The Feminist Movement—Ruining The Image Of Men

I think the Feminist Movement destroyed "gentlemen." No longer are they allowed, encouraged, or taught how to treat and respect women.

I'm old fashioned, I still enjoy men opening a door for me, and the polite conversation that follows. "Thank you and... You're welcome."

Originally posted by sodakota
I think the Feminist Movement destroyed "gentlemen." No longer are they allowed, encouraged, or taught how to treat and respect women.

I'm old fashioned, I still enjoy men opening a door for me, and the polite conversation that follows. "Thank you and... You're welcome."

My 16 year old grandson was raised with old fashion manners - - because my family believes in good manners.

Being Rude or being a Bully - - - is being Rude or being a Bully.

If someone expresses good manners and is treated Rudely in return - - then that person is being Rude. It is not a gender issue.

In the beginning of fighting for change and legal rights - it often creates extreme or militant condtions. No matter what the fight is for.

I seriously doubt there are many hard core femnist today - - that will be rude to someone opening the door for them.

Can we get out of the past?

reply to post by Annee

yahoo used to have message boards, and I used to spend time on them.
there was a religious section that I went into alot.....
you would be surprised just how many women would notice the time and post something like....
oh, I didn't realize how late it was, and my husband will be home soon...He doesn't want me posting on this board!!! I'd better get off now....

all the while these women were trying to con other women into believing that God wanted them to be submissive and obedient to their husbands....

so, well, it still goes on....



[edit on 17-6-2010 by dawnstar]

Originally posted by dawnstar

oh, I didn't realize how late it was, and my husband will be home soon...He doesn't want me posting on this board!!! I'd better get off now....

all the while these women were trying to con other women into believing that God wanted them to be submissive and obedient to their husbands....

so, well, it still goes on....

No - I wouldn't be surprised. I've seen a lot.

I've been on forums for at leat 10 years - - starting with ICQ

Oops! Double post.

[edit on 17-6-2010 by Annee]

Oops! Again - don't know what happened

[edit on 17-6-2010 by Annee]

reply to post by Annee

Actually, in our chosen lifestyle i do ask his permission to do certain things, and there are times he doesnt allow me to do something..this doesnt mean i am a door mat, far from it.. but as you say, back then it wasnt a choice, and its in the freedom to make that choice for ones self now that is the difference, so yes, i do very much see your points as well.. and its why i love this place (ATS), its not to argue as much as to exchange view points and ideas, which is a great thing in our world i think..sometimes things get heated as human emotion goes, but its still a good thing. I am a very strong willed person, and opinionated and i always think for myself, i am not a 'yes women' at all, but in our marriage we chose the 'old fashioned' route i suppose and i ask his permission and i listen to his wishes as his wife out of respect.. not to say i do not at times challange his decisions, i certainly do.. but again, its been our choice over the years to live this way and to adopt said view points..

reply to post by Full_Vision


Is there any paticular reason you choose to live that way? Just out of interest, i'm not judging you, i fully respect your decision to live however you want, i just want to understand the why of it.

Originally posted by Full_Vision
reply to post by Annee

 

Actually, in our chosen lifestyle i do ask his permission to do certain things, and there are times he doesnt allow me to do something..this doesnt mean i am a door mat, far from it.. but as you say, back then it wasnt a choice, and its in the freedom to make that choice for ones self now that is the difference, so yes, i do very much see your points as well.. and its why i love this place.

Thank you. Yes there are courtesies in a relationship. It is give & take.

And the difference is Freedom of Choice.

There are things I will ask my husband about - - and he will express his concerns. But now I can say - - I understand your concerns but its important to me and something I really want to do.

In my first marriage - - I just accepted what ever decision he made - - without even questioning it.

Originally posted by sodakota
I think the Feminist Movement destroyed "gentlemen." No longer are they allowed, encouraged, or taught how to treat and respect women.

I'm old fashioned, I still enjoy men opening a door for me, and the polite conversation that follows. "Thank you and... You're welcome."

I was raised to open doors for women, pull the chair out, pay for the dinner and all of that stuff. Of course i ran into the type of feminist you described who were deeply offended over such things. I was also raised to open doors for old people or help them if they're in need (like picking something up in a shop if it's heavy).

