Stupid self inflicted injuries. Share you stupidity.

We all do it, A fleeting moment of stupidity followed by agony.

I was carrying a pasta machine earlier today and dropped it. For some reason in the split second between it falling and hitting the floor I decided to to try and catch it on my foot and flick it back into my hand like a hacky sack??

Pretty much broke my shin and a bruise like you would not beleive? what was I thinking.

A few years ago I was carrying my dinner in one hand and a glass of beer and a knife and fork in the other. For reasons that I cannot explain I decided to take a drink of my beer mid journey and stuck a fork in my eye.

IN MY EYE!! What was I thinking?

Pasta machine on shin I give a stupidity of 4/10. Pain 4/10.

Fork in the eye I would say a good 5/10 stupidity and at least a 6/10 pain.

It cannot be just me that hurts themselves in stupid ways, share your story and give marks out of ten for stupidity and pain.

Got pissed off playing golf and used a 3 wood to take a swing at a trash receptacle.

Club bounced off and slammed into my leg just above my ankle. Still have a nice purple scar from it, nearly 15 years later.

And no, I don't play golf anymore.

Using acetylene torch with cloth tennis shoes on at work. Didnt know it , looked down and saw a small hole burned in my shoe.Took my shoe off. Small hole burned into sock. Took sock off , small hole burned in top of foot . Flash embedded in foot. Another life lesson learned.

I was with a bunch of friends, started feeling cocky, and proclaimed: "you can't cut yourself with a butter knife!". I then proceeded to get a butter knife, grasped the blade tight and tugged. Turns out you CAN cut yourself. I never drank southern comfort again.

Let's see.

In college we lived in a miserable hole of a basement apartment. Thing had a seriously low ceiling and a ceiling fan. I am relatively tall with very long arms. One day, I lost track of where I was, stretched up, and put my fingers into the ceiling fan.

We are talking the sort of pain that makes you vomit. I may have broken at least one of the two fingers, if not both, but since I didn't have insurance at the time and there's not much to be done for a broken finger that isn't seriously misaligned, I instead spent the next period of time sitting in a chair, trying not to puke and trying to just bear the pain.

And now, years later, I am blessed with arthritis pain beginning in those same two fingers.

I'd say ... 8 out of 10 at injury with a 2 out of 10 annoyance factor now.

And for the "LOLs":

When I was in junior high, we used to go out to my grandparents house and run wild over the property more or less wherever we wanted. Well, there were parts that would be really overgrown, and there would be old fencing and barbed wire and stuff that you had to watch out for when you went through.

This time, we were having an all cousins snowball fight, and so I was running hell for leather one way and missed the single strand of wire across my path. I smacked straight into it and fell flat on my face. It caught me across one thigh. Do you think I learned from that mistake? Heck no! Sure enough, not long afterward, I come back running hell for leather the other way and ran smack into the same strand of wire going the other direction. Caught myself across the top of the other thigh.

I was so proud of those matching, hand-sized bruises across the tops of both thighs in gym class the following week.

I didn't notice much pain when I did it. It was just the embarrassment more than anything.

a reply to: nonspecific

Day, night, and early morning boozing session at a pals place. She's got a broken knee, so like the stand up guy I am, I offer to take out the mass of bottles that the gathered throng have amassed. Its been raining, the metal steps are slick. My foot skims and misses the last step but one, and I go down to the ground on one knee, shredding my trousers, the skin under my kneecap, and mashing asphalt and assorted detritus into the wound. I then walk three miles home, as punishment for my stupidity.

Stupidity= 5
Pain= 1.5/2

Let's face it... I've had worse.

That was last weekend!

I bought one of those sprinklers with motion detection to get rid of pests that were eating up a flower bed. Aimed it wrong, thing activated, went to dodge the spray and bounced my head off the corner of the garage.

Installing a new door, its late and I am rushing to get it buttoned up before dark.

I had to trim some siding that was over hanging the door, so I grabbed my retractable razor knife.

Now I KNOW BETTER. BUT, I was holding the siding below and cutting from the top down.

All of a sudden it slipped and I felt it smash into my index finger VERY hard. I was afraid to look figuring my finger was gone. The blood was just running out of my clenched hand.

Before it even contacted my finger I was cursing my stupidity! It was that split second thinking "you dumb F#@!", then BAM.

I finally stopped dancing around and cursing myself and brought myself to look. It was still attached!.

Turns out it cut most of the way through the bone, but the doc said I was 'lucky'.

15 stiches later and a splint I was good to go. 5 years later my left index finger is still numb.

I still think, what a dumb ass!! And my wife still laughs about it!

Some good stories so far but I think Ketsuko takes it with the hand in ceiling fan so far, Thats the kind of pain you can imagine.

I have repeated stupid injury that everyone does repeatedly . Walking behind a vehicle and whacking your shin on the trailer hitch. It's like getting an anvil because they are in movable .

a reply to: nonspecific

Was in an active zone in the Limpopo valley on the Zimbabwe border, my associate shot a Kudu at about 1000 yards. I was so impressed with shot and knowing we were going to brai (BBQ) that Kudu at the base, I did something stupid. When we got to the animal in the Jeep, I jumped out, went over to it and put my arms out with two thumbs up. In a split second I was on my back on the ground with the wind knocked out of me and a broken rib. I took a round from a sniper with a .308, but I was wearing a vest, so no entry. It was the first time I learned bullets have the right of way.

