Obesephobe - could this be a new word for the 21st century?

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posted on May, 3 2014 @ 05:28 PM
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I placed this topic as a social issue because it seemed to be the most appropriate in my opinion.

A few weeks ago I was at a party chatting to a female friend, who asked me if I was interested in another mutual female friend because she had seen we get along/have laughs/enjoy each others company during group social events.
I replied something like "Not a chance, she's way too big for my liking" and was met with "Aw that's horrible, you can't say that!".
There followed an exchange of arguments where I explained that I am generally repulsed by fat people, and although I don't care how many sticky buns someone wants to eat if they are happy, I could only be 'forced' into arousal with an obese person in a desert island shipwreck situation where I had no other choice other than DIY.

The reaction surprised me - "How uncaring! So what if you were with a partner and a medical condition suddenly made her fat?"
My reply: "I would stick with her because it was not her fault and I presume I would already be in love with her as well, but if a partner became fat for eating too much crap food and not burning the energy off, I would probably not want to hang around."
Friend: "Oh that's so shallow"
Me: "What, are there social rules now that we should be attracted to everyone?"
Friend: "No, but I think you are being unkind"

I was pretty gobsmacked to be honest. Has it really become the case that it is unacceptable for a person to not be attracted to someone for visual/aesthetic reasons?
I couldn't give a toss how fat someone is but if they are they will not be the object of my desires, what is wrong with that?
Does this make me some kind of thought/lust criminal in this politically correct world?

If someone has a medical condition causing obesity then I feel sympathy for them of course, but they are the minority, and I still would not want to share a bed with them.
The girl in question DOES NOT have any medical condition, she just eats too much crap food and lives a sedentary lifestyle.
I eat loads of crappy high corn syrup/trans fat food but my work is very physical most days so I am not fat. I used to work a desk job but still I was not fat as I ate less, intentionally - take in no more energy than you burn off.

It isn't rocket science (excluding metabolic/medical conditions) but then the majority of obese people have only themselves to blame...it is why I am not attracted to fat people.

When did society become so sensitive that honest answers to questions about attraction are unacceptable if an individuals size is the reason why you don't find them attractive? Do we have to start pretending now and finding other reasons?!

Is obesephobe going to be the new buzzword of the future?



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posted on May, 3 2014 @ 05:40 PM
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No, just no.

Look, tough love time.

Medical condition or no.

1 calorie, is one calorie.

If you shove more into your system, than you expend, any medical condition, or lack there of, YOU WILL GET FAT.

Period.

No apologizing, no nothing, Just truth.

And If you GET FAT, there will be health risk, and consequences.

That is your right to kill yourself with,

Just like a smoker,

Or alcoholic,

Don't try to sell me on the "okay" of it.

Or make me into a "Hater" or "obese-phobe" For stating a basic truth life forgot to teach you. (not the op, just in general)
edit on 3-5-2014 by benrl because: (no reason given)



posted on May, 3 2014 @ 05:45 PM
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a reply to: benrl
Nice to see I'm not alone here, cheers.
For the record, I dont hate, or phobe/fear fat people, I am just repulsed by what I see - but it appears that some folk find that unacceptable these days?



posted on May, 3 2014 @ 05:53 PM
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So your friend asked you to be **** buddies with someone fat? or am I reading this out of context?



posted on May, 3 2014 @ 05:56 PM
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a reply to: Versus
Thin female friend was asking me if I was interested in being intimate male/female friend with fat mutual friend.
That's as clear as I can script it.



posted on May, 3 2014 @ 05:58 PM
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Personally I think you sound like an arrogant, judgemental asshat who doesn't deserve the love or affection of any woman.

Hopefully future female prospects quickly learn the truth of who you really are and run the hell away.

How disgusting.



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posted on May, 3 2014 @ 06:01 PM
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a reply to: Kryties
Do you not find certain elements of a person more attractive than others? I do.
Which bits of my statements trouble you?


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posted on May, 3 2014 @ 06:04 PM
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originally posted by: Kryties
Personally I think you sound like an arrogant, judgemental asshat who doesn't deserve the love or affection of any woman.

Hopefully future female prospects quickly learn the truth of who you really are and run the hell away.

How disgusting.



How is his stance any different than someone who chooses not to associate with smokers, or is an drinkers?

"Oh he abuses a substance excessively to ease some kind of disorder they have not outwardly dealt with, would you like to hang out with that person? " is that a more PC way of saying it?

Me, Sure, Ill hang out with a smoker or drinker, doesn't effect me.

might someone else though.

