Life Is Short. Have An Affair.

I'm going by the title of the post here.
If you have a woman who understands you need variety - then how exactly is that an affair?
Good words to live by.

Ok, so on to the rest of the post.
The pastor committing suicide surely had such an idea in the back of his mind for much longer. He didn't just enter depression when this happened, it was merely the straw that broke the camel's back - there is surely a back story to this.

originally posted by: chr0naut
a reply to: Klassified

Perhaps the pastors wife really loved him.

That would be the best reason to forgive and to regret his passing.

To not see that as a possibility, says something.

That's why I said I wasn't sure. Because I am making an allowance for her sincerity.

originally posted by: SachaX
I'm going by the title of the post here.
If you have a woman who understands you need variety - then how exactly is that an affair?
Good words to live by.

Ok, so on to the rest of the post.
The pastor committing suicide surely had such an idea in the back of his mind for much longer. He didn't just enter depression when this happened, it was merely the straw that broke the camel's back - there is surely a back story to this.

Yes there is a back story. Read the OP and the article.

In addition to his work as a pastor, Gibson, 56, taught at New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. Gibson said her husband, who had struggled with depression and addiction in the past, was worried that he would lose his job.

a reply to: Klassified

Wow...

You know, it's sad. But it is only sad for the man's relatives. When a person betrays his own, he should do them the courtesy of remaining alive to take his damned beatings like a man. I feel bad for his kids, because they will not have the opportunity of knocking merry hell out of him for playing their mother for a fool.. no one should be denied that, when the situation calls for it.

originally posted by: Answer

originally posted by: TechniXcality
a reply to: Answer

Just because someone cheats does not mean they deserve to die or that, there death should be met with contempt. This is coming from someone who's wife left and cheated, so it's not because I am a habitual cheater, it's just that I understand that people make mistakes , however mistakes should not be a death sentence, nor a mockery of ones death.

He was a pastor who told people how to live for a living while he was cheating on his wife. He was a hypocrite.

The Bible teaches that suicide is very very wrong and a guaranteed one-way trip to hell. He died as a hypocrite.

I don't care about people cheating... I care about people cheating while they're telling others how to live. I can't stand a hypocrite.

Pastors don't actually tell people how to live, but they are there to assist along life's path through hurts, hardships, sin and spiritual darkness.

The Bible says nothing about suicide directly. It does record the suicide of 7 people and in each instance it was a tragedy.

The message of Christ (and therefore the message of a pastor) is one of undeserved forgiveness, repentance, compassion and godly love.

Christian or pastor or otherwise, cheating on one's life partner is hurtful and damaging to the family, but we all are tempted and we all fall (to some sin) at some stage in our lives.

Unforgiveness is an acid that eats away at who we are. It hurts the unforgiving more than the unforgiven.

a reply to: chr0naut

Excellent post! You said all the things I was thinking as I read through this thread. I was struck by the tragedy of this story when I first read about it earlier in the day. This kind of thing is hurtful, but not worth ending your life when you have so many others who depend on you for so many things and who's lives would be devastated much more by your suicide that the fact that you were human and fell short.

originally posted by: Answer

originally posted by: chr0naut

originally posted by: Answer
Oh well... he lived like a hypocrite and died like a hypocrite.

You do know that all Christians (including pastors) are not sinless?

Obviously.

A man who cheats on his wife while telling people how to live their life under the guise of religion is still scum.

The book of Hosea in the Bible recounts the story of a prophet who married a woman who constantly cheated on him and betrayed him and the marriage again and again.

Through all this, he loved her and forgave her.

The prophetic part of this account was that God was pointing out how He loves us but we keep 'cheating' on Him.

It is because of God's love that He is willing to forgive. It is because of God's love that we cause Him such pain, which He willingly endures like a lover.

a reply to: TechniXcality

I'm really sorry that all of that happened to you and I have to say that every single post you made on this is incredibly well said and insightful. I don't think that I would have the presence of mind to see the whole picture in your shoes and it really brought the situation into perspective. That man clearly had many problems and did not deserve to die; cheater, hypocrite, whatever... He deserved to be ashamed of the truth, but not dead. The whole thing just... It just makes me sad.

originally posted by: chr0naut

originally posted by: Answer

originally posted by: TechniXcality
a reply to: Answer

Just because someone cheats does not mean they deserve to die or that, there death should be met with contempt. This is coming from someone who's wife left and cheated, so it's not because I am a habitual cheater, it's just that I understand that people make mistakes , however mistakes should not be a death sentence, nor a mockery of ones death.

He was a pastor who told people how to live for a living while he was cheating on his wife. He was a hypocrite.

The Bible teaches that suicide is very very wrong and a guaranteed one-way trip to hell. He died as a hypocrite.

