Domestic Violence Lobbyist Shoots & Kills Husband

Well, the article is somewhat weighted. In fact it's a terrible article, but it's content is worthy of consideration.

If you are a man getting abused and you call the cops, you as the man will automatically be the suspected abuser. The police are not going to believe that a man is on the receiving end of abuse.

If a man tells anyone he's being abused by his partner, that man will be suspected by the person they are speaking to as being the actual abuser.

In general, men who are being abused feel they cannot come forward and that's somewhat justified.

In the end, the best option for a man being subjected to abuse is leaving. And I would advise disappearing so as to cut all contact, it's best for you and her. Change cell number, keep your new place of residence a secrete. Also keep in mind that if she can't get to you, she may go after something or somebody you care about, so if you're ex knows where some of your family members live, make sure they know to watch out for their own safety, in case your ex really flips and tries to burn down your parent's house or run down your sibling or something similar for revenge.

Get out, lay low and let time heal (you and your ex). 'Lay low' time and some time on your own will also give your brain a chance to learn from your experience.

www.primitivism.com...

Most people do not see, understand, or care very much about this catastrophe of the planet because they are overwhelmingly preoccupied with grave psychological problems. The environmental crisis is rooted in the psychological crisis of the modern individual.

reply to post by silent thunder


It may go way beyond hypocrisy here. She may have seen the approach as fair play then. Cant get them to change give them some of thier own medicine.

Great point about the gray areas, ambiguity, stability. Same can be said for for those that do not insist that every human in thier lives be the same in all things....interaction, responce, you name it.

reply to post by Recouper


Any man in such a situation should do one of two things.

1. Provoke his partner very carefully before going out to see friends and hope that during the night she'll betray her usual self control and attack you infront of them. This is how someone i know did it, then after she was chucked out he told them all about it and they believed him after seeing her go nuts. Abusers are very careful to appear all nice and mild mannered to everyone outside of the relationship. Of course this can backfire if the abuser is good at keeping control.

2. Record an incident. With modern equipment it is very easy to get a small camera, or just have your phone on record and leave it on a table somewhere.

Originally posted by Dark Ghost
I know we shouldn't play the blame game, but I cannot help but feel that this is somehow Feminism's fault. Unable to use the previously sizable Domestic Violence quotas as a political tool to demonise men must be frustrating. Combine that with the fact that women are losing their "oppressed minority" status...well that's some intense Oestrogen-charged hatred right there!

Yes lot of "equality" never transfered over durring the hay day. Many women understood that they could go out in the world and make hay while the man was supposed to spend his living on holding the fort down while the lady partied. Now days some women have done well, better than hubby but whine about having to shoulder traditional male head breadwinner roles.

As well men that have had to take on traitional female roles are often looked down on and are held in contempt as someone getting over whiel thier wife "has to" to out and work.

Woman wanted equality....some men took them out to the plow and horse and put the harness on them and said have at it I am going in to make a quilt.

But toher men and women have made the most of this and have done well or what they must.

reply to post by spikey


Men have it quite a lot worse than most modern women realise. The difference is that men tend to keep their troubles to themselves. Whereas women tend to...well, what's the opposite of not keeping it to yourself?

And I will point out that Domestic Abuse is not only the physical kind; emotional abuse can rather detrimental as well. But the image of a strong, overpowering male man-handling a weak defenceless female is much more powerful than an emotionally abusive female ripping apart an emotionally weaker man's self esteem. Unsurprisingly, you hear much more about the former than the latter...

[edit on 19/7/2010 by Dark Ghost]

reply to post by pai mei


From the article you linked to:

"Ontogeny recapitulates phylogeny"

That is a fact.

I wonder, is the general apparent madness in today's world a problem with ignorance of this fact? As time has progressed, society has "improved" the procedures employed upon developing youths and young people are now often pushed off their developmental path. So when they are full grown, their development has not kept pace with their age and they must deal with the world and their personal relationships as under developed beings.
When we see a woman hunt down and kill her ex-partner, are we seeing the actions of a woman how has grown in body and skill set, but not in mind and spirit?


Edited to fix mangled sentence.

[edit on 19/7/2010 by Recouper]

This only reinforces my belief that feminism is a cancer on society. As is, of course, masculinism or whatever the male version of it would be. Both only serve to divide us. Which is why we should talk about humanism, not feminism.

My mom once said when she retires, she want to work with women's rights issues. I asked her why not human rights issues?

Of course, she pretended she didn't hear my question.


And I hope that lady is thrown in the dungeons for this.

[edit on 19-7-2010 by David_Reale]

Originally posted by XPLodER
another law makes it easyer for woman to get large benifits if they seperate from the father

there are many more laws in my country that force men into a corner a poke them with a stick

i dont blame the women for this

i blame the politicians whos motive is devide and concour

break up the family unit and make the woman dependant on the state

What this has done is allow certain women.. female cads, unstable, unfaithfull, mean, hatefull, lesbions and other "celebrators of woman" to avail themselves behind the cover of law to a male slave and/or a ward of the system. For every one woman that really may need these laws there are 5 or so just milking it.

