Soltari, my brother. at the beginning of this year I was in the deepests transformative depression I have ever been in. I was just damn unhappy with
my whole game, and it was bothering me on a deep soul level. Instead of crawlin into a bottle and feeling sorry for myself, I meditated through it. I
asked my higher self to help me find the motivations for my depression and they were all crap.
Then I felt the first stirrings of the kundalini in my back. Still my lower self was yammering all these depressive thoughts into my head. Then one
day driving I had my mind blown by it, and I also found myself in a place of peace love and joy, that was very unusual for me. I strived to keep that,
and it has stuck with me now for three and a half months, and has changed my life again for the better.
Two things, you are getting a huge boost in life by starting meditation early, and it shows you are doing well at it that you are having awakening
experiences allready. I would give anything to have gotten started on this when I was younger. Look for online books by Robert bruce on Energy Work to
augment your meditations. You don't have to still your mind, just guide it in the right direction. I usually still my mind with chakra meditation,
and then go into deep meditation where I go on shamanic journeys and do deep healing work.
I rarely manage to "still" my very active mind. The best thing I can do is guide it into serene places, but in doing this I have achieved some
incredible meditations, and they just get better and better all the time as my mind gets better at keeping track of the creation of my inner world.
Balancing your chakras sounds like am mouthfull. It is really a simple matter of visualizing them and breeding familiarity with them. Don't focus on
one chakra too much, but instead make sure you cover them all in your meditations. The colors of the rainbow correspond, that makes it easier to
remember as you go through them.
Second thing. There is not only a higher self. There is the conscious self and the lower self. You have come onto a powerful tool to help you through
hard times. The Huna have a way of communicating with the higher and lower selves throught he use of a pendulum. Once you practice this a little bit
it turns bizarre as hell. You can get good answers to difficult questionswith a pendulum. Google Huna, Pendulum you should get some good results, if
you don't find what you need you can also feel free to pm me for more meditation help.
Peace and love, and welcome to the lighter side of life.