Okay folks, I've been thinking about doing this thread for a while, so now I am gonna do it
All of us that served in our country's militaries all have some story of something that was extremely funny, be it in basic advanced training or
while on active duty. I have a ferw I wanna share, and all you vets and active duty servicepersons please share yours as well.
Rules for the thread: NO MILITARY BASHING!!!!! Bash elsewhere, any bashing will be IMMEDIATELY notified and action taken. DO NOT SCREW UP MY
Okay, I arrived at Reception at Ft Jackson around 1 or 2 am, and immediately taken to a large room where you immediately start filling out all the
paperwork that will follow you thru your military service, and get the start of the MANY briefings you will get in basic by the Drill Sgts.
Being this was in the 1990's, the US Army was an all volunteer army, no draftees since the early 1970's. Irreguardless, the drill sgts still ask us
recruits were any of us forced to enlist, did anyone put a gun to our head and make us enlist. I raised my hand and saud, my mom and dad forced me to
enlist. You know they say dont make a name for yourself in basic, stay under the radar, needless to say, I didnt...
Fast forward to AIT, Ft Lee, VA. The dorms there are 4 men to a room. It was me and 3 others, my 'batt'e buddy' was this geeky we all called
Beeker, due to his resemblance to the muppet Beeker (tentativeequinox.files.wordpress.com...
) had Beeker had a crewcut and
joined the Army. This guy was a COMPLETE screwup, and since everything was teamwork in the military, when one person screwed up, EVERYONE in the room
paid the price. needless to say,. this guy had ATFU (if youre military, you know what that means) written across his forehead, he never had his locker
squared away, never did his bed correctly and threw tantrums every time we tried to correct him. One day, after training, we're in our room, the 4 of
us, so Beeker decided to take a shower, so he took his hygene items, locked his locker, stuck his keys under his pillow and hit the showers. I looked
at my other 2 roommates and grinned. I grabbed my Polaroid, unlocked his locker, climbed INSIDE and had one of bthe other guys lock me in. About 5
minutes later, Beeker comes back, unlocks his locker, I jump out yelling, and snapping polaroids. This guy damn near WET himself and screamed like a
girl. The pics I got were him with this INTENSE look of terror on his face (I gotta find those pics to scan). So he starts yelling at me while the 3
of us are laughing so hard we cant breathe. Oiur Drill Sgt comes into the room to see what was going on. as Beeker explained and he saw the pics, you
can tell he was trying not to laugh while chewing me out, after he walked out, you can hear him laughing on his way down the hall.
Fast forward to my first duty station, Ft Wainwright, Alaska. its late spring, and about 2 AM. Something woke me up out of a sound sleep. As I lay
there, I hear a slight noise, coming from the room next door to me in the barracks. As I listen the noise got louder, then realized what it was: my
next door neighbor had brought someone to his room, and the sounds were coming from her! They got so loud to the point I hear doors opening up and
down the hallway and other sleeping soldiers poking their heads out. I then informed them that it was from the room next to mine. Being in Army
barracks, you werent SUPPOSED to have overnight visitors, we knew eventually they'd have to leave, the dozen or so of us that were woken up,
positioned ourselves by the ONLY door out, and we sat there, drinking beer and making lewd jokes about my neighbor. About an hour later, the door
opened and they both stepped out. As she stepped into the hallway and saw us, we all stood up and applauded, hooted & hollared, pretty much being
juveniles. She ducked back into the room, and after about 10 mins of coaxing, my neighbor got her to leave with him, her face was bright red and kept
looking down, not able to look at ANY of us.
As my name here is Homer, it was my nickname in the Army, how I got it, I am not too sure, but it was meant to be my nickname, because eventually
EVERYONE knew me as Homer. One day, during an awards ceremony, I was receiving my second Army Achievement Medal, and our XO was reading the citation,
and as we were pinned, he would read off the names. When he got to me, instead of saying Specialist Joseph , he said Specialist Homer . Everyone,
INCLUDING the CO laughed. The XO was like what? The CO had to explain it was my nickname, not my real name!
Okay anyone else wanna pick up with their tales?