Does Unconditional Love Really Exist?

Plotus
Does unconditional love really exist...? Yes it does, but not for everybody. Are you willing to die for someone? That would be the ultimate answer.

Does that depends on it dying is a sacrifice or not. To some dying and leaving this place is easy and staying here is harder. It all depends on if you are comfortable and happy in this place.

The ability to die for someone is not unconditional love when there is no sacrifice. The opposite to live with a being who cause you suffering by selfish need at the cost of yourself is unconditional love.

If it is a sacrifice then you have to be able to die for anybody for it to be unconditional love (no condition to cause you to love them). Your kids or loved one are conditional love since they are connected to you and your love is built up on the experiences you have had with them.

reply to post by Realtruth


IMHO unconditional love between two people is extremely rare. It is an entire different case when talking about animals and their masters/ companions.

BlueMule

reject
reply to post by Realtruth

 

Yes, there are some parents who have that kind of love for their offspring...

Don't get me wrong its a beautiful thing when parents love their children that much.

But unless they love themselves and everyone else that way too its conditional love. The condition is that of being their children.

Unconditional love and forgiveness do exist but as an altered state of consciousness. The knowledge of how it feels to experience unconditional love is state-specific knowledge.

edit on 14-12-2013 by BlueMule because: (no reason given)

now, that's just nuts

I spent two weeks with a woman from Canada, in Canada, 26 years ago, and never spoke to her again except for an unreturned message on social media(I finally found her online 3 months ago!) I would quit my job right now, get my visa, crawl on my hands and knees through broken glass, just to hold her in my arms (clothes on even!) and tell her face to face just one more time how precious she still is to me.

Or maybe it's "unconditional guilt" on my part. Not sure.

reply to post by Realtruth


Well, I have a wife and a mistress so I'm probably not the one to ask because I don't love either one of them.....but I am in love with what they for me. There's no real love out there, it's just infatuation in the beginning, and turns into dependency after years of marriage.

Gozer
I spent two weeks with a woman from Canada, in Canada, 26 years ago, and never spoke to her again except for an unreturned message on social media(I finally found her online 3 months ago!) I would quit my job right now, get my visa, crawl on my hands and knees through broken glass, just to hold her in my arms (clothes on even!) and tell her face to face just one more time how precious she still is to me.

Or maybe it's "unconditional guilt" on my part. Not sure.

That's called being whipped.

Abandoned dog.

Could this be considered unconditional love? ( Aside from them asking for donations ) lol

Many people work as volunteers asking for nothing in return.

reply to post by Illuminawty


Nope, that's called being in the US Navy, meeting my dream girl, and having to go, no matter how much we loved each other, and trying not to torture her or myself anymore with a bunch of worthless letters that could never replace each other.

She'd have been happy to have me stay, had I not had to leave, so she was whipped too, which is what made it so hard to leave her behind! It's great being whipped when the other person is whipped to!

My buddy knew her friend, and he kept in touch with her, and 1 and 3 years later, my girl was still bugging her friend to bug my friend about me, and why I'd never kept in touch, and to call her or write her. So she kept the scab torn off for about 3 years, at least, that I know of, and I kept it torn off for 26. I allowed her to hate me, so she wouldn't go through what I've gone through.

So yeah, I was whipped, but so was she, so nyaaaaaa!

reply to post by Realtruth


Beautiful little doggie. From my point of view that dog is a beautiful being inside even if it's body did not look well externally, because of it's treatment and situation. Glad it is healthier and have someone who takes care of it.

The question about unconditional love depends on how the person defines it:

Will you love as long as the other being is at least neutral towards you and do not hurt you?
Will you love even if the other being is hurting you, even if it have no real intent hurting you?
Will you love even if the other being is hurting you with intent to harm you?
Will you love the being from a distance if it is hurting you?
Will you love no matter what?

This dog is not hard to love this dog for me if it acts like in the video.

Yes, unconditional love, but it can be disappointing when it involves family. Pets never really disappoint me, even when they destroy stuff. I guess I like pets more than people.

