Careful GhostX,

Don't get into the love me when I'm gone, game.

It serves no really good happenstance, for those who need your experience.

If that means anything. I am abstract, I know.

Never feel on the spot in these moments, don't run.

Cirque.

Perhaps 'unwilled' telepathy occurs, but I certainly have never tried to communicate with someone on purpose and succeeded.

I've noticed this though...
Note: In both scenarios my physical expressions & look is the same.
Redaction: Aura theory DOES apply to online presence, but only in this following scenario.

I'm in a bad mood: People escape phone calls, in-person interactions & online messages
I'm in a great mood: People call me, want to hang with me & contact me online frequently.

There seems to be a direct correlation between my personal feelings and my approachability both offline and online.
Reason for redaction: I originally was thinking about the aura effect regarding personal connection with others. However, I've realized that the aura effect DOES apply to who desires speaking with me.


My curiosity into the matter is based on simply that; curiosity. I want to understand.
I have tried to use these abilities, but without notable success. My talents such as doing well when I dedicate myself to something are obviously visible, but I am more interested in the psychological / aura aspect of myself right now.

I believe that we all have auras, or bubbles of consciousness that surround us. I believe I have a heightened awareness of these auras. However, I am not conscious of that awareness; the awareness is somewhere deep in my mind and that awareness trickles down my many thoughts and into my conscious mind. When it has reached my conscious mind I am not aware that my reaction to the other person's aura is coming directly from them. I can't say "I know what they are thinking." Yet I will then speak and it's as if I DID know what they were thinking.

As far as conscious reading (reading signs, etc) goes, I think I am pretty talented at that, but the aura effect is a major factor in that. And so it makes sense to try to understand it better/control it.

Originally posted by Ghostx

Originally posted by Wandering Scribe
Narco,
I've written 5 Operas, 4 plays,

edit on 26-1-2013 by Ghostx because: Added Narco's abbreviated name so the last message makes sense

But...are they good?...and I believe I said "critically acclaimed rock opera"

Originally posted by Ghostx
This is simply a place where I am hoping to find someone else that has experienced these types of things.

I'm finding it more difficult to believe that you didn't come here to boast, as you claim. Are you really expecting to find someone here on ATS who has written 5 operas and 4 plays that are critically renowned...and to tell you why you are successful?

Originally posted by Ghostx
I display an ability to be amazing at anything

I see an incredible amount of narcissism and nothing more.

Originally posted by NarcolepticBuddha

Originally posted by Ghostx

Originally posted by Wandering Scribe
Narco,
I've written 5 Operas, 4 plays,

edit on 26-1-2013 by Ghostx because: Added Narco's abbreviated name so the last message makes sense

But...are they good?...and I believe I said "critically acclaimed rock opera"

Originally posted by Ghostx
This is simply a place where I am hoping to find someone else that has experienced these types of things.

I'm finding it more difficult to believe that you didn't come here to boast, as you claim. Are you really expecting to find someone here on ATS who has written 5 operas and 4 plays that are critically renowned...and to tell you why you are successful?

edit on 27-1-2013 by NarcolepticBuddha because: (no reason given)

I'm hoping you're intelligent enough to realize I obviously haven't written an opera in my life!
Have you written an opera kind sir? or ma'am? perhaps...

Anyways, I'm going to let this thread sit until I get some more replies.

Originally posted by Ghostx
This is list form.
This is not BS.
These are facts about me that I do not understand.

The most informative fact is the fact that you decided to post this info on ATS.

If I had to guess I'd say that you have Narcissistic Personality Disorder. You should look into it and see if it applies.

It's called ego...possibly a bit of delusions of grandeur.

I wouldn't call it so much of an "ability"...more of a flaw that you should work on.

I believe you are suffering from something called the "ego".
No worries though, we all have it, and it's something that can be fixed. But from a medical perspective, you might want to check out Narcissistic personality disorder. Some symptoms are....

- Appearing unemotional
- Lacking empathy and disregarding the feelings of others
- Requiring constant attention and positive reinforcement from others
- Exaggerating own importance, achievements, and talents
and.....
- Being obsessed with self

And oh yeah, this is probably a less serious diagnosis. It could be Psychopathy as mentioned above.

Fortunate or unfortunate, it appears you might want to change your outlook. You acclaim all these fortunate traits, characteristics and situations, yet it’s still all about you. You even have the finances to make a difference in other people’s lives, in the world. Maybe you could get off the ‘me’rry go-round and get your hands dirty in the filth of human suffering. The rewards can be immeasurable. Instead of being a feather in the wind, be the wind.

Good luck on your search.

Hey brad, seen limitless?

ALS

Just a few quotes:

Money has been earned from jobs ranging from Lifeguard to drug dealer.

I have accomplished nothing noteworthy at this point in time.

Judge voided my bail amount

With all the advantages you cite you have, you turned to drug dealing to pick up some pin money???? I just find it sad that someone with so many positive physical and mental attributes dropped into a plentiful environment would accomplish so little. It seems a waste to me when so many people struggle for just a pittance of what you have been given through no effort of your own. You are in the 1% and rather than do good you appear to be wasting it. You've never had to work hard for anything, so you don't appreciate anything either.

