What constitutes a 'real woman'? I think it's fair to say that the standards are rather lucid depending on the times.
As for me, I find it difficult at times to hold on to the core part of myself in this crazy world that would have me believe that no matter what I
look like, how much I weigh, how big or small my boobs are, how straight my teeth are, or what color or length my hair is, I will never ever measure
up. And why will I never measure up? Because there are billions of dollars to be made off of women who think they need to be perfect, perfect as in
look like the celebrities who by the way can't even live up to their own photoshopped versions of themselves.
It is on the surface though,
difficult to assign where these feelings of self loathing come from when you are in the moment surrounded by supposed perfection. When everyone around
is scrambling to look like a better carbon copy of their neighbor.
Lets see, I shave my legs, armpits, and whatever else I can reach, I enjoy looking pretty and applying makeup (part of the artist in me) but I have no
problem going without either. I enjoy dressing sexy on a night out, and turning the occasional head (I know I will one day be old and wrinkly so I
can't deny that I enjoy small attentions when they're passed my way) I sometimes obsess over my weight although I do try to catch myself and refrain.
I LOVE sex and am not afraid or insecure about anything to do with sex.
Do I fall into the traps of low self esteem and insecurities? Yes of course. I'd have to walk around with my eyes shut (especially because I live in
Vegas currently) to not fall under some sort of influence of feeling not sexy enough, or not thin enough, or not whatever enough...
However, I do try to always hold on to the things that are most important to me, as a woman.
Creativity (this is a HUGE one for me, I feel most at one with myself when I am creating, when I am overcoming the insecurities and ego enough to not
care what anybody thinks or says about whatever it is I am creating, it is a personal thing for me, whether it be singing, writing, working with my
There are more, but I do try to be the best mother and wife I can. I do not work right now, I have a ten month old beautiful baby boy who I absolutely
adore. A husband who I love dearly. Has the road been easy so far? No definitely not. But I resolve to face the challenges head on, learning more
about myself than I could have ever hoped.
I think I find it most difficult to be myself, always. To not cave under the pressure of others. To not hide my true nature. It is easy when you are
in are in a relationship, especially for one who likes to please, to not sometimes try to be somebody else just to make the other person happy. I have
found that if you stick to who you really are even if you doubt yourself, respect and love come easier from the other person.
Well I didn't mean to write a novel, just share some insights from my experience and my heart.
And whoever said that a lady isn't classy if she curses...I don't think you'd like me very much. Although, I do try not to do it excessively.
edit on 20-8-2011 by seeker11 because: (no reason given)