No.
Even love as we know it is just a series of chemical reactions and electrical impulses interpreted by the brain. Chocolate can mimic the same effects.
I am not religious but even god sets conditions on love and they're supposed to be the perfect being. Don't baptize the child...it burns for eternity...sounds like a condition to me.
The dog in the above video did not love unconditionally either.
The condition was "they fed and treated the animal".
If someone ever said they loved you unconditionally just ask yourself:

"What if I tried to kill them with a chainsaw?"

I think you'd find out very quickly that love is very conditional.
I understand why people want to think love is "unconditional" but what people want to believe and what actually is are two different animals.

-Peace-

reply to post by Realtruth


The only way to experience unconditional love is to have children. People say they unconditionally love their spouse but that's a load of bull. You can stop loving your spouse but you can never stop loving your kids.

reply to post by BO XIAN


Thanks man.

I was thinking about your point 5/6 the other day coincidentally. Where do you draw the line between stupid death and 'honourable' death? There was a case in Greater London a few years back where some poor soul got stabbed on the top deck of the bus and no one helped him throughout the whole ordeal or even rang the ambulance until the knifeman was gone. This wasn't just a quick stab either but a good part of a minute, after which he casually walked off the bus, which was quite populated and had a significant number of young and 'capable' people on it. The guy on the bus bled out to death.

Was everyone 'smart' there to be silent and not even attempt to draw attention or make a life saving call? Or are they cowards? Ok, fair play you can't expect everyone to have the ability let alone bravery, but several fully grown men who didn't do anything? Their smartness cost a mans life.

You know what, I don't think you can 'quantify' it like that. I think whatever a person does in that moment is simply their true nature. It is not a calculated decision, hence smartness or stupidity cannot be attached to it. Thats why I simply see it as that higher sense of compassion. God knows what causes it.

It just is, despite the fact I hate that statement. And for that, I fear a situation like the above I mentioned with the bus, because I know I will do something. It might be stupid or courageous (what does it matter), but I know I couldn't just sit there. I'm not even trying to act like I'm Rambo, if I see a knife get pulled out in small quarters I'm getting active instantly! These are basics.

I think most people are scared in that scenario, not clever. They just don't know what to do, so they do nothing. But what's the excuse for those who are able and know what they can do, yet don't act?

If they were clever, they would not have sat still in silence as a geeza is going on a knife rampage a few metres away from them? That's a very specific example, though, but your point reminded me of it.

Another similar example, I guess, is that you could have a guy going to fight the good fight for some revolution somewhere, and he goes straight to the frontline with no real equipment, training or combat wits - just a good heart. He will probably die quick. Is he stupid? It seems so. But he died for his principle, for what he believed in. And through that very principle, and through the choices he made - down to the very last moment - his actions may be motivation for others to act fearlessly with good heart. Does that ever make it 'worth it?' - in any grand scheme of things?

If by showing true heart and compassion, even in 'stupid situations', we can raise the compassion of humanity as a whole in general - then I don't think I can judge with words. And I also can't judge those who never act, for they can't, and logically can't even argue against those who can help but choose not to for safety.

But I know which type of human would be more beneficial for the race as a whole - that's for sure. As this type of compassion grows in humanity, division can only shrink, right?

reply to post by DazDaKing


Excellent points, for sure.

THX THX.

Certainly I think that heart motivations matter a ton.

I think in terms of my point 6 above . . . I'm thinking of a really ATTACHMENT DISORDER damaged individual . . . say a very abused son or daughter . . . and they get hooked up with an abusive schmuck a lot like their abusing dad or mom . . . and in a sick kind of addiction dance, they flirt with death repeatedly and eventually take a knife or bullet for the abusive partner . . . because that's as close as they ever got to a loving relationship.

I suppose that on one level there'd still be a measure of selflessness in it and some level of admirable because of that.

On another level it's a tragic happenstance . . . the abusive partner didn't even really appreciate the sacrifice . . . they were too stoned or selfish or whatever.

I certainly don't have all the answers. I just know that some folks throw their lives away while still sleep-walking and calling it life. Others throw their lives away "for someone else" who doesn't really care diddly about the person doing the sacrificing. That's tragic. Pathetic. Dreadful.