I don't care about people cheating... I care about people cheating while they're telling others how to live. I can't stand a hypocrite.

Pastors don't actually tell people how to live, but they are there to assist along life's path through hurts, hardships, sin and spiritual darkness.

The Bible says nothing about suicide directly. It does record the suicide of 7 people and in each instance it was a tragedy.

The message of Christ (and therefore the message of a pastor) is one of undeserved forgiveness, repentance, compassion and godly love.

Christian or pastor or otherwise, cheating on one's life partner is hurtful and damaging to the family, but we all are tempted and we all fall (to some sin) at some stage in our lives.

Unforgiveness is an acid that eats away at who we are. It hurts the unforgiving more than the unforgiven.

Apparently you haven't attended the same kinds of churches that I have, Pastors, do tell you how to live, right down to the amount that you ought to give to the church. I have never heard a pastor speak of compassion, but repentance, and paying for that repentance is an important message.

My heart aches for his family, suffering from periodic bouts of depression my entire adult life, I do understand.

But then, I do not go out and tell others how they should live or conduct their lives.

a reply to: redhorse

Thank you for your kind words, some days are still very hard, however i don't wish that it had never happened. I'm learning myself, I'm learning about forgiveness, the key concept I believe for me to become the best possible man I can be.

When it first happened and the news was broke I would break down occasionally whilst driving punching the steering wheel crying out, swearing her existence, I am now focusing on picking up and forgiving.

it's the hardest challenge I've ever faced, but I am facing it to become a better man. No one deserves the pain I went through even the cheater. That's where I stand on this matter

It's not that folks are applauding this man's death, it just that people especially clergy moralize a lot , slut shaming, gay bashing threatening brimstone and fire at folks inside and outside their congregation for real or perceived personal failings, I can't say if this preacher did the same, I don't know but I would be surprised if he didn't do so.
Btw the people behind the release of other people's private lives to the public are dirt bags, if they were hurt by a partner, then they should handle their own business and not drag people they don't even know into a world of sht.

originally posted by: BubbaJoe

originally posted by: chr0naut

originally posted by: Answer

originally posted by: TechniXcality
a reply to: Answer

Just because someone cheats does not mean they deserve to die or that, there death should be met with contempt. This is coming from someone who's wife left and cheated, so it's not because I am a habitual cheater, it's just that I understand that people make mistakes , however mistakes should not be a death sentence, nor a mockery of ones death.

He was a pastor who told people how to live for a living while he was cheating on his wife. He was a hypocrite.

The Bible teaches that suicide is very very wrong and a guaranteed one-way trip to hell. He died as a hypocrite.

I don't care about people cheating... I care about people cheating while they're telling others how to live. I can't stand a hypocrite.

Pastors don't actually tell people how to live, but they are there to assist along life's path through hurts, hardships, sin and spiritual darkness.

The Bible says nothing about suicide directly. It does record the suicide of 7 people and in each instance it was a tragedy.

The message of Christ (and therefore the message of a pastor) is one of undeserved forgiveness, repentance, compassion and godly love.

Christian or pastor or otherwise, cheating on one's life partner is hurtful and damaging to the family, but we all are tempted and we all fall (to some sin) at some stage in our lives.

Unforgiveness is an acid that eats away at who we are. It hurts the unforgiving more than the unforgiven.

Apparently you haven't attended the same kinds of churches that I have, Pastors, do tell you how to live, right down to the amount that you ought to give to the church. I have never heard a pastor speak of compassion, but repentance, and paying for that repentance is an important message.

My heart aches for his family, suffering from periodic bouts of depression my entire adult life, I do understand.

But then, I do not go out and tell others how they should live or conduct their lives.

That is very unchristian.

Pastors aren't any less sinners than any other human, nor should they be dictating about how much one should give.

In the old testament, the Hebrew people were asked to give 1/10th of their increase (profit) to the Temple.

Jesus pointed out that it was having a heart for giving, not giving out of duty, that was what God wanted. He had a parable about wealthy people giving a portion of their wealth and compared it to a poor widow who gave a little,but it was all she had. He said that God regarded what the widow gave was far more valuable than what the rich gave. It was the heart of offering and sacrifice that was more important than the amount.

The Bible does not say how Jesus earned money and survived during his years of ministry. He definitely moved around a lot and could not have held down anything like a steady job. He was, however, a tradesman, so perhaps he did odd jobs. It would seem that Jesus had a bigger life goal than acquiring wealth.

American sexuality being based on Biblical ideals is a constant source of amusement to Europeans where mistresses for the husband and lovers for the wife is a common practice.

