How easily accessible is your child's teacher? What is your grading system for behavior?

I'm curious how other countries are with access to their child's teacher. My son is in kindergarten, last year he was in VPK at another public school. Well this morning I wanted to talk to his teacher before school for a few mins and was given a look like I had a third eye. They asked if I had an appointment. I was like no I didn't know I needed one. I never needed one last year. If I needed to talk to the teacher before school I could. I was then told to send her an email to set an appointment.

When did schools get like this? I remember never needing an appointment to talk to a teacher. I want to understand this behavior rating system they use. It's colors and that is it. So I called the school to make a stupid appointment and the lady said she would send me the chart on the system and I said no I don't need the chart. I want to know what my son is doing to get on yellow. The colors are blue, green, yellow, orange and red. He's 5 and of course he won't tell me what he did so the only option is the teacher. Last year his teacher wrote about his day every day!' So I knew what he was up to and what he wasn't doing. This color system makes zero sense to me. How can I address these problems if I don't know what they are?

How do your schools rate kids? Do you have a similar system? Is it like an act of God to talk to a teacher?

I am not a fan of the public school system in the states especially Florida. It seems as if they want little drone kids and parents who don't ask questions. It's only been two weeks and anytime I ask a question I'm met with funny looks. EVERYTHING is online or email! Nothing is personal anymore. It's not like his school is huge, there's probably only 300 kids at most in the whole school. I went to this school and boy have times really changed!

Teachers are extremely busy individuals who are trying to cram a ton of preparation in at the start of the day so that the can begin their activities on time.

The teacher was probably not anticipating that he or she would potentially have to spend that time talking to you. Have there been any changes in policy around teacher prep time? That could explain it.

My source is being engaged to a teacher.

originally posted by: hombero
Teachers are extremely busy individuals who are trying to cram a ton of preparation in at the start of the day so that the can begin their activities on time.

The teacher was probably not anticipating that he or she would potentially have to spend that time talking to you. Have there been any changes in policy around teacher prep time? That could explain it.

My source is being engaged to a teacher.

School just started. They don't tell you anything. It's always "go online." Yea no that's crap. I never had to make an appointment last year to talk to his teacher. I highly doubt 5 mins will cramp their day. I work and the times they want are when I work so all I have is before school. I don't get paid to miss work which I had to miss two days already because of their stupid staggered start crap. I didn't get paid for that!

a reply to: mblahnikluver

The only time my parents had "access" to teachers was on Parents Night. Or via appointment. (Parents Night is where parents can come after work and talk one on one to the teacher with the pupil present. Any and all problems and concerns are discussed. I might have the name wrong too, it was a long time ago.)

Classes must start on time. I can't expect a bus driver to stop his route while I ask him about the service history of his vehicle. You can also write a letter/e-mail, I'm sure you would receive a reply to any questions you may have.

Our preschool (Linc starts his second year of pre-k this year! wooo! ) goes by "exceeds expectations, meets expectations, does not meet expectations, sometimes, and never." then lists off a bunch of behaviors. I personally don't pay too much attention to some of them like for example he got "running and jumping - sometimes meets expectations" What....? He's a 3 year old with autism I guarantee he runs, and JUMPS with the best of them, he has never ending jump energy. But other things are important to me like, is he getting along appropriately with others, is he eating well, is he trying to use the potty at school, etc..... It's like a 2 page report, very detailed, a lot of behaviors listed-so I mainly look at the things I can't monitor from home, or that I suspect make him change his typical behaviors from home to school and see if any concerns jump out.

I have found with his preschool teacher, and thank god he has her this year too, I can email her, talk to her on the spot, ask to sit in on a day of preschool, what ever I want, and she will make sure we are accommodated and knowledgeable about what's going on. Every concern has been addressed. I can only hope that things will stay like this when he enters kindergarten at the same elementary school.

Sorry to hear you're having some trouble getting on the same page with your kids district. Personally I wouldn't like a "color" system, especially if they are so unwilling to talk or disclose more information.

