Pffft. You losers are missing out on these fantastic deals of a lifetime. I had to smother an old lady and push a child in to traffic to get my perfect camping spot (coming to you from the wonders of my soon to be replaced smartphone). I rented a box truck just to fit all the useless junk that I'm going to buy because all the prices are slashed to oblivion! And while you wallow in your possession-less lives, never feeling the warmth from that 80 inch flat screen TV that you paid almost nothing for or the completeness of having kicked seven children, three women, an elderly man, and a crippled man just to get that set of toys that reminds you so fondly of your childhood. Yeah, it may be a little chilly sitting in my camp chair covered with a jacket I bought last year for 25% of the actual price (which I'll replace this year), I'll soon be enjoying true happiness. True happiness that you un-materialistic freaks will never and can never know.
Excuse me, I have to plan my death charge in to the store. There's a fat guy in line in front of me, he may be useful.