Schools ban children making best friends

So just to get this straight.. the same country that has the most security cameras per capita in the world, that has schools banning hugs, or holding hands, and has special schools that deliberately label child as an "it" instead of "male" or "female", is also now trying to "educate" the upcoming generation to never form a close bond with someone else. I genuinely feel disturbed by what the next 1-2 generations are going to become, it really does have strong echoes of 1984...

Originally posted by Agent_USA_Supporter
reply to post by loam

 

Elementary friends and high school friends dont last forever because everyone moves on with either lives or sometimes Jobs.

edit on 23-3-2012 by Agent_USA_Supporter because: (no reason given)

That may be true for you, but not for everyone. My mom has had the same best friend for over 48 years. They met in kindergarden. My dad had the same best friend for over 30 years, and they met in high school. His best friend still visits his grave to to this day.

I've had the same best friend for 27 years, and I'm only 31 (well, almost 31.) We met when we were 4, and have been best friends since. Heck, at one point everyone assumed we'd end up married we were so close.

Of my two other best friends, one has been my best friend since 6th grade, and the other since 9th. Those are the 3 of the 4 people I could share anything with, and our friendships are still strong after all these years.

As for this rule, it's ridiculous, and needs to be banned. Kids should be encouraged to make lifelong friendships, while interacting with new people.

I won't get started on the ridiculousness of the no public affection rules schools have.

Insanity.Wonder what agenda they are pushing here-and time for my daily THANK YOU GOD! that i live in South Africa,where i have not yet heard of this asinine BS..Because here, there is no such interference.My daughters has had best friends,argued,made up or lost best friends and made new ones.LEARNING ABOUT LIFE+HUMAN NATURE IN THE PROCESS!!,YOU MORONIC NITWITS WHO THINK UP THIS RIDICULOUS #! Mind boggled again.But then maybe its not stupidity but some darker agenda.One world government(every one together) as opposed to autonomous government(diversity and independent decision-making) In which case this makes perfect sense..

Sometimes a best friend isn't in your "group". Those groups of friends will come and go, but your best friend will always be there for LIFE, no matter how different your lives have become.

I completely agree with the statement that a "best-friend" is like a brother or sister, if not sometimes closer than a brother or sister.


MY "BEST FRIEND" STORY.
When I was in the third grade, my best friend was new to the school, and after he broke his arm, a couple of us started "talking and hanging" out with the kid. We soon found out that he was pretty dang cool. Through out the rest of elementary school the three of us always played and hung out together.

Come middle school, our elementary school was broken up, where half of the students went to one school, and the other half went to another. Lucky me got the raw draw, and went to a different school than the other two. But this is where we learned the resolve of our relationship as friends. We learned that we can have friends outside of our own friendship, but when push comes to shove, we always had each other to rely on. Sadly the third person in our crew, decided he was more "popular" than we were, and began to turn his back on us. To be honest, I really never saw him again (till my adult life), since I went to a different school.

My "BEST FRIEND" and I hung out from time to time together through out middle school, but mostly we had our own friends at middle school we hung with. Once we got to high school, he practically lived at my house during freshman and sophomore year, yet, through the friends we made in middle school, we learned that we didn't have to be in the same "crowed" to remain best friends.

At the end of sophomore year, my friend was involved in a serious car accident, and had broken his right leg in 12 places, and had at least one broken bone in all of his limbs. This took a toll on him, and he began to hang out more often with his "other" boyscout friends (I wasn't in the boyscouts). This became the turning point, where it became obvious that even though we were best friends, and when push comes to shove, you always know you have someone there for you. Through out the rest of high school, we had times where we still spent time together, but mostly it was one of those, "I'll go over here, you go over there, but if you need me, you know I'm here". Our graduation from highschool was one in which both our families came together for the joyful occasion. We did spend some time together prior to college, where we both ended up at two different Universities (an hour from eachother) and in fact even joined rival fraternities (both campuses at the time had both fraternities). But we always knew we had eachothers back if need be.

