posted on Oct, 15 2012 @ 03:48 AM
Originally posted by JValhalla
I will post this now before it is National News. I have refrained from using too much graphic detail.
Today I witnessed a tragic event. While I was at the Gun Range this afternoon a local man turned the gun on himself and took his own life. I heard
the shot, saw the destruction of his face along with all the gore, peoples reactions, The panic that perused afterwards. I don't remember driving
home, now I am here a few hours later and since then my wife has told me I have blanked out several times. I have 8 missed calls from the local news
stations asking for a statement. Two reporters have been to my house. I don't know how they got my number or address.
I have been to war, I have not ever had a flashback from this conflict. Never had any symptoms of PTSD. My wife has already called a therapist for me
to talk to tomorrow because she is very worried. When I get home I have a set routine check on the baby and go out back and play with the dogs. I have
been in bed since about 1:30 staring at the ceiling. Not having any interest in either. Wondering if I could have stopped this man, If he could have
turned the gun on me or other patrons. It's crazy I was sitting outside having a cigarette with this man just a few minutes earlier. He gave no signs
no warnings. If he had said anything I would have told the range master.
Since the suicide this afternoon my brain is recounting past events and I cant stop it. I have had very personal events with suicide and now they all
keep flooding my head...I can't stop them. Sorry if this post seems more like rambling.
I DO NOT WANT A SECOND AMENDMENT ARGUMENT HERE. MODS PLEASE KEEP PEOPLE ON TOPIC. IF THIS MAN WAS THIS DISTURBED HE WOULD HAVE DONE IT ANYWAYS.
I just don't know.....
It hits you harder when you aren't mentally prepared for it. When you were off to war you had a chance to put up some mental and emotional walls
because you knew it was coming. You might have not known when exactly...but you knew that there was a real good chance the entire time you were in
Iraq/Afghanistan/Vietnam/wherever that you would gun shots, bodies, etc....but it's mighty different when you aren't braced for it.
About a decade ago I was relocated to LA for work for a 9 month assignment. My very first day in town I woke up at the hotel in Orange County and
went across the street to the grocery store to pick up a few things for my hotel room.
I wasn't in the store 10 minutes and I witnessed some guy go totally batsh^t w/ a samurai sword and behead two people and cut another guys arm off
for absolutely no reason. As luck would have it...there was a cop in the store picking up donuts at the time (not kidding...he was actually picking
up donuts) and he put a bullet in the guy before he could hurt anyone else.
Needless to say...it really f^cked me up. I didn't sleep decently for almost three months w/out taking something to knock me out. Much like
you...I've been in my share of other situations that could have or should have caused PTSD...but I never had a problem with it.
The only difference I was able to pin down was that in all of the other situations I had a chance to put myself in the right frame of mind
first...even if it was just a minute or two.
I wish there was an easy answer for how to deal with it...but quite frankly the only thing that worked for me was time and waiting it out.
Good luck....and don't be too proud to ask the doc for something to get you to sleep at night for awhile if you need it. You can buy those Ambien
things OTC...but they always left me really, really, foggy in the morning and actually kind of made things worse. Get the doc to prescribe the Grade
A stuff for you if you need it. It's worth every penny in my book.