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Does anyone else not feel emotions?

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posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 12:17 AM
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Does anyone else not feel emotions when they should?

This is something that has been in my head for quite sometime. My grandmother passed away when I was 17 years old, I was very close to her and would visit her every summer and spend a few weeks with her. She was like a second mother to me. She was diagnosed with cancer and subsequently passed away a few months after her diagnosis. Aside from the initial shock after learning that she had a very advanced form of cancer, I didn't feel particularly sad and I don't know why. She was almost like a second mother to me, I don't know why I didn't feel any grief or sadness when I saw her everyday during her last weeks alive. I still remember family members coming from all over the country to visit her and they all showed a lot of emotions she was loved by a lot of people, she was no doubt a very good woman.

Throughout all of this, there I was trying to hide the fact that I wasn't showing any signs of grief or sadness. I felt bad because I knew I should have shown some kind of emotion. I still remember faking my emotions and acting as if I were crying.

A couple of years after my grandmother passed away my cousin was in a very serious motorcycle accident, as a result of this he had to have one of his legs amputated. Again I didn't feel any grief or concern about his well being.

The main incident that has made me question whether or not there might be something wrong with my emotions was when my mother told me that during one of her medical checkups her doctor had detected a mass in her pancreas. Any mass or tumor in the pancreas typically means pancreatic cancer, which is one of the most aggressive cancers there are. Again aside from the initial shock when I found out about it, I was emotionally numb throughout the whole experience. I faked my emotions because I didn't feel an ounce of concern even though it was my mother.

I've read a lot of papers that say that people have their own ways of dealing with things like these, but I'd like to know if anyone here is like this? When I was eight years old I was diagnosed with high functioning autism, but I don't know if this has anything to do with that.

Does anyone else here not feel any kind of emotion when you go through a difficult family situation?




posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 12:30 AM
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You are ready to enter Jedi training



posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 12:37 AM
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Condolences on your grandmother passing ..

Grieving takes many different forms .. people grieve in different ways .. some totally fall apart others silently grieve .. there is no right/wrong way to grieve .. remember the person they live on in your heart and memory ..

As to something wrong with you .. no like everyone else your human and have your own unique way of expressing yourself ..
edit on 31/7/14 by Expat888 because: typo.. grr bloody english ..



posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 12:38 AM
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Just having fun. I've been distanced myself from death as an emotional state tending to "Spock" it....It was inevitable, I knew the end result and now that result is here. I too have a mild Aspergers thing going on which led to segregation as a child. Watching my dad die I cried because of the human spirit I witnessed in those trying to save him, his time had come and was expected. Did I feel emotion for my dad? Very much so but no amount of emotional out pour from me would bring him back.



posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 01:16 AM
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Nobody but yourself can define how you should feel about a situation. As long as your thoughts or perceptive lack of emotion, does not cause any harm upon you or anyone else I wouldn't perceive it as a 'problem'.



posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 01:52 AM
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You dont sound emotionless. Even autistic people and sociopaths have emotions. You simply have a supressive defense system. You dont express your feelings because you can not handle them. Might want to talk things over with someone close as you not expressing your emotions it can build up on you.



posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 02:18 AM
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a reply to: muse7

Is it just this type of emotion or can you also not feel love, emotional suppression can have psychological causes such as repressed emotions that you can not cope with so your mind just shut's them off and this can happen in relation to a nervous breakdown.

OR did you ever have a paranormal experience in which you felt sharp pin like pain's in you chest above your physical heart followed by a complete lack of emotion which would perhaps cause a need to compensate for the missing emotions by feeding physical desire's which have there emotion like sensation originating in the enegative emotion centre of the stomach area, like a constant hunder even when you are not hungry like you can not fill the void left by your missing positive emotions, this can lead to selfishness but is not the fault of the injured soul rather they whom did this to them.

It may also be that you knew at some level that your Nan was OK where ever she went and that one day you may see her again.



posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 03:09 AM
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You don't feel any emotions yet you made a thread about how we should be more compassionate to illegal immigrant children?



posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 03:18 AM
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Labtech, i am a lurker. However when i read your comment about the feeling hungry all the time and can't fill the void, i just had to post. I have all those symptoms. I'm having severe hunger right now even though I've eaten just 15 mins ago. I have been experiencing this for a few weeks now. Usually i get the sharp pain as you described, along with the feeling of being extremely hungry. Often these symptoms are followed by an extremely bad panic attack. I do experience emotion though. I cry during commercials! Ha ha
What do you know about this? What do you believe this is? What can I do?
a reply to: LABTECH767



posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 03:34 AM
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originally posted by: smithjustinb
You don't feel any emotions yet you made a thread about how we should be more compassionate to illegal immigrant children?