It has now been 10 years since college, and today, we both face separate lives. He is a police officer and lives about an hour from here, I am a website developer. He spends his life spending time in his suburban neighborhood, where all of the other police in that town live, and spends most of his time with his police buddies.
I spend much of my time working and really don't have anyone I "hang" out with outside my family. We talk here and there, when ever he comes home, or I happen to be in the area he is working, we get together and have a beer and talk. We go to eachothers childrens birthdays, but outside of that we don't really talk all that much.

but even today, we both know that if either one of us, needs the other, we will be there in an instant.

THIS IS WHAT A BEST FRIEND IS.


IN CONTRAST

Being a military child my wife never had the chance to make close friends at a young age. In middle school, and a couple years of highschool, she did make a friend in which she though was her best friend for years. Then my wife started making some life changes, and became more confident in herself. She soon realized that it was a one sided relationship between the two. Her "friend" had been walking on her, since they met, and once my wife started becoming more confident in herself, she began to fight back at the insults her friend would throw at her. My wife is a strong lady, and has handled the realization pretty well. She is still acquainted with her, but by no means trusts her.

Because my wife is now more confident with herself, I am constantly blamed by her friend that I corrupted her, and therefore tries to encourage my wife to leave me.

The fact is, because of my wife moved around a lot, she was unable to make deep friendship and pretty much had to chose what she could get as a "friend" at the time. These friends were always part of her "group".

So in closing

The bond between best friends at a young age, can last a lifetime. As they get older, they may grow to be two different people with two different lives, but all in all, they will forever support you, and be there for you when you are in need. Being able to find that friend young, deepens this bond no matter what the future holds.

Originally posted by Agent_USA_Supporter
reply to post by loam

 

Actually i agree with the ban i am surprised they haven't done this in the 90s

and why i say that? because a kid i hated the whole idea best friends.

Because when kids do make these best friends of there's and you want to join along with them they wont allow you, sometimes its like a secret society and makes you feel left out as an outcast.


Elementary friends and high school friends dont last forever because everyone moves on with either lives or sometimes Jobs.

edit on 23-3-2012 by Agent_USA_Supporter because: (no reason given)

I feel terrible for you. You either thought you had a friend, and they abandon you, or you never got the chance to achieve a deep bond with someone.

If you read my post above, you will see that a "best friend" doesn't have to have the same interests as you. nor do they have to be part of your "group".

My "best friend" and I have been so since 1988 and from then to now, we rarely ever hung with the same crowd.

A best friend, is way more than someone you "hang" with. A best friend is someone you know would drop anything for you. They know your secrets, they know you will never break their trust. They are your comfort blanket in life.

I will say this though, I was lucky to find a friend like my "best friend" We have always hung with a different crowd. We rarely were interested in the same things.

If it weren't for everything lining up just right, I don't think I would have ever been friends with him, but everything did line up right, and we face a bond (as different as we are) that can never be broken. And this I promise you, it has been tested over and over.

For those of you that do not have that "best friend", I hope and pray that one day you will know what it's like.

There is nothing more appeasing than to know that someone here on earth has your back, no matter what.

It's a tad sensationalist this.

It's not an actual ban. You simply cannot ban children from having best friends.
I understand the adult viewpoint's expressed in this thread from people who have formed life long friends from childhood. This however is just the schools way of encouraging children to be more open with others, not to be so cliquey and avoid the obvious pitfalls, falling out's and upsets that happen when children decide they have a new best friend every week.

Calm down folks...I'm sure anyone who's a parent here has had to comfort their upset child over such things. Children can be nasty, children and adult's who you thought were your friend can be worse. I see this as over coddling the children & trying to wrap them in cotton wool much like the sports days debacle. In the end we all lose friends, enjoy our fair share of disappointments / heartache and failures and yes I can understand the reasoning behind trying to shield them from that as long as possible, but that's a parents responsibility and not the systems, and as all parent's know it won't work...If we can't shield them, the system hasn't got a hope in hell.

reply to post by Suspiria


Here is a question, that may help sum up the reason behind this.

