I Was a Victim: The Steubenville Rape Case is Not Isolated!!

Originally posted by eletheia
reply to post by kimish

 

A rapist doesn't require a trigger for their actions

* Not all victims of rape are dressed provocatively

* Not all victims of rape are intoxicated to the extent of being "fair game" or "asking for it"

to a potential rapist

* Not all victims of rape are in secluded areas or off the beaten track.....indeed some have

even been raped by someone who has broken into their homes (where they have a right to

feel safe) and to add to that not all of them have been young there have been cases reported

where the victim has been in their 60's 70's and even 80's.

Yes yes yes, I know I know. I believe I didn't state that all rapes happen because of ^^^^
I have family and loved ones that are victims and survivors. I was merely suggesting that some individuals need to know more about the other sex at a younger age so when they get older they are able to make wiser decisions. In other words, do things to lessen the risk of something happening.
I liken it to a $1 dollar bill. I'd rather have a $1 bill in my pocket as opposed to none. Hence, give some youth knowledge at a young age in order to aid their critical thinking as they get older.
2/10 women getting raped is better then 3/10, agreed? (NOTE:

reply to post by peck420




You do realise that I am entitled to have the same freedom to wear what I like, drink as

much as I like, go any where I want ....The same as any man on the planet, without

the fear of being raped by some inept low life.


I don't know where you get that I said 'that some should have more self control so that others

can have none?'

reply to post by eletheia


Noone ever said you weren't entitled to those things. Show me where someone mention it and I will stand corrected.
What was said, simplified, was that those things cause a greater risk of something happening hence the education at a young age to bring about awareness about such atrocities and how some things may "trigger" other things to happen.

Note: PLease read my words over and over so they aren't taken out of context or twisted. I often have problems putting my thoughts into words, if you couldn't tell already :/

reply to post by sonnny1





I am in complete agreement with your sentiments


I have seen it first hand with my own daughter raising her daughter just turned 16yrs

We are both appalled at the lack of guidance, lack of boundries, and lack of concern

of the parents of her peers.

reply to post by Starwise


Great post. This happens more than people are willing to admit or perhaps they just don't care.

At age 15, I was kidnapped, raped, and almost murdered. At age 15, my daughter and her friend were snatched off the street in broad daylight and sexually assaulted by five thugs.

Women are treated like garbage here and all over the world.

In my case, the POS who raped me gagged me with my bra and tried to hang me from a tree. Yet ironically, there is this loud "national conversation" about racism as if African Americans are still being lynched, meanwhile we barely whisper about the plight of women and girls.

We say it's ok to level misogyny at Hillary Clinton and Sarah Palin, but calling Barack Obama a "liar" will send the media into a race-baiting frenzy. Let's be honest, our national media doesn't care about women and girls who are raped.

I am tired of whispering about these things. It's time women put ourselves first.

reply to post by kimish

I did read your posts and understood you were not condoning what they did. If you look at my post itwas not a reply to your post but to the whole issue. As I was closing, I did want to respond to the one scenario you offered,

"I've seen many many women that were hammered begging for D**k), and the boys did what she had asked and then carried on well after she had passed out"

I understand their thinking may have been compromised by their drinking. The point I was making is that as soon as a girl is unconscious she is unable to say no. A woman has the right to say no at anytime and when she says no that ends it.

I just wanted to clarify that.

Originally posted by eletheia
reply to post by sonnny1

 

I am in complete agreement with your sentiments

I have seen it first hand with my own daughter raising her daughter just turned 16yrs

We are both appalled at the lack of guidance, lack of boundries, and lack of concern

of the parents of her peers.

Agree.

The Children are really the victims in all this. No way are my Daughters EVER going to be put or left in a situation where there is a legitimate chance that they will be Raped. Yes, Rape often happens when a predator takes advantage of someone, but leaving a child in a position, Male or Female, to become victims of a crime can be averted with common sense, or lessen the odds of it occurring.

I really think this might have not happened if ANY of the Parents were aware the children were unsupervised. There are alot of hurt family's dealing with this particular case.

And..... I am appalled that 420,000 rapes occur each year in prisons that involve men on men. The whole fabric of Society is falling apart at the seams..... Sad.

reply to post by grayeagle


Understandable. And I apologize if I come across as crass or rude.
I'm not too good at playing devils advocate... but then again, this would be the wrong thread to do so in hindsight.