-Alee

P.S. We are in Ohio, we are trying hard to move to Florida by 2020 but the more I read about their school systems the more I wonder if Ohios was more of a blessing than I realized as a kid.

originally posted by: LightSpeedDriver
a reply to: mblahnikluver

The only time my parents had "access" to teachers was on Parents Night. Or via appointment. (Parents Night is where parents can come after work and talk one on one to the teacher with the pupil present. Any and all problems and concerns are discussed. I might have the name wrong too, it was a long time ago.)

Classes must start on time. I can't expect a bus driver to stop his route while I ask him about the service history of his vehicle. You can also write a letter/e-mail, I'm sure you would receive a reply to any questions you may have.

I was there long before classes start so 5 mins won't kill start time. I don't like email. It's not personal and in my experience people BS in emails. It takes ten times longer to communicate via email than a 5 min conversation.

We have two ways for everyday communication.

The teacher uses the ClassroomDojo app where you can see almost realtime the points both your kid and the whole class get for behavior or misbehavior and they're usually categorized. I think last week he had all kinds of good points for being on task and following directions, etc., both for himself and as part of whole class and then the whole class got one negative point for not following directions.

The app adds each day up into a percent report.

They also use Seesaw to track assignments. I haven't seen how exactly that works as there's been nothing posted on it yet.

Each child also has a classroom folder that goes home. One pocket is for to the classroom, and the other is for coming home. His first grade teacher had a special note sheet she kept in there for back and forth communication. I haven't yet tried sending a note to this year's teacher to see what will happen, but she doesn't have the special note sheet. He has a dentist appointment in September though, so I'll find out.

Generally speaking, the few times I've had to go to the school directly, the administration has been very responsive. It's clear the principal cares and loves the kids which is really what you need.

Do they have a parents' back to school night? A lot of that stuff can be explained by the teacher at that time.

Truly, there is no accountability to you, the parent, in a public school. They are civil servants-they are very controlled by their principals and the government. Also, they are told what to say to parents. Teachers that are parent-friendly are frowned upon and punished by the system.

If you want true open dialog-find a good private school that actually likes parents and their children. I found this true the hard way and I was PTA president, etc.

a reply to: NerdGoddess

Yea in preschool and VPK last year I never had this. I just want clarification of what he is doing to get on yellow. How can I address it if I don't know?! Giving me a generic list of what the colors means does nothing. I hate the color system and j can't stand the treasure box, don't get me started on that. Next year he will go to Montessori. I missed the grant deadline so I couldn't send him unless I paid $800 a month! Can't afford that. I know for how my son is he would do best in that setting. He did fine in VPK and had issues with talking (I was always in trouble for that lol) and not sitting still. He never sits still! How can I force him to sit still. He moves around while sitting. He has a short attention span if he is bored. He is a lot like me as a kid. If I wasn't challenged I was bored, talking and not paying attention.

I sent his teacher a text. Hopefully she will respond and I can ask my one question that seems to be an act of God to do.

Oh don't come to Florida!!!!! Nooooooo. Seriously I have lived here my whole life. It's terrible. It's expensive and pay is terrible. It's a "right to" state in every way. I plan on moving overseas with my BF and if we don't move there I'm going to Oregon. I can't take Florida anymore. I really dislike it.

originally posted by: ketsuko
Do they have a parents' back to school night? A lot of that stuff can be explained by the teacher at that time.

I don't need it explained in general terms. I want to know what my son is doing. They have back to school night and it's only 45 mins. How is a teacher supposed to talk to parents with only 45mins. It's like they don't want parents involved unless they are in the PTA and giving money. I am not a PTA mom as those people usually make me want to vomit with how uninformed they are.

originally posted by: mblahnikluver

originally posted by: ketsuko
Do they have a parents' back to school night? A lot of that stuff can be explained by the teacher at that time.

I don't need it explained in general terms. I want to know what my son is doing. They have back to school night and it's only 45 mins. How is a teacher supposed to talk to parents with only 45mins. It's like they don't want parents involved unless they are in the PTA and giving money. I am not a PTA mom as those people usually make me want to vomit with how uninformed they are.

I can imagine it's frustrating not knowing exactly what your child is doing to garner such a rating- because as parents we just want to know, is it something we can help them with, or is it something they have to figure out on their own, or are the teachers just slanging ratings around willy nilly with no regard for how the parent and child will feel? We just want to be able to coach them to be their best selves, and a great peer in the classroom setting. I'm not sure why it's so hard for them to say, heres what little "Silas" is doing.

