GypsK rants

I'm hating a lot of things lately. Things... and situations, not people, at least that's a good thing.
I hate it when people tell me I should feel blessed with what I have, but I can't feel that way if it doesn't feel right, nothing feels right anymore and I hate it when they don't understand that.

But what I hate most of all right now are hormones! That's right: hormones! The ugly little things that have us like puppets on strings, triggering emotional outbursts and steer our desisions. They make me hate everything and create the illusion that nothing feels right!

For the last one and a half year I've been supressing my hormonal cycle with medication (for health reasons). Since last week I stopped all the meds and are slowly regaining my natural cycle again (for other health reasons).
It's a mess.
I realized that while supressing the cycle I was more balanced then ever, never had one emotional overload and could think rational when dealing with problems... and life.
But now, it's like the hormones are the puppet master and I'm the biggest puppet on planet Earth!

so I'm wondering, when are we "ourselfs"? I feel more like myself without hormones... so does that mean that every woman out there is not herself? ever??
hm.... maybe I should have been born a male instead of a female, now that would explain it

let's see what else I hated today:
the constant rain and cold
the mess that was waiting in my house when I got home from work
my employee calling in sick during sales
the mail I should've gotten two days ago and didnt get yet!!!
having wet and cold feet all day from stepping in a puddle this morning
skipping lunch because of to little time
the feeling of hating everything

yea, I'm grumpy... can't help it, and it's not even that time of the month yet
pitty the husband! (he doesn't seem to remember how to avoid me) poor guy...

and oh, I also hate spell checks!! puh.

reply to post by GypsK


Well did that feel good? Sometimes just getting it off of our chest helps.
Sending you a cyber hug and some cheer yo...


Peace,
spec

reply to post by speculativeoptimist


aw that's a supper cute kitty!

yeah ranting does feel good, thank godess for this section of the site
but I just know I'll have another one of those days tomorrow. It's as if every nerve in my body is having an itch and ready to jump out... that's not like me.

reply to post by GypsK

My ex gf suffered from fibrosis myalgia and used to get super stressed by her family and the only thing that offered some relief was a long hot bath with all the goodies in it, a professional massage and then a little meditation.
I don't know what to say about the hormone madness, other than whatever changes are made will probably take a week or two to adjust. Oh yea, she used to sit and watch utube vids of funny things and stand up comedy to lift her spirits. Best wishes to you....

spec

thanks for the tip

Have you tried some primal screaming? That has always worked for me, just stand in the middle of a crowded road draw as much breath into your lungs as you can and put all of your hatred into one huge scream as loud as you can It's fun and free!

Either that or pick a fight with someone much smaller then you like this guy

Sadly sounds like you gave up your health for health reasons.

Maybe you can grab some over the counter mood stabilizers or some whiskey and coke.
Once your body finds it's equilibrium you should feel a bit better.

be well

reply to post by davespanners


nice vid, cute kitty

I did pick a battle with a guy at the nokia customer care help desk, he kept refering me to a website that didnt want to load arch!!!
or, a boxing match on the WII feels good as well

thanks for the clip

reply to post by shadow watcher


I'm not giving up my health, but am trying to gain better health by going back to how it used to be.

strange thing that you tell me to get mood stabalizers because when going back to how 'natural' should be, we shouldn't need meds to controll ourselfs in the first place.
Which brings me back to my original post and the question, do we all live by hormone controlled strings?

btw, I don't do meds or drugs or booze, seen the downside of them one time to often in my life

continued rant:
it's almost 9 am, jus one quick shower and then I'm ready to get into the most bussy saturday of the year: First sales saturday, it's gonna be a battle.
I'm already disliking the customers I haven't met yet...blah
"think happy thoughts... think happy thoughts... greet the sun (that's not out there and flooded by all the rain)"

lol, let's get ready to rumble, wish me luck

and btw, thanks for all the replies

I was thinking for the short term until your body adjusts, but yeah I see the irony of taking something to feel natural.
When I decided to go off my meds, it was cold turkey and it sucked so bad. It gets better over time, but man does it suck until then.

I guess plunging into exercise would speed things along. A kind of detox aide so to speak.
hope you get there soon

reply to post by shadow watcher


thanks
Things been a bit better since yesterday, although I kept expecting the worst, lol

did you also keep forgetting important things? I feel like I do, then I suddenly remember much to late that I had something that needed to be done asap and rush to it with bouncing heart (hate-it )

But yeah, I called my doc and she says it can take as long as 3 months for my body to become balanced again so I guess I'll just have to keep my head up and try not to become irritated to much

the cell phone conspiracy rant

Since the beginning of this week, a whole lot of people came back to the store with their newly purchased Nokia cell phones. They all had the same issues: not being able to use some basic functions of the phone, like sms and mms.
After a couple of angry clients I called Nokia and a few providers. It seems that since this year, when you buy a phone, you need to register it online in order to receive the basic configurations. (speaking of Belgium, not sure how it is in other countries)
But anyway, this means that you need to register with your legal ID information, they link your sim-nr to your phones imei-nr... or it simply won't work properly! it's insane!
So far it seems only Nokia and two providers I know of, but soon it will be all of them.

When I asked them "why???" they tell me random things like, security, protection... one help desk person metioned the word 'terrorism'... but in a nutshell, no one seems to know exactly why some operators started doing this.