However i also came to realise something. If you want rquality then why do you expect a man to open the door for you, why should he pay for dinner, why should he basically pay you extra respect just because you're a woman.

This kind of confusing message is the problem with feminism. It was supposed to be equality but it turned into something rather horrible because of a few extremists. Now men are in limbo over a number of issues and often we are in trouble no matter what we do.

If we pay for dinner maybe we're a chauvinist, if we don't pay then we're cheap, see the problem? Personally i'm for equality, complete equality because i know a number of women who have taken men out just because they wanted a free dinner. These are perfectly nice women, my friends actually but it's still wrong.

Oh and go to a nightclub sometime, women get free drinks from guys and then walk off laughing, sad to see but it happens. Then again i've only been to a nightclub twice in my life so maybe i only saw the bad parts

I would like to bring to the attention of everyone in this thread a subject of hypocrisy within the feminist movement that is utterly disgusting, maybe the most disgusting issue

www.abovetopsecret.com...

Take a look at that thread. Many people who are up in arms about the genital mutilation of girls and yet men are regularly mutilated. The UN has declared the mutilation of female genitals a crime, and rightly so! Yet men are regularly mutilated, every single day in the USA and in other countries boys have their foreskin chopped off.

Not only is this accepted, it is promoted by women who say that an uncircumcised penis looks horrible. Women actively want mens genitals mutilated for aesthetic purposes. The other way around this is seen as horrific, criminal. Having your foreskin chopped off reduces your pleasure during sex and this is the exact same reason that women foreskins are chopped off, yet one way is fine and the other is criminal.

The extreme feminists need to take a very careful look at what their movement has become.

Originally posted by ImaginaryReality1984

Not only is this accepted, it is promoted by women who say that an uncircumcised penis looks horrible. Women actively want mens genitals mutilated for aesthetic purposes. The other way around this is seen as horrific, criminal. Having your foreskin chopped off reduces your pleasure during sex and this is the exact same reason that women foreskins are chopped off, yet one way is fine and the other is criminal.

The extreme feminists need to take a very careful look at what their movement has become.

OK - come on now - - how is this feminist? I object to this "reach".

Circumcision came long before any woman's rights movement. And it was not women that came up with either male or female circumcision. It was again - Man.

My daughter talked with her Male doctor before circumcizing her son. It was HIS recommendation for health & cleanliness.

I was single in the Free Love 70s/80s - - never once saw an uncircumcized man. Its probably a surprise to almost any woman.

Let's talk about mutilating breasts with implants for men.

reply to post by Annee


Firstly i implants for women are not comparable because the decision about the persons body is done by the same adult. It's the womans body and so she chooses to do it.

The reason it's a feminist issue is because many women have this attitude that the male penis is disgusting unless it's cut, as for your male doctor, i hate to say it but doctors in the US seem to be more about the profit than the care. They earn money from circumcision. Oh and as for cleanliness, lol just wash behind the skin and you're just as clean as a cut man. The difference is that men who are cut have a higher rate of hardened, cracking foreskin. This is a nasty little condition.

It's a feminist movement because the driving force is most certainly female however lets be absolutely clear. If a woman has her genitals mutilated it is a crime, if a man does then it's absolutely ok. Doesn't that striek you as inequality?

Originally posted by ImaginaryReality1984

The reason it's a feminist issue is because many women have this attitude that the male penis is disgusting unless it's cut.

This is ridiculous. And it is not feminist. You are seriously reaching with this viewpoint.

Its more about familiarity then anything else. Few women have ever seen an uncircumcized penis.

Circumcision is mostly cultural based.

Feel free - - - I'm done with this direction.

[edit on 18-6-2010 by Annee]

reply to post by Annee


Cultural yep and i hate to inform you of this but men who don't have it done are often pressured by WOMEN and not men. It's a culture promoted by women not men. The doctors don't count simply because they are out for profit.

Hate it all you like but it is true.

the doctor who delivered my kids advised me to have them circumcised.
the pediatrician that I had selected to take care of the kids advised me not to.
the pediatrician was a female, the doctor who delivered them was a male...
I asked the pediatrician why she was saying one thing, and he another.
she said that it was him who would be doing the proceedure, thus it was him who was making the money for it....
she was looking out for the kids, and no, as long as they were taught proper hygene, there was no medical reason for a circumscision....
my kids are not circumcised needless to say!!!

reply to post by Full_Vision

does he ask you for permission to do certain things also??
just wondering...
I mean, I'll ask before I take anything out of the checking account, but well, if he at least didn't consult with me before buying something that put us in a major bind....
well, I don't think all of my paycheck would be going into that account anymore...and no, I wouldn't ask for permission to react this way.

