This question is a big one. Like those philosophical conundrums in books that try to help us think about what we would do.
I made conscious decisions about these things when my children were very small. Although by then I had largely abandoned "religiosity", there were
things that I expected would come up and I forced myself to consider how I would respond/react.
The worst case, of course, is "what if one of my children died?" And the unimaginable pain that would bring still frightens me. I believe I would go
mad. But, let's talk about more mundane issues.
Specifically this: If you are a Conservative Bible-Believing Christian - or a Muslim who supports killing 'gays' - or anyone else who DUE TO
RELIGIOUS CONVICTIONS abhors the "gays" - what will you do if your child announces to you that they are a boy trapped in a girl's body, or that they
are simply gay? What if your straight male child falls in love with a wonderful, beautiful girl who turns out to be transgendered? Or tells you
their best friend is gay?
I REALLY want participants to think this over.
Likewise, suppose you find out that your child has been using drugs for years without your knowledge; or is a pick-pocket or armed robber?
You Christians like to talk about gays as "abominations" and "sinners" - and that's easy to do when it's not your kid.....
WHAT IF IT HAPPENS?
I had a client years ago who was brought up in a strict Catholic family. As a 40-year old gay man, he struggled DAILY with fear that he would
actually go to hell, and suffered with the ostracization/rejection of his parents. He was miserable, but managing to live his life as close to
truthfully as he could.
Would you disown your child FOR ANY REASON?
And if so, what do you hope to gain by doing that?
If not, how would you adjust your presumed "horror" response to allow you to continue to love and be supportive of your child?
I ask this not to bait anyone, but to stimulate the thought process of "what if."
So - again: If you have a small child, or are planning to have children, imagine what you would do if they turned out to be gay?
When my son was born, in a public hospital serving the uninsured, I was given a questionnaire. (I already had a 2-year old daughter who was born in a
modern, state-of-the-art birthing center). One of the questions was:
what do you want your child to be when he or she grows up? (Examples such as "doctor, firefighter, lawyer, teacher, artist, athlete, etc" were
My response was: HAPPY.
There is NOTHING my children could do that would make me stop loving them. Parenting is a seat-of-the-pants adventure. Even the most well-equipped,
educated parent will meet with surprises along the way. It's a skill and an important part of parenting to mentally prepare oneself for 'unpleasant'
or 'confusing' or 'bewildering' circumstances.
After all, to have children is to have a part of your heart walking around outside of you.
I hope you all will give it some thought if you have never done so.
edit on 8/19/2015 by BuzzyWigs because: fine. I changed the title.
edit on 8/19/2015 by BuzzyWigs because: Sweet Jesus - so
many "editors" -- can people just talk without being attacked?