Yes I'm quite glad to say that I am capable of feeling empathy and compassion. This thread is about me not feeling grief and sorrow when I should.



posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 03:46 AM
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I do it. I always go numb when it comes to death and loss. sometimes for as long as a year. Sometimes I don't grieve at all until 15 years later, other times it eventually hits me and I break down hard. If you look at my posts over the last several months I sound normal for about the first month after my kids death. I was in shock. I completely dissociated. Then I totally broke down and was nearly hospitalized. Before it kicked in I was overwhelmed with guilt, but I know now it was my mind protecting it's self. The mind processes loss with protecting it's self at the forefront.



posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 03:51 AM
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a reply to: muse7
Just maybe you realize the journey is not over, but just beginning.
Just maybe you are more happy for their gain than you are sad for your loss of them.
Carry on, you'll get there.

edit on 31-7-2014 by g146541 because: coffee and blueberry muffins.



posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 05:30 AM
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a reply to: muse7

I think I can reply to this one. I believe that since you are a "high functioning Autistic person",that yes that has everything to do with it. For I have it too. And I do know that there have been times in my life were I have had to 'fake' emotions so as to not draw attention to myself being odd.

We do feel everything that everyone else does,and yet we may not feel it at the same time as others. We have a tendency to 'compartmentalize' different things that happen in our lives if our subconscious feels that it is being over whelmed. Then later on when our mind feels that it can now handle that situation,it pulls it out and we can examine it and let emotions roll over us to deal with. Its what causes people to look at us strange when we suddenly have an inappropriate emotional response to things around us. We are replaying a different scenario in our heads then what is currently going on. We respond to what we are playing in our heads ,and may cry when things are fine,or laugh out loud when it seems that nothing is funny.

I would not worry about it, just pretend to feel those emotions to throw others off like you have been doing.When your mind is ready,it will pull out the different stressful situations you mention here and the emotions will come on their own,so you can then work through them at your own time frame. Good luck to you and don't let it overwhelm you when it comes.



posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 07:54 AM
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a reply to: muse7

I understand your experience. Deep sadness and a sense of permanent loss are quite difficult for me to express when they are the result of my own vulnerability. On the flip side, I can witness someone in a heart-wrenching situation and cry for them - but definitely not for myself in those same circumstances. For me personally, this somewhat wooden reaction is rooted in my own childhood, when I was sent very clear and painful messages that my own sadness was something worthy of punishment. As a result, it takes me a very long time to process loss and any other emotions related to my own vulnerability. I would encourage you to explore your memories for moments where your deepest and most vulnerable emotions were dismissed, made to be the source of humor, or punished. The reason I encourage you to go deep into your earliest memories in this search is because we are most-easily taught which parts of ourselves are valid and which have no importance in our early life. You sound like someone taught early that their sadness was irrelevant, funny or so uncomfortable for others that you were reprimanded until the sadness of loss was permanently suppressed.



posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 10:14 AM
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a reply to: muse7

I kind of go through the same thing when it comes to death in my family.

However, I think part of it is due to my belief system. I don't view death as an end, so for me personally, someone passing on, is viewed as a great adventure, and I am happy for them.

People think it is strange or that I am cold, when really, I am going to miss them, but know they are having a blast on the other side.

It prevents me from feeling the heavy grief many people experience.



posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 10:21 AM
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a reply to: muse7

en.wikipedia.org... >???


Alexithymia /ˌeɪlɛksəˈθaɪmiə/ is a personality construct characterized by the sub-clinical inability to identify and describe emotions in the self.[1] The core characteristics of alexithymia are marked dysfunction in emotional awareness, social attachment, and interpersonal relating.[2] Furthermore, individuals suffering from alexithymia also have difficulty in distinguishing and appreciating the emotions of others, which is thought to lead to unempathic and ineffective emotional responding.[2] Alexithymia is prevalent in approximately 10% of the general population and is known to be comorbid with a number of psychiatric conditions



posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 10:29 AM
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originally posted by: Mjab6910
Labtech, i am a lurker. However when i read your comment about the feeling hungry all the time and can't fill the void, i just had to post. I have all those symptoms. I'm having severe hunger right now even though I've eaten just 15 mins ago. I have been experiencing this for a few weeks now. Usually i get the sharp pain as you described, along with the feeling of being extremely hungry. Often these symptoms are followed by an extremely bad panic attack. I do experience emotion though. I cry during commercials! Ha ha
What do you know about this? What do you believe this is? What can I do?
a reply to: LABTECH767



Deep seated worry's even held at a subconscious level can express themselves like this, many obese eat not out of hunger but out of anxiety, emotional injury, worry and stress can have very physical consequences as the mind rules the body.

