The odd abilities I cannot understand

reply to post by Ghostx


Ghostx, while I nor most of us can diagnose your behavior, I see what you are saying in your last post. The message I am tryinjg to give, albeit poorly worded because quite frankly eloquence isn't my strong point, is that sometimes the 'why' and 'how' aren't really the important questions, or answers, even though they might be of curious interest. They also may remain unanswered......forever. But if one spends their time trying to comprehend the structure of a sentence, they might miss the whole story.

Originally posted by Ghostx
This is list form.
This is not BS.
These are facts about me that I do not understand.

> Adopted from Texas
> My whole life has included a high amount of financial resources
> I display an ability to be amazing at anything I have put my mind to. If I have only been 50% committed I'm average, and if I'm 80% committed to something I'm usually the best; from academics to sports.
> Ability to disengage from situations, making decisions with limited emotion
> Sleep triggers a "reset" where any emotions, grudges, or negative thoughts disappear and are perceived (the next day) to be "from long ago"
> Ability to see all perspectives in any given situation
> Can intellectually out-debate pretty much anyone (obviously I need to know the topic)
> Everyone seems to want to be around me in person; Online and in texts this does not occur...but in person it's as if people's perception of me changes completely.
> This excuse has been heard from MANY people over the years "You're just __My Name__". My questions about this have yet to be answered. It's just a common excuse that people from all over the world have used to me (I've traveled a lot)
> I am constantly told I will do something great, change the world & be successful (by family, friends, random people)
> Everyone from judges, landlords to random people have shown an excessive care for my wellbeing; Judge voided my bail amount (the whole thing) because i couldn't remember my pin on the spot.
> Been forced to engage in sports & extreme exercise my entire life
> Been punished (no beatings) in ALL cases of me drinking, using drugs, or doing bad things [I've hardly gotten away with anything for more than a week or so]
> Surveillance on all "networked" devices I own/owned for my entire life
> In heat of the moment, I display odd fighting skills that I cannot do on command; I do not remember my fights.
> Direct connection to others as if I know what they're thinking (that's their words)
> Ability to manipulate all people for personal gain
> Ability to see events that directly relate to my life. It seems that when I am about to do something stupid, an event occurs that directly (and obviously) relates to my situation & steers me in the right direction. While engaging in positive activities, events are tailored to encourage me.

My first assessment was Narcissistic Personality Disorder, but on a second glance there are a few odd ones from the list that possibly suggest something strange.

Do you have any unusual or "paranormal" childhood memories?

reply to post by Ghostx


are you autistic?
are you male?

xploder

reply to post by Ghostx


Welcome to the club. Adept at everything I do, yet my own worst enemy for all of the gifts. First and with sincerity, We fail and achieve the fastest, yet achieve higher than many, and fail mostly due to over-inflated sense of worth for our natural skills.. Don't get too impressed with yourself, the mojo we have is re-creatable amongst many but not the majority. Temper your advantage with humbleness. Talking good game, and having great (almost magic) luck, skill, prowess, ability to influence others, really is only temporary, this is a long term life, and brilliance often is in short bursts of epic.

I will warn you of your greatest downfalls now, longevity of purpose, and inability to stay focused. We tend to goto problem solution quickly, but will utterly fail in delivering a long-term dedicated action. Yes, we are ridiculously psychic, yes we do Bruce Lee stuff, yes we read minds and hearts, yes we influence others to action, or healing, but, but, but, you will lose, if you think your poop don't stink, as it were. Become patient, sit in silence, build goals which seem contrary to your rapid thought & body nature, and you will achieve true mastery. A less intelligent, and "capable" person than you will outshine you, in the style of the tortoise and the hare, 100% guaranteed for we are the hares, embrace the tortoise fellow hare, and the real Master will shine Within you.

-MatthewGraybeal
P.S. I have only read 1/2 of page one of this, before I opted to add any commentary, please with humble request, follow my advice as you will grow much larger in perspective as a wise-person with this as a tortoise with a hares engine. Patience and long-term insights are your ally. Thinking you are too fabulous, will cause you to self-destruct, as fabulous as we are, above many, We have a silly weakness, patience...

Matthew, that by far is one of the best replies I have seen in this thread.
Wow.
I can relate to the whole hyperactive, short-term goal references you make. I often find my interests changing, and finding myself in an intense focus that produces things much better than anyone else; but like you say, they are hares and they win in the end.

One of my biggest goals in the last six months or so is trying to stick with something for a long period of time.
Another problem I have is fully valuing others. While I am social, have a lot of friends, and have had a bunch of girlfriends, I have stopped 'loving' those people. I find it easy to leave them, as if they are cards in the deck. I can lose those cards easily, knowing that even though there are only 52 cards in a deck, there are millions of decks elsewhere.

