don't know where else to turn, found some odd stuff on my girlfriends kik messenger.

a reply to: Lucid Lunacy

Well crap, now I gotta uninstall this damn thing.

If you can't trust her enough to stay out of her damn phone you have no business being in a relationship with her. a reply to: dr1234

a reply to: Lysergic

Well crap, now I gotta uninstall this damn thing.

Damn workplace for spreading that bloody rumor about KiK.

Everyone knows people communicate with their genitalia on Snapchat.

This will go over like a lead balloon but, when did it become acceptable or commonplace to think that one has a right or need to know their partner's every thought and/or fantasy? Or why is it necessary to be involved in every form of communication the partner has with whomever it is they choose to communicate with on any platform?

I know folks who constantly text and inquire of their significant other what they are doing at every minute of the day. It's my opinion that not allowing someone room to breathe can help to cause a riff in the relationship because some need time and space for themselves. Because two people are in a relationship they do not have to do every single thing together nor be aware of each other's movements at all times.

I suppose I don't understand the need for control that some adults feel they need to exert over another.

I believe folks are going to do what they are going to do regardless of if you are monitoring their every move and it just seems so desperate to be going through their things, honestly. It speaks to me that you may have had suspicions of unfaithfulness prior and I wonder if that is because of her actions/behaviors or something you brought to the relationship from your past.

I wish you all the luck in the world in finding a peaceful resolution.

a reply to: Lucid Lunacy

They got some great filters for genitalia decoration.

a reply to: seasonal

Trust is the root of this chap's problems.

a reply to: TNMockingbird

Well said!

a reply to: Lysergic

Making my genitalia puke rainbows still seems suggestive though lol

If you do not trust her,why are you with her???

Move on,
If not for you, do it for her. A relationship built on doubt is doomed to failure..

You either want to punish yourself or her.

Move on find a woman you trust...

Respectfully,
~ meathead

originally posted by: dr1234
So this all started several months ago...

You lost my sympathy the moment that you invaded her privacy.
So what if she's bi-, the vast majority of humanity is some degree of 'bi'!
But the vast majority of humanity are not nosy, insecure, snoops...
Now, you got yourself into a sticky wicket!
And you'll NEVER get that mental porn to stop!
All part of the maturation process...

a reply to: dr1234

You obviously have no respect for your GF's privacy. Burn in hell.

Whether she's cheating or not, and if you are not a nutcase, if your questioning the relationship it's time to move on.

Burn in hell.

Quickly is the speed it escalated.

a reply to: dr1234

If it were me, I would Catfish her..
Make a Kik account and peruse an erotic relationship.
If she goes for it, you know that she is cheating.
If she doesn't, delete the app and move on.
Be careful though, you do NOT want to get caught doing this. If you betray her trust, and she hasn't done anything wrong, you might screw yourself out of a relationship.
Good luck

a reply to: o0oTOPCATo0o

From everything we've read he didn't have any legitimate reason to suspect she was cheating, or had interest in cheating, to begin with. So instead of catfishing her, why not have some trust in your lover?...

a reply to: dr1234

You have gotten some very good advice here and I hope you think long and hard about those words of wisdom. I really hope you can put your defensiveness aside and think about what you could have and should have done better. I'm going to speak to you as I would to my own son. It may sound harsh, but it's said with love.

The bottom line is that YOU need to do better. YOU are the problem, not your girlfriend. My heart goes out to her.

Please don't whine about how cheating is so much worse than snooping. That's a copout and you know better. You do not know that your girlfriend is cheating and offered no evidence that she was or is -- Even after snooping. But you do know that you were snooping, pretending to be her, and invading her privacy -- and still found no evidence that she's cheating. You still have no reason to be suspicious of her; but you do know that she cannot trust you.

And please don't whine that she should have no secrets from you and that you should know everything about her. You obviously don't feel she deserves to know everything about you, or you would have already told her what you've done... not telling us what you've done to her and continuing to talk about her behind her back. No secrets, right?

Think about this -- and I say this as gently and respectfully as I can: Are you judging her by your own behavior and standards???

Your best bet is to do what you should have done to begin with if you had any doubts/suspicions: Be a man -- not a sneaky shady little boy -- and actually talk to her! But now, instead of confronting her, you need to confess your own sins and insecurities and beg her forgiveness. If she forgives you, then you're a damn lucky man, and you can build your future relationship on a firmer foundation. If she doesn't forgive you, then take your lumps and learn your lesson, so you can build future relationships on a firmer foundation.

Good luck!

a reply to: dr1234

No. You snooped through her stuff based on a conversation you had with your friends that really had nothing to do with her. That makes you a jerk. It doesn't matter if other jerks agree with you. You weren't respectful towards her or her privacy. You could have simply asked her about it, but instead you decided to take advantage of information, like her passwords, and go behind her back. Go ahead, tell her all about it. I'm quite sure she'll agree with me. Then maybe you can tell her "but a bunch of guys on ATS suggested I set up a threesome."

a reply to: Lucid Lunacy

exactly

a reply to: dr1234

No, he said she has the right to see anyone she wants. For example, when you tell her that you've betrayed her trust she'll have every right to leave you and meet someone who isn't so insecure they'll violate her privacy the first time their friends bring something up. Seriously, are you like 19 or something? If you are, sorry, it's a rough lesson to learn. If you're a grown man, you really should know better.

"Humans cannot be trusted"