that sentence?

You say "they cant ask me to approve of bizarre risky sexual behavior"... Have someone - anyone - ever come up to you and ask you for approval for what they do in the privacy of their bedroom?! Not? Then why are the things that people do in their bedrooms an issue for you? Can we perhaps shift the attention and discuss (and give approval) for what you do in your bedroom?

It may be a complete surprise to you, but not all gay men practice anal sex. Personally I would be surprised if it was more than half... Again, there are no accurate data on this...

Perhaps you should investigate your obsession with "anal sex"...? You sure like discussing the topic.

The bottom line is: There are a lot, and a mean A LOT more to homosexual relationships - both male and female - than just sex. Do yourself a favor and make friends with an average homosexual person... Yes, I expect you'll tell us that your mom's best friend's sister's uncle knows someone that worked at the store down the street that may be gay. That won't do. Befriend a homosexual person. Get to know them like a brother or sister. Then come back to this thread. That would be a fair and honest discussion. And a lot less misguided.

reply to post by Gemwolf


I already have gay friends I know very well. My best friend happens to be one.

But if there were research into the number of gay men who practice anal sex, the numbers would probably be very high. Again this is a social understanding. There is nothing to prove otherwise to me.

You don't see me bringing in heterosexuals here because that's not the point of the subject. I am against all forms of abusive sexual practices due to the high nature of risks and diseases involved. I'm against having multiple sexual partners for example. But again, this is about the gay community. Its about how society views gay men especially. And since gay men do not come out and speak up against unhealthy sexual practices, they simply leave the ground open for controversy. And when people who support gay/lesbian rights come out and say things like: its none of your business what happens in our bedroom! it frustrates me a little. Yes its none of my business, but I worry about the health of people, and I worry that ignoring these things just because they are private makes us less human and more prone to accepting them as norm.

Originally posted by Helious
reply to post by Annee

 

The best I can tell you is to take a few minutes and go back through when you have some extra time and re read and contemplate your last post. Everything that you said is not only wrong but I honestly don't even feel compelled to argue it because I really just feel it's plain silly.

Sorry - - I've been interested in gays since I was the token straight female at a company that hired mostly gays/lesbians and gay/lesbian couples. I wanted to understand them - - since at that time I was naive. I was there for 5+ years. Ohhhhh! - - the coffee room discussions were very enlightening. I became very close to most of them.

It has been a 20 year study.

I'm also a 65 year old gramma who raised 2 daughters - - helped raise a now 18 year old grandson - - and am now raising a 4 year old grandson and an 11 year old granddaughter. We also had a gay roommate for 2+ years.

What I said was NOT wrong.

YOU need to wake up and join the real world.

reply to post by Annee

Thanks for one of the best posts in this thread. 2nd to only the super mod's post above.
I too have worked in a workplace with about 80% Gay folk in and wow it is an eye opener, it was about 10 years back and still see them often.
Some of the older guys told me about the real Hatred they have suffered in their live's due to homophobia and to see that they had the spirit and courage to say "Iam what Iam" inspire's me to this day.
Sometimes I wish I could give out real gold stars