Do you understand the word "character"? I don't say this from a position on high. I had to learn what that meant the hard way myself. "Character" has to do with "doing the right thing" with the talents you have, with taking a moral high road with reference to manipulating people, with sometimes sacrificing yourself to benefit others. You show none of this.

What you are doing on this thread is what others would do behind their closed bedroom door, embarrassed that someone else might witness it. It makes you a laughingstock, really. You ought to be ashamed.

Originally posted by winofiend

Originally posted by Ghostx
This is list form.
This is not BS.
These are facts about me that I do not understand.

And all of this before you even reached age 18.

Judge voided my bail amount

Still, can't avoid courts though.

What's it like being so amazing?

I can only dream...

but you are amazing winofiend.
i have read your posts.


OP if what you relate is true, escape now from everyone involved.
you do not get to the upper echelons of society unless you are corrupt, and it seems
to me that you have been groomed with all this attention and protection and mental
manipulating for no good reasons.

choose wisely. you might gain the world and not be able to look yourself in
the eye or sleep with any peace.

you don't miss these things 'til you lose them.

While many of the things y'all state match up with me (ego, narcissist, etc) I do not think I have those disorders.

Here is my list of replies to all of you.
> I have wealth, but turned to drug dealing as my parent's wealth came in the form of travel and opportunity, education, etc not just random cash.

> I have done community service for years in the US, but also in Kenya and India. Gridrebel, I have a lot of opportunities, but ride my bike to work each day. You won't see me wearing high end clothing or appearing as 'rich'. I fit in more with the poor than the rich to be honest. That said, there's always more I can do.

> Shuyler, I think you put a lot of emphasis on not working for anything. I currently work a full time job, pay my own rent, pay for my own food, water, electricity, cable, internet, and everything I have. I cut myself off completely from my parents (financially) except for my phone bill as it is packaged in with them.

> k1k1to, while I admit I have done nothing 'grand', I disagree with you. There are plenty of people that do a TON of great things, but are not decaying meat. Your generalization of people that don't do something that benefits you directly is quite harsh and honestly comes with the intelligence of a rotating sock full of disintegrating lamb.

> It is sad that you all turn to the talk of egos and disorders based on a list. You all assume that my list is based on opinion and not fact.
If I said "the apple is always red"
the most logical response is: "yes, the apple is red"
but instead, page 2 of this thread has been filled with: "that apple is green, and you are color blind because you think it is red."

While you may be right, perhaps I am color blind (the metaphor for me being egotistical, narcissistic, etc) - It is rather foolish to come to that conclusion when you all truly have only seen a list, and some replies.
That said, thank you for your opinion - I was looking for personal relations, and you all have attempted to offer a conclusion. This is about the search that comes with a personal conclusion LATER, not about matching my traits with a list of traits from Wikipedia or other sites.
Thanks though!

I'm glad you posted this.

If you take away the financial aspects of your life, it seems we have the same attributes.

These characteristics are common, which is why I think you're getting so much slack from people here. However, I understand where you're coming from. I'm guessing you also don't see these attributes in anyone you've ever encountered either.

In my early 20's I actually wrote something in my notebook that was VERY much like your first post. It listed the qualities I found within myself and I was trying to put them together to figure out why I had them. I don't believe it's egotistical or narcissistic. Especially when you've met millions of people who don't seem to have a single attribute that is similar. At that point, you start questioning, "How is it I can see this and they can't?".

I never cared about sports, but I'm a musician and have always said about myself that I'm a jack of all trades, master of nothing. I can play every instrument you put in my hands. I may not be a virtuoso with all of them, but I guarantee I can create a melody with whatever it is.

What was really mind blowing to me was reading back over that 10 year old notebook and realizing that I was writing about stuff that I hadn't even ventured into yet. The notebook is filled with passages that could be taken right out of Ernest Holmes 'Science Of Mind' (which, if you haven't already, I STRONGLY suggest you check it out), but it was 4 years before I even knew of that books existence/content that I was writing about the my ability to control emotions, see someone across the room and know exactly what they were feeling, putting pieces together, etc.

Something I find odd now, especially after reading that notebook and seeing how excited I was about the way I was using my mind, is that I fell into a serious abyss of alcohol abuse that disconnected me from any of those abilities for years. It happened quickly too. You could tell from reading those pages that I was bursting with excitement for my future and in less than a year I was drunk/hungover 6-7 days a week.

The drinking is all over with now, but I feel it did significant damage to the thought process I had when I was 20-21. It slowed my pace of self-discovery down considerably, actually, it straight up halted it for years. Now there's a tinge of questioning as where before it was straight up obvious to me.

It's really interesting to think about, the 'why me' aspect of it. I know it's taken up a lot of my own time and has certainly lent itself to a bit of egotism at times when I wasn't careful. I think it's more useful to put these attributes towards an actual goal or way of life than sitting back thinking of why we have them. However, knowing why could become the groundwork for the plan of action.

You're not alone, brother. I *know* what you're saying in your original post.

Edit- I've been working on a concept album (or rock opera, as some call it) for the past 10 years. Kind of funny that got brought up in this thread....