Thanks Opra!

Originally posted by David_Reale
This only reinforces my belief that feminism is a cancer on society. As is, of course, masculinism or whatever the male version of it would be. Both only serve to divide us. Which is why we should talk about humanism, not feminism.

Feminism should have its moment in the spotlight alone considering the way it forced its self onto society as an answer to things, a new "freedom" for woman kind. Yes it has earned the attention. Its just sad to me that the moment has passed that this issue should have been addressed. Its just reflection now.....lots of male victims out there durring the "purge" that were just told to shut up because they were brainwashed products of a male dominated mind set that had to be "broken" and all that came out of thier mouth reflected this brainwashing.

And really we have heard enough about the male version. Really 30 years of it...male bashing...male roles...male this and that.

So by all means let the ladies have thier moment on the stage. Thanks Oprah!

[edit on 19-7-2010 by Logarock]

reply to post by Dark Ghost


Yes there are regular reports of a husband suddenly beating his wife and it appears she has hen pecked him for years and years and he finally snapped. However when he snaps he is imprisoned, when women snap then it's the guys fault for being a nasty individual. The double standards are common place.

This doesn't excuse domestic abuse of course but i disagree with something a member here said. They said the door is always there and to say that suggests they don't know the psychology of an abuse victim. When victims snap it's a very sudden thing, there is no logical decision made it's a mixture of rage and panic after years of continual abuse and they see murder as the only way out. The abuser has built a cage and so simply walking out the door isn't enough because they know the abuser is always there, it's the very existence of the abuser which becomes the cage.

This woman however doesn't seem to have been abused, she appears to have just not liked the idea that he was leaving her and as she has had multiple marriages it suggests there is something not quite right with her from the start.

However an important point needs to be made more public and that is the men who are falsly acccused of domestic violence. If a woman is beating a man and the police are called then she can simply turn around and say she was defending herself and the police will believe her. The type of woman who can beat her husband is the same type who will happily lie to the police and get the guy imprisoned because it teaches him a lesson, there is no escape.

Yet if this point is raised many domestic abuse campaingers think it will scare women from reporting abuse in case they are not believed. Well isn't this rather one sided? Isn't that simply saying "well we need women protected and if some men have to suffer then so be it, we can't risk the women staying silent".

Abusers both the male and female kind show some serious sociopathetic traits. They like the feeling of control and power over another and will do anything to maintain it. Their ultimate goal is of course to have a willing victim and sadly the feminist movement, along with the domestic violence campaigners have both been hijacked by some really rather nasty women who fit the mold of an abuser quite well. Oh there are still plenty of good men and women within such movements but they seem to be an increasing minority.

It had to happen , this whole femme fatale thing is getting scary , im in a relationship now , but i know if it fails , im hiding out for a long time ,
cause im scared to death of my missus! ,
And i will never court a women again , and i will pay for sex if i have too , im serious as jones about that , Right or wrong ,i can only speak from experience ,
Ive always been a relationship man since my highschool days , dont get me wrong , im happy , but life doesnt promise you nudda ,and if this relationship goes belly up , im gonna die a single , solo man

pls god if its gonna end , id rather sooner(30 yrs) than later like when im 50yrs old , Being in a break up after 50 would be harder then lets say 30-40 ....

Maybe she had spent her time surrounded by cases of domestic violence and, like a self-fulfilling prophecy, it (the act of domestic violence) somehow worked its way into her body...

Then it needs to be considered if she has a history of mental illness. If she has sufferred from mania, schizophrenia or another mind/body splitting illness then this could quite easily have happened. Her familiarity with domestic violence infiltrated her uncontrolled sub-consciouss led state of mania.

Or yeah, she could just be a cold, psychopath who thinks nothing of gunning down a man in the street

Here is a cat for you pidgeons to play with

I'm an abused husband. Wifey has physically assaulted me a few times in our marriage (3/4 times in an 11 year marriage).

She was abused as a child, physically, emotionally, sexually. She has an absolute fear of violence of any sort, which is in complete opposition to her using violence. The thing is, as per her "training", when all else fails - violence won't fail.

The last time she tried to de-brain me with a coffee cup (they're bl00dy hard you know!!!) ... she then stormed out, leaving me with a hole in my head and 2 crying kids, the 3rd kid was trying to stem the blood. Now i promise i didn't use any violence before or after (i've never hit a woman in my life). My only crime was trying to walk away (like the story in the op).

I didn't realise it then, but the threat of losing me was the hot button. It's what made her go "crazy". Our inability to "talk about it" is what brought things to a head (no pun intended).