Well, we know why! right?

sad thing, I have to deal with the angry customers because some of them don't want to believe it and keep claiming that their phone is broken, don'thave internet access or are to old or to dumb to understand what a cell phone configuration is. Second, while doing (trying to do) the registration for them, most of the time the web pages won't load or give errors. The answer from the help desk person: "it works fine for me"....aaaarch!!

Personally I haven't registered my phone online yet, don't think I'm gonna either.

reply to post by GypsK


Hey gypsy

How did it work before this ?
I mean to have a cell you have to have a contract (if your not using pay as you go) and so I would assume that they would have those details anyway! Or is the difference that you know have to give the details to Nokia as well as your service provider?
It seems a bit redundant and a waste of everyone's time (especially yours) if that's the case

reply to post by davespanners


before people could choose to have a contract with a provider or buy pre payed cards, most have the pre payed cards because the contracts are still expensive, especially if you just want to use the basic options of your phone.
If you had a contract it was only linked to the sim card, not to the phone.

Now, you need to register no matter what system you use... and you need to re-register every time you change cell phones. Everyone has your up to date information: the providers, the phone manufacturers and everyone else who has access to their databases.

yes, lots of extra work for us

Guess it's like registering a car.... you have the car (cell phone), linked to a licence plate (sim card), linked to your personal information (like registereing a drivers license)

I'm still shaking as I write this...
an hour ago, one of my employees came threatening me at my house. He wanted an advance on his payment because he was out of cash.
He didn't ask nicely and when I told him that first of all I couldn't do that 'just like that' and secondly: I don't keep money in the house, he started yelling and threatening louder and louder: "I have no money, I have nothing to eat anymore, etc etc..." (I don't know what he does with his money or if he is in debt... and frankly that's not my problem either, we pay him every month and in time)
To my shame, all my neigbours came outside to see what was going on, I'm not sure what they thought of it, I just hope they don't think I'm a bad employer that doesn't pay up or something... afterwards I kept thinking, maybe it was my luck that people came looking. After a while he left.
He's working this afternoon and my husband said he will deal with it.

Now this employee, we had to let him go because he didn't do his job as he should, was always late at work, always calling in sick or going home sick... or just not showing up at all. He worked for us a bit more then a year.
So we let him go with 3 months notice, he is supposed to work till his contract ends in March.
Ever since we had the conversation with him that it isn't working out, things are getting worse, his behaviour is getting worse. And now this.
We told him that we would let him go with a "good' reason, so he can get unemployment payments should he not find another job (if we told the true reason he wouldn't receive those)

As an employer I have two legal options: let him work for another 3 months with payment, or fire him imediately and pay him an equivalent of 3 months. He demands that we let him go immediately and pay.
Now 3 months pay is a lot of money, letting him go right away will cost us more then double of what he earns.
I'm not a multinational, just a small store owner and I have to watch what I do with the store's money, it are difficult times.
I've been calling around for the last hour and we simply don't have a third option. If I call in what happened today, he will not be able to get unemployment payments in 3 months.

Right now I don't even care what happens to him, he threathened me at my home and his behaviour at work is not good at all. Personally I rather pay him and not have to work with him ever again, but if I do that I'll be putting my store in debt. Just small debt, but debt. My husband doesn't want to do that, he says he's not paying anyone to sit at home, especially not someone who made it obvious he wants to abuse the situation.


aarch.. rant rant..why does this stuff keep happening to me?????

Yes, I rant sometimes, but only in the written version, like in this thread. Never out loud to strangers, doctors, family... even my husband doesnt get to hear most of my rants.
So what is it that makes doctors think I need to go on anti depressants? I'm not depressed!!! I rant, but I''m not depressed! When I rant it has to do with stress releave, getting it out of my system... that has nothing to do with depression!

Today I had to go to the doctor because I have an acute bladder infection, my own doc didn't have an opening today so she told me to find another doc that could prescribe me antibiotics asap. I went to the same doctor where the rest of my family goes to.. he is supposed to be good.
He starts asking questions, does some tests, comfirms an infection...about 5 min later we are talking about my medical hystory (not about bladder infection) and he desides that it would be a good thing to start taking anti depressants... 'just to relax me' he said... All I told him was that I've been loosing weight and eating like crazy and that it are very bussy times at work so I'm constantly doing 'something'. I moved, then I moved my store... rebuild the old store and moved into the new store... that all in about 5 months time... so yeah, I lost weight, is that a surprise?
But my question was how to gain the weight back... not, 'doc, am I depressed?'

So what's up with that? They see a 1m60m tall, 43 kg woman who looks about 25 instead of the 34 that she is, and everyone automatically desides that I can't mentaly put up with the lifestyle and the job that I have??
Now that angers me! When they come into my store and ask me to load their new tv or dryer into the back of their car they aren't worried at all if I can handle it or not !!!

I'm not depressed. If the moment ever comes that I can't cope anymore then I'll find an easier job and lead an easier lifestyle all on my own desision.... but untill that moment comes, I'm not taking anti depressants!

Of course, that doc knows my entire family and he knows about my brothers suicide, my fathers death last year and his alcohol problem, my mothers addiction to tranquilation pills..... maybe he assumes that I must be just like them...
One more reason why I don't want the pills, If I'm like them and addiction is somehow in our genes, that's one more reason for me to stay away from pills... also one of the reasons why I don't drink alcohol... I drink herbal tea instead and it does me so much more good.

tss tss tss... one more doc that never sees me again