-Alee.

Never needed an appointment at my kid's elementary school where I am in Alberta. They had an open door policy for parents to come in, even during school hours.

After that point, it was by appointment unless the school called for you to come in for a disciplinary issue.

a reply to: mblahnikluver
My oldest just got into Middle School. His Middle School utilizes an internal social media style platform for remote communication for parents to contact teachers and get the full disclosure on their grades. I can simply login from home, go to the specific teacher in question and review my childs grades only viewable to the parent with their specific login. I am not sure how they pulled that off but it works for now.

Basically since I am logging in uner the one I have, I will only see my child's grades and not the grades of others. Tele and video conferencing is also available. But that middle school does not currently enforce a strict closed campus policy so I could still just want on campus and catch one of the teachers between classes for a chat.

The elementry school was very simple, and two of my other four kids are still there. It used to be simple to just walk to the classroom and have a chat whenever necessary. However this year they are enforcing the closed campus policy, so no one is allowed to enter past the main office during school hours now without turning heaven and earth for an exception. Of course every month or so they do hold conference nights where we go for a time slot to discuss their performance.

a reply to: mblahnikluver

When my two very active children were in school-all the way to high school-I was always in the PTA because those parents were always the ones who knew what was going on at the school and how to navigate the system. I volunteered also in classrooms as well as committees so I would know. I did this in the private schools, too. Honestly, it is the most important job you will ever have and you always have to be your child's advoate and if you don't understand the system and the teacher's own system and how to use it to your child's benefit you will not do well. I was grateful for those PTA parent's who taught me the realty of the "school system."

a reply to: mblahnikluver

K level teachers are little more than babysitters.

Why on earth do you need to schedule an appointment to have a 10 minute talk?!

Good luck mblah

a reply to: NarcolepticBuddha
My third son just entered Kindergarten. As bright as he is, he is actually learning things in school. So please do not discredit their capacity to teach, it is not fair to them or the students who do learn things. His desire to read more has increased and we read together now instead of me just reading to him occasionally. I really like that.

originally posted by: NarcolepticBuddha
a reply to: mblahnikluver

K level teachers are little more than babysitters.

Why on earth do you need to schedule an appointment to have a 10 minute talk?!

Good luck mblah

Because where do you stop? How do you decide which parent is the most deserving of that ten minutes? Would you be pleased as a parent if the teacher was constantly late to teaching the class because they had to talk to parents who have concerns? I wouldn't. They have a system in place and time allotted to deal with parent queries. Similarly, I should imagine if they have concerns that they need to discuss with a parent, they will make an appointment and not just expect the parent to drop everything there and then. And I am sure that then that allows them the ability to answer more urgent parent-teacher problems should they arise. Seems fair to me.

a reply to: NerdGoddess

Alee, you should seriously rethink Florida unless you are wealthy and Hispanic, otherwise you will be viewed as dirt. It really is just that simple. The attitude there is purely awful. Last time I was in Miami, I realized I wasnt even in the US anymore and man, they are hostile.

originally posted by: mblahnikluver
He did fine in VPK and had issues with talking (I was always in trouble for that lol) and not sitting still. He never sits still! How can I force him to sit still. He moves around while sitting. He has a short attention span if he is bored. He is a lot like me as a kid. If I wasn't challenged I was bored, talking and not paying attention.

You can't force them to sit still you have to make them want to sit still, reward is one way, diversion is another, that's what worked for my son. You can get these special texturally rich bracelets that they can be given when they need to sit and listen. The teachers at my son's primary school generally wanted to see me rather than the other way round. I worked with them, supporting their strategies and things went very, very well, he's turned out great. I never understood the grading system, he's at secondary school, they've introduced a new one, and I still don't understand it. He does though, and he knows what he wants out of it, so I don't really need to.

I really like something that Pink said recently, that you have to teach your kids how to follow the rules before you teach them how to break them. I agree wholeheartedly with that.

It's a learning curve, and you, from this point on you have less and less control, but have confidence in your parenting, let the schools do what they do knowing that you more than make up for any short-comings at home.