BTW, it hurts every time it's going to rain so I get regular reminders lol.

Cheers - Dave

a reply to: stosh64

I actually winced and closed my eyes before finishing your story before I remembered that I would need to read it to find out.

Stupidity comes in a moment, glad to see you can smile about it now.

a reply to: Greathouse

What would you say is worse, walking upstairs and thinking there is an extra step or walking downstairs and doing the same?

a reply to: nonspecific

Hand related here...

Many moons ago, I had been crashing at a friends place, and they had a metal framed sliding door on their conservatory.

Everyone is out in the garden...

I decided to do an Ace Ventura impression, the scene where he displays his knowledge of sound muffling. So I open and close the door, singing all the time... I then get the index and middle fingers on my right hand between the door and frame some how, and crush the living hell out of them.

At the hospital, I had to have a hot needle poked through my fingernails to release the built up blood in them, and had to strap those suckers up for about two weeks.

Stupidity=All the way to eleven, because nothing is dumber than showing off.
Pain= a solid 7.

originally posted by: bobs_uruncle
a reply to: nonspecific

Was in an active zone in the Limpopo valley on the Zimbabwe border, my associate shot a Kudu at about 1000 yards. I was so impressed with shot and knowing we were going to brai (BBQ) that Kudu at the base, I did something stupid. When we got to the animal in the Jeep, I jumped out, went over to it and put my arms out with two thumbs up. In a split second I was on my back on the ground with the wind knocked out of me and a broken rib. I took a round from a sniper with a .308, but I was wearing a vest, so no entry. It was the first time I learned bullets have the right of way.

BTW, it hurts every time it's going to rain so I get regular reminders lol.

Cheers - Dave

HOLY S%$!
OK, couple questions.

!. Your jeep was there, you just drove up. Did you ever find the MORON who shot you?

2. You had a bullet proof vest on? Is that normal where you hunt?

Even with a vest you are lucky to be here considering it was a .308.

a reply to: nonspecific

Honest to god...i was making Giardiniera and was cutting up jalepenos. Now I have done this before where I got some in my eye so I actually wear rubber gloves when I make it...well for whatever stupid reason I went to pee after I was finished and didnt take off the gloves. Finished my business and thought "I don't have to wash my hand...ill just take off the gloves afterwards!". Thinking im a total genius for my idea to save time I started to feel a burn. I'm telling you my crotch was on fire like the Dickens.

The worst part was I was single at the time and had a date...I was actually preparing dinner for us. I was uncomfortable the whole night from burning often taking bathroom breaks to try to ease the pain. Well at one point the moment came where she wanted to mess around and I just broke down and told her the truth that I couldnt cause I was on fire from jalepenos on my stuff....she totally felt rejected and left shortly after....and I never got a second date haha.

a reply to: nonspecific

I was able to laugh at myself in the emergency room.

My wife still tells me it was a 'senior moment'. She thinks she is funny, good thing I love her

originally posted by: TrueBrit
a reply to: nonspecific

Hand related here...

Many moons ago, I had been crashing at a friends place, and they had a metal framed sliding door on their conservatory.

Everyone is out in the garden...

I decided to do an Ace Ventura impression, the scene where he displays his knowledge of sound muffling. So I open and close the door, singing all the time... I then get the index and middle fingers on my right hand between the door and frame some how, and crush the living hell out of them.

At the hospital, I had to have a hot needle poked through my fingernails to release the built up blood in them, and had to strap those suckers up for about two weeks.

Stupidity=All the way to eleven, because nothing is dumber than showing off.
Pain= a solid 7.

That is exactly the kind of stupidity I am talking about.

"Hey everybody look at me!"

"Ambulance please"

21, stayed up all night playing video games and we started acting silly from being up all night. Chasing each other around throwing a nerf ball at each other, I went to jump from one sofa to the other and cought my left big toe on the wooden arm of the sofa with enough force to break my toe. Couldn't walk right for a month and the toe nail turned black almost instantly and then fell off after about 6 weeks or so while I was water skiing.
That's why our parents tell us that we are going to get hurt if we jump on the furniture.

Pain....about 6/10
Stupidity. ....5/10

originally posted by: rockpaperhammock
a reply to: nonspecific

Honest to god...i was making Giardiniera and was cutting up jalepenos. Now I have done this before where I got some in my eye so I actually wear rubber gloves when I make it...well for whatever stupid reason I went to pee after I was finished and didnt take off the gloves. Finished my business and thought "I don't have to wash my hand...ill just take off the gloves afterwards!". Thinking im a total genius for my idea to save time I started to feel a burn. I'm telling you my crotch was on fire like the Dickens.

The worst part was I was single at the time and had a date...I was actually preparing dinner for us. I was uncomfortable the whole night from burning often taking bathroom breaks to try to ease the pain. Well at one point the moment came where she wanted to mess around and I just broke down and told her the truth that I couldnt cause I was on fire from jalepenos on my stuff....she totally felt rejected and left shortly after....and I never got a second date haha.

I have felt that pain, there are few things like that gradual burning sensation that will not subside and the fear that you will have to admit to your stupidity.

The last time I did this(and there have been a few) I had to tell my good lady that dinner was ready but I was indisposed.

By indisposed I mean that I was in the bathroom with my bits in the sink and the cold tap running for an hour or more.

I give that a pin factor of at least 7, stupidity 5.