Best thing is to think on what is happening in your life, dont let it beat you, let your appetite bow to your will but a good trick is by a pack of suger free chewing gum or mint's and when you feel the urge to eath and are not hungry take one, part of your mind is deliberatly distracting itself from something else.

Loneliness can also express itself in this way, often when you worry about someone else it helps to take your mind off your own situation but a good engrossing paperback novel with old fashioned pages can give the mind something to do as it projects the world of the story into the imagination, Novels can be one of the best but often overlooked therapy's.

However if this is a recent symptom it may be best to mention it to your Doctor when you go for a checkup or even arrange an appointment to discuss it, pill's are often not the answer so I personally believe in avoiding medication unless there is no alternative as the body is a finely tuned chemical machine and all medicines mess with the balance of the body, beneficial in some way's but detrimental in other's, bringing your own body into balance through excercise, meditation and healthy eating is the best advice though advice I myself do not practice, probably why I do not have a waist anymore.
edit on 31-7-2014 by LABTECH767 because: (no reason given)



posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 11:09 AM
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I laughed at my grandmothers funeral and got in trouble after, but cried at a baby funeral. I think it's just mixed emotions. Doesn't mean you don't feel anything. Sorry about your grandmother.



posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 11:56 AM
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originally posted by: Aural
You dont sound emotionless. Even autistic people and sociopaths have emotions. You simply have a supressive defense system. You dont express your feelings because you can not handle them. Might want to talk things over with someone close as you not expressing your emotions it can build up on you.


Just a fyi, autistic people actually have an overload of emotion and actually an extreme internalized empathy. For instance, a kid could be getting scolded for bad behavior near an autistic and the autistic will feel like they are being scolded right along with that kid. Kind of a hive mind thing really. Just wanted to chime that in since sticking us next to a sociopath who doesn't care about anybody is kind of ehhhh.... However, it's how we express, which I think may have been your point, that is different. Depending on where they are at on the spectrum, they might shut down (seem cold) or throw a tantrum or rock because they're being driven nuts by the overload. I'm typically the "shut down" type but I'll rock if I'm deeply upset.

To Muse7: If you're wondering if you are somehow without empathy or feeling, then I'd like to point out that you felt bad that you weren't expressing any emotion. That right there rules out that there is something wrong with you in terms of empathy. If you had none, you wouldn't have felt bad. Like others have already said, everyone expresses grief in different ways and sometimes, may not grieve at all. When one of my grandfathers died from ephysema years ago, I was at his hospital bedside every day, talking with him about death for hours as nobody else would and he wanted to talk about it. I didn't cry once the whole time and he never doubted for one second how much I loved him the entire time. In his view, I loved him so much that I was thinking only of helping him pass in peace over my only feelings about his departure and he thanked me every day for it. I saw his passing as being him finally free from the pain, suffering and confinement that emphysema had gripped him with for the prior two years of his life. To feel grief at his passing was the epitome of selfishness in my book.

As a fellow HFA autistic, sometimes we just go numb and it can be a profound numb. I've never felt a lack of concern but I know that my concern does get affected by extenuating events. Like your cousin on the motorcycle--I've found that I'm a lot less sympathetic for someone whose been severely injured because of a dumb choice they made because, well, that was the choice they made. I guess I'm a little Darwinist in that sense. If a relation died in a car wreck because they were drinking and driving, would I be concerned? No, because they should've never stepped behind the wheel. I'd feel more sympathy for any who were harmed because of that relation's poor and selfish choice. That's just how I am and maybe it's not so much Darwinist but justice oriented. May seem cold to some but if one has possibly just one life to live and they squander it with recklessness, then whose fault is that? Life is precious and should be treated as such.

Anyways, as that fellow HFA, that's the range I go through--super numb or nothing at all depending on the circumstance. There's also a sense of futility as well, I'd say. How one feels isn't going to change the outcome when death comes knocking. It's not a lack of love really as I bet you miss your grandmother sometimes just as much as I miss my grandfather from time to time. I'll never forget him and even though he's been gone for 16 years, I still think about him warmly quite often.



posted on Jul, 31 2014 @ 12:21 PM
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Can I get clarification from the OP. You did not say you can not feel love or happiness. Or any of a thousand other emotions. You said you do not feel sadness or grief. Which is fine some people handle loss differently than others. What seems odd to me is that you say more than once that you feel no concern. Like you just do not care that your mother has cancer or you just dont care about your cousin and his leg. Did I read that right. that seems like two different things to me.
edit on 31-7-2014 by karmicecstasy because: (no reason given)





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