Do the children pick their own groups?

Are the "groups" chosen for the kids?

If they are chosen for the kids, is it random, or based on social class?

I suspect the government is trying to isolate people from their friends support networks, and get them used to being isolated.

An isolated person would be more dependant on governmental diatrabe and drivel, and therefore, easier to control.

Originally posted by loam Instead, the primary pupils are being encouraged to play in large groups.

Like a flock of sheep perhaps ?

whew!
for a second there I thought they were coming after my invisible friends
( stand down guys, disintegrators on stun!)

I still have my best freind(s) from child hood
we may not see each others for ages but we just pick up where we left off when we do.
I eventually made friends with my worst ememies from childhood too...

reply to post by Suspiria

Originally posted by Suspiria
It's a tad sensationalist this.

It's not an actual ban. You simply cannot ban children from having best friends.

Of course it's a ban...

I think you are confusing the FACT of a ban with its effectiveness.

The fact that several schools would impose this restriction is nothing less than outrageous.

reply to post by Agent_USA_Supporter


I still have my bff from four years old and most of my high school friends.

For people to try to ban 'best friends' ... that's absurd ... is it even possible?
Psychologically speaking .. I don't think it's possible to ban it.

Originally posted by DaTroof
"Best friends" are kind of strange.
You have friends, and you have people you know. There's no such thing as a "best friend".

You obviously aren't a 10 year old girl. 'Best friends' are expected. It happens naturally.

Whoever comes up with these ridiculous concepts needs psychiatric help, along with those who allow them to be implemented.

This is yet another classic example of the State indoctrinating the children.

They want their future herds to lack the support of a close friend so they feel more isolated and can then turn to the government with all their problems.

Then the government can "solve" those problems creating a generation more accustomed to it.

Further - they want the herd to not have close associations with each other so that they will more likely spy and report on each other.

This is indoctrination - plain and simple.

What the hell is wrong with the UK?

I have always understood their progressive positions...but this is one of the most extremist far left policies I have ever heard of.

I think there are many levels of "friend"

I have "best friends" who I consider family, I have friends that I hang out with sometimes but not every week, and I have acquaintances that enjoy the same interests as me but I only see them every now and then (save my co-workers who I see everyday).

But children usually make friends one at a time, especially kids who have social problems and are really really shy (like I was when I was a kid). I think that is who this will hurt the most.

The best bit about all of this is the fact that young people are leaving school thick as # and these "educated" people are sitting around a bastard desk discussing how damaging to kids falling out with a friend can be! WTF!!!

Next they'll be telling them to never fall in love because you'll probably get your heart broken and we all know how bloody painful and life changing that is!!

Cant believe whats going on all across the world, has it always been this way!? Have we ALWAYS had IDIOTS running the show!?

Originally posted by AwakeinNM
George Orwell would be so proud.

Looks like they're accelerating the program. We're in the endgame.

Its because they're desperate and losing it, most people are somewhat awake now, if not more fully.

They will not succeed in any of their long term goals.

reply to post by DaTroof


Yea im going to disagree with you completely

I have many friends, a core group of 12 of us that are always hanging out together, then we all have people we are friends with but we all have a best friend also. One of my buddies ive known since I was 6 years old, we grew up together playing football and baseball. He will be the best man at my wedding and the godfather to one of my kids when I have them. There is such a thing as a best friend and I hope you find one one day.

Originally posted by DaTroof
"Best friends" are kind of strange.

You have friends, and you have people you know. There's no such thing as a "best friend".

I beg to differ.



I don't think schools should have any say in this whatsoever. If this continues, what aspect of our lives won't be controlled and micro managed? Will we eventually have mandatory notices sent to our phones or TVs to remind us to take our prescription medication, to eat three balanced meals a day then brush right after, or home inspections required by law "for the safety of children?" Where does it end? This is nuts.