Much love to all
Kimish

What I find funny about this thread is that the second post in the thread comes just short of calling for the systematic eradication of all men on Earth. Disgusting.

If that statement had said Jews instead of Men, the member would be looking at a ban. Feminism disgusts me sometimes. We are so damn PC around here that we dare not call out such disgusting behavior and instead give it a "star" in the name of internet bravery.

Wtfever

reply to post by JayinAR


You conveniently left out this part of that comment:

"Thoughts like this are of course wrong as there's nothing wrong with most men."

I think you fail to understand how horrific it feels to have your child tell you she was sexually assaulted by five pieces of garbage while she and a friend were walking to the park in the middle of the afternoon. And I don't think you understand how tricky it is to try to leave your fingerprints inside a rapist's glove compartment because you hope that's one place they won't think to wipe down. Or how it feels to try to tell some stranger that you love them through a bra-gag so that they won't hang you from a tree.

I don't see where a little man-rage is so out of line. One in four women will be raped in her lifetime. That means there are a whole lot of sick men out there. You don't like it? Meh, so what.

I'd like to see how "feminist" you become if your daughter is ever victimized by a rapist. I think you'd be better off worrying about men who rape rather than "feminists."

Originally posted by eletheia
reply to post by peck420

 

You do realise that I am entitled to have the same freedom to wear what I like, drink as

much as I like, go any where I want ....The same as any man on the planet, without

the fear of being raped by some inept low life.

I'm going to be the un-PC person in the room and say NO, no you don't have the RIGHT to put yourself in as much harm as possible WITHOUT FEAR of being harmed. You have the right to PROSECUTE and expect that your attackers be punished to the fullest extent under the law for their heinous crime that no one should ever be allowed to commit, but no, you don't have the right to go walking in a thong and bra into a crowd of drunken men, drunk past the legal limit yourself, and have NO FEAR of being harmed.

We don't live in a perfect world, and the expectation that we should be allowed to be as huge morons as we want to be and never have any repercussions for it is ridiculous and has landed us in this nanny state. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF. And then call the cops and go to court when even your best attempts at staying safe were violated.

I say this as a woman, and mother of a young girl. Take. Responsibility. For. Yourself.

reply to post by 00nunya00


You wrote:

"You have the right to PROSECUTE and expect that your attackers be punished to the fullest extent under the law for their heinous crime that no one should ever be allowed to commit, but no, you don't have the right to go walking in a thong and bra into a crowd of drunken men, drunk past the legal limit yourself, and have NO FEAR of being harmed."

True.

But, she still has a right to to go walking in a thong and bra into a crowd of drunken men, drunk past the legal limit, and not be raped.

And I think this is where all the lines get blurred. Yes, she should fear it, but she would be in no way asking for it, inviting it, nor would she deserve it.

I was extremely angered that only 2 boys went down for that atrocity. Everyone posting on twitter about it and present in the video who did nothing to stop it should have also gotten time. They received slaps on the wrist and not the wake up call society needed.

Originally posted by XGodofWar
I was extremely angered that only 2 boys went down for that atrocity. Everyone posting on twitter about it and present in the video who did nothing to stop it should have also gotten time. They received slaps on the wrist and not the wake up call society needed.

I read that 16 other people may face charges for refusing to cooperate and for failing to report this crime. There will be a grand jury as to this matter in April, I believe.

reply to post by MotherMayEye


Hopefully they all get charged as accomplices. IMO to watch something like that go down and not even attempt to stop it.... that's dirty.
May the shame rest upon all of these individuals and may it haunt them throughout their natural lives.

reply to post by kimish


Agree 100%.

And yet I can't help but notice that our culture has some kind of sick tolerance for this kind of crap like it's just some drunken prank and not a felony.

Originally posted by MotherMayEye
reply to post by 00nunya00

 

You wrote:

"You have the right to PROSECUTE and expect that your attackers be punished to the fullest extent under the law for their heinous crime that no one should ever be allowed to commit, but no, you don't have the right to go walking in a thong and bra into a crowd of drunken men, drunk past the legal limit yourself, and have NO FEAR of being harmed."

