Originally posted by getreadyalready
I would have said Texas, but it is a little iffy right now, so I will go with Oklahoma! It is like Texas-Lite!
Plus you have the Indian
Reservations as sovereign land, and you have a lot of caves and lakes.
Texas-lite?! That's funny!
We've got plenty of flat, treeless land so you don't have to worry about people sneaking up on you. There's no trees to block your view.
The place smells like cow dung so nobody wants to sneak up on you anyway.
The dustbowl was just a fluke and all the people driven insane by the constant swirling dirt clouds were just sissies.
There's hardly ever any teratagenic, hallucinogenic ergot on the grain fields anymore. By God! we sprayed enough pesticides on that stuff that it
wouldn't dare infect the crops anymore.
According to recent articles, we do seem to have a problem naming the first president but Oklahoma wasn't a state back then anyways so who cares,
right?
We do have Indian reservations but several Native Americans seem to have escaped and have been seen partying hardy with the cowboys. No one's sure
who should be rounded up at this point.
I think the Baptists still tar and feather undesirables so if you decide to come here be sure to thump your bible soundly. If that doesn't work,
show them your gun. They're easily distracted by talk of MOA, barrel rifling, etc.
It may be easier to move to Montana or one of those other choice locations. That's it. Keep moving. Off you go.
It's ok now all you Okies. I think they're gone. Anybody up for a trip to the lake or a weekend spelunking?