Xploder, I have been misdiagnosed with a few things over the years
Bipolar, ADHD, and Borderline personality disorder
I have been told numerous times that therapists and psychiatrists cannot seem to figure anything out and are "run around in circles" by me. A constant piece of feedback is that I am inconsistent and they can never figure out what I am all about.
Those disorders listed above were from a younger age. ADHD was in the "let's give them all ritelin" phase of the 90s. BPD was not actually a full diagnosis, simply a side-thought by a psychiatrist. Bipolar was about 6 years ago, but was later understood to not be valid.

Yes, I am a male and 19 years old.

BrandonD,
the only paranormal things are:
> Observed talking to "an old man by the tree" by a babysitter who was not noticed or seen by her. This occurred on two separate occasions, years apart - I have no recollection of this.
> Observed saying "Hey Grandma" to the ceiling. My grandma was dead, but apparently I told my mom "No she's right there". - No recollection of this.
> Many nightmares resulting in waking up screaming, crying and scared to go to sleep. These were not just normal nightmares. I don't remember what they were, but I know that they had something to do with being trapped or chased and that I was the most scared I have ever been in my life.
> I remember wishing for a second dinosaur toy in Kindergarten. I only had one, and did not steal any, but when I got home I opened my bag to find two in there.
> My friend was reported dead by his family, our shared therapist & several others. I have a tattoo in memory of him, but I found out that he is alive and in prison; I found out about this about a year after his 'death'. More info in this thread

> More unusual things about me can be seen in my thread when I was studying the possibility of being a Monarch or MKULTRA child (in this thread)

Dear OP,
you have been blessed with such a sensational perception of yourself to serve as a cushion between what you know you really are and your fantasies of who you are with comic book character abilities. Or maybe you were sodomised repeatedly by rich white men while hooked up to a machine that funneled kung fu and the worlds knowledge directly into your little toddler brain in order for you to take Matt Damons place, only you will know when. There's only one other possibility....Perhaps you are an ALIEN HYBRID. Or JESUS.

Either way you've totally won me over with your awesome post about how awesome you and your life is. I soo believe in your intellectual superiority as well. Teach me something amazing!!! PLEASE!?

Originally posted by LizardSlicks
Dear OP,
you have been blessed with such a sensational perception of yourself to serve as a cushion between what you know you really are and your fantasies of who you are with comic book character abilities. Or maybe you were sodomised repeatedly by rich white men while hooked up to a machine that funneled kung fu and the worlds knowledge directly into your little toddler brain in order for you to take Matt Damons place, only you will know when. There's only one other possibility....Perhaps you are an ALIEN HYBRID. Or JESUS.

Either way you've totally won me over with your awesome post about how awesome you and your life is. I soo believe in your intellectual superiority as well. Teach me something amazing!!! PLEASE!?

From your post I learned that you lack the simple ability to post something relevant to a thread, and deserve no more comments than that.

reply to post by Ghostx


I apologize for not keeping to the topic of your thread which is obviously to accentuate all the ways in which you are great.

Could it be that a reply with the purpose of putting your little delusions into perspective is actually relevent to a pointless list of vague, unproven "abilities" ?

What exactly do you know about your biological family?

It sounds like you might be able to find your answers there.

Yes I've met my birth mom, my three sisters, aunts & uncles and some cousins.
My birth dad died by gunshot in 2001.
Grandfather killed in shooting.
Grandma in prison for murdering & assisting in the rape of a student from Baylor University
Birth mom's in an institute for doing drugs, drinking, being manic and being a bit nuts
Sisters are doing well, but random drug&alcohol use
Cousin is in military, following the path of his father (both still alive)
We descend from Germans, back in the day
Mostly it's all military history in the family
I guess someone on my dad's side was some famous gunman (outlaw) in Texas, but I can't remember the guys name right now

That's all I really know, or can think of as being somewhat relevant right now

reply to post by Ghostx


I wasnt sure initially there were some similarities in our paths.. I dont know how to explain it other than it was like a code or a messge that got embedded into me, that i woke up one day and started working out, trained hard and unusually.. The methods i used were not traditional. 2 weeks into my training, I inertly developed a new fighting style that exploded from within my core to my fists and feet.. I too felt we could relate on the ability to disengage ourselves emotionally from any situation.. even at gunpoint.. or so iv hypothesized.

