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Originally posted by LateApexer313
Just a thought here...
I find it hilarious that out of the posts so far, I only have one parent coming forward to post their experiences, yay or nay....
I challenge all the parents out there who know they are guilty and who want to change, to explain why they engage in this style of parenting. I find this fascinating and thank you
Originally posted by TheRedneck
You know, after reading where this discussion is going, I think I need to make an addendum to my last post. I also spanked both my kids when they were young, whenever they needed it. Thankfully, it wasn't often, because it really did hurt me more than it hurt them (used to get so confused when my dad told me that...). That only lasted until the age of about 6 or 7, after which there was no need to spank them.
In contrast, I have known kids who were so out of control by that age they were little more than animals. The parents would finally try some discipline: too late. It had little effect. These children will grow up to one of two destinys: either they will become so shiftless and lazy that they will turn criminal rather than working for a living, or they will be so lazy and shiftless that they will live in poverty and on government assistance for their entire lives. That is not love, and it is not parenting.
I started spanking mine at the age of about 2. All it took was a quick swat on the behind, more noise than substance. They cried, and it tore my heart out. But if I had not done that, they would not be the people they are today. That's love and compassion... and parenting.
TheRedneck
Originally posted by TheRedneck
reply to post by Tiste Andii
While it's not really a 'law' here in the US (at least in Bama), it is a legal grey area. But here's how I dealt with it.
We had one run-in with DHR. A small spat between my wife and myself, she called the cops (who laughed because no one got hit even), and that alerted the DHR. The supervisor came to see us. As soon as she introduced herself, I intorduced myself and added the following words: "I have heard the horror stories about you folks. these are our children. you so much as think about taking them, I will kill you and bury your dead a$$ on this mountain."
She gave me a funny look, I guess because I wasn't smiling. She then nodded, and left. We never heard another word, except a letter stating they had closed 'our case'.
It wasn't a threat. It was a warning, and she knew it. Just be sure you're prepared to face the consequences if they come. I was.
TheRedneck
Originally posted by TheRedneck
I also spanked both my kids when they were young, whenever they needed it.
In contrast, I have known kids who were so out of control by that age they were little more than animals.
Originally posted by LateApexer313
Employers are complaining that the new hires fresh out of college or highschool show up in dirty, torn or rumpled clothing for job interviews, with no resume prepared, no coherent thought process even given to the actual interview. They slouch, only seem to care about the hours and the pay, and ask how many sick days the job comes with.
...
Originally posted by TheRedneck
You know, after reading where this discussion is going, I think I need to make an addendum to my last post. I also spanked both my kids when they were young, whenever they needed it. Thankfully, it wasn't often, because it really did hurt me more than it hurt them (used to get so confused when my dad told me that...). That only lasted until the age of about 6 or 7, after which there was no need to spank them.
Originally posted by TheRedneck
In contrast, I have known kids who were so out of control by that age they were little more than animals. The parents would finally try some discipline: too late. It had little effect. These children will grow up to one of two destinys: either they will become so shiftless and lazy that they will turn criminal rather than working for a living, or they will be so lazy and shiftless that they will live in poverty and on government assistance for their entire lives. That is not love, and it is not parenting.
Originally posted by TheRedneck
I started spanking mine at the age of about 2. All it took was a quick swat on the behind, more noise than substance. They cried, and it tore my heart out. But if I had not done that, they would not be the people they are today. That's love and compassion... and parenting.
TheRedneck
Back to the subject at hand: I believe the "no winners and losers" and the "however you FEEL like you should spell it is correct" has to do with the feminization of the educational system. Men, in general, are results oriented. Women are feelings oriented. The fact that women now control the education system reflects this.
Despite numerous recommendations from experts against spanking young children, a majority of U.S. adults questioned in a recent survey said that they approve of the practice.
Three separate studies of children with serious conduct problems, conducted by Grozier and Katz (1979), Patterson (1982), and Webster-Stratton et al. (1988, 1990), found that when spanking was discontinued and other forms of discipline and behavior management were used instead, the children's behavior improved. A study conducted by researchers at McMasters University found that anxiety disorders, drug and alcohol problems, antisocial behavior, and depression were more prevalent among adults who had been spanked as children.
1. While you may consider it to have been a "small spat", it clearly was not to your wife who felt the need to call the cops. The DHR was also called. Yes, a "small spat"
2. Real men do not threaten people with violence, or use it. The claim that mild punishment, such as smacks or slaps, have no detrimental effects is still widespread because people got this message from their own parents, who got it from theirs. You are a prime example - daddy did it to me, so its ok for me to. Isnt it funny how you mentioned having suffered depression for 5 years.