Originally posted by dawnstar
.
I asked the pediatrician why she was saying one thing, and he another.
she said that it was him who would be doing the proceedure, thus it was him who was making the money for it....

Oh come on - - you really believe every doctor who recommends circumcision - - does so because they get paid? I don't believe that.

Things have changed. It used to be routine without even thinking about it.

Its only when we started - our culture - to think of being natural - - beginning with the hippie generation - - that it was even questioned.

I would bet percentage wise there are far more female doctors leaning toward natural and natural medicine then there are male doctors.

--------------------------------------------

But - what does that have to do with Feminism? Nothing.

Personal preference is personal preference. It has nothing to do with Feminism.

If a woman fell in love with a man who was uncircumcised - - she would just accept it.

No different then a man who loves big breasts - - falls in love with a woman with small breasts. He isn't going to care.

reply to post by Annee

I'll admit, my pediatrician mentioned those other reasons for it....

but she did mention that doctor being the one doing the surgery, and thus, being paid for it as on of the reasons.....

I made my decision on very few words that they said during the conversation...basically that there really were no medical reason to have it done as long as proper hygene was taught, and the pain the baby would feel and the possibilities of problems popping up because of the surgery was pretty good medical reasons to not have it done.

oh, and my pediatrician was very much into natural remedies and quite conscious of her patients financial budgets. I went through a time with my first son where he was constantly getting bad diaper rashes (wic insisted that I start him on juices too young, and this was causing the rashes), and I just couldn't get them to clear up. she told me I had a choice, I could go get this expensive perscription drug that might work...or I could just go home and use crisco.....and it would be just as good.....later during the meeting she found out that he was drinking juice, and well....once I quite giving him the juice, using the crisco, it cleared up....

I'm not knocking those who have their boys circumcised really....to each their own. but, I saw no reason...outside of religion.....for my boys to have to go through it. and, I don't think that God intended for his followers to inflice that type of pain onto such helpless victims.

as far as sexual attractiveness....well, seems to me that if a women would let that be the deciding factor in weather or not a man is worthy of her, well....I don't know, I kind of think she would be rather shallow or something. probably ain't worth the time and energy to foster much of a relationship with anyways.....

reply to post by SearchLightsInc

Its difficult to explain entirely why we chose the life we have, other than we personally just feel its..right i guess.. in a lot of ways we do work as a team and are extremely close friends, and if i really want to do something he isnt happy with me doing we will discuss the pros and cons of it, instead of it being a straight domineering 'no you are not' kind of thing.. there are many i have met online and in life over the years that live the same sort of life, some more to extremes than my partner and i though..he doesnt control my every waking moment, but he does have final say in many matters.. again, i think we both feel it to be as natural to us due to upbringing in some ways, watching parents and grandparents for example in how the home life was set up, so in many ways its a very old fashioned view, but again, in this day and age we have the choice to live that way or to not..

Most women i know that don't share the same lifestyle views can often get angry at the very thought of such a situation.. and i certainly do accept it is not for everyone, its just hard for me on the other side of that to accept an overly domineering female, for example my mother in law who has 2 sons and a husband, one of the sons thankfully escaped, but his brother and father cater to her selfishness and catty behaviour in fear of upsetting the household or family all together..to me that isnt right and she shouldnt have taken such a role over them, especially when the son in question is nearly 32, never dated, never has done anything because the mother wouldnt approve, and at 30+ years of age she still controls every paycheck he works his ass off for. i cant help that that situation makes me very aggrivated to see, and sadly it isnt just this one family, its many..and in ways its also a cultural difference i think, growing up in the US its more a Patriarchal society where here its more Matriarchal..which would have to affect cultural views i would think..
there is more to it for anyone curious, U2U me as i dont want to go into it all here..
but again, women today have the choice on what path to follow instead of being pushed into a sexist role by society which is a wonderful thing in itself.