Mini-Food-Rant

So, help me understand here...why, pray tell, do they make the peanut butter jar so tall that you can't get the peanut butter out of the jar without getting peanut butter all over your hand???

And..why is it that someone always calls you on your cell phone right after you've stuck your hand in the peanut butter jar? Now peanut butter is smeared all over your phone, and on both hands, from furiously trying to wipe it off (cuz you can't wipe it off with the hand which already has peanut butter on it). I mean, I love peanut butter, but...C'MON!!

Hell, by the time I get off the phone I've got peanut butter on my face, in my hair, on my hands, on my shirt, on my pencil, on my... (well, never mind).

Yeah, yeah, I know...you can get one of those fancy long peanut butter spatulas, but once that's already in the dishwasher then you're hosed. Back to peanut butter all over everything.

Can someone enlighten me on this phenomenon?

Just sayin!

First World Problem, Class A+. Congrats!

Ah, the peanut butter jar, a darkly humorous metaphor for life. The good stuff always seems just out of reach, and the deeper you delve, the messier things become.

Then there's the inevitable phone call, a perfect embodiment of Murphy's Law. The universe, with its twisted sense of timing, ensures that the call arrives precisely when you're wrist-deep in peanut butter.

The peanut butter spatula? A false beacon of hope. You think you've found the solution, only to discover it's languishing in the dishwasher. Life's cruel way of saying, "Not so fast."

And the peanut butter that ends up everywhere? It's the universe's dark comedy. A sticky reminder that life is messy, and no matter how hard you try, you're bound to end up smeared in complications.

So, my friend, the only enlightenment I can offer is this: Life is a jar of peanut butter. It's sticky, it's complicated, and just when you think you've got a handle on it, your phone rings.

I use my cake decorating spatula and before I even think of eating I take it to the sink and wash it. I guess I could stock-pile spatulas so I didn't have to deal with it in the moment.

This is Gods way of telling you not to consume peanut butter. It isn't a fit food for human beings.

originally posted by: Flyingclaydisk
So, help me understand here...why, pray tell, do they make the peanut butter jar so tall that you can't get the peanut butter out of the jar without getting peanut butter all over your hand???

And..why is it that someone always calls you on your cell phone right after you've stuck your hand in the peanut butter jar? Now peanut butter is smeared all over your phone, and on both hands, from furiously trying to wipe it off (cuz you can't wipe it off with the hand which already has peanut butter on it). I mean, I love peanut butter, but...C'MON!!

Hell, by the time I get off the phone I've got peanut butter on my face, in my hair, on my hands, on my shirt, on my pencil, on my... (well, never mind).

Yeah, yeah, I know...you can get one of those fancy long peanut butter spatulas, but once that's already in the dishwasher then you're hosed. Back to peanut butter all over everything.

Can someone enlighten me on this phenomenon?

Just sayin!

originally posted by: LoneWolfMT
...

So, my friend, the only enlightenment I can offer is this: Life is a jar of peanut butter. It's sticky, it's complicated, and just when you think you've got a handle on it, your phone rings.

I love it!! Wisdom from our time! 🤣🤣

And what's more; unlike jam, peanut butter doesn't ever seem to get "un-sticky", so no matter how long it languishes on the side of your computer mouse, or behind your phone, the next time you touch one of these things you've got peanut butter on five other things before you get it under control.

a reply to: nugget1

Ahh, now let's not go getting all psy-entific about things here! That's far too logikal! LOL!

originally posted by: Flyingclaydisk
So, help me understand here...why, pray tell, do they make the peanut butter jar so tall that you can't get the peanut butter out of the jar without getting peanut butter all over your hand???

And..why is it that someone always calls you on your cell phone right after you've stuck your hand in the peanut butter jar? Now peanut butter is smeared all over your phone, and on both hands, from furiously trying to wipe it off (cuz you can't wipe it off with the hand which already has peanut butter on it). I mean, I love peanut butter, but...C'MON!!

Hell, by the time I get off the phone I've got peanut butter on my face, in my hair, on my hands, on my shirt, on my pencil, on my... (well, never mind).

Yeah, yeah, I know...you can get one of those fancy long peanut butter spatulas, but once that's already in the dishwasher then you're hosed. Back to peanut butter all over everything.

Can someone enlighten me on this phenomenon?

Just sayin!

Granted you no doubt lose some as unsqueezable.

a pastry filling bag and nozzle and you can select your particular brand. An ex used to be a pastry chef, make perfect hotdog bun peanut butter sandwiches

originally posted by: tanstaafl
This is Gods way of telling you not to consume peanut butter. It isn't a fit food for human beings.

originally posted by: Flyingclaydisk
So, help me understand here...why, pray tell, do they make the peanut butter jar so tall that you can't get the peanut butter out of the jar without getting peanut butter all over your hand???

And..why is it that someone always calls you on your cell phone right after you've stuck your hand in the peanut butter jar? Now peanut butter is smeared all over your phone, and on both hands, from furiously trying to wipe it off (cuz you can't wipe it off with the hand which already has peanut butter on it). I mean, I love peanut butter, but...C'MON!!

Hell, by the time I get off the phone I've got peanut butter on my face, in my hair, on my hands, on my shirt, on my pencil, on my... (well, never mind).

Yeah, yeah, I know...you can get one of those fancy long peanut butter spatulas, but once that's already in the dishwasher then you're hosed. Back to peanut butter all over everything.

Can someone enlighten me on this phenomenon?

Just sayin!

(Debbie Downer has entered the Chat)

Well, hi there, Debbie! 😁

a reply to: putnam6

I like the "Stress Free" part! LOL!

originally posted by: schuyler
First World Problem, Class A+. Congrats!

So just because some unfortunate child is starving in Ethiopia,

FCD is supposed to be content with peanut butter on his face hand, and cell phone.

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

Well brother? I did see squeeze peanut butter!!🫡✌️

Misleading thread. Was expecting a rant on miniature food, not peanut butter jars. Use a spoon not your hand pro tip.

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

This pales into insignificance when dealing with Marmite Jars.

One day, everything will be injected directly while we watch the advert for it on a screen while strapped to a nearly comfy chair in the nearly dark corner of a nearly square underground bunker..

Oh joy.

Why not invent and sell special cutlery just for these kind of stupid jars designed by spotty university kids with a badge?

Um, hello?

That's what dogs are for. Easy clean up!

Our boxer loves it so much, she can carry it off the counter, into the living room, somehow unscrew the cap, without teeth marks, mind you, and then proceed to eat half the jar.

Because apparently that is as far as her tongue will go. So then she hides the evidence by pushing the jar under the couch.

And never has a sticky face.

Personally, I just use a butter knife.

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

And the corollary is about all the orange marmalade I have on my fingers for the same reason.
Why not make short, squat plastic containers for this?

You are doing it wrong!

when the jar is almost empty:
1, turn off your phone
2, stick your finger in the jar and turn the jar all the way around
3, stick finger in your mouth and enjoy
4, repeat

or
poor some cereal in the jar and stir firmly with a spoon... and enjoy

OR, if you REALLY want a taste of enjoyment:
put a scoop of icecream in the jar

you can also do this with chocopaste btw...

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

Yeah, this happens to me too.

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

In europe, they are just regular jars, i scoop the stuff with a spoon and wash it down with a bit of milk, its like a healthier chocolate snack.

sometimes i break down a banana with a fork and mix a bit of peanut butter in there,.. tasty..

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk
Peanut butter and the large jar of Hellman’s Mayonnaise…always end up with mayo on my knuckles