When you are a free spirited person, you tend to drift off from the basis of "common sense of self." You alter your brain chemistry merely by your
thought process, and your perception gradually ascends to newer heights. Seeing reality as an observant, and empathetic being
your inner and external environment.
I've been free spirited for about two years, and went through massive changes in my social and inner environment; my un-like minded ex left me (for
the best lol), my close friends whom are very analytical seemed to drift away, and physiological sensations such as: hearing high pitch frequencies
and seeing energy in motion (I do have really photo-sensitive eyes).
The aloneness is starting to sink in heavily in this present moment. I've always enjoyed the silence, the emptiness, and recently have been using the
aloneness to promote positive changes through meditation, and even staying on top of my college classwork.
But this weekend (and several weekends before) I don't have any plans, don't have any consistent plans with a young lady, yeah I might hit up this
halloween party tonight and get my rage on, but when I come back home, that aloneness will come back tenfold.
Trust me, I am grateful and do recognize non-tangible gifts in my life such as: My healthy body, mind, and spirit. I'm gifted to have a mother who is
very free spirited, some friends whom are like minded too and I can talk to; going to be very honest, I'm frustrated I cannot attract a young lady
whom is very like minded and free spirited like myself. My last relationship over a year ago first led to hurt, but then a few deeper meanings in what
I learned about myself; maturity, understanding, and acceptance were the deeper meanings that let me grow and move on with a new mindset on having
Furthermore, aloneness has been a benefactor for most of my life, it is my sanctuary to say the least; with these recent mental gifts and an elevating
profound perspective on life, I'm DONE dwelling in the aloneness for a majority of my life, and desire to manifest a like minded girlfriend, a
consistent social life, and so much more abundance if I put my subconscious mind to it.
*Desire is egotistical, but c'mon! We're souls having a human experience and SHOULD be able to enjoy it to the fullest with manifesting any positive
desires our free will can imagine*
Patience, trust, and allowing is an understatement, and I feel there has to be a more consistent way than waiting for opportunities to come.
I'm twenty years old, an old soul, and can occasionally be a stubborn-indigo young adult. Although, the stubborness does make me independent, and is
a mental drive to create changes in my life
Can anybody relate to my feelings this present moment? I feel the aloneness is really hitting me immensely; trying to find a lesson or deeper meaning
in it, and would like to know if anyone else is experiencing this overwhelming feeling of aloneness...