I could imagine say God telling me to sacrifice my life for someone who seemed like a real lost cause because God knew that HE would engineer the person's Salvation, turning their life around to redemptive lasting good for the individual and many around him. That could make good sense. The other, not.

imho.

Much appreciate the dialogue.

Blessings,

iamea

symptomoftheuniverse
Unconditional love is something you can lose. You can not win it back. You can hope.

How can you loose something that is unconditional?

There are no conditions attached to it, so how could it be lost?

Are talking about the unconditional love in a relationship with another? if so, then even on the termination of that relationship then the unconditional love would still exist.

if everything loved you unconditionally and you did not know this, then you will have lost unconditional love.

reply to post by DazDaKing


I don't think I spoke to the . . . situation on the bus . . . were they cowards etc.

Yeah . . . cowards. At least those who could have done something and chose the easy way out.

It's interesting, the NT includes a verse or two about cowards being condemned along with a list of other horrifically typical dastardly deliberately evil sinners.

That's always been sobering, to me.

"To the one who knows to do good and does it not, to him, it is sin."

James 4:17

New International Version
If anyone, then, knows the good they ought to do and doesn't do it, it is sin for them.
.

New Living Translation
Remember, it is sin to know what you ought to do and then not do it.
.

English Standard Version
So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin.
.

New American Standard Bible
Therefore, to one who knows the right thing to do and does not do it, to him it is sin.
.

King James Bible
Therefore to him that knoweth to do good, and doeth it not, to him it is sin.

The original meaning of sin was: missing the bull's eye in archery . . . failing at perfection. Thus . . . "All have sinned and come short of the glory of God."

And, if we construe . . . in Biblical fashion or otherwise . . . that UNCONDITIONAL LOVE is the opposite of cowardly sinning . . . then, yeah, the passive . . . men . . . on the bus blew it big time.

I don't know that a lot of decisions in such situations are easy. And I'm sure God takes all factors into consideration.

However, I'm utterly convinced that 2 major questions await our graduation from this life during our LIFE REVIEW with The Lord of all:

1. Were you loving . . . in that situation . . . and that one . . . and that one . . . ?

2. What did you learn . . . in that situation . . . and that one . . . and that one . . . ?

And there's the verse . . . LOVE COVERS A MULTITUDE OF SINS.

And . . . that to Love God wholly and others as our selves & doing unto others as we'd have done unto us . . . covers the law and the prophets.

So the men on the bus blew it. Really blew it . . . whether out of cowardice, fear, passivity, selfishness, whatever.

I think of a lot of single mothers and some single dads . . . over the years . . . they make heroic decisions and take heroic actions relentlessly just in survival, too often. Some of them without complaining, excuses, rationalizations or blaming. There's a lot of love in that.

Anyway . . . FWIW.

reply to post by Realtruth


Life is unconditional love because life allows everything and everyone to be exactly as they are without any judgments. Humans may judge each other, even animals made get angry or happy depending on circumstances, but life just allows all things to be as they are. Not only allows it, but embraces it, since all of us is a part of it (life).

arpgme
reply to post by Realtruth

 

Life is unconditional love because life allows everything and everyone to be exactly as they are without any judgments. Humans may judge each other, even animals made get angry or happy depending on circumstances, but life just allows all things to be as they are. Not only allows it, but embraces it, since all of us is a part of it (life).

Now this is an interesting way to see things.

As always extremely well thought out answer arpgme.

Thanks,

RT

An interesting point is that when an Emperor penguin loses it's baby over the dark winter, it tries to adopt a stray baby penguin. Mothers who lost their babies are so desperate to adopt a child that they fight for it when a stray comes along.

A mothers inherent need to nurture a baby is strong.

If you want to call this 'unconditional love', then that's what it is.

Not sure how to describe it but the phenomenon may be in large part 'biological' in nature.

Love is ALWAYS unconditional.

If you're putting conditions on it, then its not love at all. Its tolerance.

The question should be, "Does love exist?"

About half a year ago, I wouldn't know what to say here.

But now, after realizing the love of my life--someone who makes me better in every respect, someone I'd literally do ANYTHING for, I'm here to tell you.

Yes.

It definitely DOES exist.

Hands. Down.