Eyes, smiles, and empathy...

I met a woman my age maybe 8 years ago, serving me at a bar, we connected with our eyes, smiles, and empathy. I saw her there a few times but didn't go back because she is visually the least stereotypical 'beautiful' girl I've ever considered...but her eyes, ohmygosh they are more blue than mine and sparkle like we are looking into each others brains, the electricity is intense haha!

I bumped into her again after years some months ago, she manages a pub now, the same eye contact and genuine smile talking to each other, electric, lots of laughter and knowing eyes. She's just not visually the benchmark I do with women. That sounds horrible I know, but it has held me back from turning our interaction into something more.

I don't really know why I posted this but if you identify with any issues in this thread please do share your thoughts.

Women who are not classic beauties are generally better at, um, stuff. Just sayin'.

a reply to: CornishCeltGuy

she is visually the least stereotypical 'beautiful' girl I've ever considered

Unconventional beauty is the most beautiful of them all!
Have you ever seen anyone so ugly they were absolutely magnificent in their uniqueness?
I just love that.

I don't really know why I posted this but if you identify with any issues in this thread please do share your thoughts.

Dude you know you want her, what are you waiting for?? The only issue I see is that maybe you are re-evaluating your own shallowness. What will other people think? Do I really find her attractive?

The only other thing I can think of is, ummm are you sure you are not related?

a reply to: CornishCeltGuy

So you like someone's personality, the way you feel around them and the time you spend with them.

But she's a dog....woof woof.

Good call not "wasting" your time on that one.

a reply to: CornishCeltGuy

With that type of standard, you did her a favor.
She probably doesn't "deserve" a guy like you.

a reply to: schuyler
Haha we would connect well, that is for sure, the eyes never lie!
It is such a tease when we talk though, both know, but I'm holding back so she is as well. I have many female friends and some who I have intimate no strings moments with, all more 'classic pretty' than this girl, but her eyes, smiles, and empathy has got me like a fish close to the hook haha.

a reply to: Bluntone22
Gosh what do you mean?
I'm not better than any other human and I'm kind to everyone I meet.
Was that a dig at me because I mentioned her looks are not why I am attracted to her?
Genuine question.

a reply to: CornishCeltGuy

Be friends. It is obvious that looks are important to you or it wouldn't be an issue. Real love goes beyond the surface.

a reply to: CornishCeltGuy

Dont ignore the deeper connections in life, who knows how deep your connection might be.

a reply to: CornishCeltGuy

To be honest it sounds like you are not willing to date a girl you obviously click with because she doesn't live up to your standard of beauty.

a reply to: JAGStorm
Haha thank you!
I shall make that first move, honestly her eyes and smile, we connect big time, strange thing attraction isn't it.

originally posted by: Bluntone22
a reply to: CornishCeltGuy

To be honest it sounds like you are not willing to date a girl you obviously click with because she doesn't live up to your standard of beauty.

Sorry CornishCeltGuy,

I think Bluetone22 hit the nail on the head.

You said:

I saw her there a few times but didn't go back because she is visually the least stereotypical 'beautiful' girl I've ever considered

She's just not visually the benchmark I do with women

I don't really know why I posted this

So now you have us all VERY curious about the deets, so spill the beans. Is she a different race, is she a big girl, is she manly looking, is she thick, is she anorexic, is she a he? What is so unconventional about her? You know a lot of people fail in their relationships because they keep going after what they think is "their type" it isn't until they widen their horizons do they find true love.

originally posted by: CornishCeltGuy
a reply to: Bluntone22
Gosh what do you mean?
I'm not better than any other human and I'm kind to everyone I meet.
Was that a dig at me because I mentioned her looks are not why I am attracted to her?
Genuine question.

Kindness isn't honesty ...... dishonesty is unkind.

originally posted by: Night Star
a reply to: CornishCeltGuy

Be friends. It is obvious that looks are important to you or it wouldn't be an issue. Real love goes beyond the surface.

There is a massively obvious sexual spark between us, we'd never be just friends in our minds haha, just two folk who haven't been intimate with each other yet.

a reply to: JAGStorm
Just an idea of beauty thing. She is not unusual, just ticks the least boxes in my beauty form than I have been. Sounds shallow as # and it probably is, but an interesting discussion because I'm attracted to her eyes, smiles, and empathy.

originally posted by: Bluntone22
a reply to: CornishCeltGuy

To be honest it sounds like you are not willing to date a girl you obviously click with because she doesn't live up to your standard of beauty.

You phrase it interestingly but yes, visual looks are part of the parcel which is individual fellow humans. I can't help what my preferences are.

Maybe it's not all about you.

How do you know she doesn't look at everyone the same way with "those eyes"?
Sometimes people are aware of their defining features...and naturally use them as often as possible.

originally posted by: IAMTAT
Maybe it's not all about you.

How do you know she doesn't look at everyone the same way with "those eyes"?
Sometimes people are aware of their defining features...and naturally use them as often as possible.

Haha good question!
Nah, different with me in public, other people notice it.
...and yeh I like it.

originally posted by: CornishCeltGuy

You phrase it interestingly but yes, visual looks are part of the parcel which is individual fellow humans. I can't help what my preferences are.

If you asked her nicely maybe she would be willing to wear a burka

on a date.

It would seem there is a use for the burka?

a reply to: CornishCeltGuy

Have you ever hung out with her outside of the bar? Perhaps getting together as friends first, getting to really know each other would help a great deal. Take your time and don't rush into things.