Moments Around Good Friends, That Make You Feel Lonely

a reply to: HeathenJessie

Oh God I build fences that's why I said it, it was meant as "work on a project together".
You can stop proving how stupid you are. I totally got that.

a reply to: Peeple

Or, in laymans terms...

You treat men and women differently based on...just because - polite?

So an inherent, sexist bias is polite? Nice.

a reply to: Peeple

The only thing I've proved, thus far, is that you are simply making it up as you go.

Which is why you continue to trip yourself up.

a reply to: Peeple

I treat people as male or female friends, why do you need the ladies and gentlemen labels?
The labels are meaningless if they are not describing sexist behaviour or attitudes.
You know, treating people differently because of their sex.

a reply to: grainofsand

I didn't take you as a non-binary progressive? If you are good for you.
In my daily life there are mostly binary people and the women tend to have slightly different interests than men. Like in a, the men want to have sex with the women and the women with men, kind of way.
If your circle is different and they all don't discriminate at all then... wow, good for you if you're into that.

Once you cross the friends line you're asexual and beyond the ladies and gentlemen zone anyways. Unless you're not only progressive but also a commune hippy who has only friends with benefits?
Not to judge, but not a lifestyle for everybody.

a reply to: Peeple

It's more simple than that in my social groups, sex is just okay if it's consensual.
Telling someone you are a exactly attracted to them is also okay.
Is your world different?

a reply to: grainofsand

I might have a different definition of who is a friend? The thought of having sex with a friend is just disturbing.
Like with a family member.

From this:

originally posted by: Peeple
a reply to: HeathenJessie

Oh God I build fences that's why I said it, it was meant as "work on a project together".
You can stop proving how stupid you are. I totally got that.

To this:

originally posted by: Peeple
a reply to: grainofsand

I might have a different definition of who is a friend? The thought of having sex with a friend is just disturbing.
Like with a family member.

In a single page...you simply can't make this stuff up. The only thing I'll give you credit for is your avatar, it actually reflects the person behind it quite accurately.

Is Forrest Gump a hero of yours by any chance?

a reply to: Peeple

Your perception of course, you don't speak for society.

a reply to: grainofsand

No. Peeple does not speak for society, and I believe it is worth pointing out that no one in this thread does, or has even tried to.

However, it is also worth pointing out, that society ought to be able to contain both points of view, without overmuch problem. The problems start arising when people fail to respect one another well enough to simply accept a differing point of view than their own. For example, I have no problem with people living their lives, their way. But I do insist that people offer me the same space and freedom, and that requires acceptance of my position as being as valid as anyone elses on the matters involved, not lambasted over my position. Different folks, and all that.

Again, that is not what this thread is about. It is legitimate for me to be somewhat aggrieved by my friends behaviour toward me, since they know me better than that. It would be illegitimate for me to be aggrieved at the fact that they do not subscribe to my lifestyle choices, for the same reason that it was wrong of them to recommend pursuit of a sexual encounter at that juncture. Simply put, they should have known better than to enforce or recommend their value system, when they know full well that mine is very important to me.

a reply to: TrueBrit

Well said True, and I agree completely!

It is legitimate for me to be somewhat aggrieved by my friends behaviour toward me,

theyre youre friends, get knew ones if you dont like them.

its easy to say they should know better, you should know better.

a reply to: Rikku

He didn't say he didn't like them. If he didn't like them, they wouldn't be his friends. Re-read what he just wrote to get a better understanding.

One thing is for certain that I get from this topic. In my opinion, it's better to wait for sex until marriage. Waiting, and patience gives you more strength in character. Sex is a primitive, and basic lustful desire when wanting it instantly, or doing it instantly without actually wanting to commit to something greater then yourself, which is children.

a reply to: Bankaikiller

Why do you think it's 'better' to save sex until marriage and only then to create babies?
What's wrong with consensual recreational sex?

originally posted by: grainofsand
a reply to: Bankaikiller

Why do you think it's 'better' to save sex until marriage and only then to create babies?
What's wrong with consensual recreational sex?

Because thats just how I feel about it. Simple.

In the context of "sleeping around," you and I are much the same TB.

It is in that similarity that I say your friends were probably giving you crap because of "how you are," rather than any sort of memory lapse. In other words, they did it because they DO know you.

I might never have reacted quite as extremely as you, but my own friends simply did it because it was a topic to give me crap about. We all have ours, and male friendships can frequently involve good-natured ribbing.

From their eyes, it might very well have the opposite perception as yours, in that they see it as inclusive behavior to a close-knit group rather than isolating.

With my own friends/family, I have always known their good nature towards me, and annoying tendency to sometimes know me better than I know myself, so I take such things in those context.

a reply to: Serdgiam

But...one of the friends was asking True to shag the young lady within ear shot of the young ladies own Mother. That was disrespectful.

a reply to: Night Star

Lol, are you stealing British words now
Agreed about lad banter in earshot of someones mother, definitely bad form.

a reply to: Night Star

I would have to agree.

Frequently the banter crosses various lines, due to its very nature. Though, to be blunt, many guys just aren't going to care about a random persons reaction if they have a chance to needle their buddy. This increases in proportion to drinks consumed, frequently due to volume alone.

From what I have seen, it is behavior that baffles most women and, indeed, many men. Even the ones that participate in it.

"Disrespect" is pretty much the very core of the banter. Its easy for some guys to hit targets they didn't intend to hit, in the rush to get a bit of a jab in.