Like Our Fathers Before Us...

What is more important: honouring the wishes of those we love, or doing what is right? This is a moral dilemma that we must face at different periods throughout our lives. While the actual definition of “what is right” remains debatable, there is no denying that there are times when we must choose to side with those we love, or side with the truth (or what we can best judge as truth) using logic and reason. The problem is that the closer we are to another individual, the more difficult the task becomes.

Many people seem to believe that honouring one's parents is a highly significant endeavour to undertake. This might be due to religious beliefs, cultural upbringing, societal pressures, or an innate sense of duty among other reasons. What's important is that we feel an intense obligation to do what we believe another individual wanted us to do – this is especially the case for those that have passed on. How many times do go against what is best when we tell ourselves that “this is what he/she would have wanted”?

While honouring the desires of those that have passed on is noble, it can also lead to repeating the same mistakes. The only way to break a negative cycle is for an individual to stand up against the tide and create a new positive one. This can be an extremely difficult task and the individual is, initially, likely to receive ridicule and contempt from those close to him/her. After all, most people are very resistant to change and we know that change is unpredictable, mysterious and risky.

“Breaking the cycle” is no easy feat and you may fail the first few times. The key is to keep trying until you can transform the negative pattern into a positive experience. Before you decide to shackle yourself in the confines of religious, cultural and societal expectations, remember to ask yourself whether the cycle is worth continuing.

reply to post by Dark Ghost

May I ask what prompted you to post this thread? I'm interested, that's all I can say at the moment.

So I agree 'honoring' is what we endeavor to do, strive to do, but is vastly overrated? You bet. At some point? At some point we all have to draw a line - not for everyone else but only for ourselves...cause no matter where you go? There you are. And you're the only one that has to live with you - honor or no - you can't live (by) another person's set of rules, life/living/religious system - that is - if you ever want to live as yourself.

But again, if you're up for sharing? I'd like to hear it.

peace

There is a difference between honoring and obeying.

Honor in Greek:

Timao:
1. to estimate, fix the value
a. for the value of something belonging to one's self
2. to honour, to have in honour, to revere, venerate

In Hebrew:

Kabad:
to be heavy, be weighty, be grievous, be hard, be rich, be honourable, be glorious, be burdensome, be honoured
to be heavy, be insensible, be dull
to be made heavy, be honoured, enjoy honour, be made abundant
to get oneself glory or honour, gain glory
to make honourable, honour, glorify
to cause to be honoured
to make oneself heavy, make oneself dense, make oneself numerous
to honour oneself

There's a wide range in this, but one thing is notable. To honor your parents, you can do things in your life that cause them to be honored. Being good, upright, and just brings honor to your parents, whether or not you are obedient to their whims.

reply to post by silo13


There was no specific life event that prompted me to make this thread. I was just thinking about life and how we can get torn between making decisions that are for the sake others and those that are for our own betterment. I was thinking about naming the thread "Breaking the Cycle" but it seemed too simplistic for the message I was trying to convey.

Thanks for taking the time to read my thread.

The Gospel of Thomas:
55) Jesus said, "Whoever does not hate his father and his mother
cannot become a disciple to Me. And whoever does not hate his
brothers and sisters and take up his cross in My way will not be
worthy of Me."

reply to post by Itisnowagain


That's a strange passage. Perhaps the word "hate" is an incorrect translation?

reply to post by Dark Ghost


It does seem a bit harsh. I have checked online and it is translated as 'hate' in all i could find.