I know a little bit about whats been going on to us.. id love to hear your story out, on how it all began! And then i will tell you mine. Its a personal matter no doubt so id prefer we connect via email. Cheers

Originally posted by KingKhan
reply to post by Ghostx

 

I know a little bit about whats been going on to us.. id love to hear your story out, on how it all began! And then i will tell you mine. Its a personal matter no doubt so id prefer we connect via email. Cheers

I have messaged you (ATS calls this 'U2U') with my email. Email me there.
Anyways, King - I am definitely interested in telling you my story and hearing about you.

Since reading through your replies, reading about psychopathy & being honest with myself...I have to admit that there ARE a ton of goddarn similarities...

Originally posted by Ghostx
It seems that when I am about to do something stupid, an event occurs that directly (and obviously) relates to my situation & steers me in the right direction.

So, if this is true, then how is it that you succeeded in posting this thread without your hard drive seizing up to protect you from yourself?



I mean, seriously....

Originally posted by Ghostx

For ex: My dad and me were discussing gun control.
Instead of making the points myself I pretended to be curious (but no knowledgable) regarding the downfall of the US economy.
I had him make the points (that I would make myself) through his own words, then related it to our current situation with gun control; Obviously this went in the direction I wanted to it, but it was easy for me to manipulate him into actually supporting the cause when he previously was totally in agreement with gun control.
He still is 'for' the ban, but I was able to open his mind by allowing him to think he came up with stuff on his own.

That is just one form of manipulation, but it's naturalness scares me.
lying is quite easy.
I often think "this can be good, but if I was on the other side I may be the worst person the world would see." Maybe that's conceited and exaggerated, but I think it's just another display of how there are polar opposites & that's what leads me to my desire to understand myself more.

I'm not sure if this example rises to actual manipulation. I spent 30 years in the music industry and I've been in the presence of true land sharks, and with nothing of consequence dangling in the balance, getting your dad to not argue with you over political ideology for the span of one conversation isn't what anyone I've ever known would consider to be scary levels of manipulation. After all, by your own account, he's still for the ban, so you didn't change his view concerning gun control.

It's hard for some folks to begin to realize that they have a mind and that all minds have an impact on the minds of other people. The difference between you and most folks is that you seem fixated on whatever degree of impact you may or may not have upon the people you come in contact with.

Originally posted by Ghostx

I am a male and 19 years old.

ding! ding! ding!

I think we've found our answer to what the fundamental disorder is here. Thankfully, it's a temporary malfunction and you'll likely grow out of it.





My work is done here.

Originally posted by Ghostx

Originally posted by KingKhan
reply to post by Ghostx

 

I know a little bit about whats been going on to us.. id love to hear your story out, on how it all began! And then i will tell you mine. Its a personal matter no doubt so id prefer we connect via email. Cheers

I have messaged you (ATS calls this 'U2U') with my email. Email me there.
Anyways, King - I am definitely interested in telling you my story and hearing about you.

Since reading through your replies, reading about psychopathy & being honest with myself...I have to admit that there ARE a ton of goddarn similarities...

Really I doubt you are a psychopath, stop diagnosing yourself - you just sound like a young kid who is too full of himself, brimming with ego.

A 19 year old full of existential angst, preoccupied with yourself. It is oddly normal. Most teenagers are like this or many are.

You will grow out of it and realise that you are not special, you are just you. Either we are all special or none of us are IMO.

The more you know the less you realise you know and that includes pondering about yourself in self indulgent ways.

Peace.

If all these tragic things have happened to the OP... then would he be doing this purely to escape reality?

Originally posted by NorEaster

Originally posted by Ghostx

I am a male and 19 years old.

ding! ding! ding!

I think we've found our answer to what the fundamental disorder is here. Thankfully, it's a temporary malfunction and you'll likely grow out of it.

My work is done here.

edit on 2/2/2013 by NorEaster because: (no reason given)

^this made me

Originally posted by HelenConway


A 19 year old full of existential angst, preoccupied with yourself. It is oddly normal. Most teenagers are like this or many are.

You will grow out of it and realise that you are not special, you are just you. Either we are all special or none of us are IMO.

The more you know the less you realise you know and that includes pondering about yourself in self indulgent ways.

Peace.

^ I agree with you 100%

Originally posted by NorEaster

Originally posted by Ghostx

I am a male and 19 years old.

ding! ding! ding!

I think we've found our answer to what the fundamental disorder is here. Thankfully, it's a temporary malfunction and you'll likely grow out of it.

My work is done here.

edit on 2/2/2013 by NorEaster because: (no reason given)

Really, this is it. I'm not saying this to be hurtful or argumentative but you're 19, that alone means there's nothing interesting or special about you. You might be kind of a screwed up kid mentally but really that's about it. You're not an MKULTRA slave. You may have a personality disorder growing on your psyche. Best advice I can give you is get your head out of your ass.