True.

But, she still has a right to to go walking in a thong and bra into a crowd of drunken men, drunk past the legal limit, and not be raped.

And I think this is where all the lines get blurred. Yes, she should fear it, but she would be in no way asking for it, inviting it, nor would she deserve it.

I agree with your first statement, and disagree with the *eventuality* of your second.

I agree that a woman who wears next to nothing and goes out and gets too drunk has the right to wake up hungover for her mistakes and nothing more. However, I think the latter part is where we start taking things too far just because some stupid moron made some ridiculous statement at some point in the past, and now we have twisted the statement in our own statement of rights.

If I put on a skirt that shows my thong and almost my crotch, and go downtown and get drunk to where I can't be trusted to drive, and park myself in a bar full of drunk frat boys, what am I expecting? What am I "asking for" in all senses of the word? It's like the old debate about where our first amendment rights end; do I have the right to go into an airport and scream "BOMB BOMB BOMB!!!" even though I'm not actually making any sort of threat, and expect not to be arrested for the impression I'm giving off? No.

Should I have the right to walk naked and drunk out of my gourd down a street of desperate men and not be raped? Sure. Should I EXPECT to be raped? Absolutely, in a hot minute. And you know, I would expect the law to prosecute and jail those men, but I would NEVER expect anyone to feel sorry for me. Or call me a "hero" like people are calling this chick who got drunk enough to not even be able to say "no" around a bunch of morons who could be expected to rape a drunk chick. And THAT is my point.

Originally posted by MagesticEsoteric
reply to post by quietlearner

 

I appreciate your kind words.

Although I do feel a sense of strength for speaking about what happened to me, I do not feel very strong right now. Quite the opposite actually.

Honestly, right now, I feel like I'm walking on that very campus...wondering who knows...what do they know...what did they see.

Just by talking about what happened, I feel like there is a huge bulls eye on my back. Wondering if there might just happen to be someone on this forum that knows what happened to me that night.

Someone that knows more than I ever will.

I'm sorry you feel this way
I don't know if it will help but I consider ATS to be one of the weird corners of the internet were the serious and wise people outnumber the usual mindless trolls
as long as you don't disclose your personal info I think you are pretty safe anonymity wise
and I doubt ATS member will go out of their way to find more about you with bad intentions
I think most of us understand the seriousness of this topic and try to be respectful

Originally posted by 00nunya00

I agree with your first statement, and disagree with the *eventuality* of your second.

I agree that a woman who wears next to nothing and goes out and gets too drunk has the right to wake up hungover for her mistakes and nothing more. However, I think the latter part is where we start taking things too far just because some stupid moron made some ridiculous statement at some point in the past, and now we have twisted the statement in our own statement of rights.

If I put on a skirt that shows my thong and almost my crotch, and go downtown and get drunk to where I can't be trusted to drive, and park myself in a bar full of drunk frat boys, what am I expecting? What am I "asking for" in all senses of the word? It's like the old debate about where our first amendment rights end; do I have the right to go into an airport and scream "BOMB BOMB BOMB!!!" even though I'm not actually making any sort of threat, and expect not to be arrested for the impression I'm giving off? No.

Going into an airport and yelling "BOMB BOMB BOMB!!!" is a crime, even if it's not a real threat. So yes, you should expect to be arrested and you deserve to be arrested. Dressing in a bra and thong and going into a crowd of drunken men may likely be indecent exposure and you should expect to be arrested and you deserve to be arrested -- but you don't deserve to be raped.

But we know 1 in 4 women are raped in her lifetime so it should not surprise a woman that she is raped after dressing in a bra and thong and going into a crowd of drunken men. But she still has every right to do just that and NOT be raped. Rape is not an acceptable punishment for indecent exposure. As I said earlier, she should fear it, but she's not to blame for anything but having bad judgment.

[EDIT: And once we start blaming victims for being raped, where does it end? Is my 15 year old responsible because she was wearing shorts in June and walking on a public street where men could see her? Where do we draw the line? Who gets to decide?

Under no circumstances are victims to blame for being raped. That's the way I see it and there is no wiggle room. Common sense may keep you safe...but no one has the right to rape someone no matter the circumstance. And then again, common sense may not be enough.]