Iv'e always thought that sexual repression is one of the contributing factors of why Americans are so violent.

geraldmceachern.blogspot.com...

originally posted by: TechniXcality
a reply to: Answer

Just because someone cheats does not mean they deserve to die or that, there death should be met with contempt. This is coming from someone who's wife left and cheated, so it's not because I am a habitual cheater, it's just that I understand that people make mistakes , however mistakes should not be a death sentence, nor a mockery of ones death.

You are so right.

AND..... we need to think about what decisions we make in life so that something like this tragedy does not become a part of us. Even the "intent" to commit this act by signing up on the website shows our "intent" or desire for what we want.

The flesh is weak and addictions can make us do things that we would not normally do. Remain on guard against these types of weaknesses and fight back and these addictions will leave.

originally posted by: chr0naut
The Bible says nothing about suicide directly.

Most people will not pick up a Bible.

But they will look at NDE's.

I think that's why God sends so many NDE's back with a message.

I too was tempted to commit suicide by hanging many years ago.

If I had known then what I do now about the suicide NDE's cited below, I don't believe I would have ever given it any serious thought.

"As a young woman, Tamara Laroux was in an immense amount of emotional pain. One day she decided to finally end it once and for all and she took a .38 and shot herself in the chest. What happened next was a complete and total shock to her...." Tamara Laroux

"Angie Fenimore, a wife and mother haunted by abuse in childhood and overwhelmed by despair, was in a desperate state of mind. On January 8, 1991, she committed suicide, hoping to escape her sense of emptiness and suffering. But clinical death didn't draw her to the light seen in so many near-death experiences."

“Tell her that if she decides to go through with the taking of her life, there are eternal consequences that she will have to deal with for the rest of her eternal life. The PAIN that she will cause her daughter and immediate family members will be severe and permanent!

Angie Fenimore - NDE

"Then I heard a voice of awesome power, not loud but crashing over me like a booming wave of sound; a voice that encompassed such ferocious anger that with one word it could destroy the universe, and that also encompassed such potent and unwavering love that, like the sun, it could coax life from the earth. I cowered at its force and at its excruciating words:

"Is this what you really want? Don't you know that this is the worst thing you could have done?"

I could feel his anger and frustration, both because I'd thrown in the towel and because I had cut myself off from him and from his guidance.

So I answered: "But my life is so hard."

"You think that was hard? It is nothing compared to what awaits you if you take your life."

When the Father spoke, each of his words exploded into a complex of meanings, like fireworks, tiny balls of light that erupted into a billion bits of information, filling me with streams of vivid truth and pure understanding." Angie Fenimores NDE & Suicide

originally posted by: Answer
Oh well... he lived like a hypocrite and died like a hypocrite.

Oh, not really so different from the rest of us then?
Preachers, whoda thunkit?
(Jimmy Swaggart, Jim Bakker ::cough:

originally posted by: TechniXcality
a reply to: Answer

Just because someone cheats does not mean they deserve to die or that, there death should be met with contempt. This is coming from someone who's wife left and cheated, so it's not because I am a habitual cheater, it's just that I understand that people make mistakes , however mistakes should not be a death sentence, nor a mockery of ones death.

Some experience and emotions in life are just too toxic to hold on to.
Forgive, forget or both but move ahead.
Looking back will kill you as sure as it did Lot's wife.
I know these to be the most meaningful words I've ever written.
After 20 years you can even attend the same social functions and pretend you never wanted to strangle each other.

originally posted by: olaru12
American sexuality being based on Biblical ideals is a constant source of amusement to Europeans where mistresses for the husband and lovers for the wife is a common practice.

Iv'e always thought that sexual repression is one of the contributing factors of why Americans are so violent.

geraldmceachern.blogspot.com...

WOW...... this is sick........ so monkey see...monkey do, huh? This is the problem..... people with twisted ideas giving bad advice.

You should stop giving advice and trying to make Adultery sound acceptable which it is not. It has broken up many families; leaving children without a father or mother.

When I got married I committed myself to my partner as if we became one and part of this bond is trust and respect for one another. Having an affair shows no respect or love for your partner.

No bible needs to teach this basic moral understanding, it should be common sense.

P.S...... I have been happily married for over 35 years....

I can completely see how the hack and news of it could drive up sunscribership. At least for 3 different reasons:

1. Hacked once already, the company will most likely be extra secure moving forward.

2.With the publicity it's getting and the media coverage, it's making it seem like a lot of women actually use this site. Coming from a sales background, one of the best sales tactics on women is the "Jones effect." If it gives off the notion everyone else is doing it and other women are finding success, it makes it more acceptable as an option and/or enticing.

3. This in turn will make more men want to join. If they hear of real success on an online site such as this, it's bound to get more guys signing up.

a reply to: Asktheanimals

Oh I agree, forgiveness for me is where I struggle but am making strides daily.