Just lost my baby girl and want to vent.

If it makes you feel better at least know in your heart your child doesn't have to put up with this Deranged world and all the twisted crap in it!.

Now I'm not trying to be cruel, Even though it may sound that way.

The weird crap I've seen / Been through I DOUBT there is a god

My life is totally FUBAR and this isn't the type of world I'd like an Innocent child growing up in!

i know how you feel. My wife lost 5 kids during pregnancy. I'm sorry people have said such things to you as it is not God that had anything to do with it. God's plan is for you to prosper, to have life and have it abundantly. I know you are grieving and may find it hard to see at this time but, these things happen for a number of reasons. The first thing we want to do is blame God and vent our anger at him that its his fault but in reality we live in a world that isn't perfect, tainted by sin, controlled by evil and dominated by wickedness. death is the result of this. we struggle to find meaning of why such things happen but instead of pushing away from God we should draw closer to God where you can find peace and comfort. Multiple times we were in tears holding our little life that is no more, lamenting on the fact that we'll never rock them to sleep, kiss their owies, calm their fears, walk them down the wedding aisle and see their children and the sense that all of that was taken from us. by whom do you say did this? I would suggest during this time to not focus on who did this and assert blame but to draw near to him and let him heal your hearts for God's love grieves for you during this hard time as much as you grieve. After all we been through we just now God blessed us with a little baby girl 2 weeks ago, no complications a perfect healthy baby. keep trying, keep the faith and trust in God he will get you through the hard times. May i suggest having a private meeting with your pastor to help you through this difficult time and get some Godly counseling if that isn't possible I might be able to refer you to people who can give you wholesome counseling. I grieve for you sir, and will pray for you. My joy is knowing that death is not the end that life is never lost that my children are waiting for me and my joy in them will be restored and i will never look back.

reply to post by tracer7


No words can ease what your feeling I'm sure.

But my heart goes out to you and your wife.

Originally posted by fr33kSh0w2012
If it makes you feel better at least know in your heart your child doesn't have to put up with this Deranged world and all the twisted crap in it!.

Now I'm not trying to be cruel, Even though it may sound that way.

The weird crap I've seen / Been through I DOUBT there is a god

My life is totally FUBAR and this isn't the type of world I'd like an Innocent child growing up in!

edit on 28/4/13 by fr33kSh0w2012 because: spelling!

I kinda get your point but the Op is right to feel angry and all other emotions because the situation really suck on a level that is not acceptable to him. I am sorry for your loss OP and you that you have to go thru these feelings. But you having them shows what kind of person you are and that makes me happy .

So sorry to hear of your loss. We all feel a small measure of your pain, my friend, but just remember, when people say those things what they are really trying to say is that they love you; that they are terribly sorry. We can all be bumbling fools sometimes, especially in moments like these, when we just want to say something to give comfort.

Hello dear Daddy - I am so sorry for your and your wife's devastating loss. I think people should just say nothing instead of trying to say anything that fills the silence. Sometimes a hug is the only thing that will help. I really am so sorry that you are left with a broken and empty heart and that your wife's pain is amplifying that pain. You are not alone. You can message me if you need to talk. I just know that while your beautiful daughter was growing inside your wife that she love you. She heard you, recognized your voice, her little heart leaped for joy when she felt your and your wife's love for her. You were already awesome parents. Just know that she loved you and that you loved her. Just concentrate on that and know that THAT love was pure and hold it close to you and feel it. Just take it second by second, hour by hour, day by day. Sending you long hugs and saying in your ear(s), you are not alone. You are NOT alone.

reply to post by tracer7


Thoughts are with you and people sugercoating the situation is inappropriate. Stay strong and best wishes to you and your wife..

God's plan is infanticide??

Originally posted by CristobalColonic
God's plan is infanticide??

Everyone must go through struggles and nothing can change that whether we use god to powdercoat it or not. The truth of the matter is people lose loved ones, even little ones at times and all we can do is respect an grieve that moment when it arises. It is just life unfortunetly and life can be very cruel at times.