How is food abuse any worse than say a chronic Cigarette addiction, that it needs to get a special pass for tolerance?

edit on 3-5-2014 by benrl because: (no reason given)



posted on May, 3 2014 @ 06:04 PM
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a reply to: grainofsand

There has been another long term agenda in play socially that says, "You must love me for how I am." This belief is allowed because it means they don't have to do anything about their weight and health. Laziness is the word that comes to mind.

Like you I am repulsed by the feeling of large fat deposits and am rarely attracted to anyone obese as more than just a friend. I am slim and basically healthy. I choose who I desire to be with on my own terms, just as they have their own terms.

Stuff these burgeoning social pressures where the sun don't shine, I say.



posted on May, 3 2014 @ 06:06 PM
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originally posted by: grainofsand
a reply to: benrl
Nice to see I'm not alone here, cheers.
For the record, I dont hate, or phobe/fear fat people, I am just repulsed by what I see - but it appears that some folk find that unacceptable these days?



I find anyone that does anything to excess intolerable, even the overly healthy people.
edit on 3-5-2014 by benrl because: (no reason given)



posted on May, 3 2014 @ 06:09 PM
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originally posted by: grainofsand
I was pretty gobsmacked to be honest. Has it really become the case that it is unacceptable for a person to not be attracted to someone for visual/aesthetic reasons?


Ha! If you let the liberals have their way.

Ill be attracted to who I want to be attracted to.
edit on 3-5-2014 by smithjustinb because: (no reason given)



posted on May, 3 2014 @ 06:09 PM
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a reply to: benrl
It does seem to be the case that dislike of fat bodies is becoming non PC...It is why I'm expecting the word obesephobe to be in the Oxford dictionary in the next few years...tragic.



posted on May, 3 2014 @ 06:10 PM
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originally posted by: smithjustinbIll be attracted to who I want to be attracted to.

Same



posted on May, 3 2014 @ 06:12 PM
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a reply to: grainofsand

Schlotskys with 1/2 dozen cinnabons sounds awesome about now...and a large diet coke.



posted on May, 3 2014 @ 06:12 PM
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a reply to: Oldie48
Agreed



posted on May, 3 2014 @ 06:13 PM
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Isn't "Obesephobe" pretty much the same as Cacomorphobe/ia? And rolls better off the tongue.
edit on 3-5-2014 by Versus because: (no reason given)



posted on May, 3 2014 @ 06:16 PM
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The OP gives no regard or thought to the fact that many obese people cannot help it, as obesity can also be genetic or as a result of depression or some other medical conditions.

All I saw in this thread were people disgusted at the 'fat people' for eating too much.

The ignorance displayed in this thread is astonishing.



posted on May, 3 2014 @ 06:19 PM
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I completely agree with you. Your friend sounds self-righteous, I bet if you posed the same question to her about one of your fat male friends she'd say no for the exact same reason you did...although women tend to be a little more discrete/tactful/find an alternate excuse to cover up the real reason they said no.

Let's face it, all of us have a natural instinct to want to mate with healthy people and a good majority will steer clear of obese people for the same reason we steer clear of people that are clearly psychologically unstable. It's natural to want your partner to be healthy and it's wrong to make people feel bad because they're following their biological instincts.

There's always going to be people that don't care about weight but they'll almost always be in the (vocal) minority and sometimes they say it more out of being concerned bout appearing superficial than genuinely not caring about size. My wife's a good example. When I first met her she almost wrote me off straight away because I was close to 20kg overweight, but ended up marrying me because I treated her well. Now that we've been married a few years, she's started buying me gym memberships, feeding me rabbit food and getting unusually supportive of anything I want to do that involves exercise (tbh I love her for it because I know the weight needs to go).



posted on May, 3 2014 @ 06:19 PM
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a reply to: Versus
I stand corrected, didn't know there was a word for 'fear' of fat people.
I don't actually fear them, just wouldnt wanna be intimate with one...urgh.


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posted on May, 3 2014 @ 06:20 PM
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originally posted by: Kryties
The OP gives no regard or thought to the fact that many obese people cannot help it, as obesity can also be genetic or as a result of depression or some other medical conditions.

All I saw in this thread were people disgusted at the 'fat people' for eating too much.

The ignorance displayed in this thread is astonishing.


Regardless of how a person came to be overweight, there's nothing wrong with publicly stating you are not attracted to someone because of them being overweight. If you don't feel attracted to someone because of their weight, that's your business. No one has the right to tell you what to be attracted to.





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