We're in it for the long haul though, and it's my duty to stand by her, and help her get through ALL the issues. The kids are ok, they see that marriage isn't always a bunch of roses, and they also saw that you don't tick mommy off, ever. But i guess they know what violence looks like ( i tried keeping it from them) and what forgiveness looks like too.

In good times AND bad.

These things are far more common than any would give credit for. Of course i wouldn't go report it to police, although some friends did see her .. in action. What is most notable from my experience is how vulnerable i felt for a LONG time afterwards. That surprised me i think. Something about the danger in your own bedroom.

Violence can come from either partner, it's not just the boys who do it. BUT, in both girls and boys it's never a one off event. It has a clear source (even if unclear at the time) and must be dealt with, otherwise it will return again.

Thanks for reading my little confession, i hope it maybe helps open the understanding of such a tragedy as domestic violence.

Domestic violence against men is very often hidden because men don't want appear weak by admitting to being victims of violence by women, the old "bashed by a woman disgrace".

My first wife use to try & hit me & I would just block it.

When she would try & hit me, I would say "what if I hit you". She would reply that "real men don't hit women". I would reply "but it is ok for you to hit me." She would reply "you're a man aren't you, real men can take it".

She was trash. Best thing I ever did was escaping that slut.


As to the murderess, I hope she ends up on death row.

[edit on 19-7-2010 by acrux]

Originally posted by ThaLoccster
Also overlooked, is the widely unreported cases of domestic abuse by women.

It may not be as prevalent, or maybe it is but there is a stigma or disbelief about getting abused by women. But it does happen, I've seen it.

Maybe the husband was fleeing an abusive relationship himself, this same situation often plays out when a woman is trying to leave an abusive relationship.

EDIT:

I just had to add a story.

I knew a guy, former Marine, shot and taken hostage in Somalia. Pretty tough guy in the end.

His girlfriend, treated him in a way I have only seen women get treated in movies. She mentally, verbally, and physically abused this guy, and he sat around taking it like a broken down dog.

One instance that comes to mind, we were in the car together and they started one of the many arguments they would have. At some point she remarked that she would "slap the # out of him", he replied that if she slapped him he'd "probably pop her".

She flew off the lid, began screaming at him that "she wishes he would" and "I'll call someone that will come kill you for just talking about hitting me".

I was kind of in disbelief, she threaten to slap him over something trivial, when he stated he'd defend himself she replied she'd have him murdered just for thinking about it.

I could never in my life allow people to speak to or treat me like that, especially someone who claimed to love me.

[edit on 7/18/2010 by ThaLoccster]

I have a nephew who got custody because the mother of his two kids was (is) psychopathic! This woman ran her car into his passenger side with the kids in the car because he was with his wife. She also set him up by jumping him at a grocery store parking lot while some of her friends posed as witnesses. That's just some personal experience. Another - I thought it was love and that men just spoke that way because they were taught to conceal their feelings. Boy the excuses we can come up with when justifying staying with an abusive person. Mostly verbal until one day I opened my dorm door and he threw me across the room. The soccer team debated long and hard on whether I was defending myself when they pulled me off of him with a pair of scissors because they didn't see him throw me. All in all, I got out of that situation long before it got worse than this - but most don't. Also, there is no equality in this situation; if you are feeling emasculated by a woman, just leave that woman. Violence is not your right or the answer! Up until the 19th amendment, men were the only people listened to when it came to domestic violence. Women who left, left without the kids back then because women had no rights. Most of you who have commented to the contrary weren't alive during this period of time, nor have you bothered to investigate it. So maybe a tad bit research before opening mouth and inserting foot. But to add; a woman has no right threatening a man because she's a woman, just like a man has no right threatening a woman. Anyone that needs to be told that, needs a shrink with a comfy couch.

It is really sad that this woman gives a bad name to people who are ACTUAL advocates helping raise awareness on domestic violence. However, it doesn't mean that there aren't women out there who need help. People who say that it is a waste of money apparently have never dealt with domestic violence and don't care how it can affect a person. Think about those women with small children who are beaten by their husbands/boyfriends and finally have the courage to leave. If they have nowhere to go, what do you suppose they do? Shelters are important. The fight against domestic violence is important. One messed up lady shouldn't change that.

Originally posted by pai mei
www.primitivism.com...

Most people do not see, understand, or care very much about this catastrophe of the planet because they are overwhelmingly preoccupied with grave psychological problems. The environmental crisis is rooted in the psychological crisis of the modern individual.

And I firmly believe this as well. Most of our problems were created by TPTB to keep us occupied so they can kill us all. A Hot Pot of Grits for the Rich of the World! --> Madea!

reply to post by evil incarnate


Go figure... Oh just wait... Very soon a picture will be painted of the abusive husband forcing her to cook his meals and clean his dirty underwear... and probably even made her role-play in the bedroom... she probably felt so degraded and abused that the only escape she could see was to kill him.

I'm sorry, but even after visiting the news link, I still couldn't find a reliable author or source.

Maybe its just me, but this seems a little one sided.