Just came in to offer my deepest sympathy and to wish you and your wife the strength and courage to face these dificult times. My Mom lost 2 baby girls prematurely and went on to have 4 children after that. I know that no one can ever take the place of your little angel, but there is hope that you will have children to share your life with and bring you great joy. Much love to you.

reply to post by tracer7


Am very sorry to learn about your loss. I know how it feels. Wanted to share few words that I believe.
For anything and everything that happens to us and gives us pain, we just conveniently blame or abuse god. Still as we know that god means good, whatever he does is for good and better. Thats all big bs. There is no god in reality who is watching and directing our or anyones lives. Its just false. Please do punch in their face who say something you dont want to hear.
Take care and remember pain or happiness doesnt last forever for anyone.

God sounds like a dick. Plain and simple.

Stay strong brother, the feeling of pain an loss is terrible, like being held over a bottmless pit.
But no matter what, stay STRONG. you have every right to be angry an pissed, if it helps the grieving process than by all means, strike your fist at the sky.
Me an my wife just had our newborn, 2 wks old. Everyday I think about her, your right you know...I've pondered the worse an concluded the same. I too get angry when people say that god has a plan, its in his will or some BS, I look at my little one an question myself, how does somthing sooo precious, sooo innocent, sooo pure be taken from this world at such an early age, be part of some grand plan? God works in mysterious ways? Yea I don't agree with that or ever will.
You need to stay strong, look towards the future, be there for your wife, continue to move forward. Mesg me if you ever wanna chat.

No one has asked the obvious question,

What did she succumb to? What did her in?

You have my sympathies...assuming I had any to give. Not to sound cold, somethings I just don't feel. Yet I am truly sorry for your loss.

What ever you do, do not allow this to make you numb. I'm numb, and because of it I dismiss most human interaction.

So again what was her condition? Just curious.

reply to post by tracer7


Orphan is a person who lost his parents, widow is a woman who lost her husband. There is no name for a man who lost his child. Such a pain has no name.

I'm truly sorry for this devastation you & your wife are going through. No words can make the pain go away, people say stupid things all they time. Just remember they do care even if they don't know the right words.

Look after yourself & your wife, if you feel strong enough tell them their words are not working for you & it's not helping. The bigger the devastation the stupider the words of support. I am just so sorry for your loss. Wishing you the strength & support you need at this time.

So sorry for your loss. My little girl lived for less than an hour and it was so sudden and unexpected. Perhaps I can justify saying your precious one is in a better place because that is what comforted me in the long term. For now, however, that idea is a later stage, right now its normal to be angry with God and to question the senselessness of it all. Go with it and know that the intensity of your grief will lessen eventually.

As for that better place, I figured that just because the tv is switched off doesn't mean the program disappears. It really is the best analogy that I can think of. So what worked for me was to imagine that she was always there and still a member of the family. To that end I blew her love often and planted a little corner of the garden with flowers for her. It was such a comforting place and I truly believed that she was there.

Thirty years on, I have my other daughter fully grown and a son born years later. I talk to my boy about his little sister because she still matters and always will. However, I feel it is a tribute to her that we have carried on our lives and tried to be happy, which we are.

Much love to you and your family.

reply to post by tracer7


There are those of us here that have buried a child,

The pain is immeasurable, whilst I cannot honestly say I know how you feel, I know how I felt.

You gotta stay strong my friend, your family needs you now more than ever.

My heartfelt sorrow for your loss and love for your family.

Cody

reply to post by tracer7


I can not imagine your pain. I am so sorry for your loss. Please know that G-d didn't do this. Satan's the one who causes the pain and suffering. My Father can take that pain and turn it into something positive. Lean on Him in your time of sorrow.

Friend's baby was still born about 3 years ago. He shows me photos of her grave and the flowers he and his wife take there. They now have an adorable little girl, Harper. Their pain is still fresh for losing Bella Rose.

People will try to console you in the only way they know how. Sometimes you have to learn to take it with a grain of salt or simply walk away. Pray to our Father for a healing on your pain.

I have never understood how people can happily spout the same clichéd crap to people during troubling times.
I am so sorry for your and your wife's loss. I hope in time you can both heal. Right now, you guys need each other, so don't lock each other out in your grief.